Bonus Accident: Two pt.3

Songs for this chapter:

Vas by Jagger Finn

Space song by Beach House

Rises the moon by Liana Flores

Recently by Liana Flores

Bicycle by RM

House Of Cards by BTS

Let Me Know by BTS

Hold Me Tight by BTS

Fine line by Harry Styles

Jimin pushed the door open, hearing soft footsteps behind him, so he just shook his head with a soft laugh, and walked into the room, not closing the door all the way in on purpose.

"Jiminie, sit down." Namjoon said from his desk chair, pointing at his made bed, and scratching at his head after. "I wanted to apologize."

"There's no need, hyun-"

"No. There is." Namjoon stopped Jimin before he could brush his apology off. "What I said- what happened in the living room- that outburst, I wanna explain why it happened."

Jimin pursed his lips, putting his hands under his thighs, nodding for Namjoon to go on.

"See, what actually happened out of anger, was that I said all those hurtful things because I was hurt myself, because-" He took a deep breath. "Because I was hurt that you wouldn't come to me, to talk, to tell me you had all this baggage and that you were thinking of breaking up with Jungkook. I was hurt you didn't come to me for help, or for advice, and I was more hurt because just like you didn't come to me before you did it, you disappeared off the face of the earth after, you didn't reach out to any of us for support- which I now realise why you did it. Doesn't hurt any less though." Namjoon explained, looking at Jimin who was looking at the ground now, too scared to make eye contact and have a break down.

"I understand." Jimin nodded, trying keep his voice steady.

"No, Jimin. You don't." Namjoon said softly. "You don't understand how it feels like to have two of your younger brothers this hurt and you can't do anything about it, because they wouldn't let you, and they don't want you to help, they're self destructing, and you can only watch." He explained calmly. "You might understand what it feels like to have a broken heart, both because you got separated from the love of your life, and because you were the one to do it, but you'll never understand what it feels like to be helpless. What really hurt wasn't just seeing Jungkook go through what he had to go through, it was also the thought of you being all alone in your apartment, and god only knows what was happening to you. Because if Jungkook is suffering this much, how would Jimin look like?" Namjoon finished, still looking at Jimin who was looking down at his thighs, too still.

"I'm sorry, h-hyung." Jimin sniffed, clearing his throat after.

Namjoon frowned, not wanting Jimin to cry again because of him. "And what is it about you not eating?"

"I am-"

"No, you're not. Look at you. You're about to fall off." Namjoon scolded, looking at Jimin's more than usual thin shoulders.

"Sorry." Jimin muttered, still looking down. "I couldn't do it, hyung."

"Couldn't do what? Eat?"

"Function. Live with myself. Care for my own wellbeing. I didn't care, hyung, because the person who mattered the most to me and the person I kept holding on for, disappeared from my life, so what was the point?" Jimin corrected, digging his nails into his thighs. "And I know I'm the one who left him and I'm the one who made him disappear from my life, but- I don't know." He shrugged.

"Jiminie, I think that," Namjoon hesitated. "I think you need to love yourself more." He blurted out, too scared of hurting Jimin's feelings. "You don't love yourself enough to let Jungkook love you, you don't think you deserve his love or ours. That's not good, you need to love yourself enough to let people love you." He advised. "I think you need to look at the good things and the good deeds you have done in your life, and realise how you're a good human being, you're actually one of the best. I don't get how- Hey, hey, why are you crying?" Namjoon stood up from his chair, standing in front of Jimin who was covering his face with his hands, his shoulders shaking. "Hey, it's ok. It's gonna be okay now, no need to cry." He assured, leaning down to wrap his arms around Jimin, and rubbing his back, and his words only made Jimin cry harder.

"S-Sorry." Jimin whispered, wiping his face roughly.

"Why are you saying sorry? It's ok." Namjoon said, moving away and ruffling Jimin's hair.

"I think you're right, hyung." Jimin admitted. "I left Jungkook because I got to a point where him loving me, made me feel guilty, like I was manipulating him into loving me. His love for me made me confused, and it made me uncomfortable. I couldn't accept it, and I couldn't accept that he still loved me after all those years. It's almost f-four years now, hyung, and I still don't get how he's still in love with me." Jimin explained in one breath, looking up at Namjoon with a frown, almost angry.

"Aren't you?"

"Aren't I what?" Jimin echoed.

"You're still in love with him after four years. Hell, you're still in love with him after thirteen years, aren't you?" Namjoon pointed out, crossing his arms, still standing in front of Jimin.

"Yes, of course." Jimin answered. "My feelings are still the same."

"Then why wouldn't his be the same too?" He asked, tilting his head. "Jiminie, don't push love away, whether it's love from Jungkook or from yourself, okay?"

Jimin nodded. "I'll try, hyung." He said, smiling weakly.

"That's great, Jimin." Namjoon said with a smile, his dimples appearing on his cheeks. "Are you still upset with me?"

"I wasn't upset with you in the first place." Jimin shook his head with a laugh, standing up to hug him.

Namjoon hugged back, rubbing his back. "You're a good one, Jiminie."

Jimin bit his lip to stop himself from crying again, and he nodded. "Let's go watch the movie." He said after he pulled away from Namjoon.

"You go, I'll be right behind you."

Jimin nodded again, walking out of the room with a smile on his face, and he was pulled into a hug by none other than Jungkook, who was standing outside Namjoon's room all this time, listening to them talk, and his heart broke with Jimin's cries, and by what he said about feeling guilty. Jungkook cradled the back of Jimin's head, his other hand wrapped around Jimin's waist, and he buried his nose in Jimin's neck, trying to get Jimin as close as he could to him.

"Baby, I didn't know. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Jungkook whispered into Jimin's ear, kissing it after. "I'm sorry, darling."

Jimin laughed, trying to pull away to look at Jungkook's face. "Why does everyone keep apologising to me when it's all my fault?" He asked, pulling his face away to look at Jungkook's face. "Hey, did you cry? Why are your eyes red?" He frowned, looking at Jungkook who kept looking away, a little embarrassed, until he leaned down to rest his forehead on Jimin's shoulder, shaking his head. " Seriously, why are you crying? Do you want me to kiss you? Is that it? You know you could've just asked!" Jimin teased, shaking his shoulder slightly to annoy Jungkook.

"Hyung." Jungkook whined, still embarrassed.

"What? You want that kiss?"

"Hyung!" Jungkook raised his head, a smile threatening to break on his face.

"Let's go watch the movie." Jimin laughed, pulling Jungkook with him by the sweatshirt.

Jimin guided them to the couch, falling down on it beside Hoseok, pulling Jungkook down next to him.

"Hobi hyung." Jimin smiled, his face turned to Hoseok, waiting for him to lock his phone, and look at him.

Just as Jimin wanted, Hoseok locked his phone and turned to him, chewing on the popcorn he had on his lap. "Yes, Jiminie?"

"You're not mad at me, are you?"

"No, I'm not!" Hoseok defended, swallowing what he chewed. "Sad? Yes, maybe. Mad at you?! No, you're my baby." He said, putting the bowl of popcorn on Jungkook's lap instead and pulling Jimin's head down to his chest. "Just don't do it again, okay? We're here for you whether you like it or not, and we'll be here for you till the end of time, no matter what you do, even if you kill someone, we'll be here for you, if you just let us, and please, let us, okay?" He pinched Jimin's inner thigh, earning a squeal from him.

"Yes. Yes, I will, don't worry!" He laughed, hugging Hoseok back as much as he could in their position.

