Find Me on the Ice: Chapter 24

“Trey—”

Maybe I shouldn’t do this. Maybe I should go back. What about my parents? What will they think?

Coldness creeps into my awareness as I begin to wake up. The warmth I was cuddling with is now gone.

“Shh, shh. Go back to sleep. I’m just going to go to the bathroom. Everything’s okay,” Cam whispers to me as I begin to sit up.

“O-okay,” I say, my voice choppy from the dryness in my mouth.

Cam walks down the hallway toward the restroom, and I reach over and grab my water, taking desperate sips.

“Ahh,” I say, setting the bottle back down and grabbing my phone to check the time—11:33 a.m.

Cam is a bad influence on my sleep schedule.

Getting up, I fold our blankets, slip my shoes on, and grab two granola bars from my bag. I walk over to the table and take a seat to wait for Cam to get back.

But by the time I finish my granola bar, he’s still not back.

I shoot him a quick text.

Me: Did you get lost?

My heart starts to race as panic settles in. But then I hear his footsteps down the hallway and take a deep breath.

I text Chloe to give her an update.

Me: Good morning. I just woke up. How’d you sleep?

When I set my phone down, my ears prick up at something familiar. But I can’t quite place it. I freeze and listen.

All I hear is Cam walking down the hallway. Cool chills brush up my back. I don’t know why I would have this reaction.

Taking a deep breath, I realize the reason why my body is responding this way to Cam’s footsteps. Because they aren’t Cam’s at all.

“Hello, Honeybee,” Trey hums, turning the corner with a pistol in his hand.

If I wasn’t sitting at a table, I would have dropped to the ground at the sight of him after all this time.

My entire body quivers at the sound of his voice. I’ve practiced this a thousand times in my head.

. Yet, as his beady eyes stare at me, I can’t move, and I can’t breathe. It’s like his hands are still wrapped around my throat.

As hard as I tried to prepare myself for a moment like this, I have failed. I didn’t hop into action and make the first strike. I didn’t protect anyone. I’m a coward.

“Did you miss me?” Trey asks as he takes another step toward me.

He looks different, thinner but more muscular.

. His face has aged, lines streaking his forehead and the corners of his eyes.

But he’s still exactly who I remember him being. The way he carries himself and speaks, like his words are the most important ones ever to be heard.

I’ve let him belittle me too many times in my life, convince me that I am less than. But I am not the same woman he hit and abused. I am confident in who I am and in who I love.

I love Chloe for everything she has given me when I have never asked. She has cared for me in ways I can never repay. She is my best friend in the whole world. For her, I won’t cower.

I love Cam for showing me how I’m supposed to be loved. We have shown each other the darkest parts of ourselves, the pieces no one else gets to see. But instead of running from me, he embraced me and chose to love me. For Cam, I won’t cower.

I love my parents, who don’t even know the sacrifice they had to make for my safety and for their own. I love the childhood and life they gave me. They love me how every parent should love a child. For them, I won’t cower.

For myself, I won’t cower.

Despite the pain and wounds Trey had caused me, I started anew and healed myself. I found love in baking. I made friends with regular customers, proud of my work. I know that what Trey did to me was never okay, no matter how much I let him convince me of it back then.

I am Morgan Dove, and I will cower.

“No,” I snap. “I did not miss you.”

Slowly, I stand up from the table and step behind my seat. I need to find a way to get to my bag and get my gun.

He laughs and swings the pistol in his hand like a toy. “Are you ? You might want to be a little nicer to me if you know what’s good for you.”

“I know what’s good for me. You are not it,” I say with no inflection in my voice, no emotion.

“Where is Cam?” I ask.

He angrily chuckles. “Don’t worry. He’s a bit preoccupied.”

Anger radiates from me as I demand to know, “What did you do to him?”

He takes another step closer to me. “Did you fuck him, Honeybee? Did you let him touch you?”

