2.13 - Emotionally Compromised

~~*~~

The Enterprise continued on its course to meet up with the fleet. Cali had continued working at his station, trying to keep his mind off of Jim and the unknown of his fate. He knew that if he let himself worry, he'd not be able to stop. He was somewhat thankful when Spock's father, Ambassador Sarek had come onto the bridge again and Spock had stepped away from the Captain's chair to speak with him. Keeping an eye on Spock, to make sure he was okay and keep his previous promise to the Vulcan, was an even better distraction than work.

Then Chekov spoke up, catching his attention as he called to the Captain. "Captain Spock, detecting unauthorized access to water turbine control board."

"Bring up the video." Spock ordered as he moved away from his father and towards the front of the bridge, coming to a stop next to the young Russian.

Cali turned around so that he could see, wondering what could be happening during all of this. He was shocked to see his partner on screen for a few seconds before he ran from frame. "Jim..." Cali called to him quietly without realising. The utter relief in his voice was almost heart-breaking.

Though Spock was almost overwhelmed with anger and frustration at seeing Jim back on his ship, he couldn't shake the warmth in his heart at hearing how relieved Cali was at the man's presence. Spock knew that Cali obviously felt worried for his partner, but Cali hadn't truly expressed how much it affected him, focusing on putting on a smile for his own sake. Spock had forgotten how good Cali could be at masking his feelings. Trying to shake off his thoughts of the cadet, he tapped the communicator. "Security, seal the engineering deck. We have intruders in turbine section three. Set phasers to stun."

~~*~~

As soon as Jim was escorted onto the bridge, he was suddenly stumbling back as Cali practically jumped on him, almost knocking him over since he was not prepared for the assault. Cali didn't care, in that moment, that what he was doing was completely unprofessional. He didn't care that everyone was looking, some giving judging looks. He was just too overwhelmingly relieved to see Jim safe that he just didn't care.

"Woah!" Jim gasped as he studied himself and looked at the body that had thrown himself at him. "Cali?" He questioned, though he of course knew the familiar silver hair and warm embrace belonged to his boyfriend. Though, he was still, of course, confused by the arms tightly wrapped around him as if trying to make sure he as real.

"You idiot..." Cali mumbled into Jim's shoulder, eyes closed as he tried to fight back tears. He hated crying. Why did Jim make him so emotional all the time? "I'm so glad you're safe."

"Hey, it's okay." Jim mumbled back in reassurance, easily able to hear the tearful relief.

In that moment, watching the emotional exchange, Spock didn't know what to feel. He was not used to feeling so many emotions, let along so many mixed and powerful emotions.

He still had barely let himself process let alone feel the complete overwhelming grief from losing so much. His planet. The lives of so many of his species. His mother. Then suddenly he felt so warm from the support, presence, and love of Caliaire. He still didn't know how to control the internal need to smile whenever Cali did. Then, of course, there was Kirk. His brain was trying to fight with the second-hand relief at seeing him safe from Cali and the anger he felt for the man for constantly trying to argue with him like he knew so much better. Then there was the feeling for Jim that Spock couldn't identify. An ugly feeling deep in his stomach as he watched him with Cali in his arms that fed his anger exponentially.

He was completely overwhelmed. And, unfortunately, the negative emotions won out, as they tend to do.

"Who are you?" Spock questioned, turning from the partners to the unknown man that had somehow gotten onto his ship with Kirk.

"I'm with him." The man replied quickly in a fairly thick Scottish accent at the same time that Jim gently moved Cali off of him and replied, "He's with me."

Scowling internally, and a little externally, at Jim, Spock turned his cold glare to the offending man. "We're travelling at warp speed. How did you manage to beam aboard this ship?"

"You're the genius, you figure it out." Jim spoke up smugly in defiance.

Cali frowned at his partner. He knew Jim didn't particularly like Spock, but he didn't think it was really appropriate for him to take digs at him when the question was a fair one. "Jim..." He warned lightly, though Kirk just flashed him his famous 'I've got this' smirk and ignored his warning.

"As Acting Captain of this vessel, I order you to answer the question."

"Well I'm not telling, Acting Captain. What di- What, now, that doesn't frustrate you, does it? My lack of cooperation. That- that doesn't make you angry." Jim continued, his tone mocking and defiant. As he spoke, he took a slight step towards Spock. Although the step wasn't actually with the intention of moving closer to the Vulcan but was meant to get him slightly away from Cali. He didn't know where this was going to go. He knew he had to keep pressing and hoped Spock wouldn't react violently for his face's sake, but he still couldn't risk Cali getting caught up in it if it did.

Already done with Jim's insubordination, Spock turned from him to the unknown. "Are you a member of Starfleet?"

"I- um- yes." He replied, his tone still quick and awkward as he interrupted himself, "Can I get a towel, please?"

"Under penalty of court martial, I order you to explain to me how you were able to beam aboard this ship while moving at warp."

"Well--"

"Don't answer him." Jim quickly interrupted making the man look between him and Spock as they started their back and forth.

"You will answer me."

"I'd rather not take sides."

"What is it with you, Spock?" Jim asked, bringing the attention of the room back onto him again, "Hmm? Your planet was just destroyed, your mother murdered, and you're not even upset."

"If you're presuming that these experiences in any way impede my ability to command this ship, you are mistaken."

