accident nineteen: memories

Song for this chapter:

Life goes on by BTS

(Happy comeback!!)

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"Baby!"

Jimin turned around from his spot on the couch, locking his phone, and giving Jungkook his full attention. "Jungkookie! You're home."

The younger jumped on the couch, landing next to Jimin and wrapping his arms around him, letting out a sigh.

Jimin rubbed Jungkook's arm. "Is there something wrong, Kookie?" He asked, sensing that his boyfriend was tired.

"Nothing is wrong. Just missed you." Jungkook whispered, resting his head on Jimin's shoulder and closing his eyes to take some rest.

Jimin awwed, turning to hug Jungkook properly. "I missed you too, Hun." He said, ruffling Jungkook's hair. "But you should wash up and get some rest. Your body must be tired from working out." He continued.

Jungkook hummed, still with his eyes closed, snuggled up to Jimin.

"Jungkook."

"Okay. I'm up." He said, sitting up with a pout that didn't go unnoticed by Jimin.

Jimin sighed, getting up from the couch and pulling Jungkook with him. "Come on you baby." He laughed, dragging Jungkook to their room.

Jungkook just went to throw himself on the bed. "I'm too tired to do anything." He mumbled, getting comfortable in bed.

A light bulb went on in Jimin's head. "Oh? Okay. I guess I won't be joining you then." He nonchalantly replied.

Jungkook suddenly jumped from the bed, going to the wardrobe to take out some towels. "I was kidding hyung. I'm not tired at all!" He exclaimed, turning around with four towels in his arms. Two for each one of them.

Jimin had the urge to laugh, but he held it in, feeling like he was about to break the bunny's heart. "Aww, but I was kidding. Now go wash up!" He said, trying to avoid looking at Jungkook's face in order to not give in.

The younger pouted, feeling like his dreams shattered right in front of his eyes. "B- But baby! We can save water if we shower together!" He whined, trying to drag Jimin to the bathroom with him.

Jimin dodged him, turning around so he was the one pushing Jungkook in the direction of the bathroom. "Too bad I already took a shower this morning then!" He said, successfully pushing Jungkook into the bathroom, and closing the door.

"Jimin-ssi, you know I can simply open the door again, right?"

"So, I was thinking hyung," Jungkook started, coming out from the bathroom, and drying his hair with a towel.

When he reached the bed where Jimin was reading, the older put his book aside, and automatically took the towel from Jungkook, drying his hair for him. "Oh my god. In the shower?" Jimin sassed.

"No, Jimin-ssi. You're not allowed to be dirty minded, not after you rejected me." Jungkook stated, still with his head down for Jimin to dry his hair.

Jimin laughed. "Ohh. I'm scared." He mocked, widening his eyes, and pulling a funny face. "What if I am? What are you gonna do? Punish me?" Jimin continued making fun of him, forgetting about the fact that although Jungkook was younger, he was twice his size.

In one swift move, Jungkook pushed Jimin on the bed, locking his hands in place and caging him with his whole body, sending the towel flying and landing somewhere on the floor.

Jimin felt all the blood rush to his face.

Completely opposite to his intimidating demeanor, Jungkook whined childishly. "Baby, I'm serious I wanna talk to you about something." He said in a pout, still in the same position, unmoving.

Jimin cleared his throat. "Okay. Okay, Kookie. Let's talk." He said, a little flushed, and was then pulled up by Jungkook, who sat right in front of him, cross legged.

The younger hesitated, not sure how to start, or if he should even ask. "Hyung, a while ago you told me something.." he trailed off, still trying to find a way to ask him.

"Is this about my confession?" Jimin guessed, being spot on.

Jungkook coughed, a little surprised Jimin saw right through him.

"It is. What about it? Don't be nervous. You can ask me anything." He reached his hand to pat Jungkook's shoulder.

Jungkook pulled Jimin's hand away from his shoulder and kept it in his. "You said you've loved me for years." He stated, looking down and playing with Jimin's fingers.

Jimin smiled at his boyfriend's cuteness. "Yeah, I have." He whispered softly, squeezing Jungkook's hand.

The younger looked up. "Really?" He asked, his eyes widening a little, still not fully comprehending the fact that Jimin had loved him all those years and he didn't notice. "Since when exactly?" He said in a quiet voice, not wanting to hurt Jimin's feelings, or make him feel like he loved him less just because Jimin loved him first.