"Alright, now go cuddle your boyfriend 'cause he's giving me the stink eye, and I'm starting to get scared." He whispered, making Jimin laugh, and pull away from him.

"Sorry, hyung." Jimin laughed again, sitting up properly, his shoulder touching Jungkook's again.

"Yeah, just get him to look away from me." Hoseok continued to whisper, leaning over to take the bowl of popcorn again, and giving Jungkook a dirty look in return before he paid attention to Yoongi and Taehyung setting the movie up.

Jimin kept laughing, turning around to look at Jungkook who looked back at him with a frown, that only made him laugh harder. "Why are frowning like that? Gosh!" Jimin laughed, holding Jungkook's face and trying to get his eyebrows to stop scowling.

"I'm not!" Jungkook said defensively, frowning while he said it.

"You literally are!" Jimin protested, shifting on the couch until he was fully facing Jungkook, with one leg on Jungkook's lap.

"I'm not! See?" He smiled, almost painfully, his hand going to Jimin's waist. "I'm happy. See how happy I am?"

Jimin just laughed harder, until he heard Taehyung. "Alright, let's watch the movie!" So he pulled away from Jungkook, sitting down beside him again, leaning back on the couch so he could get comfortable.

Jungkook turned his head to Jimin in the darkness, looking at how focused he was on the movie and then he looked down at Jimin's right hand on his lap, so he carefully moved his hand until he could put it on Jimin's, holding his hand gently.

Jimin smiled softly, leaning his head on Jungkook's shoulder instead, and squeezing Jungkook's hand once, his eyes almost shutting down in relief.

Silently, both of them hoped it would be the end of their sad days and tears.

Silently, they both wished to stay as close as they were right now, sitting next to each other, holding hands with no worries on their minds, their hearts serene.

Maybe it wasn't a lot to ask, and maybe they could finally get it.

"Alright, love birds! Now to the fun part of the night!" Jin yelled, standing up from the couch, startling Jimin and Jungkook, and Yoongi and Taehyung, making Namjoon and Hoseok laugh.

"So eating and watching a movie wasn't fun for you, hyung?" Jimin asked sleepily.

"No, actually. I'm not that old yet, Jiminie!" He yelled jokingly. "So! Because no one cared enough to prepare a cake for me, I did it myself, and the cakes arrived just now, so let me go get them from the door." He announced, walking out to the dorm door, leaving everyone confused.

"Did he say cakes?" Yoongi asked no one in particular.

Taehyung, sat up from laying his head on Yoongi's lap. "He did." He nodded.

"What is that hyung planning?" Hoseok asked, standing up to go see what Jin was doing. "Oh!"

"Shh!"

"Alright, I'll go get plates and champagne."

Jin walked to the coffee table, putting two boxes of cake down, and waiting for Hoseok to get the rest before he could show them the cakes. "Hobi!"

"I'm here, I'm here." He breathed out, putting down the tray with the champagne and plates and forks beside the cake boxes, filling the flutes up, Taehyung getting up to help him pass the flutes around.

"So, because we're not only celebrating me going to the army, but we're also celebrating two very important people," Jin said, before he uncovered the boxes, and Jimin and Jungkook gasped as soon as they saw the two cakes.

One of them had a silly picture of Jin in weird sunglasses, and the other one had a picture of Jimin and Jungkook themselves, a picture they had taken two years ago that was too couply to share to the public.

Jimin covered his mouth in shock. "Hyung!" Jungkook gasped again, standing up to hug Jin, pulling Jimin out of the trance he was in.

"Jin hyung." Jimin whined, going to hug Jin too, even though Jungkook was still hugging him.

"Ugh, you're suffocating me, you brats!" Jin yelled, making them all laugh.

Jimin and Jungkook pulled away, going together to look at the cake again. "It's so pretty. How are we going to eat that?" Jimin said to himself, pulling some frosting with his finger from the side of the cake and tasting it, taking a flute of champagne for himself.

Jin cleared his throat, pulling Jimin and Jungkook's attention to him again. "I wanted to celebrate the both of you, because I know you two are really special, both to each other and individually. You two have a special relationship, whether you're together or broken up, your relationship will always stay special, because not only did we all see you be together and love each other, but we also saw you alone and broken up, and that only proved more how in love with each other you are. I believe in you guys, and I knew you were bound to get back together sooner or later, and that whatever that was happening was only temporary, and it was." Jin said, feeling like he was giving a speech at their wedding, but he had a feeling that he wouldn't be at their engagement dinner so he had to do it now. He took a flute of champagne for himself, before he raised it. "So, to me! Going to serve in the army! And to Jimin and Jungkook proving that love conquers all! To all of us!"

"To all of us!" They cheered, Jungkook pulling Jimin to him by the shoulders, before they all drank their champagne, and Yoongi got up to play music.

"Who should cut the cake?"

"Wait, I'll do it."

"Who wants to eat my eyes?"

"I'll take it!"

"Jungkook-ah, don't cut us separately! That's bad luck!"

"Wait, our cake is chocolate! Jin hyung's is vanilla!"

"I don't wanna eat our cake then."

"Hey, did you take pictures of the cakes, guys?"

"I did."

"Good job, bear."

Once they all had eaten cake, and drank to their hearts content, Jin had went to take a nap, joking about not cleaning up because they were celebrating him, before he went into his room.

Jimin then volunteered to clean up, and Jungkook had automatically stayed to clean up with him, everyone else going to their rooms.

Jungkook and Jimin started to clean up silently, both of them thinking about the long day they had, and about Jin's words. Were they as strong as Jin made them out to be? Then why would they break up in the first place? Jungkook thought if they really were meant to get back together and Jin was that sure of it, then what was the point of Jungkook holding back from Jimin, or him deciding that they shouldn't jump back into a relationship. Was he even right to get back together with Jimin this soon? Or tell Jimin that they might? Was Jimin expecting Jungkook to get back together with him now once he was 'ready' ? Was everyone expecting Jungkook now to get back together with Jimin? Was that what Jin was implying by getting them that cake? Did Jungkook give in too soon? Jungkook shook his head, leaning down to pick up a plastic wrapper from the ground.

Jimin washed the glasses, him too drowning in thoughts about that cake, and Jin's words. Why did everyone see and believe in their love for each other except for Jimin himself? Sure, Jimin knew he loved Jungkook and that Jungkook loved him back, but to really believe in this love? How could Jin believe in it that much and Jimin not? How could he have done what he had done, based on him not thinking they're strong enough to handle all the obstacles and hurdles life threw at them? Why was he the only one who couldn't wrap his head around it? And it wasn't like him breaking up with Jungkook had helped either. It had made things so much worse, because after he had done it, it didn't bring him the satisfaction or the relief or the freedom he thought he would feel, instead it had brought him a feeling of dread that would wash over him every time he closed his eyes to go to sleep, knowing he would wake up and it would be another day without Jungkook. Jimin suffered without Jungkook and he now knew that he couldn't live without him, but still he couldn't blindly trust that they would get old and grey together, just like how Jin believed it. Of course he had hopes of them doing so, and he knew that was the future he was working towards, but that didn't mean that he saw it happening one hundred percent, and it made him feel all the more guilty.

Jungkook walked with the plates and trash to the kitchen, throwing the trash, and then walking to stand beside Jimin in front of the sink, putting the plates down beside them, suddenly feeling awkward around Jimin.