Before I can answer, he charges toward me, rounding the table, and jabs the barrel of the gun under my chin.

He drags his nose up my neck, sniffing me. “You smell like a cheap whore. Is this ?”

Grabbing the front of Cam’s Nighthawks hoodie I’m wearing, he yanks me toward him and kicks my feet out until I’m on my knees in front of him with his gun pointed straight at me. He kneels down in front of me and brushes my hair to the side of my face with the cold barrel.

Ignoring his question, I ask mine again. “What did you do to him?”

He smiles proudly and pretends to shoot the gun, making a pew sound. “I made sure he can’t come between us anymore.”

I don’t know if I should believe him or think he’s bluffing. “I didn’t hear a shot.”

His smile widens when he hears the slight shake in my voice. “Who said I used a gun? I’m very skilled with a blade.”

My stomach twists as images of Cam bleeding out fill my sight.

I focus on the gut feeling that I know he’s still alive.

I know Trey has the capability to kill Cam. But he also craves power. He wants Cam to see him take me back. I’ve played Trey’s games long enough to know his favorite moves.

Trey presses the gun into my stomach as his forehead touches mine. “How could you do that to me? Let me think that you were dead? Do you know the pain you caused me? The years of agony I can’t get back?” His voice deepens with rage. “After all I did for you? Even now, when I tracked you down, you thank me by wearing his clothes and reeking of his scent?!”

He pulls back and slaps me across the face before gripping my jaw tightly in his grasp. Shaking slightly, he leans down.

His hand cups my breast through the hoodie, and he squeezes. I wish I could physically jump out of my skin.

His lips hover over mine, and I fight it as he squeezes harder and goes to kiss me.

But I’m no match for his strength. So, I let him kiss me. The second his lips touch mine, I thrust my mouth forward and bite his lip as hard as I can, and the metallic taste of blood explodes in my mouth.

“You bitch!” Trey rears back and stands up, backhanding me with his gun.

Warmth pools down my cheek as he grabs a fist of my hair.

“We will talk about this when we get home. I’m done dealing with this tantrum of yours.”

He leans down once more, but instead of trying to kiss me, he stares at my hair. “You dyed it.”

Gulping, I nod and smile at him. “I like it like this.”

His fist pulls my hair back, tearing pieces from my scalp. “I know you did it just to piss me off. We’ll dye it right away. This doesn’t suit you.”

He pulls me by my hair, lifting me to my feet, and walks us over to my bag. With his grip locking me at arm’s length, he digs in my bag and finds my gun. He pops the clip out and fires the gun toward the ground in case one was in the chamber. He throws the clip across the room, and it lands between some shelves.

“I knew you would have something. You’re not stupid,” he says.

He continues to drag me through the library, and I decide to stop fighting. Not because I’m giving up, but because I’m saving my energy. When we get outside, I will suck up to him, play into his needs. And then I’ll make a run for it to Susan’s. If I can get to her, I can get her gun and end this once and for all.

The entire walk to the front, I check for Cam, for any sight of what happened to him. But I don’t see anything, and worst of all, I don’t hear anything.

He kicks the door open, and I see two tools sticking out of the lock on the door.

His pickup is parked out front, and memories crash into me as fear takes over. I will die before I get into that truck. I won’t let him take me.

“I’m sorry,” I cry out as I step into the wet snow, feeling it soak into my tennis shoes.

He yanks my head back, grimacing. “You’re sorry?”

Tears stream down my face. “Yes, I’m sorry that I ran. I’m sorry that I lied to you.”

Victory twinkles in his eyes. “Continue.”

“I love you. You’re the only one who protects me and keeps me safe. I have been lost without you.” My words are toxic in my mouth.

His grasp loosens and loosens more. He cups my cheek with one hand and pushes the gun against my other cheek, holding my head in place. “I have been waiting for you to say that. I know it’s not your fault that you were resisting me in there. That boy brainwashed you. He made you think you hated me.”