The older sighed. "I think it was around the second year of our debut." Jimin admitted. "But you were so shy before that; we barely spoke."

Flashback (7 years ago)

"Jungkook-ah!" Jimin called, running after the escaping maknae.

Jimin breathed heavily, still running after Jungkook even though the younger clearly didn't want company, but he knew that was only because Jungkook was shy and he had a hard time socialising. So, pushing himself to run faster, Jimin caught Jungkook in a headlock.

"Why are you running away from me, Jungkookie. You know I love you. Why are you doing this to me?" Jimin said in a girly voice, acting like a clingy girlfriend on purpose.

Jungkook tried and failed to push Jimin away, still not strong enough to. "Hyung!" He whined, trying to wiggle himself out of the older's grasp.

Jimin sighed, dropping his act. "Okay, I'm gonna let you go." He said, feeling rejected. So, he let Jungkook go and waited for him to run away.

But Jungkook didn't run.

They just stood there, Jimin looking at Jungkook confusedly, and Jungkook blinking up at Jimin.

Jimin's frown disappeared, and a smile broke out on his face instead.

"Want to hang out with me, Kookie?"

The boys' friendship progressed from then on, Jimin knowing how to make Jungkook come out of his shell, and Jungkook's admiration for his hyung growing.

End of flashback

"I wasn't that shy!" Jungkook protested, raising his head from Jimin's shoulder.

They were laying in bed; Jimin on his back with Jungkook cuddled up next to him. Jimin turned his head to Jungkook. "Oh yes, honey. You were." He simply stated, not accepting any objections from the younger.

Jungkook pouted. "But I still loved you hyung." He admitted quietly, resting his head again on Jimin's shoulder.

"Yeah, of course. I know." Jimin said, nodding in understanding.

"No hyung. Really loved you." Jungkook emphasised.

Flashback (five years ago)

"Jungkookie?" Jimin called softly, poking his head inside Jungkook's dark room to see if the boy was inside.

He was.

"Huh?" Jungkook turned to the source of the voice, sniffling and wiping his face quickly. "Hyung, please I just wanna be alone right now." Jungkook quietly said, trying not to make it obvious he was crying.

Jimin sighed, going inside the room and closing the door behind him. He moved to where Jungkook was sitting on the floor with his back to the bed, crouching down in front of him and putting his hand on Jungkook's knee. "Jungkookie. What's wrong? You can tell hyung." Jimin said softly, his heart breaking at Jungkook's state; wet eyelashes, red nose, and tear stained cheeks. He reached over to wipe a tear on Jungkook's cheek that the younger had missed, leaving his hand to rest on Jungkook's face.

"Nothing, hyung. You're just gonna think I'm weak or something." The younger said, looking away from Jimin when he felt another wave of tears coming.

Jimin was stubborn, so he pulled Jungkook's face back gently to make him look at him. "Now, why would I think that? No matter what you're feeling at the moment, I'm gonna be here for you. Just tell me what's wrong, and hyung is gonna fix it. Okay?" Jimin said firmly, looking at Jungkook in the eye.

Jungkook's eyes filled with tears again, his lips trembling. "Hyung." He sobbed.

Jimin gasped, and pulled Jungkook in a hug, resting the younger's head on his chest, and moving to kneel instead. "It's okay, baby. Everything's gonna be okay." Jimin reassured, stroking Jungkook's hair.

Jungkook tightened his arms around Jimin, crying even harder in his hyung's chest. "Y-You're g-g-going to kick me o-out of the band. R-Right?" The boy sobbed, closing his eyes, afraid of Jimin's answer.

"What?!" Jimin yelled. "Who told you that?! I'm gonna kill them!" He continued to yell, tightening his hold on Jungkook in return.

Jungkook let out a little laugh. "No one, h-hyung." He clarified, still refusing to open his eyes.

"Then where did you get that idea from?" Jimin asked, looking down at Jungkook, or his mop of hair to be precise.

"My p-performance was so b-bad, hyung. You're gonna k-kick me out and find someone b-better, right?" Jungkook finally said what was on his mind, making the older sigh out of relief.

Jimin pulled back from the hug, pushing Jungkook so he was looking at his face again. He wiped Jungkook's tears again, and calmly said "I don't know what you're talking about Jungkookie. You were amazing today."

