Chapter 51

It didn't take long for me to start heading home, leaving him behind with mixed feelings inside my stomach. I was still a little troubled after rejecting him, not sure if that was okay for me to do or not. Shoeless and deep in thoughts I opened the door, sighing as I saw Alex's shoes at the entrance. I was hoping she'd be at a friends place or something, since I have to find a way to cover up that huge red spot on my neck.

I wasn't sure where she was, but I tried to dodge her, making my way to the bathroom upstairs and locking the door behind me. I've seen this in movies before, they always cover it up with concealer and I'm sure either my mom or Alex have something like that. Searching through their makeup articles, reading every etiquette until I finally found something that had concealer palette written on it. The whole thing contained multiple shades of beige, brown and even green and pink, which I didn't quite understand but oh well.

Opening the palette, I dipped my finger into the color that seemed closest to my skin tone, applying some of it on the red spot on my neck. Touching it kinda hurt, a tingling sensation running through the area around it. A good job he did there.

After a few layers of this sticky gel-like mass, I had successfully covered it up, although it was still a little visible, it was better than without. My eyes meet with my reflection, taking in my appearance displayed on the shiny surface. So much has changed in such a short term and I've never been too fond about changes. They can be so scary, but this one? I'm in a relationship! A fricking relationship! With a guy. I steady myself on the sink, leaning closer to my mirrored self.

I still don't understand this whole love thing, or a relationship thing. Why did Nathan choose me? Why me out of all the other people he could have started a relationship with? He's so much more than me, beautiful, smart, kind, trustworthy. Trust... I trust him so much just from being with him. It's been so long since I was really afraid of someone or something and I guess that kind of change is good. It's what I wished for.

I want to touch you...His words echoed through my mind, the guilt slowly creeping in again, maybe I shoudn't have chickened out, but on the other hand, we've only known each other for three weeks or something like that and now we're actually together. Things are moving way faster than they should. I remembered saying that he's different, guess that was true, he is more than different. Nathan is all I could have ever asked for, or even deserved.

Zoning out as I stared at the blue in my eyes, I didn't realize how long I've been just standing there. I quickly wash my hands, getting the concealer, or what ever it's called, off of them, before exiting the bathroom and quickly rushing over to my room. Although I haven't thought about it until then, the realization of what I did today struck me. I didn't stay at school, in other words I never actually attended any of the classes I had today.

My heart jumped for a second, the school must have called my mother then and if that's the case, I'm in some serious trouble right now. My mother would never let me skip classes, neither would my dad, since they're both pretty strict about the topic school in general. Pacing through my room, I didn't even notice my sister entering, waiting at the door for me to see her. And I sure did, with a heart attack and everything. "What's up?", I tried to be casual, crossing my arms in front of my chest as I looked at the brunette girl.

"I just wanted to warn youbefore mom and dad come home, they're going to have a talk with youabout what's going on with you the past few days. So you eitherthink of something good real quick or you'll come clean about thewhole Nathan-thing.", she smiled, a worried expression displayed onher face. Shit, they are? "Alex, please help me, I don't want totell them about us.", I pinched the bridge of my nose, rubbing overit afterward.

"Us? Does that mean you guys are officially a thing now?", her eyes started to shine and her body automatically jumped up and down in excitement. "Maybe we are, but that's not of importance right now! I need a good lie!", never would I have ever guessed to say that, considering they're my parents and all. "Why don't you just tell them, it's not like they are against homosexuality.", she calmed herself down again, her expression turning more serious.

"No, I don't want to, not yet at least. I will tell them when I think the time is right but right now, I have to sort things out with myself first.", my younger sister nodded in response, seeming deep in thoughts as she looked at something on my shirt, her gaze empty. I wonder if she's trying to get up with a plan of attack or if she's just zoning out like every other member of this family.

"I can't come up with anything, maybe we should ask Claire if she has an idea.", her gaze averted back to my face, noticing the trouble in it. "Did something happen between you guys?", the girl was a little shocked. I guess I can understand her, since Claire and I never fight with each other. "Well, kinda. I got carried away with Nathan and forgot about her multiple times, I can imagine how mad and hurt she must be.", I really am ashamed of what I did, or in this case, didn't do. I should have treasured our friendship and not throw it all away with my ignorance.

"This is perfect, don't get me wrong, but your conflict with her could save your secret. Just tell mom and dad that you are having trouble with her, which is the truth. They'll understand, after all, you guys are more like siblings than we are.", she was confident with her plan, not doubting anything of it, even after numerous attempts coming from me.

Since I couldn't come up with abetter idea and our parents had arrived, I decided to stick with hers, hoping it would work and not fail like everything seems to be these days. Alex didn't look at me for the rest of the evening, both of us waiting in anxious anticipation for the talk to come. I'm grateful that she had warned beforehand so I could get my mind wrapped around what I was supposed to say.

I was nervous and practically terrified through out the late day, waiting in my room after dinner for my parents to show up. Writing with Nathan was the only thing keeping me from jumping out of the window to escape the pressure.

What if they figure out that that's not the complete truth? Nathan, I'm so scared.

My fingers trembled as I tipped the message, closing my eyes after having send it. Anytime. They could barge in here anytime now, telling me that we need to have a serious talk. I wasn't wearing my watch, which resolved in one single vibrating device in case of a message. It didn't take him long to respond though, much to my sanity.

Stop stressing about it. If they have any doubts just tell them or call me over, I'll handle your parents. You said it yourself that they're not homophobic, so why are you so scared of telling them?

He made everything seem so plausible and simple, like, even climbing the Mount Everst would sound as easy as brushing your teeth coming from him. Not sure if that's a good trait to have or a bad one.

I know I know, jeez. Just in case they'll find out, could you come?

His response took only mere seconds this time.

I did say that. One word andI'll come running for your rescue.

I smiled slightly as I read his message, imagining his face while writing it. Why can't he be here right now, that would get so much pressure off of me. My phone vibrates displaying a message from my mother, telling me to come downstairs for a second. Of course, I knew that this was going to happen.

They called, wish me luck-heart emoji-

I didn't even have time to stress about the emoji I just send, instead, I gripped the black device tightly, before slowly heading downstairs. Every step seeming to drag me down a little deeper. As I reached the foot of the stairs my phone, still in a crushing gasp, vibrated.

You can do it, baby, I'll be there as soon as you need me.

He called me baby, for the firsttime and I didn't even have time to stress about that, because my parents were already sitting in the living room, turning off the TV as they saw me enter. That's probably one of the signs that you're in trouble. I sat down across of them, so a conversation would be easier for me.