11

I guess it's now or never, Farren thought to himself, closing his eyes. God, why was Kaden so damn persistent.

"Okay Farren I thought it was just a little bit of girl drama but now your kinda starting to worry me." He reopened his eyes to find Kaden staring at him expectantly.

"Sorry, it's just a long story." He said, ruffling a hand through his hair. "Also, nice to know that you worry about me," he smirked, and to his surprise Kaden just winked back suggestively. Okay then.

The air became more serious and Farren decided that now was the time. Releasing a breath he didn't know he was holding, he began. "I wasn't being entirely truthful. The reason I'm not sleeping isn't because there's a lot on my mind. It's because I can't really, well at least not for very long."

He met Kaden's eyes and noticed they were filled with confusion. "I'm not sure I follow."

"I have insomnia." He clarified. "It's after improving a lot from when I was younger, but even at that I rarely sleep every night of a whole week, and on the times that I do it's never really more than a couple of hours per night. It started when my parents died, back when I first moved in with Grace and Jenny. They died on a boating accident, and I was there too. I saw them die." He shuddered, even thinking about it made him feel sick. Over time the memory had faded, mainly as a result of him suppressing it.

Hee forced himself to continue. There was no backing down now.

"After that, I started having nightmares. They got so bad that I sort of trained myself to stop sleeping. I didn't want to tell Grace and Jenny, they had already done so much for me and I didn't want to worry them or be a burden to them. And since then, I guess I just haven't been able to sleep properly.

He looked up to find the other boy looking at him with concern. "And the pills?" Kaden asked, finding his voice.

"They're sort of like stress relief." He clarified. "They're supposed to help with the nightmares. But I still can't fall asleep. It's like, all those years I spent training myself not to sleep, I just can't do it anymore."

He could see a million questions whizzing around Kaden's head. "How are you so.. awake all the time? You play football, for god's sake! And your grades are good. How do you do it?" Kaden asked, breaking the silence, his words coming out in a jumbled rush that took Farren a moment to decipher.

"I don't know man. Sometimes I feel like I'm just going to drop dead. I take meds though, for energy. And I'm on antidepressants. I mean we've tried everything else, sleep therapy, sleeping pills, all that. But the therapy didn't work, and the pills had majorly bad side effects."

Farren didn't know what possessed him to open up to Kaden. I mean, he'd only properly known the boy for a week. Even if it felt like so much longer. He supposed it was because they were spending all their time together, night and day, apart from during school and training.

Normally, when you know someone for a week, you might only spend a couple of hours with them over the course of the week, if even. This was different

Kaden broke the silence, snapping him out of his reverie. "Oh God man, I don't know what to say." He said, his usual arrogance dissipated.

"You don't need to say anything."

"I know. But I'm sorry. About you parents and for being an awkward fuck." He laughed awkwardly. "Are you okay?"

Are you okay.

Three words. Three simple words, but that was all it took. Something snapped inside Farren, and he felt a wave of emotions wash over him. The air suddenly became so much thicker, and he felt his throat constricting. He wasn't okay. He knew that. He was exhausted, drained. It was gradually getting to his head, the tiredness, and it was really impacting him, more than he let on. He just felt so defeated, all of the time. The antidepressants really helped, but sometimes his mind just got the better of him.

"Farren..?"

He looked up, meeting the other boy's brilliant light blue eyes which were currently filled with worry, before answering.

"No. I'm not okay. I'm just so fucking tired." He admitted, finally breaking down. His voice cracked at the end, and the tears he had fought to keep back were threatening to resurface.

God, he was such a baby.

But he didn't have time to dwell on that fact because he felt the couch shift and suddenly a pair of strong arms wrapped around him, before he could even realise what was the happening.

Wait a minute.. was Kaden hugging him?

He hesitated for a moment, before deciding to just give his body what it clearly wants, leaning in closer to Kaden.

He took in their current position. They were sat with their bodies facing eachother on the couch. Kaden's arms were wrapped around his shoulders, and his rested loosely against Kaden's waist.

The feel of Kaden's hot breath on his neck sent shivers down his spine, shivers that he chose to ignore. He nuzzled his face deeper into the crook of Kaden's neck, breathing in the smell of coffee. Funny, he never noticed Kaden was a coffee drinker.

For a moment he was sure he felt Kaden tense at his action.

But before he dwell on it further, Kaden's arms unwrapped themselves from his chest. Farren suddenly felt so much colder, without Kaden's warmth enveloping him.

He looked up to see Kaden staring at him intently, unreadable emotions swirling around them brilliant blue irises. He felt a blush spread across his face, and at that moment was eternally grateful for his naturally tan skin for helping conceal the redness.

He felt at loss for words, on one hand not wanting to break this moment, but on the other hand needing to say something before the silence became uncomfortable.

"Thanks. For listening." Was all he could muster up the strength to say. But Kaden seemed to understand, nodding back at him.

"Anytime."

And it was that simple word that, as Farren headed back into bed that night with Kaden close behind him, sent him into a deep sleep for which he had been craving for so long.

XXXXX

Kaden was, for perhaps the first and last time since he had arrived at the Milton household, awake before Farren.

As he looked over at the other boy's sleeping form, he couldn't help but feel slightly sorry for him, much as he knew Farren would hate that.

He took in Farren's usually sharp features, softer now that he was asleep. The deep breaths Farren was taking almost soothed Kaden back into his own sleep. Almost, but not quite.

He was so focused on Farren's muscled shoulders peeking out from the top of the duvet, that he didn't notice that his deep breaths had ceased.

"Enjoying the view?" Farren snorted cheekily, opening his eyes.

Kaden, who hadn't realised the other boy had woken, nearly jumped out of his skin in shock. He turned red, hastily looking away.