Jimin nodded, silently pulling the plates to sink in the water, and washing each one slowly, Jungkook still standing beside him, too deep in thought to move, and with nothing left to clean up.

Clearing his throat, Jimin rinsed off the plate. "You okay?" He asked quietly, his thoughts leaving his mind a mess that he didn't know how to act around Jungkook now.

Jungkook snapped out of it, his head turning to Jimin quickly. "Me? Yeah, I'm okay, of course."

Jimin nodded again, not knowing what to say, slowly washing the next plate, trying not to drop it. "You can head to our room first. I won't be long." He finally said, getting slightly nervous with Jungkook watching over his shoulder.

"No, it's okay. I can wait, you know? I'm a very patient person." Jungkook nodded to himself, his mind somewhere else entirely, quite set on Jimin not waiting for him to be ready, or Jimin getting tired of waiting for him.

"I know you are, baby, but you don't have to wait, you're not obligated to. You can go rest, and I'll be right behind you."

"I am, though! If you mean a lot to me, then I'll wait for you, of course!" Jungkook blurted out, mentally slapping his forehead.

Slowly, Jimin set the last plate aside, and turned to Jungkook. "You sure you're alright?" He asked, studying Jungkook's face.

Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, I a- No I'm not." He finally said, deciding not to avoid confrontation, and come clean instead of hiding his feelings and vulnerabilities, it wasn't a good way to restart their relationship.

Jimin shook his hands from the water, taking the small towel to dry his hands after, turning to face Jungkook fully. "Neither am I." He admitted hesitantly. "I think we need to have a talk."

"Yeah, we do." Jungkook said, tapping his foot repeatedly on the ground.

Jimin halted, becoming a little wary. "Is it bad?" He backtracked, scared Jungkook might tell him he's changed his mind about working it out.

Jungkook frowned. "I'm not sure."

"Oh." Jimin let out, looking down, trying not to think negatively. "Let's go to our room then." He said, walking in front of Jungkook out of the kitchen, preparing himself for the worst.

Jungkook walked after Jimin into their room, closing their door shut. "Jimin-ah." He sighed.

Turning around, Jimin raised his hand up. "I know. I know what you're gonna say."

Frowning, Jungkook crossed his arms. "Really?"

"Yeah, I keep thinking about it too. I can't wrap my head around how I left you, or why I didn't believe in us as much as Ji-"

"Wait, wait, wait." Jungkook held his hand up for Jimin to stop talking, and he did. "That wasn't what I was gonna say, but it's still related." He shrugged.

Jimin walked back a few steps until he was able to sit on the bed. "What is it then?" He asked, getting more worried, because if Jungkook didn't want to talk about how Jimin gave up on them, then what did he want to talk about? Did he really change his mind about working it out? Did-

"Can you stop overthinking and hear me out?" Jungkook laughed, still standing with his arms crossed.

Jimin's eyes widened, not realising how he must have looked like, deep in thought. "Sorry." He uttered, sheepishly.

"It's okay. I just- I don't know how to say this. Uh!" Jungkook rubbed his face, getting frustrated.

"Do you not want to work on this anymore? Is that it?" Jimin whispered, looking up at Jungkook, holding his breath.

"No! Kind of? No, I don't know." Jungkook said loudly, waiving his hands around, and looking around the room, not taking notice of the broken look on Jimin's face.

"Oh." Jimin looked down, playing with his fingers as a distraction. "It's okay." He whispered, not sure if it was directed to Jungkook, or to himself.

Jungkook sighed, his hands going to his waist, and then he glanced at Jimin. "Shit!" He quickly moved to crouch in front of Jimin. "It's not like that. I don't don't want to work on this! I do!" He moved his head to look at Jimin's face, whose attention was still on his fingers. "Darling, look at me."

Swallowing down his emotions, Jimin looked at Jungkook properly. "I'm okay." He nodded, even if his eyes were shining.

"Look, I just keep thinking, and this is something I should probably vent to someone else about, but we don't do that do we? It's just that I feel like I gave in to you too fast." Jungkook said, all in one go before he could hold it back. "That's it. So, maybe I should have given myself time to think about us before I gave in, but wouldn't I still choose to work on this? Choose you? So why shouldn't I have given in as fast as I did? Is that right? Or maybe I really should have thought about this more, I really don't know. Would it have made any difference?" He rambled, saying whatever his brain gave to his mouth, rubbing Jimin's thighs absentmindedly.

Letting out a big sigh of relief, Jimin put his hands on Jungkook's, making him turn his head to look at him, after he was looking around the room when he was talking. "I understand." He nodded.

"You do?"

Jimin cleared his throat. "Yeah, of course." He nodded. "But I don't know what you should have done, 'cause from my point of view, which is selfish by the way, is that yes, it's okay that you've given in too fast, but from another point of view, pride maybe? Then no, you shouldn't have. You should have thought of yourself more, you should have thought if giving in to me after I left you was right for you or not, because you might feel love for me, but still hold a grudge or- or I don't know." He shrugged, his fingers intertwining with Jungkook's. "Maybe that's something our counselor will answer for us?"

"Yeah, maybe." Jungkook smiled, resting his head on Jimin's lap. "But it was what I wanted. Still is."

"You got me worried. I thought you were breaking up with me- well, I know we're not together, but-"

"Yeah. Sorry." Jungkook laughed softly, looking up at Jimin, who started to play with his hair, making him close his eyes. "What did you want to talk about?"

"It's stupid. I should probably talk about it to my therapist instead." Jimin said, rubbing his eye.

"Hey! I vented to you here! Then you should too, even if I don't have an answer for you. I want to know." Jungkook whined, raising his head up. "Hey, scoot over. My knees hurt."

Moving to the middle of the bed, Jimin rested his head on the headboard, and Jungkook went back to laying his head on Jimin's lap, so Jimin naturally put his hand in his hair. "Okay, but if you don't like what I'm gonna say, just pretend you never heard it, and I'll sort it out with my therapist later anyway."

Jungkook nodded silently, scratching his forehead, waiting for Jimin to start talking.

"You heard my talk with Namjoon hyung, didn't you? I guess by now you have an idea of what's happening in my head or whatever." He started, throwing his head back to stare at the ceiling, feeling Jungkook nod again. "I don't understand why I gave up on you yet, and I don't know why I can't believe you love me, or that one day we'll grow old together. I can't believe any of it, and it was part of the reason why I broke us up. I don't- Ugh." Jimin groaned, brushing his hair back in frustration. "I didn't want to break up with you. I still don't want to be apart from you, but I still can't believe in us as much as I should." He finally said, preparing himself for the worst from Jungkook. "I know how bad that is, but I think part of the reason why I don't, is that I believe that you're gonna get tired of me someday, the other reason being that you really might do it when you realise how you deserve so much better-"

"Hyung!" Jungkook got up, feeling like he was about to fight someone, or something. "If I hear that another fucking time, I swear!" He yelled.

"No! Let me finish! You don't understand! You're amazing. You're literally everything. You don't even know what you are, or how you shine, or how much I look at you sometimes and I can't wrap my head around how lucky I am that you would even look at me!" Jimin yelled back, moving to kneel on the bed.

"Why do you have the worst image of yourself in your head?! I really don't get it! Why do you degrade yourself so much, honestly?! Do you actually hate yourself that much?!"

"I might!"

Jungkook's eyes widened, getting a little red. "Why?" He croaked out. "Baby, why do you hate yourself?"

