: Chapter 3
A Long Time Coming
I pace at the door of JPâs house, the morning dew freshly clinging to every blade of grass as the sun just starts to tilt into the sky, warming the temperature for the day.
I got about one hour of sleep last night. One if Iâm lucky.
Once I calmed Lia down and we finished our tacos, we played a few rounds of glass Yahtzee, but neither one of us was paying attention. I think both of our minds were somewhere else. We called it a night, and when I went to bed, she knocked on the wall, I knocked back . . . and then I didnât go to sleep.
My mind kept whirling over and over again.
Sheâs engaged . . . to Brian.
When she said she was going to have a relationship status change, I really thought she was going to break up with him. And fuck, I almost said THANK GOD! Could you imagine if Iâd let that fly? She cut me off right before I could. And sure, were they kissing in the hallway when I arrived? Yes, but body language is telling, and, at the moment, Brian was the one leaning into her while Lia had a slight lean away. That kiss was all him.
But lo and behold, itâs not a breakup in our future, itâs a wedding, and that makes me . . . well fuck, it makes me feel weird.
Because itâs Brian. The guy makes her happy, but he doesnât get her. He doesnât know Lia like I do. If he did, he wouldnât have gotten that engagement ring for her, one that Iâm pretty sure you can see from Mars because itâs so big. Either he would have asked me, the best friend, or he would have known. Never in a million years would I have picked that ring out for her or pressured her to get married in five weeks, only a year and a half after her parents passed away.
Yup, Brian met her a week after their funeral. Liaâs parents were both in a tragic helicopter accident late at night. Her mom was killed on impact. Her dad had a chance, but he coded and passed away during surgery. Two weeks later, Brian picked her up in a bar. She was raw, sad, and needed comfort, and she found it in Brian.
But she still has a hard time dealing with the loss of her parents, and I donât think heâs considered that. All he cares about is checking off the requirements his mother sets up for him.
Have a successful job.
Buy a nice house.
Get engaged to an acceptable woman.
Have a fancy wedding.
Deliver grandchildren.
Heâs on a trajectory, and Iâm not sure if Lia is on the same one.
But who am I to say something to her?
I pull on my hair just as the door opens. JP is in a pair of shorts and nothing else. His hair is a mess, and he looks ready to murder me.
I pick up the box of donuts that I set on the stoop and say, âI brought breakfast.â
âDude.â He rubs his eye. âJust because you canât go to work doesnât mean you need to bother me.â
âThis isnât about work. I need to talk to you.â
âIs it about the psycho who made you a pair of boxers from tweed fabric?â
âIt was burlap, and no. This is about Lia.â
âLia?â he asks, perking up now, a smile crossing over his face. He takes in my fidgety stance, the bags under my eyes, and then . . . âOh shit, you finally realized you love her.â
My face falls flat.
âIâm going to fucking kick you in the dick with that shit,â I say as I rear back my leg, and JP quickly jolts out of the way. âIt has nothing to do with my platonic feelings toward her. Got it?â
âSure.â He just smiles again and pushes the door open. âI hope thereâs a cronut in there. Iâve been craving one.â
âThere is,â I say. âBut youâre not going to get it if youâre a dick to me.â
âDude, youâre the one at my house. I can treat you however I fucking want.â
At the top of the stairs, Kelsey calls down while dressed in a robe, her hair rumpled as well. âWho is it?â
âBreaker,â JP says. âHe needs to talk about Lia.â
I glance up just in time to see a smile cross over Kelseyâs face. Before she can say anything, I cut her off. âNo, I donât have fucking feelings for her. This is different.â
Her smile falters. âOh, okay. Let me put my hair up, and Iâll be right down. Want me to call Lottie over so you have another girlâs opinion?â
Iâm about to say no when I give it a second thought. Having another girlâs opinion might not hurt, and since Lottie and Huxley live right across the street from JP and Kelsey, it works out.
âSure, tell her I brought donuts.â
âSheâll be over here in minutes, Iâm sure.â
Kelsey takes off toward the room while JP and I go to the kitchen, where JP starts making a pot of coffee.
âYou know, it doesnât shock me that you came to my house rather than Huxleyâs.â
âAfter walking in on Huxley and Lottie fucking against a wall, I learned my lesson. Canât get the vision of his clenched ass out of my head.â
âKelsey and I fuck against walls.â
âIâm well aware. The only difference is if I walk in on you and Kelsey, youâll just laugh about it. Huxley gives me the silent treatment for a week and then a lecture about privacy between a husband and wife.â
âHe still is rather uptight, isnât he?â JP asks. âYou would think after marrying Lottie, he might loosen up a touch, but he really canât seem to let the stick out.â
âAt this point, the stick is a permanent resident.â
JP chuckles while he turns on his coffee maker and starts making a large pot for everyone. He also sets out all the essentials of the espresso maker in case people decide on that as well.
