Chapter 33

Chapter 33

Tears of Pain

My hand pressed against the wall as I stood near to the door of a room inside the apartment. The smell of blood and ash quickly filled the air. I tried to stop the tears from spilling anymore, but they continued. My chest became tight at the thoughts running in my head. It terrified me to know anyone could do anything, whenever they wanted.

What was going to become of me?

Nicholas stepped inside and appeared in front of me before I had the chance to cover my emotions. His hands pressed on either side of my cheek as his eyes fell over my face. I no longer saw the darkness I had seen within them moments ago.

It was all gone.

"What are you crying for?" He asked, nearing me while thumb ran across my cheek, erasing any tears and smearing blood, blood of the same man that he had killed, for me.

"Nothing." I murmured, pursuing my lips and shaking my head.

"There's nothing to fear, devil." His voice deepened as he lowered his head, near to mine.

Blood pounded in my ears, and my lips parted. He closed the gap between us and pressed his mouth against mine. My heart skipped a beat. I kissed him back, and shut my eyes tight. His hands moved my cheeks, cupping them gently while mouth savored mine. A moment passed, I didn't want it to end, but it did.

"No one's going to hurt you, ever."

I looked up, unknown of whether to believe him or hot. My heart beat frantically, trying to wonder what was behind his words, behind his eyes. His behaviour tonight had left me confused yet again. It was a reflection of his feelings for me, his desire to protect me.

But why? What had he seen in me that he hadn't seen in other?

His hands moved away from my face and he said, "Now, come on, I need some help."

"You're sick, Nicholas." I blurted out, not knowing what I had just stated.

The corner of his mouth lifted into a smile, "I am, but don't tell me you wouldn't have done any different if you held the same powers as me." He rolled a piece of my hair between his fingers before sliding it back, over my shoulders.

I breathed out, and looked away, unable to answer him.

I walked with him back outside and found the dead man's body wrapped up in a thin piece of cloth, a sheet of sorts. His blood had smeared nearly everywhere he had been beaten up. I pushed away any guilt that formed inside me. The ends of my sleeves went up to my face to wipe the blood Nicholas had left on me.

It stained, but I didn't bother much.

"Keep the door open for me." He said, crouching beside the body.

I neared to the main door of the apartment and opened it wide while he picked the body and threw it over his shoulders without any hesitation. His strength portrayed as he carried the body outside of the apartment. I walked behind him and closed the door before rushing ahead and pressing the button of the elevator.

"Are you going to bury him?" I asked, out of curiosity.

"Yes."

"Why?" My brows furrowed.

Who'd kill someone and then bury them? Only a mad man.

"Because even after what he had done, he died being a wolf of my pack, and all my wolves get buried. Leaving them on land or to rot will never allow them to find peace." He explained.

I tried to make sense of it, but it meant nothing.

"What about your pack wolves that die elsewhere, in another pack?"

"They get bought back home. Always."

A shudder ran down my spine as the elevator tinged and reached the floor we were on. I stepped in first and he followed. The doors shut and we defended down in nothing but silence. On the side of the buttons panel, there was a small glass which showed my reflection.

Hideous.

I looked away before I could stare at myself for long.

The elevator reached the lobby and we headed out. Cold clung onto my skin as we stepped outside into the night. Nicholas walked over to his car and shoved the body inside the trunk before opening the door for me.

"I can drop you home if you want." He suggested, standing tall as I sat inside the car.

I pulled my legs together and settled, "I'm fine."

My thoughts seized as he came inside the car and started the engine. Driving out of the building, he headed east, straight into empty yet familiar areas of the town. As it was getting late, there were lesser cars on the road and less people walking on the pavements. Taking a left, he entered the graveyard I had been to before.

It wasn't too long ago I came here searching for my mother's bracelet after he had nearly buried me.

He parked the car a small distance away from the dug up grounds and stepped out. I followed him in the cold, curious to know what he did with his men after killing them. The trunk opened, he carried the body over his shoulder before walking further into the graveyard.

I swallowed hard, keeping my fear at bay.

What could I even fear anymore? There were monsters all around me.

The atmosphere of the large graveyard was similar to death. The smell of bones rotting and the sounds of the crows loudly cawing reached me. Fog billowed from several directions, making the graveyard unclear. I followed him closely, not wanting to get lost in this place.

I had gotten lost the time I came here to find my mother's bracelet and it was somewhat terrifying.

He stopped near an empty grave and placed the body beside it, still over the ground. There wasn't just one dug up grave, but several. Many. It surprised me. The empty graves were scattered all around the graveyard, waiting to be filled with a dead body.

"How many do you even kill?" I asked as the wind whistled behind me.

"I don't kill many," He worked on the body, unwrapping the sheet from him and baring him so the soil and dirt could rest over his flesh, so he'd get to know death. "Many of my men die everyday, either in battle or from their previous injuries, but they do die. It's not something I can stop."

His head lowered before he picked the body from the ground and placed it inside the grave. It went six feet deep, at the bottom before Nicholas began to toss the soil back on it, filling it up, burying the man he had killed.

I wasn't sure if I was terrified, or—

"You were going to kill me to. Why didn't you?" I asked, folding my arms across my chest.

He glanced at me from his shoulder, but didn't say anything until the ground was flattened. He rose up and tossed aside the shovel before nearing me.

He stared at me. "Do you want to die?"

"Why do you care for me?" I returned his stare and questioned. "I wouldn't be here if you didn't."

"That's right, you wouldn't be here." He stepped closer, eyes darkening under the moonlight while his jaw became tight. Shadows outlined his facial features and the scars of his face became more prominent.

I lifted my chin, looking up at him. "Why am I here? Why do you care for me, Nicholas? Why would you kill someone for me?" My lashes fell above my eyes, blurring my vision, but I didn't look away. My curiosity furthered, my mind heading into a direction it should never go. "Is there something—"

"There's nothing," His hand slipped in the back of my head, holding me stiffly before he pulled me closer to him. "Nothing."

I pressed my hand against his shirt, my fingers curling around his collar as I watched his face and the tension grow over it. He sniffed me. A deep breaths filled up my lungs as my brows began to close.

"You can smell me, Nicholas. I don't have a wolf—no one can smell me," I stated, keeping my voice low as it could get. A pulse appeared in my throat as I continued even when his eyes warned me not to go there. How could I? "Am I your mate?"

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