27- Fix Me (Pt. 8)

" I love you too Jennie.. "

I caress this barbie-faced girl and slowly meet with her lips, her plump and soft lips are really intoxicating. Never in my life I ever imagined to fall in love with someone, I've touch many women before.. But no one can can match the burning feeling she lurks inside me.

I pull her closer as I trace my hands on her neck slowly snaking my hands around her head then intertwine my fingers while grabbing her hair to deepen the kiss. I lick her bottom lips to slide my tounge deeper in her mouth, she moans in pleasure as I slide my tounge and slowly playing with her inside. I have let many women taste my pleasuring touch, but no one can ever return the feeling but this girl.

"Uh..uh.. Jennie.. " her soft moan with my name in it has no match with any other music I ever hear. She tug my shirt hard as I trace my kiss to her neck, sucking while leaving mark all over it, .. "Ahhh, Oh My.. fuck .. J-Jennie.. " her voice intensely change into a higher pitch..found it.. I start to suck while gliding my tounge on her weak spot, her back is arched and her head is tilted granting me more space to intrude on this masterpiece owned by her body.

After minutes, satisfied with my work, I pull out slowly as I move my eyes too meet her and the moment I did.. I swear, her eyes could hitch your breath.. "Make me yours Jennie Kim.. " her husky voice filled with lust is the last thing I want to hear everyday. "I will.. "

I continue to kiss her on the lips but more intense and rough. We're so much burning that the only sound we can hear is the sound we made while making out, the slurpy and wet sound are like a soothing sound that made to take over my sanity as I start to pull off every pieces of Lisa's clothes. I start to move my kiss to her neck tracing them to her collar bone and move down to her cleavage I paused awhile and continue by slidling my tongue from her cleavage to her neck as I start to unclasp her bra.

"You're so breathtaking Lalisa.. " she pushes me a bit to take off my tank top. My chest brushes on her lips as she take off my cloth, she throw it off then peck on my left breast making my heart beats faster. No one could make me turn on like this barbie doll do.. She tug my body and make me sit on her laps, she start to flick my nipples with her tounge and only God know how much pleasure beaming in my soul as she did.

I start to play her nipple with my finger, I use my thumb to draw a circle on her left nipple while my other hand massaging her right breast slowly with a slight of pressure. Returning the pleasure, fighting for dominance, I pinch both of her nipples hard and that makes Lisa yelp in a very sensual sound, "aah....J-Jennie..." her mouth went apart and I quickly grab her chin with my thumb and index finger, tilting her face to meet mine, making her doe eyes stare into me.. "Not so fast baby, you're such a naughty girl.. " I push her making her lay down on the bed, I move down to her crotch, still fixing my lustful stare on her and start grinding on her slowly.

I haven't take off our underwear but I can feel our mixed liquid from a particular spot, I look down and damn.. She's damn wet.. "Take them off Jen..please.. " Lisa beg when I grind faster. "You really want to feel it? Hmm? You want me to spoil you that much baby? " she nods and grabs both of my breast, squeezing it "hmm.. Yes.. Lisa.. Play with my boobs baby.. " I grind faster as Lisa start to suck my nipples hard, "Ah.. Lisa..fuck.. You sexy barbie doll.. " the moan and the wet sound she make while sucking and nibbling my nipples making me hornier, the mixed scent of our wetness and the sweat on our body making me more riled up.

I can't hold myself anymore..

"Jennie.. " I feel a light shake on my shoulder. "Hmm.. Lisa.. "

"Jennie, wake up.. I made breakfast.. "

What? Breakfast? I open my eyes as a fierce light shoot into my retina, damn.. I have a wet dream.. "Good morning sleepy head.. " she greets me with a smile, my blurry vision got freshen instantly when she strokes my hair. "Come on.. Wake up.. " I blink a few times and look down on my clothes. Shit! I was really dreaming..

"Did you have a nightmare?" No.. Waking up from wet dream is my nightmare. She caress my cheek with a gentle touch and that made me rewind all the moments we had in my dream, I feel my body combusts instantly, my face heated with so much flame. "Are you okay Jennie? Your face is so red.. " her expression turned into a worried one. "I-Im fine.. I'll just go and take bath, prepare my clothes.. " I rushly say while standing up. "But...you don't have your clothes here.. " I know she was puzzled by my odd act. "Just, let me borrow your clothes, I'll buy you a new one.. " I'm so nervous that I randomly grabbed a towel in Lisa's room. "O-okay.. "

Damn.. That was close.. I turn on the shower and let myself dripped in the cold water. My hormones calm as every second passed with every drop of water on my skin, my nerves are more relax. I smile at the thought of making Lisa mine.. Physically, but I don't think it will work, to be frank.. Yes I want to, but I'm not going to have her body if I can't have her soul.

