FIFTEEN

TW: This chapter contains emotional abuse, homophobia, and depictions of physical abuse

♥ Lucille ♥

I'm preparing an appetizer platter of crackers and cheese. It was always my mother's go-to when it came to get-togethers, because she can't cook. And neither can I.

Kiara is lifting up her phone every 5 seconds to see if her mother has texted that she's here yet. I still don't get why Kiara is letting this happen at all. I brought myself to Google last night, asking why someone would be willing to/want to see their abusive parent. I had to type it a few different ways to get an actual answer, but the answer I found made me sad.

According to Law.com, it could be attachment issues. According to Reddit, "There is a mindset that parents are untouchable or on a pedestal, exempt from consequences and NEVER to be criticized no matter how shitty their behavior." which I suppose could apply. The other answer I found was the hope for something different. Which seems to be what she's consistently describing.

She's said that thing's might be fine this time. Tame, at least. Only time will tell how it'll really go, but my gut feeling is definitely saying otherwise.

"You know, she can't actually enter the dorm building without someone letting her in. We could just hide in here until she leaves." I suggest, half joking. To be completely honest, I don't want to have to deal with or see her mother. I don't want to be here when whatever goes down, goes down. But I do want to be here for Kiara.

"That's like the third time you've said that." She looks up from her phone, over at me. "You... You don't actually need to be here. You know that, right? Even Deven isn't fully expecting to be entirely committed. I'm not gonna be mad if you leave."

"No. I want to be your emotional and moral support." I reassure her.

She's about to say something else, when her phone pings. She checks the message. "It's time..." She mutters, standing from the dining table—which we have added an additional two chairs to so everyone can fit.

She slips on her high-top Converse shoes, taking extra time to tie them. Stalling, it seems.

"Want me to go down with you?" I ask, putting the boxes of crackers away in their respective cabinet.

Kiara thinks for a moment. "Maybe..."

I nod, slipping on my pair of white Crocs. Then we head downstairs. We don't take the elevator. Kiara said she had a bad experience, which, ironically, involved her dad.

I can see her parents through the large glass pane on the door. I trail behind Kiara as she opens it for them.

It is very tense, I notice. Silence for a good three seconds. No literally breathtaking hugs or a bombardment of questions. Definitely a reality check for me.

"Uh, come in." Kiara steps out of the door way, and her parents enter. Her mother scans the foyer with her eyes, nodding slightly, then she looks at me.

She has straight black hair, like Kiara, though she's pale. She's wearing a black dress with a coat.

"Oh, this is my roommate, Lucille." Kiara introduces me.

"Right." Her mother says with no distinct emotion, "I'm assuming you two will force me to take the stairs?" She gestures to Kiara and her dad.

When neither of them answer, her mom sighs, approaching the staircase. We all go too. This is so awkward.

"We're on the third floor by the way." Kiara clarifies. Her mother sighs again, muttering something under her breath.

The bad vibes are very consistent.

Eventually, we make it upstairs to our dorm and things do not become less tense. I hate this more than I thought I would.

Her mother takes a seat at the dining table, while her dad remains standing. There's still four hours until dinner. This is going to suck.

"Uh, Konane." Her dad says suddenly, introducing himself, holding out his hand. I shake it with a forced smile. He clears his throat, and her mother—who'd been watching the exchange—seems to notice she hadn't yet introduced herself either.

She stands again. "Annabel." She smiles with just her lips, no sign of happiness in her eyes. Annabel eyes the cheese platter left on the counter.

Kiara bends down slightly to whisper in my ear, "My mother's being weird 'cause she's not allowed to be as bitchy since you're here." She acknowledges.

"I suppose that's lucky for the both of us then."

Kiara nods, standing upright again. She walks into the kitchen area, I sit down on my bed, not wanting to overstep too much.

"Uh, Dad, do you want a drink?" Kiara asks her dad, Konane. I'm going to do everything in my power not to address him by name. I didn't hear the pronunciation that well the first time and I do not want to butcher it.

"No, I'm alright." He gives her a warmer smile, but it still seems mostly disingenuous.

"Are you going to offer me anything?" Annabel accuses, not even giving Kiara the opening after her dad speaks for her to have had the opportunity to ask. Rude.

"I was about to—"

"Well you could've asked both of us at the same time." Her mother interrupts.

"Right. Sorry. What do you want..?" I don't like how Kiara apologizes here. She didn't really do anything. It's been 5 minutes and I already want to slap her mom.

"Do you have seltzer?"

Kiara nods quietly, turning to the fridge and then giving her mother a grapefruit-flavored sparkling water. I notice they don't seem to have been taught the magic words in their household. Not a single thank you.

I'll try to exchange some pleasantries and try to get on—at the very least—her mom's good side. Her dad seems less bitchy, so that'd likely be an easier task, but a less important one. Maybe being on Annabel's good side could benefit Kiara as well. At least for tonight.

♥♥♥

It's 5 PM now and dinner is just about ready. Kiara cooked with some assistance from her dad. I noticed how similar the two of them look. Kiara has her mom's hair and height, but she has her dad's face and complexion. They also have similar, hazel-colored eyes. Her dad is bigger though, rocking the typical dad-bod.

I've been chatting awkwardly with Annabel. Stuff like my major, classes, the basic small talk. She seems completely disinterested though. I don't mind. More time I spend having boring conversations with her, the more time Kiara doesn't have to deal with her. And I promised I would help out.

She also asked, again, if Kiara's been behaving, which is just such an uncomfortable question. Of course, I took Kiara's side and said she's been great.

Kiara doesn't seem to be doing great now though. She's uncomfortable every time her mother speaks to her and clearly does not want to be in this situation. It all makes sense why she's feeling this way, but I wish I could help more.