"And yet you were the one who said fear was necessary for command. Did you see his ship? Do you see what he did?"

"Yes, of course I did."

"So, are you afraid, or aren't you?"

"I will not allow you to lecture me about the merits of emotion."

"Then why don't you stop me." Jim dared, taking a large step towards the Vulcan, face confident and back straight.

"Step away from me, Mister--"

"What is it like not to feel anger or heartbreak or the need to stop at nothing to avenge the death of the woman who gave birth to you?"

"Back away from me..." Spock warned, his eyes turning dark at the mention of his mother. Cali wanted desperately to stand in, but it was too late as Jim shouted the final straw.

"You feel nothing! It must not even compute for you! You never loved her!"

It happened as soon as he finished the sentence. Spock let out an angry shout as he decked Jim, making him stumble back into the guard behind him. But Spock wasn't done. Not giving Jim a moment for recover, he took fistfuls of his shirt and pulled him up and away from the security officers and threw him towards the rail behind the captain's chair.

Jim caught himself on the rail and quickly tried to throw a punch back at the Vulcan's stomach, but it was quickly and easily blocked, along with the next three, before he received his own punch to the gut, knocking him back so hard he stumbled and almost fell over.

Around the two, people stood from their workspaces in shock, but no one knew what to do. Everyone was frozen as Spock violently continued to pummel Jim, and Jim tried desperately to block what he could.

Cali was frozen too. He couldn't get his brain to catch up as everything happened so quickly. So suddenly. He knew Jim was trying to get a rise out of Spock, but had he wanted this? Cali didn't want this! He didn't want them to fight. He didn't want Jim to get hurt. He didn't want for Spock to lose control to his powerful emotions. But he couldn't do anything. Gods help them. Please...

Everyone watched in absolute horror when Spock threw Jim onto helm control, Sulu thankfully had already stepped away, and began chocking the man. But still, no one knew what to do.

Ambassador Sarek called for his son, "Spock!" But he barely reacted, even as Jim began to turn blue.

Awoken by the ambassador's call, Cali managed to move. "Amatus." He called out as he took several long strides forward. Though his tone was soft and quiet, it was steady and enough as his voice finally gets through to Spock and snap him out of it.

Spock stopped suddenly, pulling back away from Jim as he coughs violently against the console, trying to catch his breath through his aching throat. Spock looked at what he had done in horror before looking up and meeting Cali's eyes for a moment. But that moment was enough. He had just attempted to kill the man's partner, yet past the fear, his eyes were so soft, understanding, patient. They looked so much like his mother's.

The whole toom was silent again as they watched Spock stumble away from Jim. The Vulcan couldn't look at anyone, not even as he finally spoke to Bones. "Doctor, I am no longer fit for duty. I hereby relinquish my command, based on the fact that I have been emotionally compromised. Please note the time and date in the ship's log." Cali watched helplessly as Spock makes his way off the bridge slowly, and his father followed behind silently after a moment.

"I like this ship! You know, it's exciting." The Scotsman replied in too jovial of a tone, snapping the bridge out of their stunned silence.

Bones was the first one of the crew to speak, giving Jim his usually sarcastic and disapproving look that he does when Jim has done something utterly stupid. "Well, congratulations, Jim. Now we've got no Captain and no goddamn first officer to replace him."

"Yeah we do." Jim replied smugly, smirking confidently as he settled himself into the captain's chair.

"What?"

"Pike made him first officer." Sulu informed Bones, and the rest of the bridge that were not present when Pike made his controversial decision.

"You've got to be kidding me." Bones cried out, looking to Cali for confirmation, knowing that Jim had dragged him along. Cali gave the man a tight, raised brow smile and nodded making Bones question all of his life decisions and those of Captain Pike.

"Thanks for the support."

"I sure hope you know what you're doing, Captain." Uhura said, somewhat spitefully as she passed him on her way to her station.

"So do I." Jim replied more to himself as he stared at nothing in front of him.

Cali watched him with worried eyes. He made his way to his side and placed a comforting arm on his shoulder. "Jim?" he spoke, not able to vocalise any more of his question. Which one would he even ask? Are you okay? Why did you do that? What just happened?

Jim looked up at Cali and could see all the conflict reflected in those beautiful electric blue eyes. He smiled genuinely up at him. "I'm fine, go after him."

"But—"

"Go." Jim interrupted, his tone soft and understanding. He was fine. His neck would heal. Spock needed him much more right now.

"Are you sure?" Cali asked after a moment, looking guilty for leaving him for the man that just attacked him.

"Go on angel." Jim reassured, flashing him another 'I've got this' smile before turning to the communicator on the arm of the chair. "Attention crew of the Enterprise, this is James Kirk."

Cali nodded and made his way off the bridge to find Spock, listening to Jim's announcement as he walked down the halls.

"Mister Spock has resigned commission and advanced me to Acting Captain. I know you were all expecting to regroup with fleet, but I'm ordering a pursuit course of the enemy ship to Earth. I want all departments at battle stations and ready in ten minutes. Either we're going down, or they are. Kirk out."

~~*~~

Oh my gods. That fight scene was so hard to watch. Again, I have to watch scenes over and over, pausing and rewinding, to describe them properly, but I just want them to get along. I physically flinch every time I watched that first punch. My poor babies.