âWant me to grab plates?â I ask.
âYeah, it would be nice if you made yourself useful.â
âJust a simple yes would suffice,â I reply just as Kelsey walks into the kitchen. Sheâs changed into a pair of shorts and one of JPâs shirts. Thereâs no doubt she probably wasnât wearing anything under that robe.
âLottie will be over in a second. I said donuts, and she ran. Not sure about Huxley, I heard him groan in displeasure when Lottie hopped out of bed.â Not surprising, Huxley is very possessive over Lottie. Then again, JP is also very possessive over Kelsey.
Me . . . well, I havenât had anyone I care enough about in my life to be possessive over. Watching my brothers find girls and marry them, you would think that it would make me jealous, make me want to go off and find someone for myself, but Iâm content. I donât want to press to find love just because everyone else is. The way I see it, when that one special person comes into my life, Iâll know it, and Iâll never want to let her go.
The front door flies open and through the large entryway, Lottieâs voice echoes, âDonuts, get in my mouth!â
I look over my shoulder just in time to see Lottie charge in wearing a tank top and bike shorts. Her hair is a mess as well. Trailing behind her is a not so happy looking Huxley.
âWhy the hell are we gathering so early this morning?â Huxley asks as he walks up to me and rests his hand on the island. âIs this about the job? Iâm not getting into it with you. You canât be around while the team conducts a thorough investigation.â
âItâs not about the job,â I say.
âItâs about Lia,â JP coos like a goddamn schoolgirl. I quickly direct a scowl in his direction, causing him to hold up his hands. âI didnât say anything about you liking her.â
âNo cooing either.â
âChrist, sensitive much?â
âWhatâs going on with Lia?â Lottie asks, her mouth full of a jelly donut.
âWell, since youâre all here, might as well tell you that Lia is engaged.â
âAw, really?â Kelsey asks, clapping.
âEngaged? Wow, thatâs great,â Lottie says.
âTo Brian?â JP asks.
âThe douche?â Huxley adds.
âWait, why is he a douche?â Kelsey asks. âDo we not like him?â
âThe boys donât like anyone,â Lottie says, taking another bite.
âNo, we donât like him,â JP says and then turns to me. âHow do you feel about it?â
âNot great,â I answer while taking a seat at the island and placing my head in my hands. JP sets a cup of coffee in front of me, but I donât even bother touching it. âHe doesnât deserve her. Heâs not good enough. And you should have seen the ring he got her. It doesnât have one ounce of Lia in it. Itâs as if he went to the most expensive and gaudy ring shop, said âgive me the most expensive ring you haveâ, and then bought it. And worst of all, The Beave wants the wedding in five weeks.â
âFive weeks?â JP asks. âJesus, thatâs quick, although our wedding was quick too.â He smirks at Kelsey. âBut that was to accommodate Kazooâs schedule.â
âYes, planning a wedding around a pigeon has always been a dream of mine.â
JP pulls Kelsey into his chest and kisses her neck. âYou loved everything about our wedding.â
âI did.â
Pulling the attention back to me, I say, âAnd last night, when she told me, she cried.â
âHappy tears?â Lottie asks.
I shake my head. âNo, sad tears, nervous tears, unhappy tears. There wasnât excitement in her voice, and she kept asking me if I was mad. Why the hell would I be mad?â
JP and Huxley exchange looks while the girls look away.
âWhat?â I ask, seeing that some sort of secret conversation is happening between all of them that I donât know about.
JP is the one to talk first. âDude, donât you think that a little part of Lia thinks maybe, just maybe, you would have made a move on her at one point?â
âWhat?â I shake my head. âNo. Weâve never thought of each other that way. This has nothing to do with our relationship.â
âDoes she know you donât like Brian?â Lottie asks.
âIâve never said I donât like him, but sheâs aware we donât get along.â
âMaybe thatâs why sheâs asking if youâre mad,â Kelsey says. âYou two are so close that maybe sheâs looking for your approval.â
âBut I donât approve of him. Thatâs the problem. Heâs not right for her, and I donât know what I should do about it.â
âNothing,â Huxley says, commanding the room with his deep voice. âAbsolutely nothing. If you get between her and Brian, youâre just going to ruin your relationship with her.â
âSo what, I just let her marry the douche?â
âYes,â Huxley says.