Talking about the dream, among all the part in it.. The most realistic one was the part where she said I love you too Jennie, I really thought I heard it right, like.. It's really Lisa.. It's really her voice from our real life.. But, that is absurd.. Lisa isn't like that, she's not subtle, she.. She will never reciprocate my feeling. I sigh, yes.. Indeed..

Then, why am I even here? Because I simply like the idea to be with Lisa.. No no no.. Let me correct that, it simply because I love her. It is indeed one sided, but I can't afford to lose her, to let her go. The thought about future.. A lump of worry start to lurks inside me, the fear.. I'm scared of the future.. I can't be with Lisa.. She won't be with me..

Then.. What now? Am I going to stay when she doesn't want to? Am I going to hold her if she will eventually let me go? Her career had proven that I don't have a chance to be with her, but still I.. Why am I being like this? Thinking that we will be together? thinking that she will fix me? Thinking that she's the only one who can make me feel alive, erasing all the fear, making me secure, fading my worsing remorse and nightmare..

I'm screwed..

I can't...

"Jennie? You've been there for 45 minutes.. Are you okay? The food might get cold.. " I was snapped right away when I hear her angelic voice. I close my eyes.. Stop Jennie.. Not now, not right here.

I'm scared..

Not right now Jennie! I clench my eyes tight..

She's gonna leave you..

I shut both of my ears with my hands.. No!

This is just a momentary for her..

I fall down with both of my knees on the floor.. Stop it.. Stopppp! I slap my head hard so the voice disappear but it looks like it won't go, it's still clinging, whispering words in my head.

Bang! Bang! Bang! I bang my head on the door to shut the voice off. Why now, why here!!

"Jennie!! Are you okay?! Open the door!" Lisa knock the door hard, but I just can't stand, my heart beats rapidly and my whole body is trembling, I was laid on the floor weak and incapable of moving. Devastated..

Brak!! Lisa opened the door with a hard kick, the lock was broken instantly. "J-J-Jennie.. " She quickly grab the towel and wrap my naked body with it. "Lisa.. Help.. "

LISA

"Lisa.. Help.. " a lump of worry start to choke my lungs as I see Jennie's condition. "Shh.. It's okay.. I'm here, I'm here with you.. Don't be afraid.. "

I hug her tight and hold her hand that is trembling so much. I pull out slightly from the hug minute after, to see her face, she's pale and her lips are parted, shivering as the cold water haven't been wiped off from her body.

I immediately lift her in bridal style and put her gently on the bed. I fix the towels on her body when realizing half of her body is exposed slightly. The mark that left on her body savouring my sight, oddly beautiful, my heart sink deeper when I contemplate every detail of the scars on her body, some were scars are merely visible, some are deep that it makes your heart scrunch in pain when you see it.

Letting aside the matter, I shift my attention to the puffy cheek girl. "Hey.. It's okay.. " I stroke her hair gently and put a strand of her hair that blocking her face behind her ear. She open her eyes slowly and immediately meet gaze, her eyes are filled with tears and that tears make my heart break apart. I caress her cheek with my thumb, her face and lips are pale.

"Let's put on your clothes first, you'll catch cold" I say in a gentle tone and that make her nods weakly. I help her to sit by pulling her body at the side of the bed. I was pulling off her towel when she stops me "I-its okay.. I can wear it on my own" she hang her head low, her cheeks turn red with shyness. I smile at her and nod. "Okay.. I'll be right here and face my back on you.. " I want to make sure that she's okay and want to be by her side, so I decided just to turn around while waiting her to put on the clothes.

I don't really mind looking at her body, well it's not because I have a weird thought about her because of her sexy alluring body, that make you salivate at her perfect curve coated by a milky white skin with a touch of silk..

Wait..

Forget that part, the thing is.. No, I don't have any fucking weird thought about her. "Lisa.. " I feel a light taps on my shoulder and I was dead snapped out that I immediately turn around to face her. "Y-ye... "

.. Damn.. We're so close.. Her face is merely an inch from me, I look down meeting her eyes. drowning deeper, the urge to hold the girl is flaming.. I mentally slap myself for wanting something absurd.