I nod, and he crashes his lips onto mine, kissing me. My stomach churns at the contact.

And I make my move. Pulling my knee back, I plunge it into his groin as hard as I possibly can. He screams and falls to the ground, cupping himself.

I turn and run without looking back. I take off through the snow.

Turning the corner of the library, I see Susan’s house across the frozen lake, and I make a decision before I even allow myself to question it. I’m going across the lake, not around it. I don’t have time.

Trey’s feet pound behind me, and I dig in harder, no longer having feeling in my toes and up to my ankles.

The ice is slick, but there’s enough fallen snow for me to maintain balance as I fly across the pond.

“Come here!” Trey screams behind me.

Without looking back, I continue to race to Susan’s house. I’m halfway across the ice.

Trey tackles me, and we slide across the ice together. He wraps his hand around my throat and squeezes. I fight him, slapping and scratching his hands, arms, face, any part of him that I can reach.

“Why couldn’t you just be ?” Trey spits at me.

My vision flickers as my ears ring from a gut-wrenching sound. The ice cracks around us, and in a split second, we crash through the ice and are completely enveloped by bone-chilling water.

Our hands clash as we try to grab on to one another, desperate to get out of this dangerously cold water. We thrash, trying to hit each other anyplace we can as the surface seems to drift farther and farther out of reach.

Holding my breath, I force my eyes open in the dark abyss. Trey does the same, and I reach for his throat, but I move slower than anticipated under the water. He catches my hand and tightens his hold on the gun. He lifts it up, and I know what’s coming. An odd sense of serenity calms my body—or maybe it’s the hypothermia setting in.

Picturing the pieces of happiness in my life, I think of Chloe and her laugh, of my parents and the love they share, and of Cam, who I love so dearly. His perfectly messy brown hair and those stunning blue eyes stole my fucking heart. I’m so lucky to have been loved by him for the short time we had.

.

I don’t want it to be over. I don’t want everything to change to the past tense. I don’t want people to say, I don’t want my life to end by his hand. I strike, and for once in my life, I don’t hesitate. As he lifts the gun higher, I reach for it and grab the top of the barrel with my right hand and his wrist with my left.

I pinch his wrist. His grip loosens, and I pull the pistol free.

My tears mix with the water as my air runs out. I turn the gun on Trey as my chest feels like it’s going to cave in on itself, and as I meet Trey’s now-fearful stare, I fire the gun until it won’t fire anymore.

He tries to say something, but nothing leaves his parted lips. I hold his gaze, watching the animation fade from his eyes before he sinks, deeper and deeper below.

My lungs are . I look up and see a spot in the ice where it looks brighter than the surrounding area, and I swim toward it. My body is completely numb. I can’t even feel the cold anymore as I near the ice.

Breaking the surface of the water, I gasp for air and throw my arms onto the snowy ice.

When I brace my weight on my arms, the ice breaks more, plunging me back into the cold.

.

Looking around, I see Susan’s house and remember a story she once told me. How she got out of the broken ice when she was younger. Closing my eyes, I calm my mind and my breathing, trying not to panic. And I follow the same steps she did.

Placing my arms on the ice, I fill my lungs and lift my legs up until I’m almost horizontal with the ice. With all of my remaining energy, I kick with my legs in short and fast movements. Propelling myself further onto the ice, I kick harder until my knees are out of the water.

Taking a deep breath, I hold it and carefully roll away toward Susan’s until I’m a good ten feet away from the hole. Gently, I rise to my feet and take light steps, carefully making my way toward her house.

My hands and body are shaking so horribly. I didn’t even realize it until right now. My steps slow, and my legs quiver as I near the edge of the lake.

But as my foot takes my next step, my knee buckles, and I fall to the solid ice, my eyes fluttering shut. I’m exhausted. I just need to rest for a second before continuing. Then, I can get to her house, and she’ll get help.

But when my head touches down on the ice, everything goes black.