Chapter-9

I keep tossing on my bed.I am feeling very anxious about tommorow .I am going to upset her , tommorow for the first time my jaan , my baby was going to meet me but I have to do this for us ,I know I am doing wrong but I don't have any other choice. I have to make her upset but I earn her forgiveness ,she has become my everything I want her heck i need her.

I stoop up and went towards my study . Aakash words are still ringing in my head.I got to know that Aarushi's family has connections with royal family in past that's why they are not ready for Aarushi's marriage with me.Aarushi's late bua whose name is Aditi got married to Arjun Rathore ,brother of bade papa and unfortunately my–my father.

Mrs Aditi got married to Arjun Rathore but she committed suicide after she got to know about Arjun affair with Nisha(Abhimanyu real mother). She loved him alot.Arjun didn't inform her family about her suicide and got married to Nisha after one week only and when her family got to know about this they got shocked and devasted by this news.

Aarushi's grandfather got angry when he came to know that his dear daughter who fought everyone to get married with Arjun committed suicide and no one even bother to tell them about their daughter death.He came to ask answers to Arjun but he killed him and no one can even ask anything to him because of his position.

He blackmailed Aarushi's family to keep their mouth shut and leave from Rajasthan.No one came to know about his deeds ,that's why Aarushi's family don't believe any royal and don't want to have any relation with royals because of him they lost their family members.

I can't believe he is my father ,I always wished I was never born but now I want to live with her ,I want to know how it feels to be with her in arms ,to make her smile,to make her happy ,to be the one she can depend on.

My parents were never good parents for me. He destroyed many lives and after that he destroyed my life. He became king of Rajasthan ,he was always greedy for power and bade papa don't want to take throne,that's why my grandparents decided to let him take throne.

Bade papa always want to be a buisnessman ,he want to take RR enterprises to next level that's why he was not here ,he went abroad.

When Arjun got married to Mrs Aditi(Aarushi's late bua) ,bade papa was not here because of badi ma health condition, badi ma diagnosed with tumor that time and he distanced himself from everyone and took care of her. They both didn't came here to attend marriage,badi ma was priority for bade papa he didn't paid attention to anything else than her.

They got to know about Aditi death and everything after one year when they return to rajasthan. Arjun told everyone that Aditi got into accident no one knows that she committed suicide in our family.

Bade papa and badi ma till now don't know that Aditi committed suicide , they thinks that  my grandparents forced Arjun to get married again .He don't want to get married again after aditi but have to because of my grandparents pressure for marriage .Such a cunning dog he is

Arjun continued using his power and fulfilling his greed,he is such a bastard.I hate him to the core of my heart for everything he did to me.When bade papa got to know about Arjun's plan of transferring all legacy and property to himself,he took the throne from him and he became king himself against his dreams and wish for our legacy and people welfare.

After taking all powers from arjun ,bade papa still let us live with them in palace.I was a kid ,i also crave for their love and care but all I got is their anger and disgust. He and his wife lost their mind after everything was taken away from them.

He and his wife used to beat me ,starve me and lock me in rooms . They never showed any care of even humanity to me. I used to hate everything,this world ,all these people ,no one was their when I needed them i used to cried all night.

They used to beat me ,always saying that I was a bad omen because of me they lost their everything,their power money. That time i realised the real power of money. If you have power and money you can rule anyone , everyone runs behind money.You know world is ruled by power and power is obtained by money.

They always beat me saying I am powerless,bad omen or what not and I can't even able to do anything,I can't able to save me. I decided at that time ,that one day I will earn  so much money and power so no one will able to lay a finger on me.

One day bade papa and badi ma came to know about all this when Arjun and his wife were torturing me and they started arguing on something which caused Arjun to stab his wife.He killed her in front of me ,I was their watching everything and screaming. Bade papa admitted Arjun in mental hospital when he got to know about his mental condition.

I was traumatized for months and someone  suggested bade papa to send me to hostel  so that I can complete my studies and  change of environment will also help me.I went to hostel and everything came back on track but I lost myself in this. I used to cry silently all night ,I can't even able to sleep till now peacefully. I got insomniac,nothing helps me to sleep more than two hours.