Jungkook frowned. "No I wasn't, hyung."

"Jungkook." Jimin said in a warning voice.

Jungkook just looked at his hyung, not saying anything.

"Don't be too hard on yourself. Don't you care about what I think?" Jimin asked.

"Of course I care hyung!" Jungkook immediately replied. Jimin wasn't just Jungkook's band mate, he was someone he looked up to, someone he admired and wished he was as talented as he was.

Jimin smiled. "Well, I think that you were amazing today. Believe me when I tell you, you're really talented for just an eighteen year old." He said firmly, stressing every word to get his point across, holding Jungkook's face in his hands. "If you made a mistake today, I won't lie and say you didn't. So trust me when I say that your performance was just fine." He continued, noticing how Jungkook had calmed down and was just looking at him now, hanging onto his every word. "Don't do this to yourself Jungkookie. I don't like seeing you like this, it breaks my heart." He said, stroking Jungkook's hair, and reaching over to kiss his forehead.

Jungkook took a deep breath. "Okay, hyung." He sighed.

"Okay. Now go to sleep. We have an early day tomorrow." Jimin advised, standing up from his kneeling position and pulling Jungkook up with him, moving to the door after.

Jungkook slightly panicked. "Hyung!" He called.

Jimin turned around. "Yeah Kookie?"

"Can you stay with me tonight?" He said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

Jimin smiled. "Yeah, of course."

Jimin held Jungkook protectively all night, scared he might get a nightmare or something, but the younger was sleeping peacefully, holding him back, and snoring away, making Jimin chuckle.

Jungkook woke up in the middle of the night, and looked beside him at Jimin's sleeping form, noting how Jimin was still holding him tightly in his sleep. He smiled softly.

Jimin hyung is so pretty.

He watched Jimin for a few minutes until he slowly went back to sleep with the smile still on his face.

End of flashback.

"So that night.." Jimin trailed off.

"Yeah." Jungkook sighed.

Jimin's eyes widened. "I can't believe this." He said, getting up to sit in front of Jungkook.

The younger laughed. "I've always felt something for you, but I think I just passed it off as admiration or platonic love, and I was so young when I met all of you, so I depended on all of you a lot, so it was only natural to feel what I was feeling right?"

Jimin nodded, understanding where the maknae was coming from. "And you never questioned your feelings until the kiss. It makes sense now." Jimin concluded, staring into space.

Jungkook sat up. "You still haven't told me since when have you felt like that for me." He whined pulling on Jimin's sleeve, making him sway back and forth.

"Okay, Kookie. I'll tell you." He said, making Jungkook grin. "But tomorrow cause I'm really tired." Jungkook pouted.

"Not fair hyung!"

Jimin smiled cheekily, turning the lights off and laying down on the bed facing Jungkook. "Sorry." He said sheepishly.

"Okay. No cuddles for you then." Jungkook stated, crossing his arms and looking the other way.

"Okay I'll just go and cuddle with Tae then." Jimin said calmly, moving to remove the covers off of him and getting out of the bed.

Jungkook pulled Jimin back by his shirt, making him fall on the bed again. "Where do you think you're going." He growled out, not a hint of question in his voice. "Don't play this game with me, Jimin-ssi." He warned, pulling Jimin close and pulling the covers over him again.

"What game? I'm serious. If you don't want to cuddle me I can ask Tae. No big deal." Jimin said innocently, when what he was doing was anything but.

Jungkook told himself to calm down, and that Jimin was just trying to get a reaction out of him.

But it was working.

"And what am I then? A potato? I'm your boyfriend. You have to remember you actually have a boyfriend. You can't just go and cuddle with anyone now. You hear me? Just because I told Taehyung hyung to sleep beside you that day, doesn't mean it didn't kill me inside. That was a one time thing, and it's never happening again, Jimin-ssi." Jungkook rambled, his face getting red from how angry and frustrated he was. The thought of Jimin sleeping beside anyone but him riling him up even more.

Jimin was just watching Jungkook not saying anything, resting his head on his hand and smiling up at his boyfriend. He wasn't actually about to go cuddle with Taehyung, but he wanted to see how jealous Jungkook could get, and it turned out he could get really jealous.

"But he's just my friend, Jungkookie, you know that." He assured.

