Chapter Four

Beautiful movie poster made by XxMrsSimplexX :) So cool!

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Better Than Revenge

Chapter Four

My eyes became as wide as saucers and I nearly choked on my own spit. This was not part of the plan! Well, none of what had just happened was part of any plan of mine, but getting a phone call from Christian freaking Ryder was definitely not part of any plan I would have ever made!

I was about to say something completely inappropriate to myself, but then I remembered I was probably still on national TV and should probably control myself. Little children could have been watching this show, for all I knew. I didn’t know why a child would waste their time by watching that pathetic excuse of a TV show when they could be outside playing with their friends or inside playing videogames, but that was beside the point.

I was actually tempted to just step on my phone. The sacrifice wouldn’t be completely in vain. That way, I wouldn’t have to deal with this. It was the loser way of handling this, I know.

I then remembered that buying a new phone that was half as good as the one I had would be a pain in the neck, though, so I stopped myself in time.

“Hello?” Christian Ryder asked after a moment of silence.

What do I do?! I screamed at myself, panicking internally. Okay, Sophia, just…. Just don’t reply to him! Don’t make any sounds! Nothing! Be as quiet as a mouse! Wait, no, don’t do that. Mice can get pretty loud sometimes with their scratching. Be quieter than a mouse!

“Are you there, Mystery Girl?” he asked again after I didn’t reply.

I scowled in annoyance. “I have a name, dip-shit!”

So much for not replying to him. I didn’t even last one minute. How sad.

The two hosts laughed obnoxiously.

“Ryder, I think we found her,” one of the hosts said with a giggle.

I realized I could hear the echo of our conversation on the TV, so I looked up and sure enough, the conversation was being featured on the show.

Great.

For once, I kind of wished I hadn’t been right about still being on national TV. I knew most girls would’ve killed for an opportunity like this, but I couldn’t even force myself to get excited. I dreamed of being on TV, yes, but not like this! I didn’t want to be remembered as Christian Ryder’s Favorite Fan Girl! I wanted to make my own name in this world. I didn’t want Christian Ryder’s name to be associated with me in any way.

So basically, this was getting on my nerves.

Christian Ryder laughed out loud. “I think so. Well, what’s your name then, MG?”

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

I was trying to be nice, believe it or not. I really was. But when you felt as strongly towards someone as I did towards Christian Ryder, it was hard to stop the words from escaping your lips.

He chuckled nervously. “Touché. But I’m sure everyone here is curious. Come on; don’t leave us hanging like that, MG.”

“Would you stop calling me that?” I snapped, rolling my eyes even though he couldn’t see me.

“I will as soon as you tell me your name,” he replied with a chuckle.

“Not happening.”

It was too late to be nice to him anyway, so I figured if I was rude enough, he might become uncomfortable and hang up. I had a feeling if I hung up, they would just call back so I could “enjoy my prize fully”.

Idiots.

“How about I try and guess? And if I’m right, you have to tell me, or it won’t be fair,” he suggested.

“No.”

I was glad they hadn’t somehow managed to sneak secret cameras into my house or they would’ve seen the mix of crazy expressions I made as I talked to him. they weren’t pretty, that much I could tell you.

I hadn’t talked to him in years. I wasn’t used to this. This was definitely out of my comfort zone. I hadn’t even considered ever talking to him again, and I was fine that way. Why did this stupid show have to ruin that?

“Come on,” he insisted obnoxiously. “Don’t be that way.”

“You’re so annoying,” I complained with a scowl.

All three of them laughed. “I’m sure hearing that from a fan is a first for you, Ryder,” the blonde host said with a laugh.

“Well, that would be because I’m not a fan,” I retorted in annoyance. “Can I hang up now? I’ve had enough of this prize.”

“We still have at least five more minutes of the show to fill,” the brunette said with a giggle. “Your prize isn’t finished quite yet.”

I groaned out loud, making them laugh again.

Why were they laughing? I didn’t find this funny at all. It was just irritating.

“Alright, is your name Anna?” Christian Ryder asked me after thinking about it for a moment.

“Right,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Of course you’d pick the most common name in the world. Great job.”

He chuckled nervously. I was pretty sure my comment had embarrassed him. It made him look pretty stupid, after all.

Score!

I wasn’t particularly enjoying this, but if I could get a rise out of him and make him look bad on national TV, I was all for it. If I had to do this, I might as well make it memorable, right?

“How about Elizabeth?”

That was my middle name, so it didn’t count. I wasn’t going to give him that satisfaction, anyway.

“Shocker,” I said sarcastically, “another insanely common name.”

He laughed shortly. “Jennifer?” he tried with a hopeful look on his face. It was so weird talking to someone on the phone while seeing them on the TV screen as you talked…

“Do you have the brain capacity of a fruit fly or what?”

The girls laughed and he forced out a chuckle. “How about Laura?”

“Are your parents siblings?”

That one got me some disbelieving laughter. I was probably pushing it with that one.

“Of course not,” he said incredulously. “How about Jessica?”

“Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you had gotten enough oxygen at birth?”

I could tell I was really starting to make him nervous and embarrassed. “Er… Dorothy?”

“What do you think this is, the Wizard of Oz? Seriously?”

He tried to act like my rudeness wasn’t affecting him, but I could tell it was. Score one for Sophia, zilch for Christian Ryder. “Sarah?”

“You know, I heard you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?”

He wasn’t going to last much longer. I was breaking him; I knew that for sure. A guy could only take so many blows to the ego. And in this case, he was taking them on national TV. That was about a hundred times worse than if I were to have done it in private. Even someone with an ego as big as Christian Ryder was bound to break eventually.