I blow out a heavy breath. âButââ
âThere is no but,â Huxley says. âShe has lost enough in her life. The last thing she needs is for you to make things complicated for her.â
âSo am I just supposed to act as her man of honor and smile and say yes to everything she picks?â
âWait.â Lottie slaps her hand on the table. âYouâre going to be her maid of honor? God, why do I find that the most precious thing ever?â
âThatâs really cute,â Kelsey adds. âAnd yes, you should. If you donât want to hurt her, only help, then you smile and be supportive. Also, quick question, who is The Beave?â
âBrianâs mom. Mrs. Beaver, we call her The Beaveânot to her face. Think of Emily Gilmore but snobbier.â
âOoo, brutal,â Lottie says.
âSheâs already been giving Lia a hard time. Thatâs why the wedding is in five weeks, because of The Beaveâs demands. Brianâs mom has been taking over everything, and last night when she was crying, I told her I would help her out, be there for her, but fuck, I didnât get one ounce of sleep last night.â
Lottie leans forward and whispers, âAre you sure you donât have feelings for her?â
âI donât!â I shout, only to garner a look of death from Huxley for yelling at his wife. Quieting my voice, I say, âI donât. I think Iâm worried about what will happen when she marries Brian. She wonât be my neighbor anymore, thatâs for sure, and I doubt sheâll be able to hang out with me as much, and if she does, it will involve Brian. I donât know. I feel like Iâm losing her, and Iâm going to lose her quickly.â
âWhat if you talk to Brian?â JP asks.
âThatâs a good idea,â Kelsey piggybacks. âIt seems as though the big problem is with him because letâs be honest, this isnât about picking out flowers that Lia likes. No matter what, youâre going to make sure you help her in any way possible. This seems like you need to fix things with Brian to feel comfortable with Lia moving forward. Because she loves him and said yes to the proposal, which means she wants to move forward. She might be struggling because her best friend and soon-to-be husband donât get along.â
âGreat point,â Lottie says as she picks up another donut. âFix things with Brian, and I bet it all works out.â
âBut I canât stand being in the same room as him,â I reply.
âLooks like youâre going to have to learn.â JP smiles.
I GLANCE down at my watch and then swirl my glass of water in my hand. Fucking ten minutes late, I already canât stand the guy, and now heâs going to pull this shit?
After I left Kelsey and JPâs house, I drove back to my place and went for a run. I wasnât ready to commit to their suggestion, but after the run, I realized they were probably right. If I want to put Lia at ease and make things less awkward for me, maybe I need to give Brian a chance. So I sent him a text, asking him what he was doing for lunch and if he wanted to meet.
He was eager with his text back and told me the time and place. Now that Iâm here, I feel like I was set up because the fucker hasnât even texted that he was going to be late.
I pull my phone out of my pocket and find a text from Lia.
I have to meet with The Beave at a church, the church she wants me and Brian to get married at. Please tell me you can go with me.Lia:
A church? Iâm not sure Lia has been to a church . . . ever.
Iâm there. Got your back.Breaker:
Thanks, Pickle.Lia:
Maybe I can be your Pickle of Honor.Breaker:
Donât even tease me. You know Iâll have a shirt made that says that.Lia:
I would wear it with pride.Breaker:
âHey, man,â I hear Brian say, his footsteps approaching. âSorry about the wait. I was closing in a conversation with a client who wants to invest in bitcoin.â He lends out his hand. âHow are you?â
I pocket my phone and give him a solid shake. âDoing good,â I say just before Brian takes a seat across from me at the booth I secured for us ten minutes ago.
âI heard about the lawsuit.â Great opener, way to bring up a sore subject. What a douche. And of course, heâs heard about the lawsuit. I wouldnât be surprised if he had something to do with it. Heâs always been jealous that Iâve been more successful than him. âHostile work environment?â Brian shakes his head. âI donât believe it one bit.â Well, at least he has the wherewithal to recognize right from wrong in this case, or at least pretend he does.
âYeah, canât really talk about it for legal reasons, but thanks for the support.â Wouldnât talk to him about it anyway. Not going to willingly hand him fodder to hurt me with somehow.
âAw, sure, yeah. I get it. Iâm sure your team is handling things.â
âLike they always do.â I smile just as the server comes up to our table. We put in a quick order of sodas as well as two steak salads, and then she takes off.
âSo,â Brian starts. âLia told me she told you about the big news.â Unfortunately.