Our sudden proximity make her stepped back. "I-im.. Done.. " she look down on the floor, her pale skin painted with a pinkish stain. The more I grow closer to her, the more I know her.. She isn't actually a rude bold woman, she's just a shy and soft girl, shielded by her dark nature to prevent her sorrowful past from drowning her.

"You need to eat Jen.. Let's go? " I smile at her..

JENNIE

And fuck my heart!! If smile can kill someone, I'm probably dead by now, Lisa's smile have never fail to bleed my heart.

"Jen? "

"Y-yes.. Let's go.. "

We sit on the dining table, facing opposite to each other, the food have been slightly become cold, but Lisa's effort isn't worth to be wasted.

"It's still good? " Lisa break the silence which was occupied by my focus on her food. I nods while munching, her expression change into a wide smile, my heart flutter again.

We finished the food less than 15 minutes, amazingly.. I realized I'm addicted to everything that engaged to Lisa.. Including her cooking, her hobby, her interest.. Everything about her, makes my day on purpose.

"Jen.. Are you okay now? You still look pale.. " Lisa ask with a concern tone, we were seated on her couch after finishing our breakfast. To be honest, I'm still triggered by what happened to me before, I don't know since when I developed a delusional sound in my head. Am I crazy?

I shut my eyes tight, no this can't be.. "Jen? What's wrong? Is it about.. " I nods my head, still closing my eyes. "Hey.. Do you want to talk about it? " I feel a light touch on my hand, a soothing feeling start to calm my anxiety. I open my eyes slowly, Lisa's eyes meet with mine.. Her worried expression decorates her face, and oddly.. It sends me a strength.

"I'm hearing something in my head.. " I start to open my mouth and that makes her lean closer. "What did it said? " she asks in her counselor tone. Should I tell her that I'm afraid I will lose her? that it trigger my sanit? causing a weird voice whisper that I'm gonna be alone? No.. I don't want that, it's gonna complicates things. "That.. I'm alone... I'm useless.. " there, half truth and half lie. Her eyes immediately change soft, her eyelids drop, and she gives me a gentle smile.

"You aren't alone Jennie.. " I shake my head and drop my stares on the floor, because I was alone from the start, I am alone in this battle. "Jen.. Look at me? " Lisa demand and tilt my head to meet her doe eyes. "I'll help you.. You are not alone.. I'm here.. " she assure me with a smile, I stare back, finding the doubt in her eyes but all I found is.. A genuine stares. "Stop pushing people away Jen.. Give yourself a chance for a happiness, be brave, be yourself.. " her voice sounds like a soothing melody.

"We will check your mental health.. And assign you to a counselor.. " she give me hope, should I hold on it? or risk myself to break again? "Can't you just be my counselor?" I ask her in a small voice, I prefer Lisa to be my counselor rather than coping with another stranger, my wall will be automatically build up to be my shield and my bitch side always get the best of me.

She let out a chuckles and shake her head. No? ...

" No Jen.. I can't be your counselor anymore, our relationship have fall to another level.. It supposed to be a natural relation, and here we are.. Talking freely beyond our personal boundary.. The therapy won't be the same.. But don't worry, I'll help you to find the best counselor okay? "

I nod slightly, pursing my lips.. But still, I have something bothering in my mind. "Why? Is there any doubt? " Lisa is indeed an observant person, I nods slightly again. "How.. About.. your.. Supervisor? " her expression change and she let out a small sigh, and smile weakly. "Let's put them aside for now.. I won't say anything and I won't send you to the same counseling center. We'll go to another center.. Don't worry okay? "

She caress my backhand with her thumb. "The.. Ethic? " I remember reading about that when I do my research about Lisa's career. Her weak smile didn't leave her face, yet I know she's actually.. Feeling trapped between my issue and her issue. "It's okay if it's you.. "

It's okay if it's you.

Did I heard it right? I swear that five words send a fluttering feeling inside my heart, did I mistaken the meaning behind the words, it could be simply because of the friend thing between me and her, when I actually have another meaning about that.

Because if it's me.. She won't leave me..

I shrug the thought off, I don't want to ruin the moment. "Okay Lisa.. I will do it.."

For you.. If that can make you stay longer. As I believe, this bond will only last for awhile..

An: I'm sorry if I dissapointed you with a poor smut 😂. I'll do better, just stay with the plot line.

And.. Don't forget to stream LETS KILL THIS LOVE 😍 .