Chapter 5: Right Where You Left Me.

Kai

One Month Later

Eight years...

For eight years I have been in this relationship, I just know that I could only love Stan more than anyone else. It just pains me to even think about it and yet... here I was thinking about what has been done over and over again for the rest of my weeks. I never bothered to even change my relationship status or change the wallpaper of my phone that was a picture of me and him. While he... changed everything from his status... to the profile picture that he used... all the photos of us in social media - all the traces of us dissipated from being known anymore.

I have been acting like Armageddon, and it was interrupting the people at work, my work and my life as a whole. Dad has taken a decision to just put me into a month off from work, but I felt like I needed more. I still remember his words, they sounded so angry, yet he was being considerate of my feelings.

"Kai, I can't have you tearing around in the company like a widow in despair. You have to understand how you would act at work. Therefore, I'm giving you one month off, so you can think and take care of yourself... and please, Kai. Don't go too hard on yourself. Stan's gone, and you need to move forward,"

To say that I needed to move on was just so easy for someone who doesn't fit my shoe size. I can't blame dad though. He had been seeing me facing that same rough time back when I was seventeen but that wasn't even from a breakup. This time, it was real, and I even heard the words myself and how it was being repeated inside my head like a broken record player.

What even happened?

I sighed with my eyes close. My body lying blandly on the soft matters of our bed like I was a dead body floating on the wide sea, and it felt lonely in it. Even when it was a house given by him, I still felt guilty to even be here and live my life as he wants me too.

"Just... forget about me and move on,"

How can I even forget and move on when his shadow... his silhouette was lurking around the house and I still think that he's here. Why can't even move on and forget? There was an easy answer to that.

From when we were high school students to the years we were apart... to the amazing three years I had with him and to this one month. All those journeys that I wanted which then involves him was coming to an end of what seemed like the worst ending to a film ever.

It was so natural for us being together, and I even realize that since the first day we met. Like how easy it is for us to throw words to each other and never cared about being polite or be friends. We know so well that we would become a couple. A lover that started on smooth lanes then went onto bumpy roads that lead us to a path brighter for us to walk.

Which I don't understand.

I was only late for that one time date. How come it was all my fault? It made me have no sleep thinking about it. Was it that bad of a fault that it hurt him so badly? Can he not understand that I'm busy for my own sake? And there he just said those heartbreaking words that were just so easy for him to let out. It's like he had got sick of me... like I was a disease. Like I was useless to him anymore.

If you'd get tired of us like that...

Then why did we even thought of staying together?

I turn to my side to grab my phone, hoping to see if there would be any text coming from him. If he wanted to get back again. Yet, every time I do open my phone to see any messages... all I could ever see was my face staring at itself like I am the only person left to pour my feelings to.

"Nothing...," I lamented, putting the phone down and turning to the other of the bed. Why was it so easy for him?

Those eight years that we had been together... it wasn't just filled with good times. It wasn't just only colourful rainbows and blue skies like the imagery unrealistic relationship. Likewise, I expected it not to be because relationships do go towards the wrong direction sometimes, and I wanted that - because it felt natural that way. It felt as if I know that he would come and make it up for us. We fought, we quarrel, and we stay mad at each other for the longest it can be but...

Those words.

"Let's break up,"

He never even dared to even say those words when we do have our bad times no matter how angry, how furiously heated our argument was. There was just so much tension in those arguments compared to this one and this one was the one that he had to decide to be apart.

Now, who was the one being inconsiderate?

I close my eyes again, exhaling the longest breath I had to make me relax and get those thought out of my head. "Be strong, Kai... it's not like you haven't faced this before. Even if this time it was real... you can get out of this," I muttered, hugging myself to bring the heat to my cool body. I can do this... I can get out of this strangling woods of vines.

Suddenly, my phone rang out of nowhere. My eyes went wide open to the knowing sound of my ringtone music and I quickly turn around to grab my phone. My heart was beating a thousand in seconds - hoping that it was who I thought it would be but when I saw the name written on this phone screen, my heart sunk down again.

'Charlie'

"Ah... what the... What does he want?" I mumbled with my veins twitching.

Without having no time to get ready for the upcoming antics that Charlie had in mind, I answered his calls in hopes that it was nothing too serious. "Hey, Charlie... what's up?" I spoke, sitting up on the bed.

