12. Living Conditions

Chapter 12: Living Conditions

Mika

The stupid lock was refusing to let me in. Again. God, I fucking hated this place. I hated how shitty it was, and that I wasn't allowed to fix anything up myself or risk being kicked out for 'damages'. I wasn't sure how replacing a doorknob was damaging the place, but yet, I still wasn't allowed to do that.

After struggling for way longer than I should have under the single flickering street lamp, the lock gave way and let me open the door. Except now it wouldn't let go of the damn key.

"Meeks!"

I groaned loudly at the sound of his voice, my frustration coming out when I pulled on the key and it came straight out of the lock. At least he was good for something.

"Mika! Thank god."

I turned around slowly to see Zak running down the street towards me. He stopped at the bottom of the four steps that led up to my front door, panting to try and catch his breath. I hadn't seen in him a few months, and he'd let his beard grow out a bit. I have to say I liked the look, although I couldn't stand him anymore. Maybe I'll tell Allen to grow a beard.

"You never came back here last night," he said, sounding strangely worried considering we were nothing to each other and I had no desire to ever update him on what I'm doing.

"Have you been stalking me?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest. How else would he know I wasn't here? And why did he even care?

"No. No of course not. Meeks. I've been looking for you. I... I need you, Mika. I do. Please. Just give me a few minutes to talk to you."

"There's nothing to talk about!" I nearly shouted. Why couldn't this guy just leave me alone? "We barely had anything together, and there never will be anything between us! Can't you understand that?"

He stormed up the four steps to stand only inches away from me, determination in his eyes. "That's the thing about love, Mika. It makes a person irrational. I still love you, no matter how much you try to ignore me. I can't get you out of my head."

I slowly inhaled, focusing my attention on closing my front door instead of on Zak. My landlord would throw a fit if she saw it open like it was, complaining about letting the heat out that barely even worked. I never knew when she would stop by, so, other than it being a means to ignore Zak another moment, I didn't need to worry about her too.

I exhaled in one long sigh, raising my eyes to meet his hopeful ones. "You don't fucking matter to me, Zak," I hissed out, seriously pissed that he actually thought he could have me. I wasn't sure how much longer I would be able to handle him doing this. "Not one bit. Get that through your thick skull and leave me the hell alone."

Turns out, my patience was completely up. He had leaned over and planted his lips against mine, in one last effort to make me give in to him. I didn't. Instead, I socked him straight in the jaw.

I watched as he took a step back, obviously not expecting to get punched. His foot caught the edge of the top step and he tumbled backwards, landing hard on the sidewalk. He looked up at me, not yet standing up although it didn't look like he was hurt at all - pity. But I think he finally got the message to stay away from me.

"Mika?"

I turned at the sound of Allen's voice to see him hurrying over, Sam in his arms. I threw my arms out to the side as he came to a stop next to Zak, who was now eyeing up Allen.

"What the hell are you doing here, Allen?" I asked. "I told you not to come here!"

"Who the fuck are you?" Zak demanded before Allen had a chance to say anything, getting to his feet. "Can't you see he doesn't want you here?"

I scoffed as Allen answered. "I could say the same thing about you. Keep your hands off my boyfriend, because obviously he's not interested in you."

Zak started laughing. It was the type of laugh that started out as a small chuckle, but soon grew until he couldn't control it any longer, having to bend over in order to catch his breath when he calmed himself down a minute or two later.

"God, you're funny," Zak said, standing back up straight with the shake of his head. "Mika? Boyfriend? Yeah, right. Mika doesn't do boyfriends. Nice try, big guy. And what's with the kid? Mika doesn't do kids either. He can't stand kids, and I should know that because I know Mika well enough to know that he'll be mine sooner than he thinks."

Okay. That was it. I practically jumped down the steps, getting right up into Zak's face. "You don't know shit about me and you never will."

Suddenly, the sound of gunshots rang out across the clear night. I didn't pay much attention to them, neither did Zak, both of us too used to hearing it night after night. But I noticed Allen stiffen next to me, and we all noticed Sam start crying.

I turned to tell Allen that this is why he shouldn't have brought Sam here, when the baby reached his arms out towards me for comfort, rather than his own father. In a silent exchange, Allen handed me his son, who immediately pressed his face into my shoulder and stopped crying as I gently rubbed his back. Zak, who had stood there watching us, just shook his head, not saying anything as he started walking away from us.

"I don't like him," Allen said, reminding me why exactly I was standing outside my house at this time of night.

I looked at him. "Why are you even here, Allen? I told you it was too dangerous, especially for Sam." I sighed. "You know what? Just come in. You're already here, we might as well not keep standing out here."

He nodded and followed me up the steps and into my little apartment. It was pretty much just one large room - a stove, refrigerator, and a shitty microwave made up most of the kitchen's corner, a mattress was in the back corner against the wall, the sheets tossed in a pile at the end of it because I wasn't expecting anyone to come over today so I didn't make it, a table with two chairs was next to the bed, and a small couch stood before a TV that I'm pretty sure no longer worked, although I haven't tried using it in close to a year. In the fourth corner was a small room that was the bathroom. I was constantly grateful that it had it's own room, and not just a toilet and a shower in the middle of the place.