Today I have everything power and money. I can have anything I want but I don't have myself. I lost my every emotion, I lost my smile, happiness,my peace.I just hate unwanted people presence ,i hate when someone speaks alot in front of me ,I hate when people try to cling to me. I don't believe in love and anything because why someone will love you if your parents ,your mother who gave you birth can do this to you ,what can you expect from others.

I met Rudra in hostel ,he always try to befriend with me even after i don't show any interest and say anything to him.He used to came to me and celebrate with me and also force me to be with me. I used to get irritated from him for some months but eventually I started liking his presence even if I don't say that he is my friend ,he knows I care for him because I didn't kill him till now. I don't stand unwanted people presence and he is safe that means I accepted him as my friend.

We completed our school and graduation together and eventually we came along . He always there for me but still I didn't share my childhood to him ,he knows something happened with me and because of that I am like this.

He used to come and sit beside me quietly when I used to avoid all party and gatherings in my teenage and when ever He got into any problem I used to solve his problems. He never used to behave like a good and obedient kid,he used to struck in some problems everyday.

He is not a bad person but still it didn't mean that I can bear his presence, he rant alot,more than my liking.

When I return to rajasthan I started working in RR enterprises and after some years I took over ceo position. I distanced myself from everyone,I just busied myself in work and earning achievements and taking RR enterprises to next level. Badi ma always tries to make me close to family but I just can't do that. I don't like all these things .

I am really thankful of bade papa and badi ma for helping me ,from saving all those tortures but I don't think I can be like little Abhimanyu again who have different hopes and happiness in his life.

I always work so much because I don't want to give my mind any time to think about those dreadful memories. I works alot so that I can sleep for time after exhausting myself and my mind can't able to think about those memories. Now it becomes m schedule.I got habituated with it and i liked my own privacy any my own controlled life.

At first I used to cry but after some time I stopped crying as no one care for me ,no one was their to listen about me.I buried my all emotions and pain inside. I always questioned myself why am I crying ,does anyone care ,no one even want to know about you .Why do you want care ,why do you want love ,why do you want empathy ,you can live without all these things ,you don't want anyone shoulder ,you can bear all this.

I buried my all pain inside and lived my all life like this.I stopped crying ,i also stopped showing love and care to anyone.

I released a sigh thinking all this.i buried my face between my hand and took deep breaths.I used to think that  I don't have any heart ,I stopped showing kindness to anyone but when I saw her ,I first time feel flattering inside my chest. My heart started beating rapidly. I sleep that night peacefully thinking about her. I need her heck i will go mad without her. It's driving me crazy ,she is in my mind 24/7. I crave for her ,I want her attention ,I want to be her only. I can't able to think anything else than her and when I don't think about her I can't able to think sane. "Jaan I love you so much ,I am really sorry in advance for hurting you but I–I want you ,I love you like a crazy person please forgive me.I will love you with my everything bacche,can you also  love me back one day ,please? " I said looking at her photo.

I went towards my locker and took out a sketch notebook. I shuffled through her sketches which I used to sketch in nights whenever I used to miss her alot ,when I can't able to think sane ,when I can't able to sleep ,when I can't able to stop my childhood memories. I always sketch her with utmost care and love,I don't want any mistake in her peaceful and beautiful presence.

I took a pencil and started sketching her.She is the only one ,who can keep in my sanity ,who can bring peace in my life. I skecthed her new photo which she posted on her story one day ago.She was looking like an angel in blue kurti ,denim high waist jeans , oxidised jhumka and silver bangles. She had minimal makeup on.

The way she was looking at sky ,her eyes showing happiness. She was smiling so beautifully,I wish she would look at me like that one day.

I completed my creation and looked at  it . She always look so beautiful. Just by looking at her a smile came on my lips. She is everything yaar . She is love , my love,my jaan,my baby,my peace ,my breath ,my everything.

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Hey, everyone. How's it ?

Do you like it ?

Our Abhimanyu is obsessed with Aarushi and let me tell you one thing *shh* 🤫 –i love obsessed man ,I love when they claim how much they crave for your existence,how much they want you.

Thank you

Love you🎀✨