I was such a genius!

“Amy?” he asked after a moment. “Amanda?”

“If you’re playing stupid, then I have some good news for you.” I paused for dramatic effect. “You’re winning!”

“Will you just tell me?” he demanded angrily, finally breaking. He was finished with his nice-guy façade; his true colors were showing.

Now was the moment to push it as far as I could.

“Am I making you angry?” I asked innocently.

“Well, a bit,” he said, trying to control himself again.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized sweetly. I could tell that all three of them were surprised by this, so I continued. “Don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to make an ass out of you. I can’t take the credit.”

He looked like he wanted to say something, but he stopped himself.

“Oh come on, don’t get mad!” I exclaimed. “You have a lot of well-wishers.” Once again, they all looked surprised. “I mean, they’d all love to throw you down one.”

“Will you please… just tell me your name?”

I had a feeling if I told him it; he would do something evil to me. I was sure I wasn’t his favorite person at the moment.

“Hmm,” I said, pausing once more. “You have suffered quite a bit by now, huh?”

“Kind of,” he replied irritably.

“That’s too bad.” I clicked my tongue. “You’ll just have to suffer even more. I’m not telling you.”

“What?”

I laughed and said, “Yeah, well, I’d love to keep talking to you, but I have to go walk my goldfish. This was fun, though! Thanks for the prize, whatever the name of your show is!”

And with that, I hung up. And the minute I did, Tori called me. I figured she was going to yell at me for being mean to her “future husband” so I just pressed ignore and went on with my business.

I was actually finished packing when she barged into my house, uninvited, to yell at me. It didn’t take as long as I had thought it would. “I can’t believe you!” she screamed with a horrified look on her face.

“What?” I asked innocently, looking up for a moment.

“Don’t play dumb!” she said, wagging her finger at me. “I can’t believe you did that!”

“Did what?” I finished zipping up my suitcase and shoved it under my bed.

“Sophia!” She groaned loudly, nearly stomping her feet. “You were so mean to him! You didn’t have to be that rude!”

“Tori, you know very well what I feel towards him,” I said sourly. “I wasn’t about to act like some crazy Ry-Hard.”

“I didn’t expect you to,” she said, flabbergasted, “but I didn’t expect you to be so mean, either!”

“I wanted him to stop talking to me, and that was the first thing that popped into my head! I figured if I was mean to him, he wouldn’t want to talk to me and he’d hang up or say the prize was over!”

She shook her head at me. “You totally embarrassed him, though! On TV! That shit gets recorded and saved and put on YouTube! This is horrible!”

“Oh, come on, Tori,” I exclaimed, rolling my eyes. “Don’t even try to tell me you weren’t sitting there on your bed, cracking up. You have to admit it was funny.”

She tried to fight the smile that threatened to expose her. “No! It wasn’t!”

“Really?” I asked skeptically. “I even used your favorite line! ‘Are your parents siblings’?”

It was just too much for her; she burst into giggles. “Oh, fine! It was funny! But it was so rude!”

I laughed. “That’s what makes it funny. Besides, that many people can’t possibly watch this show. It’s just a dumb gossip show. How bad could this be?”

***

I have never been more wrong in my entire life. That many people can’t possibly watch this show. It’s just a dumb gossip show. How bad can this be?

Seriously. What was I thinking?

As Tori predicted, videos of the episode I was featured in went viral, receiving a million hits in one day. I honestly hadn’t expected it to be that popular, but it was. Christian Ryder and Hollywood Tonight were more popular than I had originally thought.

Either that, or people were just twisted and happened to enjoy watching celebrities get bashed. Wait, of course people enjoyed that. I was one of those people.

It didn’t stop there, though. No, I wasn’t that lucky. My amusing comments on that show didn’t go unnoticed. I was being featured in silly girl magazines, all with the question, “Who is Ryder’s Mystery Girl?” I nearly barfed when I saw that title. It insinuated something that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Basically, everyone in America wanted to know my identity. Everyone was curious now, especially Christian Ryder, it seemed. And it was only a matter of time before someone who knew me decided they wanted to make a bit of cash by selling me out to the press. Either that, or Christian Ryder would give up on waiting for someone to out me and decide to just hire a detective to track me down.

If I had known that this would get me this much attention, I definitely wouldn’t have done it! I didn’t want to become famous for being “Ryder’s Mystery Girl”! I wanted to become famous because I worked for it. This wasn’t the way things were supposed to happen. This was a total disaster.

An example? When I went to the airport that day to board the plane to Hollywood, I wore a hoodie and hid my face. I didn’t want to risk being recognized. The day before, some crazy Ry-Hard recognized me and started screaming, “Oh-em-gee, I found Ryder’s Mystery Girl! Oh-em-gee!”

I have never run away so fast in my life. It’s truly a wonder what someone as completely non-athletic as me can do under pressure.

I knew I couldn’t hide forever, though. I was going to Hollywood, the home of both Christian Ryder and Hollywood Tonight. It was only a matter of time before someone found me. But by God, I was going to do everything in my power to avoid being in that situation for as long as I could… no matter what it took.

***

So while I was supposed to be doing my homework, I did this. :D And while I was supposed to be doing this, I was watching Jenna Marble's videos (I blame you. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!) If you have never watched a video of Jenna's, GO TO YOUTUBE RIGHT NOW AND WATCH ONE. They are frugging hilarious! Seriously.

But anyhoo. I hope you guys liked it!

VOTE.COMMENT.FAN.