Allen had stopped walking just inside the door to look around the small place while I grabbed a blanket off my bed and laid it on the cold floor in front of the couch for Sam to sit on. Once I handed him a spoon to keep him occupied, because that's the only toy I had for him in this place, I looked at Allen.

"Not nearly as nice as yours, you don't need to say it," I said. "But what made you come here?"

He pulled my phone out of his pocket. "You left this. Thought you might need it."

I sighed. "I'm going to be back at your house tomorrow. It could have waited. You know that. So what's the real reason you came?"

He stepped forward so that he was standing right in front of me. "Sammy missed you," he said in almost a whisper.

I smirked. "Yeah? Or did Allen miss me?"

To answer me, he pressed his lips softly against mine. After a moment, he broke the kiss, but didn't back up at all. "I never want anyone to kiss you again, unless it's me. I'm glad you punched him, though, or else I would have."

I shifted my weight back to look at him. "I never thought I'd like the whole possessively-jealous thing in a guy. Turns out it's really hot when it's you."

Allen kissed me again, lifting me up. I wrapped my arms and my legs around him to hold on, kissing him back just as heated as he walked us over to my bed. As soon as my back hit the mattress, I broke the kiss off, remembering.

"Your son is watching us," I said, although it came out more as a moan since he chose that moment to reach his hand into my pants and grab hold of me.

"He doesn't know anything," Allen replied, kissing my neck. And with that, I forgot all about Sam.

Some time later, Allen flopped down on the mattress next to me, both of us out of breath, but feeling too good at the moment to care. Just as he wrapped his arms around me to pull me closer to him, my stomach grumbled softly, yet Allen heard it anyway.

He chuckled. "Have you eaten anything tonight?"

"Aside from that muffin you gave me, no. I only just got home, and then someone convinced me into bed."

He nodded his head before shifting me off his chest to sit up. "I haven't eaten either," he said, ignoring my last comment. "Do you want to order something?"

I thought for a minute, not yet moving from this position. "I have leftovers in the fridge I was going to eat last night. They need to get eaten soon. There should be enough for both of us, if you don't mind?"

He leaned down to give me a quick kiss. "Sounds perfect."

I watched him as he got up from the mattress and pulled his boxers on. It was weird, this whole situation, and I wasn't sure if I was used to it, the whole boyfriend thing. It was weird that after having sex, we would get up and make dinner, well, heat up leftovers out of my fridge. It was weird that I was happy being with Allen like this, not even the sex, but being in the same room, talking about dinner plans. It was nice.

"What are you thinking about?"

I moved my gaze to Allen, who had gotten dressed at some point while I was lost in my head. "Nothing." It was all I said as I crawled to the edge of the bed, where my tub full of clothes were to grab a fresh pair of underwear. I was not about to put on the same pair as earlier.

"You keep your clothes in there?"

I looked up, closing the lip to the tub. "Yeah. Where else would I put them? I don't exactly have a closet."

He looked around, as he just realizing my lack of closet space, while I pulled my clothes on. "You didn't get this place with the salary I'm paying you, did you? Because I really thought you'd be able to afford better."

I scoffed, heading over to the kitchen area. "Yeah, no. I've been here for years." I pulled a couple containers out of the fridge and placed them on the counter. Holding up the top one, I looked at him and asked, "Baked chicken okay?"

Allen was just bending over to pick up Sam off the floor, who had fallen asleep at some point. "Sounds good." He then placed Sam on the couch and laid the blanket from the floor over top him before walking over to me. "What about your plan to move out of here? Didn't you mention that once?"

I didn't say anything as I plated both of our meals before sticking one of the plates in the microwave. I didn't want to admit to him why I was saving all my money. It was a stupid idea and I didn't want him to judge me for it.

"Am I not allowed to change my mind?" I said once the microwaved beeped for the first plate.

Allen shrugged, handing me the second plate once I took out the first. "Just wondering why you'd stay here."

I smirked. "What? Don't like my home?"

He faltered a minute with his words. "I didn't say that. Uh, it's... it's nice."

"It's not nice, Allen, just admit it. I know you're thinking it."

He shrugged again, not giving me an actual answer. "Why don't you move out though? I mean, what changed your mind?"

I shook my head, taking the second plate out of the microwave and setting it at the table with the other one. "Let's talk about something else."

We ended up falling silent for the next few minutes while we started eating before Allen spoke up. "This is amazing, Mika. I didn't know you could cook this well. You should be doing this for a living, not watching my kid. Seriously."

"I asked you to talk about something else," I muttered, not realizing exactly what he said. As soon as the words registered though, my eyes snapped up to his.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

I sighed, looking down at my food so I didn't have to see his face when I told him the truth. "That's why I'm still in this shit hole. I'm saving money to pay for cooking school, once I finish getting my GED."

I hadn't even told him how I was taking online courses during the days to get my GED. It was something I started a couple months ago, figuring I should decide on a direction to take my life. I wasn't going to babysit Sam forever, and then what? And now that I was actually dating Allen, he might still be in the picture when Sam gets older, but I couldn't just rely on him for the rest of my life. I needed to do something, especially if Allen and I don't work out, which is probably more likely than us working.

"I think that's a great idea," Allen said, breaking through my thoughts. "You'll be an amazing chef if you can already cook like this."

"You think so?" I lifted my gaze to see him smiling at me.

"I know so. And," he paused for a second. "If that's why you're still here, why don't you just move in with me?"