Chapter 29

"My name better be the only thing written in your diary today," Justin mumbled as he rolled over. He rubbed his eyes and nuzzled a little into his pillow before sliding over and snuggling in to my side.

I pressed my lips together in a smile, scrolling through my digital calendar to today's date before showing him the phone screen. "What else could I possibly be doing today?" I shook my head. He knew his name was the only thing written in my schedule.

Justin's warm hands found my waist. "I'm a who, not a what," he murmured against my ear after pulling me into his embrace. My giggles filled the room as we sank back into the sheets.

An hour later, we finally rolled out of bed. Our definitions of a lazy Saturday morning were still not on par, but the compromises over the last few weeks were slowly helping them come together. Half-past eight was a sleep-in for me but still an early wake-up call for Justin. So, while I got ready for the day, he trekked downstairs to make us coffee, mumbling dramatically about a double shot and that both mugs were for him.

I'd been staying at Justin's place more and more over the past few weeks. We'd only just decided that I should have a toothbrush here. While it felt a little strange, I liked the way it looked in the cup on the vanity, right next to his.

Keen to get the day started, I brushed my teeth and took a quick, steamy, shower.

When I emerged from the bathroom fully dressed and ready to fight for my morning coffee, it was to the sound of Justin yelling.

"Do not go in my room!"

"Why?" came a whine before the thumping of shoes on the stairs ceased.

I froze, staring widely at the bedroom door. It was slightly ajar, the voices in the foyer travelling easily through it.

"You said I could borrow your Lord of the Rings books," Claire continued, clearly annoyed.

"You can, just not right now." Justin's tone matched his sister's.

"What does it matter? You're not reading them right now are you?"

Justin continued, the strain clear in his voice. "That's not the point."

Another, deeper voice entered the conversation. "Claire, please don't argue. Go and wait in the kitchen."

There was a momentary pause before Claire finally gave in. "Fine," she moaned, obeying her father and slowly thumping back down the stairs.

I released a heavy breath, still staring at the door. Justin's father and sister were here. Did that mean Caroline was nearby as well?

"Dad, I'm sorry, I forgot about today," Justin apologised.

"Clearly. I'm sure you wouldn't be entertaining a... guest, if you'd remembered your thirteen year old sister was coming over." Michael Hart didn't sound pleased.

Unsure if I should be listening in, I sat down in Justin's computer chair, fumbling for a distraction. The easiest thing to do would be to close the door, but I couldn't. What if they noticed? Instead, I continued watching it, waiting for what came next.

"I still need you to take Claire to her ballet classes today. Carol's in Melbourne and I've got that meeting with the investors from New Zealand at ten."

"Yeah, I've got it, I'll take her," Justin agreed without hesitation.

"Thank you." There was a long pause before Mr Hart continued, the judgement clear. "I'll go and sit with your sister while you say goodbye to... your friend."

"It's not like that," Justin replied immediately, a harsh edge to his tone.

Disbelief, and perhaps a little caution, laced his father's next question. "What is it like then?"

My heartbeat quickened.

"She's not just a guest, or a friend." The way he spoke, with so much confidence and sincerity, even his father couldn't deny it. There was no repressing the smile that spread across my lips.

Mr Hart took his time before responding. "Okay. If you've got a girlfriend, you should bring her around for brunch."

"I'm not sure that's a good idea." The confidence disappeared.

"Why wouldn't it be?" Mr Hart questioned. "I think we should meet the person our son is dating."

"Maybe one day, but she's not ready. Not yet."

She's not ready.

"It's Elizabeth, isn't it?" It was a wonder it took so long for him to put it together. There was only one person in Justin's life who wouldn't be ready to meet his parents. "Have you even thought about Caroline? Considered her feelings?"

I had. In fact, I thought about it often.

She's not ready.

"It's got nothing to do with her."

"Of course it does."

"My relationship is my relationship," Justin insisted, the edge returning.

"You don't think this is a unique situation?" his father argued, matching his tone.

Justin didn't give in. "Yeah, I know it is, but it's still new. I don't want to mess things up by forcing past trauma to resurface before she's ready."

She's not ready. Was I that transparent?

"Have you met Richard?" Mr Hart asked after another tense pause.

Justin hesitated. "Yes." Dinner with dad was becoming a weekly event. Justin was always so willing and open to spending time with my father, whether it was at home or out at a restaurant. He never complained. In fact, he often seemed excited in the lead up. Knowing how much my dad meant to me, he made the effort.

I wasn't doing the same for him.

She's not ready.

Did that make me selfish?

"I see," Mr Hart continued. "So it is serious enough to meet the parents. Just not yours."

"Dad, stop!" Justin demanded. "If and when Ellie is ready, however long it takes, we'll come around for brunch. Until then, you'll just have to accept things as they are. Okay?"