"Jungkookie, n-no good person would leave y-you, believe me." Jimin said, hugging himself, suddenly feeling exposed, like someone had suddenly taken his only shield from the cold. It probably had to do with him finally getting vulnerable with Jungkook, and facing himself with the truth, before he even did that with Jungkook.

"A bad person wouldn't break up with me because they think that they don't deserve me. A bad person will continue to stay in a relationship they're benefiting from. A bad fucking person will be selfish! Something you keep calling yourself lately, but I don't see any selfishness!" Jungkook bursted out, slamming his hand down on the bed. "I know my words make absolutely no difference to you, but please, discuss it with your therapist, and please for the love of god, don't let it affect our relationship that we're still working on."

Falling back again to sit down, Jimin covered his face with his hands, his knees up to his chest, breathing heavily.

"Come on, Jimin-ah." Jungkook called gently, nudging Jimin's foot, before he saw Jimin's shoulders shake. "Hey, hey. No, why are you crying?" He whined, moving closer to Jimin, and holding the back of his head. "Lay back for me, darling." He pushed Jimin gently, laying him on his back fully, removing his hands from his face. "You've cried a lot today. I'm sorry." He whispered, laying down on top of Jimin, with one of his legs between Jimin's. "You feeling okay?" He asked, still cradling the back of Jimin's neck, pulling his head closer to rest on his shoulder, hearing Jimin's soft sobs.

"Y-Yeah. It's j-just I haven't f-fully realised I did all of this to myself and to you b-because I really dislike the person that I am, until you and J-Joon hyung pointed it o-out." Jimin said into Jungkook's shoulder, taking in his warmth and smell, and it was enough to bring him comfort.

"Hey, I love you." Jungkook said, stressing every word. "I love you enough for both of us, until you're able to love yourself again." He promised, kissing the little skin that was showing of Jimin's shoulder.

"A-Again? Did I even love myself before?"

"Well, it wasn't always this bad." Jungkook pointed out. "Was it?" He asked just to make sure, not sure if Jimin was feeling like this throughout all of their relationship and was hiding it from him.

"Yeah, it wasn't." Jimin assured, sniffing and wiping his eyes with his sleeve after.

"Then what made it this bad?"

"When I left you. I hated myself more. I couldn't even live with myself." Jimin explained, remembering the thirty days he spent apart from Jungkook, twenty three of them was spent completely alone, with only his own thoughts to hear, and it didn't help when these thoughts weren't exactly the good kind. He woke up everyday with these kind of thoughts and he fell asleep to them, until he got to this point, where Jungkook was willingly giving him a second chance and Jimin was refusing to accept it in his heart from how much his brain had convinced him he didn't deserve it.

"So it wasn't bad until you left me, then what made you break up with me in the first place? And I'm not asking this in an emotional way, I'm just trying to figure it out with you." Jungkook frowned, feeling lost.

"I- You- I can't say it. It's gonna break your heart."

"It's okay. Well- As long as you don't leave me again." Jungkook joked, even with his heart beating faster than normal, not ready for what Jimin was about to say.

"I don't know how to say it, but look- maybe back then I believed that I deserved to be your boyfriend, and nothing more than that?" Jimin tried, not sure if Jungkook was going to catch on or not, but he hoped he would, because he didn't want to flat out admit that he ran away from getting engaged to Jungkook.

"Wait, so you left me because you thought being boyfriends was all you deserved? I don't understand." Jungkook raised his head to look at Jimin, not getting it.

"Jungkook-ah, I had to leave you before you-" Jimin took a deep breath. "I know what you were planning for us in this year break, once Jin left? We already talked about it plenty of times, we said it was the only convenient time for us to get-"

"Engaged." Jungkook finished, the pieces clicking into place, so he got up from on top of Jimin, laying down next to him instead. "You broke up with me instead of saying no to my proposal. I don't know if that's better or worst." He breathed out.

"It's bad. I know."

"Yeah."

"Say something."

"I don't know how to feel."

"I'm sorry."

Jungkook huffed, turning on his back, and looking up at the ceiling, giving himself the space to think about what this meant for him, what it meant now. "Do you still feel that way? Wait you do- I'm so stupid, asking if you still feel like you don't deserve to get engaged to me when you can't even handle me giving you a second chance at dating. Ugh!"

"Can you ask me if I want to?" Jimin asked, looking beside him at Jungkook, acting like what Jungkook just said didn't break his heart a little.

Jungkook turned his head to Jimin. "Do you want to?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Yes." Jimin said, a smile on his face. "Do you?"

Frowning, Jungkook looked away. "I-I'm not sure."

"You don't want to marry me?" Jimin asked, feeling like a knife was stabbed into his heart.

"It's not that I don't want to. It's that I'm not sure if it's the right thing to think about now." Jungkook explained. "We're still working on a relationship we're definitely not ready for marriage. We have to build a new foundation first, we can't jump into a marriage."

"Jungkook, I just asked you if you want to marry me or not, it's that simple. It doesn't have to involve whether it's the right thing to do now or not, because quite frankly the right thing to do maybe would be for you to reject me here and now." Jimin snapped out, his tone clipped, and he started to get out of bed, feeling like this conversation wasn't doing them any good but was destructing them even more.

"Hold on. Where are you going?" Jungkook sat up, trying to reach for Jimin and pull him back.

"I think you need some space. Think of it as me giving you space like you didn't actually immediately agree with giving this another chance. I think you need to be with yourself for a while." Jimin said, getting his phone from the bedside table, and shoving his feet into his slippers.

"Are you sure you're not running away?"

Jimin snapped his head. "Jungkook. Running away again, is the last goddamn thing I'm gonna do, okay? I've already told you, I'm done running away. I'm just giving you space because one, you're not sure if agreeing this quickly was the right thing to do or not, and two, you can't even see a future for us."

"It's because I can't believe you're not going to leave me again! And here you are, leaving in the middle of a conversation!" Jungkook yelled, his hands gesturing to Jimin who was standing by the room door.

"Tell me what's gonna happen if I don't leave the room." Jimin asked, crossing his arms.

"I don't know! Cuddle maybe?" Jungkook shrugged.

"Yeah, sure. 'Look, Jimin, I don't wanna marry you, but let's cuddle.'" Jimin joked, trying to imitate Jungkook's voice.

"Hey!" Jungkook got up from the bed, walking to Jimin, who took a step back. "You've crossed the line now. I'm not gonna let you out." He said, moving to stand in front of the door, blocking Jimin's way.

"Tell me what's gonna happen if I stay, Jungkook." Jimin said again, moving closer to Jungkook, who had his back resting on the door.

"I'm gonna kiss you." Jungkook breathed, looking down at Jimin with a smile.

"Yeah, sure." Jimin rolled his eyes, knowing Jungkook was joking around.

"You think I'm joking?" Jungkook asked, leaning down more until he was a hair away from Jimin.

"Jungkook."

"Jimin-ah."

Jimin sighed, taking a step back from Jungkook, and going to their bed again. "I'll sleep in your old bed tonight."

"Like hell you are."

"I'm serious."

"Why though?" Jungkook asked, moving away from the door, but not enough for Jimin to slip out and away.

"Because you clearly need space. I can't be with you all the time. You need to think this over. I don't want you to do something or make a decision and regret it." Jimin explained, rolling his eyes again when he noticed Jungkook wouldn't move away from the doorway, so he went to get into bed.

"I want you, okay. I just don't want to think about marriage until I'm sure you're not gonna leave me, once I'm sure, I'll think about marriage all you want." Jungkook defended, going to bed too. "And I was going to make the decision to work on this regardless of how much time it was going to take me to make that decision."