Wait what the fuck. Was he actually blushing?

Blushing?

Since when the fuck did he get embarrassed. He may have been caught in the act of staring, but who gives a fuck.

"But of course," he retorted slyly, regaining his composure. He saw surprise flash across Farren's features, as he too sat up in the bed.

They sat, one at either end of the bed, facing each other.

"Pervert." Farren fired back.

"Twat."

"Prick."

Knowing that he should just stop now before they started an insult competition that would surely span hours, Kaden just laughed in reply.

A moment later, much to his obvious attempt not to, Farren too started to laugh.

"What do you want to do today?" Asked Farren, once the boys had settled back into a comfortable silence.

"We can just hang out, I suppose." He replied, trying to focus his attention on anything other than the way Farren's arm muscles flexed when he stretched.

Farren rolled his eyes in mock contempt. "Oh yay. Lucky me." He sighed, earning him a glare from Kaden.

"You're gonna have a blast Farry, don't worry." He shot back.

"Don't call me Farry."

"Okay. Farry."

"You make me sound like I'm eight years old."

"At last. An age to match your physical appearance." Kaden fired back.

Honestly, these quick witted conversations were becoming such a common occurrence between them that he hardly had to think of insults anymore, they just came so naturally.

"Hey, you didn't seem to mind my 'physical appearance' when you were perving on me this morning." Farren taunted smugly.

Kaden fought vigorously, and successfully, to hold back his blush. "Don't get ahead of yourself Milton." He smirked in reply.

"Don't worry Rivers, I forgive you. With a body like this, how could anyone not stare?" Farren joked back, feigning arrogance.

"If your head gets any bigger, it might just explode." Kaden replied with a small laugh.

"As long as it gets on you." Farren replied.

"Kinky." Winked Kaden, laughing when Farren began sputtering.

"Your such a pervert."

"So you've said."

"Fuck you Kaden." Farren replied, standing up out of the bed.

"You wish." Kaden replied, losing his composure at the sight of Farren standing before him. Wearing nothing but boxer shorts.

He struggled to keep his gaze focused on the bed, as Farren grabbed clothes from the wardrobe and headed to the bathroom.

God those back muscles were to die for.

It was only when he heard the shower start in the en suite bathroom that he could let out the breath he didn't know he was holding.

Groaning, he shoved his head on his hands. This little.. crush he seemed to be fast developing on Farren was rapidly getting out of hand. If he wasn't careful, Farren would surely start to notice.

Grabbing his own clothes from the drawers that Jenny and Grace had allocated him, he made his way to the shower down the hall.

All this thinking and worrying about Farren was frying his brain and if he didn't get over it soon he was bound to do something he regretted.

All these weird feelings were clouding his judgement.

***

Kaden took in the warm sunny day as him and Farren left the house. It was days like this that really made him glad he lived in Sinclair.

The boys had decided, or rather Grace had decided for them, that some fresh air was precisely what they needed to get over their tiredness.

So here Kaden found himself, sitting into Farren's car and heading for the local soccer pitch.

"Have you got the water?" Farren asked him, ducking into the car and turning on the air conditioner.

"Yup." Kaden replied, motioning to the two litre bottles stacked on the floor at his feet.

Farren just nodded in reply, before starting the car and pulling out of the drive way. The soccer pitch was about a ten minute drive away, but they had to stop and collect Jesse and Luke too.

Kaden rested his head on the window, the cold glass cooling him down. He was surprisingly not that tired, considering his late night and the fact that he woke before ten on a Sunday for perhaps the first time in his life.

"Hey Kaden?" Farren cleared his throat awkwardly, pulling Kaden out of his thoughts.

"Yes Farren?" He replied, sitting up straight and turning to focus his attention on the other boy.

Farren coughed awkwardly again, and Kaden had to admit he was becoming slightly worried.

He was about to speak again when Farren cut him off. "I just want to say thanks." He said, and Kaden could see that Farren was making an intense effort to focus his eyes on the road. "For last night," continued Farren, "I'm sorry I was such an emotional wreck."

At that moment, all Kaden wanted to do was grab Farren in his arms and hug him. And never let him go. But he resisted, because now was not the time.

It was never the right time, considering Farren was straighter than a pole.

Farren opened his mouth the continue, but Kaden cut him off before he had the chance.

"Farren stop." He interjected, "don't worry about it. We're friends now, and friends are there for each other." He stated firmly.

Farren tore his eyes off the road as he pulled into Jesse's house and shot him a grateful look. "Thanks." He replied, staring Kaden straight in the eye so he knew that he meant it.

Kaden stared back, momentarily at a loss for words. In that moment, something changed in the car. It suddenly became intense, so intense that Kaden was afraid to break the stare. The two just sat there staring at eachother, as Kaden struggled to form a coherent response.

At this stage they had parked outside Jesse's house and before Kaden had time to reply the car doors at the back flung open. Luke and Jesse clambered in, clearly unaware that they had interrupted something that could only be described as a moment.

As soon as the boys opened the doors, Kaden and Farren snapped out of their trance immediately. Trying to control the raging feelings in his stomach, Kaden turned to greet the two boys. As did Farren.

They pulled out of the house, Jesse and Luke in the backseat nattering on about something or other. Kaden attempted to join in on their conversation, as did Farren, but couldn't concentrate on what they talked about.

And as he glanced at Farren from the corner of his eye, he noticed that Farren too was acting slightly as if he was in some sort of trance. Off on his own world. Deep in the thought. The air between the two of them was filled with confusion.

If only Farren felt it too.

XXXXX

VCF!!:) hope yall enjoyed!

Qotc; Favourite food?

Aotc; Pasta *sighs in awe*

-A