"I know he's your friend, but I'm your boyfriend. There's a difference here, and it has to emphasised." Jungkook said, and as much as he was angry, he was actually stating some valid points, Jimin was pretty impressed.

The older just couldn't help but press a little more. "So I can't kiss Tae's cheek now? I do that a lot. And I can't cuddle up with him when we watch movies? Or sit on his lap? Or hug him when he's sad? Or-"

"No!" Jungkook yelled, cutting Jimin off, and covering his ears just in case Jimin just kept listing off things he did with Taehyung. "You can't do all these things anymore, or else you, Jimin-ssi, will suffer the consequences." He warned, reaching for his light switch and turning it off too, getting under the covers beside Jimin. "It's your call." Jungkook shrugged a little, trying to act cool, subtly challenging Jimin.

"Ohhh. I'd like to see some consequences." Jimin teased, turning to Jungkook.

Jungkook turned to Jimin quickly. "I'm serious." He said, giving Jimin a look to tell him he wasn't joking around, and it was something serious to him.

Jimin sighed in defeat. "So I'm not getting any consequences tonight?"

Jungkook wanted to laugh. "Thought you said you were tired. Go to sleep, baby." He said, raising his eyebrows mockingly.

Jimin just pouted.

"What?"

Jimin just looked at Jungkook with the best puppy face he could muster up.

"Baby, come here." He opened his arms for Jimin to crawl into, just now taking notice of how far apart they were.

Jimin layed his head on his human pillow. "Nighty, Kookie." And he fell asleep just like that.

"Wow, he wasn't lying."

"Can you tell me now baby?"

They just woke up and were still brushing their teeth.

"Later."

They went to sit in the kitchen and wait for breakfast.

"Now hyung?"

"Later, Kookie."

After breakfast Jimin went to take a shower to start his day.

"Now, Jimin-ssi?"

"Ah! Jungkook! Get out!"

Jungkook laughed, deciding to make them warm drinks until Jimin got out of the shower.

When he was finished, he took their steaming mugs to the balcony, putting them on the table there and going to their room again.

Jimin was just finished with putting on his clothes, drying his hair with the towel.

"Jiminie, let's go." Jungkook called from their room doorway.

Jimin turned to Jungkook, and looked down at the sweatpants he just put on. "Do I need to change?"

"No. I meant the balcony." Jungkook waved off.

"Okay." Jimin shrugged, and kept the towel on his head to cover his wet hair. "Let's go."

When they walked into the balcony Jimin saw the two mugs.

"Awww. You made this?" He cooed, standing on his tippy toes to kiss Jungkook's cheek, who blushed and went to sit down.

"It's nothing hyung. You said you liked the tea I made, but you didn't even drink the half of it, so I thought I'd make you another one." Jungkook explained, slowly twirling his mug around nervously.

Jimin went to Jungkook's seat, leaning down to give him a kiss. "You're so thoughtful." He whispered before going to take a seat right beside his boyfriend.

"No I'm not. I'm just in love with you." Jungkook mumbled just loud enough for Jimin to hear.

The mochi smiled, a small blush covering his cheeks. "I love you too, Kookie." He sighed, leaning his head to rest on Jungkook's shoulder, and reaching to hold his hand.

Both boys enjoyed their tea for a while, just sitting in comfortable silence, holding hands, and admiring the view.

"Are you going to tell me now?" Jungkook whispered, not wanting to disturb the quiet atmosphere.

Jimin pursed his lips and fiddled with their hands in his lap, not saying anything.

"Is it that bad?" Jungkook questioned quietly, squeezing Jimin's hand.

"No. No, it's not. It's just," Jimin chuckled quietly. "It's embarrassing." He said, looking up at Jungkook.

The latter pouted. "Aww, baby. Don't be embarrassed. It's just me, okay?" He comforted, moving to hold Jimin's face with the hand that wasn't holding his.

Jimin nodded. "Okay."

Flashback (six years ago)

"Live happily together with me, Jungkookie!"

Jungkook pushed Jimin away, embarrassed of what his hyung was saying. "Hyung, stop."

They were all standing in front of the camera, having an interview when Jimin thought it was a good idea to joke around with Jungkook, only Jungkook wasn't having it. The boy was still shy around his hyungs, having just started warming up to them and being himself, but being in front of a camera was a whole different thing to him, and Jimin wasn't exactly helping at the moment, so after he pushed Jimin away, he went to stand on the other side, far away from Jimin.