"I think it matters still."

"No, it doesn't."

"Yes, it does. If you take time to make a decision, then you'll be one hundred percent sure of the decision you're taking, but if you don't think about it enough, then you'll always be unsure, just like you are right now." Jimin pointed out, moving away when Jungkook got into bed, not in the mood to cuddle.

"Why." Jungkook whispered when he noticed Jimin move away.

"I don't wanna cuddle." Jimin mumbled, crossing his arms, and looking away.

"Can you please look at it from my perspective? You just told me you ran away before I could propose to you. And if you didn't you would have rejected me. I saw you and me getting married literally next year, but you? You were planning how to break up with me, so you can't blame me now for doubting you, or thinking that you're gonna leave me again." Jungkook almost gritted his teeth trying to get his point across. "You can't get mad because I simply don't see it now. How can I? How can I see something that you just now told me you knew was gonna happen and you ran away before it could. I'm the one who should be mad right now, and instead I'm asking you to cuddle, and you don't want to. Maybe I should be the one to leave and go to my room, huh?" He said, removing the covers.

"No!" Jimin said, holding Jungkook's hand and pulling him back into bed. "Stay. We'll cuddle."

"Okay." Jungkook sighed, still not moving to get closer.

Jimin sighed too, a little loudly, before he scooted over to Jungkook, putting his head on Jungkook's chest. "Can you just please think about it, and take your time thinking it over, and if you still don't see us getting married, please let me know."

"What? You're gonna propose or something?" Jungkook breathed out a laugh, almost scoffing.

Jimin slapped Jungkook's stomach gently. "Shut up, and cuddle me. Let's take a nap."

Sighing again, Jungkook wrapped his arms around Jimin, adjusting himself until they were comfortable. "Alright, I'll think about it." He whispered, closing his eyes.

"Thank you." Jimin whispered back, kissing Jungkook's chest, and closing his eyes after, hoping to dream of a better time, where him and Jungkook weren't hurting.

You're still shining

You're still like a scented flower

Now trust me, hold me again

So I can feel you, hold me

"I love this."

"What? Us naked under the sheets? Or us playing our own songs like narcissists? Or us being in Paris? Oh, please let me know, Jimin-ssi." Jungkook laughed, moving his fingers from Jimin's waist to under his arm to tickle him.

Jimin squealed, laughing loudly. "All of it." He breathed, turning to lay more on top of Jungkook. "I love being with you before all of this, and I specially love our current position, and I love you." He said, rubbing Jungkook's shins with his, his hand moving up and down Jungkook's arm. "It can't get any more perfect."

"Are you sure, Jimin-ssi?" Jungkook raised one eyebrow, his hand moving to his bedside drawer without Jimin noticing.

"Yeah, of course I'm sure. We're in Paris and in love. Our careers are amazing so far. We're on a break traveling all over the world, and we're doing all of that together. We even just finished expressing that love to each other, so-" Jimin's jaw dropped as he looked at what was in Jungkook's hand and then his face. Jimin looked down again at the ring in Jungkook's hand, him being one hundred percent sure it was an engagement ring, and a second later, Jungkook confirmed his assumption.

"Marry me."

Jimin gasped, his hand going to cover his mouth that was still hanging open. "You serious?" He asked, feeling his eyes well up with tears. "Jungkookie, are you serious?"

Nodding, Jungkook felt himself tear up too. "One hundred percent." He whispered. "I love you so much, darling. Please, marry me." He asked, feeling a tear running down his smiling face.

Gasping again, Jimin leaned the rest of the way to Jungkook, kissing him with all the love he felt for him, maybe even more than what they were both feeling half an hour ago, feeling Jungkook's damp eyelashes on his cheeks. "I love you." He muttered between kisses. "So much." He held Jungkook's chin, and then moved his hand to stroke along his cheek, pulling away when he felt himself about to sob.

"Darling." Jungkook called, still holding the ring in his hand, and Jimin hummed. "Will you marry me?" He asked a third time, getting nervous from Jimin not answering him right away.

Jimin laughed, wiping his tears away. "Yes! Yes, of course I'll marry you. Let's do it. Let's get married!" He laughed again between his sobs.

"You'll marry me?!" Jungkook asked, not believing what was happening. "You said yes?!"

Laughing again, Jimin wiped his face for the hundredth time, wiping Jungkook's face too. "Yes, baby. Of course I'll marry you. Who else would I want to get married to? Wake up to for the rest of my life? Cook with? Cook for? Let's get married now." He said seriously, giving his hand to Jungkook to place the ring on his finger, looking down at his hand after. "It's beautiful." He whispered, inspecting the ring closer. "I love it!"

Jungkook sat up, holding Jimin's waist so he could get him to sit on his lap. "Still sure it couldn't get any more perfect?" He laughed, kissing Jimin again repeatedly.

"I'm sure it can't get any more perfect now." He sassed, pulling away to look at Jungkook's face, holding his cheeks. "But as long as I'm with you, it can always get more perfect." He said, before he crashed their lips together, pushing Jungkook to lay down again, until Jungkook turned them around, so he could be the one on top of Jimin, intertwining his left hand with Jimin's right, before he kissed his hand, seeing the ring shining in his hand.

"I love you so much." He said, again and again, kissing Jimin like his life depended on it, holding Jimin's hand, and moving it up beside Jimin's head. "You shine more than that ring." He said, moving to kiss Jimin's cheek and neck.

"Jungkook-ah." Jimin whined.

"Yes?" Jungkook muttered.

"I have an idea to make it more perfect."

Jimin shifted in bed, almost squirming from how much his chest was hurting him, and then he slowly started to wake up, getting more conscious until he opened his eyes.

He looked around in the darkness, not being able to see anything, holding his chest in discomfort, a hollow feeling consuming him, until he felt his knee hit something, and he remembered that Jungkook was right beside him, so he moved closer to him, hugging him in his sleep, still whining from the ache in his chest.

Jungkook groaned, hugging Jimin back in his sleep, slowly waking up when he felt how tightly Jimin was holding him by his shirt.

"Jimin?" He groaned, feeling confused because he didn't even remember going to sleep. All he remembered is Jimin falling asleep on top of him, and his thoughts had consumed him after, unable to pinpoint the exact moment he fell asleep. "Is something wrong?" He asked, feeling Jimin nod. "Bad dream?"

Jimin shook his head. "It wasn't a nightmare, but- but it was bad. It was really bad. I'm so sorry."

"Hey, why are you apologizing?" Jungkook said, his voice croaky, so he cleared his throat.

"I ruined your plans for us. We could have been in Paris right now getting engaged." He whined, turning his face to bury it in Jungkook's shirt, the hollow feeling in his chest getting stronger.

Jungkook froze, and he stopped breathing for a few seconds. "How did you know?"

"How did I know what?" Jimin asked, moving his hand to hold his chest again.

"That I was gonna do it in Paris."

Chills went down Jimin's spine, and it didn't help with the feeling in his chest. "Oh my god." He gasped, moving away from Jungkook, keeping his distance. "I didn't know. It was a dream. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay." Jungkook sighed, reaching to hold Jimin again.

"No! It's not." Jimin snapped, moving away more, and turning around so his back was to Jungkook. "You should hate me. I ruined everything."

"No, you didn't." Jungkook objected, getting angry.

"Yes, I did. I threw away the four years we had because I was scared. We could have been engaged right now, and I ruined it because I was scared. I ruined everything." Jimin said, almost whimpering from how much he was hurting, hitting his chest to try and alleviate the pain.