"Hey! It's so long since I hear your voice!" He responded.

I put a hand onto my forehead, massaging my temple to ease the dizziness after lying down for a long. "We met about two months ago...,"

"That's the problem! It's been so long since we've gone out together! How about we do something fun tonight? Going to the arcade... then eat some sushi...,"

"Why can't you go with Ryan?" I suggested. My energy doesn't really want to hang out right now. I heard him shuffling around at the other side of the phone - probably at his house since today was a Sunday. "I am... going with Ryan. But... you need to be there to help me on this date!" said the man eagerly that made me flinched from the word 'date'. "Liara's gonna be there too so no worrying about being the third wheeler,"

"But I have work tomorrow," I reasoned, biting my bottom lip and praying that this would make him understand that I don't want to go out.

The man scoffed, the loud sound coming from his lips roared into my right ear. "Bullshit, do you think you're the only one who's got work tomorrow? Dude, I work in the morning religiously. Come on, Kai... don't be such a skinflint,"

"Whatever... I'm gonna pass for now. I have some other things to do," I grumbled into the phone. It is with high hopes that that would make Charlie understand I really don't want to go out.

"Aw... why? Wait! Don't tell me. You got a date with Stan, don't you," His voice was teasing and again, the word 'date' made my heart winced in injury. It was already hurt but hearing these words just added salt to the would. No... I didn't mention my friends nor my colleagues that I broke up with Stan. I just told my parents about it. It was just that I don't really want to go through those comforting words that don't seem like helping at all. Not only that, but I just don't want to see their faces that added more insult.

It was enough for me to face it alone this time around.

Hearing his words of which I have a date with Stan had me fall down to the bed again - the thoughts of having one would be such a ghostly scene of which would never happen but would haunt me time and time again. So I took this as the perfect time to just tell him.

".... We broke up....," I spoke, breaking another wall of truth to my best friends who haven't realized that I was in anguish and in grief for a month. He gasped audibly through the phone, a wave of confusion came from his tone which I had come to have no feelings for.

"W-what?! Really?!" He asked in disbelief and I hummed in response. "Whoa... dude. Is this for real?! W-when? How?" He continued. His questions were coming in like paparazzi and I felt almost like a celebrity.

I blew airs of exhaustion, closing my eyes for these questions. "A month ago... and I don't know-how,"

"Are you kidding?! Seriously? Kai! Then... that... that's like more reason for you to get out and have fun! Dude, you can't just be lying in your bed all day... you shouldn't even be alone at times like this. Come on, it will be fun and I promise to not mention anything about Stan,"

The way he meant going out and have fun made me think that I should just forget about Stan and move on. Like there was no hope anymore for us to be together and Charlie never even said to try to get back with him so what's the point? In other words, Charlie was saying 'the damage has been done, and you can't fix it like you used to'

"Alright... fine... I'll go," I let out in the end, agreeing to get out of the house and 'have fun' as he said it to be.

"Great! I'll text you more about it and... uh... do you want me to tell Liara?" I never really considered telling anyone at all and telling him earlier was just so that he could get off my back but... yeah... you know how Charlie is.

"Don't... I'll tell her myself,"

"Alright! Gotta go! Bye!" He said, ending the call before I can even say 'bye' back.

"Bye...,"

I got off from the bed, wanting to get a quick shower before I even start doing anything else for today. My bones crack from being stiff, and it felt awfully good to crack the airs out of my tired state. Soon, I would be over this heartbreak state and maybe find another man to help me ease the pain. Maybe Hayes?

Shrugging, I figured that I would soon find him later. Maybe when I get out with Charlie. "What's the use of sulking at home alone anyway? Better get a move on and find another," My hand went through my hair, getting rid of the tangled knots of hair.

Then, for the second time, my phone rang again and I didn't bother looking at who it was and assuming that it was Charlie. Why was he being so annoying today? Couldn't he leave me alone? I need some time alone for god's sake.

"Charlie, I know. You're gonna text about tonight. I already said that I was going, stop calling me," I spoke quickly, pestered by the busyness of today's call which at first I wanted... but not from Charlie. But from Stan to which my eyes widen when I heard his voice, but sharply in sound.

"Kai?"

- - -

Oh! What is going on now?