But Jimin wasn't giving up. "Kookie! Come here." He went after Jungkook, so the boy went to run away from the other side, and they kept running around for the rest of the interview; Jimin trying to cling to Jungkook and failing.

After a while Jimin got tired, physically and emotionally. He couldn't help but feel rejected when Jungkook kept running away, not wanting Jimin to touch him or jokingly flirt with him.

He wasn't being serious about it anyway, is what he told himself, but what he heard and saw after, made him really question himself.

He had just come out of the bathroom, looking for the rest of the members to go on with their schedule, when he heard Jungkook's voice and someone else's, so he followed the sound until he could recognise Hoseok's voice too.

"Wah! Jungkook! You're good." Was heard from Hoseok.

"Of course I am!" He heard Jungkook boast jokingly and the sound of a quiet slap. If Jimin had to guess, he would say Hoseok slapped Jungkook on the back of his head.

Jimin moved so he could see them, but without them seeing him.

Hoseok and Jungkook were dancing and goofing around. It wasn't a weird thing for Jimin to see, but what was really weird for him to witness was how Jungkook looked at ease with Hoseok. He was initiating skinship easily, and he actually looked comfortable with him.

It hit him hard.

Jungkook wasn't like that with him.

Jimin thought about all the times he tried to get close to Jungkook, only for the boy to push him away or squirm in discomfort, and he definitely didn't initiate skinship.

Without realising, something formed in the pit of Jimin's stomach. It felt funny, like a stomach ache, and he felt hot, the kind of hotness that would start from within and spread all over his chest and neck all the way to his ears.

Jimin was angry.

He was... jealous.

End of flashback.

"So...yeah." Jimin sighed, looking down at their hands.

Jungkook was shocked. He couldn't say anything.

Jimin looked up when the boy didn't say anything. He looked at Jungkook who was staring at nothing in particular. "Told you it was embarrassing." He said quietly.

Jungkook cleared his throat. "No. It's not that." He said, smiling softly.

Jimin frowned. "What is it then?" He questioned, sitting straight and waiting for Jungkook to elaborate.

"Hyung, you didn't hear anything more? You just walked away after?" Jungkook asked, looking down at Jimin curiously, who nodded his head. "and you don't remember exactly when that happened. You just remember that it happened." He continued, and Jimin nodded again.

"Jungkookie, you're stressing me out. What did you say after I left?"

"Look, I don't remember when that happened too, but I definitely remember what I said to Hoseok hyung after."

Back to the flashback

Jimin walked away, having seen and heard enough. His new realisation clouding his mind.

Jungkook and Hoseok were still dancing and laughing. "Jungkook I thought you were shy. You're actually pretty cool." The older stated, putting Jungkook in a headlock and messing up his hair.

Jungkook in return lifted his leg to trip Hoseok over, making him fall to the ground and loosen his hold on him easily. "Who said I wasn't cool?" He said, standing up and combing through his hair to fix it.

"No one. It's just that you get shy a lot with Jimin. I thought you were like that in general." Hoseok said, standing up from the ground and dusting his clothes off, shrugging after.

"Well, Jimin hyung is different." Jungkook said, like he was stating the obvious.

"Different how?" Hoseok asked, frowning his eyebrows.

"I don't know. He just is, but not in a bad way. It's like I love him and admire him so much, that I'm intimidated by him." Jungkook said, trying to explain the way he felt about Jimin, still not fully aware of his feelings.

"You know Jimin loves you right? You shouldn't be intimidated by him." Hoseok adviced, not wanting Jungkook to feel intimidated by any member of the band.

"Yeah, of course I know that. Even the other day I wasn't feeling the best and Jimin hyung was there for me. He takes care of me." Jungkook explained.

"What happened the other day?" The older asked, concerned for their maknae.

"I- Uh- was crying in my room about my performance and he comforted me and told me how good I was and yeah, he was great." Jungkook said, smiling shyly.

Hoseok smiled too. "I'm glad then. Jimin is a really good friend."

End of flashback.

Jimin gasped, wide eyed, standing up from his chair so fast it fell over. "So that means- oh my god. My whole life is a lie!" He yelled, falling to his knees on the floor.

Jungkook sighed. "So dramatic."