"No. No." Jungkook whispered, moving closer to Jimin quietly. "Assume you hadn't broken up with me, yes, we would have been engaged right now, I'm with you on that one, but baby, we have issues. You breaking up with me was the only thing that brought our attention to those issues. If you hadn't, we would have still been in a relationship, maybe married, with those issues that we know nothing about, and it would have come up to the surface sooner or later, and god only knows what would have happened then. Maybe we were destined to break up and get back together, instead of getting married and then divorced, right?" He explained, moving the rest of the way, and holding Jimin tightly, not giving him the chance to move away.

"Are you sure?" Jimin croaked.

"Of course I'm sure. We can't keep thinking of what might have been. We only have now to think about, and tomorrow to dream of, okay? So, stop thinking about the past and think about our present. You told me you wouldn't let your doubts affect our relationship, right? So please, no second thoughts. We're in this together." He said, planting a kiss on Jimin's cheek. "Now, tell me what's wrong. Why do you keep holding your chest like that?"

"It hurts." Jimin whimpered, turning on his back when Jungkook pulled him to do so.

"Tell me where, darling." Jungkook put his hand on Jimin's chest, and Jimin moved Jungkook's hand to the exact place that was hurting, feeling him rubbing his chest, and leaning down to kiss it, making him turn his face away, grateful for the darkness, so Jungkook wouldn't see his face turning red. "It'll be alright. No need to hurt." Jungkook whispered, continuing to rub Jimin's chest.

"It's getting better." Jimin sighed in relief, his whole body calming down.

"Yeah?" Jungkook breathed, leaning down to kiss Jimin's chest over his shirt again.

Jimin held the back of Jungkook's head, keeping him in place. "Yeah."

Reaching over from his place on top of Jimin, Jungkook turned Jimin's old night light on, wanting to see Jimin's face.

Jimin blinked up at Jungkook, seeing how sleepy his eyes were, his face puffy. "You're so pretty." He said, his fingers brushing Jungkook's hair away.

"Says you." Jungkook said, brushing his nose with Jimin's. "I really want to kiss you." He whined.

"We'll go to our session tomorrow, and then we'll see." Jimin assured, turning Jungkook's face to kiss his cheek. "This has to do for no-"

"Love birds, dinner is read- Uhh! It's my fault for not knocking!" Taehyung yelled, leaving the door open and running away, making Jimin and Jungkook laugh.

"What happened, bear?"

"I walked in on jikook!"

"What?"

Laughing again, Jimin and Jungkook got up from the bed, going to the bathroom so they could at least wash their faces before going to the kitchen.

"Come on, Taetae. It's not like you walked in on us fuc-"

Taehyung jumped in front of Jimin to clamp a hand on his mouth. "No! Don't say it! You're gonna jinx it!"

Jimin raised his hands up in surrender, until Taehyung removed his hand. "All I'm saying is, we weren't doing anything."

"Jungkook was on top of you."

"We were cuddling."

"Your faces were really close."

"We weren't kissing."

"Sadly." Jungkook chimed in, pulling Jimin to the table so he could sit next to him.

"So as I understood, from the questions you both filled, is that you've been in a relationship for the past four years- well almost four years, Jimin-ssi you broke up with Jungkook-ssi a month ago, and the only big obstacle you've had in your relationship was after the first year and you got past it when Jimin went to therapy, correct?" Shim Cheong said, looking at the papers in front of her.

"Yes." Jungkook said, holding Jimin's hand who was sitting on the love seat beside him.

"Okay, the first session is usually not eventful, we'll just try to understand our current situation more, so we could see how we're gonna work on it, is that okay?"

"Yeah, of course." Jimin said, swallowing nervously.

"I'm just going to talk with you about some of the answers you provided in your sheets. I just need to understand a few things a little bit more."

"Okay." They both nodded, waiting for her to elaborate.

"So under the question that said 'What would you consider to be your biggest problem? When did it start?' Jimin-ssi, you answered 'When I began to dislike myself. I don't know when it happened.' and Jungkook-ssi, you said 'Jimin not believing that he deserves me, when he stopped believing in himself.' can you both elaborate? How about you start, Jungkook-ssi?"

Jungkook cleared his throat, turning to look at Jimin, who nodded at him in assurance. "I guess the biggest problem after we both talked is that Jimin didn't think he deserved to be more than my boyfriend, and when we were getting closer to getting engaged, he broke up with me, so we could say this problem was there all along, there was just nothing to trigger it?" He answered, not sure, so he turned to Jimin again, who nodded at him that he was right.

"What about you, Jimin-ssi?" Cheong asked, putting one of her legs on top of the other.

"When I talked with Jungkookie more about this, and I actually spoke to our leader about it too, they both concluded that I don't like myself enough to think that I deserve Jungkook, or any good thing in my life really. At some point in our break up I stopped eating too, just because I didn't think I deserved that too." He shrugged, feeling Jungkook tighten his hold on his hand.

"Do you see a therapist, Jimin-ssi?"

"Yes, I used to, not currently, but I'm going to get back to seeing my therapist." He nodded to himself. "Might even go back to therapy twice a week."

"That's great actually. It can definitely speed up the process. You should be proud of yourself that you're able to make that decision." Cheong said, tucking her hair behind her ear.

"Yeah, I don't know. It doesn't matter, just as long as me and Jungkookie are okay again." He said, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

"It will take time, but I have a good feeling about the two of you." Cheong smiled before looking at the sheets in her hands again.

"What do you mean by it's gonna take time?" Jungkook asked, a frown on his face, leaning forward.

Cheong shifted in her seat. "How about we finish reviewing your answers, and then I'll explain everything, okay?"

Jungkook sighed. "Yeah, okay." He rested his back against his chair again.

"Okay! So under the question that said 'How confident are you that you can solve your current problems and challenges?' Jungkook-ssi, you said 'Quite.'" she said. "And Jimin-ssi, you said 'Not sure.' Can you elaborate first?"

Jungkook looked down. He already knew Jimin didn't believe in them as much as he did, but it still hurt when it was said so clearly. It wasn't like Jimin didn't want them to be together again, or that Jimin didn't want him. It was just that Jimin had a lot of doubts, about himself and about their relationship, and sometimes those doubts correlated, and he would doubt that it could eventually work out, and they could eventually have their happily ever after.

"I'm scared." Jimin shrugged, not saying anything else.

"What is making you feel scared?" Cheong asked, leaning forward.

"A lot of things really. I'm scared I will try my best and it would not be enough because my best is not necessarily what's enough to fix it. I'm scared Jungkook would one day realise that I'm not-"

"Can you please stop with that?!" Jungkook snapped, removing his hand from Jimin's.

Cheong looked curiously at the two of them, not saying anything.

"Jungkookie." Jimin pleaded, feeling guilty.

"You can't keep thinking like that. I told you enough times you're enough for me. I will never think I need more, not when you're more than enough for me, darling, and it's making me so angry that you wouldn't see that!"

"Jungkook-ssi, may I interrupt?" Cheong asked, looking at Jimin who looked like he was seconds away from crying, and Jungkook who had his whole body turned to Jimin like he was about to bounce.

"Yeah." Jungkook sighed, turning his body to sit properly again.