âYeah, congrats, dude,â I say, feeling so fucking awkward that I actually despise myself at the moment. The fakeness is making me feel icky. âYou already know this, but youâre going to marry the best girl out there.â
âI do know it. Iâm really fucking lucky and so glad she said yes. When I proposed, there was a bit of a pause in her answer, and I thought she was going to say no. But I chalked it up to a hitch in her breath from excitement before she said yes.â
Huh, interesting.
Bet you there was a pause for a reason.
In my hopes of hopes, itâs because deep down she knows . . . the guy is not meant for her.
âThe ring is amazing, too,â I say, even though I donât mean it. The ring is an abomination.
âThanks. When I saw it, I immediately thought of Lia.â
Not sure how, but whatever.
âSo five weeks? Thatâs pretty quick,â I say.
âMy mom is pressing it to be five weeks. Thereâs a reason behind it. Lia must have told you she was apprehensive about the timeline.â
âYup,â I say, not wanting to speak for Lia but also wanting to stand up for her.
âYeah, itâs quick for me too, but the reason is all there. Iâm just glad youâll help her through it. Lia said now that you have time off with the investigation, you can go to the appointments with her. My mother can be strong-willed, so it will be good that youâre there to help Lia. Just wish I could, but Iâm totally slammed at work.â
âIâm sure.â I rub my hand over my jaw. Itâs time to be the bigger man. I mean, Iâm the better man of course. âSo since you guys are going to be married soon, I thought it would be good if we got together and, I donât know . . . just talked. Maybe get some grievances off our chest that we might have and start on a clean slate. I feel like thereâs been some tension between us. Or have I been reading the situation wrong?â
âNah, things have been weird,â he admits. âI think it was after that chatter about the stocks. Things went downhill from there.â
Well, hell, I didnât expect him to be so honest and upfront. Got to give the man credit for that.
âYeah.â I twist my glass on the table, the condensation collecting on the wood. âThat was when things got weird.â
He leans back against his booth seat and undoes the buttons of his jacket. âIâll be honest. I felt intimidated by your friendship with Lia and of course your success with your brothers, and I went about it in all the wrong ways. Iâm sorry about that.â
Huh . . .
This is, well, this is not what I anticipated. I expected him to maybe place blame on me, or say nothing was wrong, or even pick a fight, but this . . . yeah, I donât know how to handle such honesty.
I grip the back of my neck. âThank you for the apology. That, uh, that means a lot, man.â
âYeah, I should have done it a while ago, maybe things wouldnât have been so awkward between us and we could have hung out more, but pride is a funny thing.â
âI get that. I probably should have approached you earlier too.â
âWhy are you approaching me now? Besides the wedding coming in close.â
I shrug. âJust thought that maybe it would be best for everyone. I think Lia sensed the tension between us, and sheâs already stressed, so I didnât want to stress her out even more. I thought if I could remove a stressor for her, it might ease her mind.â I want to say ease her apprehension, but fuck would that open a door I donât want to walk through with Brian.
âThoughtful,â he says with an edge. Now that was the kind of tone I was expecting, not the happy-go-lucky guy I was just talking to. In seconds, I watch his posture stiffen, his expression grow hard, and the smooth edges of his jaw become jagged.
Sound the alarm . . . the man is on alert and ready to strike.
And here I thought he was going to be mature.
*Mentally rubs hands* This is what I was waiting for.
Keeping an easy-breezy tone, I say, âAnd with you guys getting married, I donât want to lose her. I know things will change because she will be your wife, and Iâm going to respect that. I wonât be able to drop in all the time as I do now, and I know our friend dates will be few and far between. I just donât want any awkwardness to get between us.â
Brian nods. âI can understand that.â
Itâs all he says.
He doesnât reassure me.
He doesnât offer up a plan that could solve my anxieties over losing Lia.
Just a simple understanding. My suspicions were correct. Once they get married, itâs going to be hell on earth to hang out with Lia. And letâs be honest. If I were in his shoes, I wouldnât want the best friend to crowd my marriage either. Especially if I was marrying Liaâwhich would be weirdâbut I wouldnât let him near her.
Our drinks and salads are delivered at the same time, and as we set our napkins on our laps and pose our forks, I canât help but wonder why heâs so defensive about my relationship with Lia. Weâve never, and I mean NEVER, given him a reason for concern. So why the fuck does he hate me so much?
âYou know, Iâve always admired your friendship with Lia.â He looks up at me. âThatâs all itâs ever been, right?â
Jesus . . .
Okay, so thatâs why he hates me.