"Fine. Okay," his father conceded. "Thank you for taking Claire today. I'll see you when you drop her home this evening. We'll talk more then."

"Sure. No problem."

The conversation ended there, the front door closing a little harder, and louder, than necessary.

It wasn't long before there were footsteps on the stairs again. When Justin pushed the door open with his elbow, I felt a sense of relief rush through me. He carefully monitored the rims of two coffee mugs as he carried them across the room, still shirtless and wearing nothing but boxers.

"Hey," he breathed, handing me one of the mugs.

"Hey."

"Are you folding my socks?" he questioned with a smirk and a raised brow.

Glancing down, I noticed the matching pair I'd just dropped into my lap. The basket of clean clothes beside me also held a few folded pairs. I hadn't realised what I was doing. "Yeah, I just... I don't know."

But Justin did. "You heard all that?"

I nodded, eyes focused on my mug.

"I'm sorry. My dad, he can be really..." Justin trailed. I wasn't sure what to make of Michael Hart. I suppose he had his reasons, and he seemed like a protective father and husband looking out for the ones he loved.

I shrugged. "It's okay."

"No, it's not." Justin reached for my coffee and placed both mugs on the desk behind me. Then he took hold of the computer chair and rolled me towards him. He sat on the edge of the bed, bringing my chair as close to him as possible before resting his elbows on his knees and taking my hands.

After a momentary pause, he shared his thoughts, the words coming out in a rush. "Listen. I know some things have been difficult for you, for both of us. It took us a while to get here, and I'm so happy." Justin paused again, gauging my reaction with concerned eyes. "The thing is, my family, well, they're my family. You and Caroline have a complicated history, and if we continue this, it will eventually mean meeting the family. Christmas. Easter. Other unavoidable events. I don't want to put you through more trauma. So, I understand if being with me isn't... I mean, if you don't want to—"

"Stop." He wasn't about to say I could leave if I wanted to. I wouldn't let him.

"Ellie—" he began, but I interrupted again.

"No. Listen." Unfolding my legs, I moved onto the edge of the bed with him, straddling his lap. I rested my arms against his bare shoulders to bring us closer. He needed to understand. "You have been the best thing to happen to me in a really long time. Yes, some things have been hard to deal with, but none of that was you. The truth is, I would have had to deal with my Caroline issues eventually."

He sighed, hands grasping my waist softly. "I know, but it's still not something I want to put you through."

"But it's something I need to go through. I know that. I accept it. Caroline is a very tender spot, and I'm constantly petrified I'm hurting my dad, but I can't hide from this anymore." Whether I'd met Justin that first night at Uni Bar, or I never ran into him at all, my feelings towards Caroline would have surfaced at some point. He may have been the reason I needed to face them sooner, but he wasn't the cause. "My first session with my psychologist is next week and I think she'd be proud of how far I've come without her," I added, hoping to lighten the mood.

Justin reached up to brush a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "I agree," he whispered.

"It's because of you, and the way you make me feel so safe and cared for." My heart fluttered. I couldn't suppress it, not any more. "It's because I..."

The words stuck in my throat.

Ever the empathetic, Justin gave me a way out. "It's okay, you don't have to say it. I know."

I also knew. "And that's exactly why I feel I can say it. You're in my heart, Justin, and you give me the courage to face the things I've avoided for years, the difficult and devastating things. I want this. I want you."

I was ready.

"I love you." I was confident he'd reciprocate, but my heart raced faster in anticipation than it ever had.

The corners of his lips turned up before they brushed mine and he whispered, "I love you, too."

I took a deep, relieving breath. The words solidified the feelings that swelled between us.

I kissed him back, softly at first, but then feverishly. Needing, and wanting, to be as close to him as I could be, I pushed him back against the mattress. Justin didn't protest. He knew exactly what I needed and gave it to me, as he always did, hands wandering hotly from my waist to my thighs.

We carried on like that for a while, my heart still pounding and showing no signs of slowing down. Well, until a loud banging on the door, followed by Claire yelling loud enough for the neighbours to hear, finally tore us apart.

"You both have twenty seconds to put your clothes on before I come in there. I'm going to be late, and Miss Violet does not tolerate tardiness."

I glanced down at Justin, who somehow managed to keep a straight face. Unaccustomed to the antics of little sisters, I stifled my giggles in his neck.

"What do you say we drop Claire at her dance class and then grab some brunch by the beach?" he asked softly before pressing a sweet kiss to the side of my head.

Pulling myself together, I reluctantly rolled off him, sat on the edge of the bed and took hold of his warm hand. "Sounds like a date."

A few months ago, the joy that swelled inside me seemed impossible. I knew not everything would be this easy and that there was still so much to work thorough—love didn't magically fix everything, after all—but I'd face those challenges over time.

I had a lot to look forward to—starting with brunch—and for the first time, I wasn't afraid of where my life was heading.