"You need to fully understand that Jimin-ssi can't turn that thought off in his head. It's going to take a lot of work for him to truly believe that. It's not that he doesn't believe you, it's that he actually doesn't believe himself. He will first have to dismantle his anxieties and then work them through until he will finally realise he is enough for you. You can't just tell him something, and then he'll flip the switch in his head. I know this might be frustrating for you, but it really requires a lot of patience from you, and even more from Jimin-ssi, because while you're waiting for him to work on this, he will be the one waiting on himself to work this through, and it's a lot more frustrating when you're working on yourself and you can't see instant result. So, let's just be calm and patient through this in order for us to move through the process smoothly, okay?"

Jungkook shifted in his seat uncomfortably, a little embarrassed of his outburst. "Sorry." He sighed, before he turned to Jimin. "I'm sorry, Jiminie. I'll be more patient. Please, finish what you were going to say before I interrupted you." Jungkook reached to hold Jimin's hand again, intertwining their fingers this time.

Smiling from ear to ear, Jimin rolled his eyes. "I forgot what I was saying."

"You were saying how you felt like you were not enough and that scared you?" Cheong reminded.

"Oh, yeah. That's it really. I just really want this to work out. I really want for me and Jungkookie to move past this, but I can't help but feel like that's a dream, because this past month I've been living without him in my life so it's hard to imagine us going back to what we had before. I can't really imagine it in my head." Jimin elaborated, feeling like he was breaking his own heart when he knew how Jungkook must feel hearing those words from him, but he couldn't help but say them, especially when it was how he felt, and the truth was the only way they could resolve this.

"Jimin-ssi, it's just like you said. You can't imagine you getting back to your old routine because it's been a whole month without each other, and quite frankly, it won't go back to how it was instantly, so it's not just a feeling you have, it actually is what's going to happen." She said, making Jimin and Jungkook confused. "Jungkook-ssi, can you elaborate on your answer? Do you have anything to add?"

Jungkook's frown deepened. "No, I believe in us, but I know if we don't put work and effort we may not be able to get past this, that's why I said quite and not like, completely sure." He shrugged.

"That's totally understandable." She nodded. "Okay, so on to our next question, 'What have you done or tried to do to promote change?' and you both said the same thing actually, that you're keeping away from each other?" She tilted her head, looking at Jimin and Jungkook's intertwined hands and raising one eyebrow in confusion.

They both laughed softly. "Yeah." Jungkook cleared his throat. "We're not back together." He said.

"Wait, how?" She asked, pointing at their hands.

"Well, according to him, this-" Jimin lifted their hands up. "Is okay, but kissing is not."

"Hey!" Jungkook whined.

Cheong laughed. "I see." She said with a laugh.

"It's a technique to stop us from falling into old habits without working on our problems first." Jimin explained, rubbing Jungkook's hand with his other hand after he had teased him.

"Oh! That's actually smart." Cheong clapped, feeling impressed.

"See! I told you!" Jungkook pulled on Jimin's hand.

"Baby, that's what I said too when you explained it to me." Jimin reminded, resisting the urge to lean across the love seat and kiss Jungkook on the cheek.

"Okay, enough flirting you two. To our next question, 'Do you feel comfortable bringing up concerns in your relationship?' you both said yes, so does this mean you're not scared at all of confrontations with each other?"

Jimin narrowed his eyes in thought. "No, it's because three years ago or more, we had this silly fight, and Jungkookie just left in the middle of it. I was being unreasonable yes, but he should have faced the confrontation, and he didn't. He just put his shoes on, said he's not doing this, and walked out the door, so in fights after this one I kept telling him I won't let you run away just because it's getting tough, so now neither of us are scared of fighting. As long as we talk it out and cuddle at night, then it's okay." He explained, turning to Jungkook for confirmation, and Jungkook nodded.

"That's a positive aspect of your relationship. Not many couples feel comfortable with fighting. They usually get scared one might say something intentionally to hurt the other, or one has an anxious attachment style so they fear fights because they think it means they are going to break up, when a fight is just a fight and not a break up." Cheong provided, crossing out a question on the sheet in her lap.

"Well, this doesn't mean we don't get anxious that the other is going to leave but," Jungkook trailed off, making Jimin turn to look at him in worry.

"Can we elaborate on that?" Cheong asked.

Jungkook gulped in nervousness, glancing at Jimin before he turned to Cheong again. "I-I mean when we fight, I don't necessarily think Jiminie is going to leave me, or was going to leave me per say, but it's more of- I don't know how to word this- you said something about an anxious attached thing?"

"Yes, an anxious attachment style." Cheong corrected.

"That! Yes, I think I have that now." Jungkook nodded to himself, making Jimin widen his eyes and turn to him.

Cheong glanced at Jimin's reaction and then at Jungkook again. "Why do you think that, Jungkook-ssi?"

"Because I-I'm scared too? That Jiminie is going to leave me? But it's for a different reason than Jimin. I-I just- I'm still not sure he's not gonna break up with me again." He finally let out, feeling like he was contradicting himself, when just a minute ago he was talking about how Jimin won't believe that Jungkook will never break up with him, and then the next minute talking about how he feels the exact same way, but in his defence, his fear had already come to life before, and he was scared that the past will repeat itself, but Jimin didn't have any past experience that made him get that fear.

"I see." Cheong mumbled, before scribbling something down in the paper on her lap. "You might have gotten that from the break up, so just because you didn't use to be this way -you didn't feel anxious that Jimin-ssi is going to break up with you before- doesn't mean you don't now, because it has happened, and it's only logical to be scared that it might happen again. It's almost not really an anxious attachment style, but you're only human and you're guarding your heart from heartbreak again." Cheong explained, making Jungkook nod at her words.

Jimin kept quiet, looking down throughout the exchange between Jungkook and Cheong, not saying anything.

"Okay, we have two questions left! The one before the last is 'Do you think you're able to move past this now? Or do you think you need more time?' You, Jungkook-ssi said 'Yes, definitely.' and you, Jimin-ssi said 'I think so.' Can you elaborate first, Jungkook-ssi?"

Jungkook hummed. "Like, Jimin said before, we've decided we're gonna keep away from each other until we know what should be the next step for us, and that's actually because I strongly believe that we need more time to work on this until we can move past this. We still haven't gotten past the issue, yet, and once we do, I think we'll be able to move past this, but as we still haven't, then we still need more time, and it's not like I'm happy about this either, it's-" Jungkook glanced at Jimin with a certain look in his eyes that Jimin wasn't quick enough to catch, but Cheong understood. "I just can't wait for us to get past all of this, and go back to enjoying our relationship." Jungkook continued, smiling to himself.

"I agree with everything he said." Jimin smiled in return, squeezing Jungkook's hand.

"I've never had a couple that was this reciprocal. You're making my day a little bit better, I swear." Cheong laughed, making Jimin and Jungkook laugh with her.

"If it weren't for us wanting to do this the right way, then we wouldn't really be here. We just want to get back together as fast as possible." Jimin explained, wanting to do nothing but pull Jungkook close and love him.

"Yeah." Jungkook sighed, leaning his weight on Jimin's side slightly.

"Okay, we're almost done here. Let me just see the last question for today. Let's see," Cheong smiled, shuffling her papers. "Oh, here it is, these are actually two questions but they were related. The first one was 'Do you trust your partner?' and the second one was, 'What do you feel on a daily basis?' I've connected them because of your answers because you, Jimin-ssi said, 'Yes.' and 'Guilt.' and you, Jungkook-ssi said 'Not fully.' and 'Confusion.' Can you elaborate first, Jungkook-ssi?"