âYes,â I say, looking him dead in the eyes. âSheâs my best friend, thatâs it, nothing more. You donât need to worry about anything other than us just being friends.â
He slowly nods. âWell, if thatâs the case, Iâm supposed to have Lia all to myself this weekend, but I would love to go out on a double date with you.â
âOh, that would be cool, but Iâm not seeing anyone at the moment, so your double date would sort of be a third wheel situation.â
âIâm aware of your dating status. Thatâs why I have the perfect person for you.â
Errrr . . . what?
âYou have someone for me to go out on a date with?â
Brian nods. âYeah. Her name is Birdy. She is my buddyâs sister, and sheâs been having a hard time finding a genuine guy. He was telling me about it last night, and I thought, you know, I might have the perfect person for her. And since, you know, you donât have any romantic feelings for anyone else, this might be the perfect chance to meet someone new.â
Any romantic feelings for anyone else? Thatâs a specific way to say that.
I feel like this is a test.
This isnât an act of goodwill or a way to get closer to me on a friend level. This is a test, and if I fail, he wonât believe me when I say nothing is going on between Lia and me. This is him trying to see if an ounce of romance exists between his fiancée and me.
âA double date.â I smile up at him. âSounds like fun.â
Can you hear the lies dropping off my tongue? No one, and I mean NO ONE, likes to be set up, let alone on a double date where you get to be stared at the entire time by an established couple.
If youâre looking to spend your evening in horror, thatâs the way to do it.
But I would do anything for Lia, so . . . it looks like Iâm a double dater now.
âGreat.â Brian beams, his rabid expression vanishing. âIâll set everything up and have Lia relay the info to you.â
âSounds great,â I say as I take a bite of my salad.
Go be friends with Brian.
Get to know him better.
Clear the air . . .
Yeah, Kelsey and Lottie can go to hell with their advice.
Uh, earth to Pickle, earth to Pickle, are you there?LIA:
I donât want to hear it.Breaker:
A DOUBLE DATE?? Who are you and what did you do with my best friend?Lia:
Maybe I left him back in New York.Breaker:
Do I need to borrow your private jet to fly myself back and see if I can find him?Lia:
Not sure the greatest SWAT team out there could find him at this point.Breaker:
I canât believe you said yes to a double date. Frankly, Iâm a little disappointed in you. You donât conform to social engagements.Lia:
But Brian asked, and I felt obligated to say yes. Who knows, maybe this girl will be the love of my life.Breaker:
Birdy and Breaker, it does have a nice ring to it.Lia:
We clearly would need to name all of our children with B names.Breaker:
Bertha, Bernard, and Barabbas . . . Auntie Lia is coming for those snuggles.Lia:
Watch out, Barabbas is still wetting his pants when you squeeze him too hard.Breaker:
I thought Birdy took him to the pediatrician to see what the squeeze pee was all about.Lia:
Weak urethra, just going to have to give him time. Squeeze gently.Breaker:
Barabbas is getting a head pat. Bertha and Bernard will be squeezed.Lia:
Donât you DARE treat Barabbas differently. Heâs human like the rest of us.Breaker:
Youâre right . . . youâre right, that was wrong of me. Iâll just squeeze gently and wear old shoes.Lia:
Now thereâs a good aunt.Breaker:
For the record, Birdy is a blonde, and blondes arenât your favorite. So curb your displeasure.Lia:
A blonde? Huh, maybe this one Iâll like.Breaker:
Only time will tell. Seriously, though, youâre good with this? I can cancel with Brian.Lia:
No, itâs good. Seriously. Might be nice. I havenât been out on a date in . . . well, a long time.Breaker:
Iâve never seen you out on a date. This is sort of exciting. I get to see how Breaker puts on the moves.Lia:
Please donât stare at me the entire time, watching my every move and smirking behind your napkin.Breaker:
The urge to do just that is sitting very heavily on my chest because the joy I would reap from that is so overwhelming that my cup would be full for weeks. But I understand such behavior will cause you to sweat, and no one likes a sweaty pickle.Lia:
Your concern for me feels so genuine. Thank you.Breaker:
Anytime. So do you know what youâre going to wear?Lia:
Can we not do this, please?Breaker:
Umm, great suggestion, but no. Brian setting you up with Birdy is probably one of the best things to ever happen to me.Lia:
More than your engagement?Breaker:
Donât tell Brian . . . but maybe.Lia:
I always knew you were a different breed, but this really proves it. Iâm going to bed.Breaker:
But Iâm not done teasing you and testing your patience.Lia:
At least youâre honest about it. Good night.Breaker:
I raise my hand to the wall and knock four times.
She knocks three, and for the second night in a row . . . I donât get much sleep at all.