Her mother, thankfully, hasn't said anything too far out of line, and has been getting slightly better at pretending things are perfectly fine. I mean, maybe that's more of a negative thing, but at least there's been no drama. Yet.

"Dinner's ready." Kiara announces, unenthusiastic. Annabel and I get up from the dining table where we've been sitting and go to the kitchen area where Konane is already making himself a plate.

I'm not entirely sure what they made, but there's pasta involved so I'm sure I'll be content.

Annabel has taken my usual seat across from Kiara, but I don't mention it, sitting on Kiara's left and her mom's right. Her dad takes the seat across from me. It's quiet as we all begin to eat. I notice Kiara's clenched fists in her lap. I can't tell if her blood is absolutely boiling, or if she's just really, really uncomfortable.

"So," Annabel says, "How are your classes, Kiara?"

"Fine." She replies quietly.

"I found out Deven goes to school in Boston now. Have you been hanging out with hi—"

"No. We haven't talked." Kiara speaks over her mother.

"Good. I was never a fan of that one. Too... You know." She gestures with her hands

"No, I don't think I do. Too what?" Kiara places her fork down, staring directly at her mom. Konane sits wide eyed. This doesn't seem like a rare event.

"You know... He's very..." Her mother struggles to find the words. "Well, he's gay." She mutters the word itself. I hate this.

"That's probably because they " Kiara corrects, "are gay."

"Right, they." She rolls her eyes. Gross, gross, gross. "That's besides the point, I don't want you hanging around... Deven." She uses their name instead of bothering with pronouns. Embarrassing on her part.

"You don't have any rights over my friendships."

"We don't need to discuss this now, okay? Not in front of your roommate." Annabel says roommate in a voice.

"No!" Kiara stands, fuming. "No, let's do this now because when the hell else? You are always acting like you have never done anything wrong because you see yourself as the good guy, and then you hope I'll forget about it all too! But I don't fucking forget! So let's talk about this now, because after tonight I don't have plans to ever see your damn face again." She snaps.

Annabel stands too, anger in her own face. "Oh please. You might say that but we'll see how that changes when you get out of college, and you can't find a job, or a man who wants you or to provide for you—"

"For the last fucking time, I don't want a man or husband!"

"Right, right, because you're a lesbian. And this, hm?" She gestures to me. "This is your girlfriend, isn't it?" She forces out a mocking laugh. Oh. Ow.

"No, no she isn't. And if she was, why the hell would it be any of your business? Yeah, I'm a goddamn lesbian, and if you can't get the fuck over yourself, you can just go." Kiara gestures towards the door.

Konane doesn't intervene. Doesn't say a word. Coward.

"You make me laugh. You could've been good, you know that? You could've had your good grades, and you could've gotten a psych degree, and you could have had a life. But you are just wasting it all on some make believe idea—"

"I can still have all of that! Me liking girls won't suddenly make me an idiot." I never thought I'd see Kiara this angry. This is getting really real.

"Well clearly you're foolish enough to believe such a thing!" Annabel slams her hands down on the table.

"So what!?" Kiara yells, exasperated. I notice her eyes have become watery.

I don't even have the chance to blink before Annabel's hand reaches across the small table. I hear the sound of the slap, and then see the immediate redness that appears on Kiara's face. Jesus.

"You have not become the woman I thought you could have been." Her mother says, her voice cold.

Kiara turns her head, looking straight at her mother, "Well thank god for that."

"Don't be upset when you come crawling back and we don't let you in."

"Well then I'll cross that bridge if I ever get there." I notice a slight shakiness in Kiara's voice.

"Grow up."

"Get out." Kiara retorts finally.

Annabel hesitates for another moment, but then grabs her coat and storms out. Kiara looks at her father. He too lets his chair scrape against the floor as he stands. He gives her a look, maybe sympathy, and then walks out.

"I—" I cut myself off as I watch Kiara sink back into her chair, a tear rolling down her cheek, her teeth biting her lower lip. She hides her face in her hands, her elbows resting in her thighs. Still sitting, I scoot my chair a little closer, reaching my arm around her shoulders in a slight hug. I rub her back.

After a moment Kiara looks up at me, her eyes red and glossy, her face damp. Then she leans over and wraps her arms around me in a proper hug. It takes me by surprise, but then I hug her back.

A minute or two goes by and she still doesn't let go, her arms loose around me. It's quiet other than her occasional sniff.

There have been a lot of firsts today. First interaction with a friend's (?) abusive parent, first interaction with an abusive person in general, first time seeing Kiara so angry, first time seeing Kiara so sad.

I'm angry too. I would beat the shit out of her mother. I should've.

Finally, Kiara pulls back, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry."

I can't hold back my sympathetic smile, "You literally have nothing to be sorry about."

"I do! I let my mother come here which has now ruined both of our weekends—"

"My weekend isn't ruined! This is not about me. I'm doing okay. Maybe pretty angry, but I'm okay. You are what matters right now." I reach over, placing my hand on top of hers.

Kiara closes her eyes for a second, "Somehow you continue to make me like you even more..." She laughs at herself.

"What—"

She cuts me off, embracing me in another hug, which I gladly accept by hugging her back. But seriously—WHAT?

I mean, she totally could've meant that in a platonic way, but then why did she say it like that? Does this mean Dakota and Brie were right? Does she have a crush on me? Does she really like me? Well, of course she likes me, she just said so, but that's not the point!

Oh my god.

But what about me, though? Could I like her? Do I like her? How would we even work if we were in a relationship? I shouldn't get ahead of myself, but my question still stands.

I am freaking the fuck out, but I'm still not the priority right now.

I let out an internal sigh—as it would be rude to let out a real one—and just let this moment happen.