Jungkook held Jimin's hand in his tighter, scared Jimin might let go because of his answers. "Yeah, actually as I've said, I feel like when Jiminie broke up with me, he broke the trust we had, and it just- it happened out of nowhere, so I still am struggling with trusting him, and trusting that this won't happen again, because just like how it happened out of nowhere when I thought all was good, it can happen again, and I just won't know-" A sigh from Jimin interrupted Jungkook, so he stopped talking to look at Jimin, only for Jimin to not even realise he had sighed, still looking down, deep in thought. "Yeah, that's it, but about the confusion part, I still feel like I don't have an answer to what happened, I still don't understand why Jimin broke up with me. Of course I get how his insecurities made him do this, but what even made those insecurities? Where did they come from? When did the issue start? I feel like I deserve an explanation that even Jimin himself can't provide." Jungkook finished, taking a deep breath after.

Cheong hummed, scribbling something on her paper before she rose her head to look at Jungkook. "That's completely okay to feel, that part about not trusting Jimin fully because of what happened, and it actually correlates to what we've said about guarding your heart from heartbreak. It's a process, it takes time, and it doesn't happen over night, and I'm going to explain how we're going to move through it shortly, but we still need to talk more about this first, okay?" She asked, scratching her neck softly.

Jungkook nodded. "Yes, sure."

"Okay, so about the confusion part, we still have not dived into the main issue, which is Jimin's thoughts and what caused him to take the actions that has led to us to being here right now, so unfortunately you won't understand and the confusion won't be cleared, until Jimin goes through with going to therapy just like he promised, or through conversations in which both of you activity listen to each other and try to work through Jimin's thoughts, and I'm going to give you a few tips to make your conversations more insightful, so that will definitely help." She nodded, capping her pen and then uncapping it again.

"That would be great actually." Jungkook said, glancing at Jimin again, who had gotten quiet.

"Jimin-ssi, can you elaborate on your answers now?"

Jimin raised his head up. "Yeah, of course." He smiled sheepishly. "Can you please remind me of the answers I gave?"

"Yeah, sure. It was a yes, you trust Jungkook-ssi, and guilty." Cheong provided, pursing her lips.

"Oh, yeah. I trust Jungkook of course. I have no problem with that, he didn't give me any reason not to, honestly." Jimin said, laughing nervously. "And the guilty part is- it's because I can't shake off the feeling- I just hate what I had done, and it's not just guilt it's regret too. It's been just three days that me and Jungkookie got reunited, but I- I feel so much guilt that it makes me want to run away again, it's just like being a kid again, and running away from responsibilities, it's just like when you do something wrong and instead of fixing it you keep on ruining it again by running away, because that's what's familiar, it's what's comfortable, and you know how it feels, but trying to heal is uncomfortable, it's not- it's a lot of work, and sometimes I feel like it would be easier if I just run away again? Leave? Because I just can't deal with the guilt I feel everyday. Again, I know it's just been three days, but the shame and the guilt are almost enough to make me run away aga-"

"Just do it now." Jungkook whispered, interrupting Jimin.

"What?" Jimin breathed, turning to Jungkook in his seat.

"Do it now, run away now. Leave me!" Jungkook almost yelled, slowly removing his hand from Jimin's.

"Kookie, I'm not going t-"

"If you want to leave me, do it now before we can go any further, before I get my hopes up again. Just do it now." Jungkook interrupted Jimin once again, feeling himself tear up, but he blinked rapidly to stop himself from crying.

"Kookie, I'm not going to! I was just saying that I feel that way! It doesn't mean that I will actually do it! Please, stop being so paranoid!" Jimin protested, his voice raising slightly.

"I don't see the difference! If you feel it, then what's gonna stop you from actually doing it!"

"Maybe the fact that I love you, and I can't go through losing you again?! It's not my fault that I can't help but feel guilty every time I look at your face!" Jimin yelled in frustration, almost forgetting about the fact that they weren't at home, and instead at their counseling session.

"Okay, guys. I think it's time to establish some golden rules. So I have to cut you off." Cheong middled right after writing more in her notes.

Jungkook who was seconds away from crying, and Jimin who was a hair away from walking out the door turned to Cheong.

"So first, as I understood here, we have a few issues, there's Jimin feeling guilty for instance, and then we have Jungkook-ssi, who still struggles with trusting Jimin-ssi, which are big factors in any relationship, and can actually destroy any relationship, and second, we have the situation at hand, which is you both not wanting to get back together right away, and that's actually what's gonna happen. Unfortunately, you will have to separate for a while, you're gonna need to start all over again, as you're missing key elements in your relationship that actually are the foundation of any relationship, and if we don't build a foundation, then the relationship will not work out." Cheong listed off.

Jimin and Jungkook had leaned forward to listen to their counselor attentively, not missing a word.

"You will only hang out one on one, once a week, and it would be preferable if once a week is the only time you will see each other, so definitely no staying together if you currently are. You will have to change things up so you stay at separate places, and then meet every week to have a deep conversation, using certain questions and cues to help you have the most informative conversation you can possibly have. It can be a date if you want," Cheong shrugged. "Or you could just hang out freely, but you're gonna have to take it slow as if you're dating all over again from the start." She cleared up. "Another thing you're gonna have to do, is agree on a signal, so once one of you gets hurt from the other's words, you can use that signal to communicate that your feelings have been hurt, because it may not always be easy to say 'Hey, you just hurt my feelings, please do something about it.' So instead you can go like-" Cheong reached forward to knock on the coffee table, and then shrugged.

Jungkook reached his fist to knock on the table too, throwing Jimin a look after, making him frown in confusion, until he got it.

Cheong nodded at Jungkook. "Exactly." She said. "Jungkook-ssi, I'm gonna need you to take the time apart from Jimin-ssi to think over if you want to really move forward in the relationship or not. I know you have already made the decision to, or else you wouldn't be here, but to be realistic here, it's just been three days, and you haven't processed the trauma from the break up yet, so you definitely need to do that, because unprocessed trauma can have a bad effect on a relationship that's still trying to recover, okay?"

"Yeah, sure." Jungkook sighed, feeling like he was at a doctor's appointment, and he reached the part where the doctor recommends medications and certain diets. It was the part he hated the most in doctor appointments, because why couldn't everything heal itself? Why did we have to work for it? Why can't it magically happen? What did I go to the doctor's for if I'm the one making all the efforts?

"You, Jimin-ssi, will go to therapy as you said, and you're gonna work on the guilt you feel towards Jungkook-ssi. I'm gonna need you to be vocal about your feelings as much as you can, so once you feel guilty or you feel regretful, you're gonna need to tell Jungkook straight away, and discuss it together, and accept what Jungkook-ssi says to you, I'm gonna need you to keep your mind open about this, and I'm sure your therapist will give you a few tips to exercise so I'm not going to, okay?"

Jimin nodded repeatedly, clearing his throat. "Yes. Yeah."

"And our first session is over! Do you have any questions?" Cheong smiled, sorting the papers in her hand.

Jungkook clenched his jaw, trying to pull himself together, and he shook his head. "Yeah, I have one. So, about us getting separated," Jimin said, looking at Jungkook in concern, turning to Cheong once again. "Is it the only way we can fix this?" He asked, trying not to sound desperate.

Cheong sighed. "I'm afraid that's the only way, yeah. You have to take time apart and start over."

Sighing in return, Jimin smiled forcedly. "Alright, that's fine."

"Okay! I'll see you in two weeks." She said excitedly. "Oh! And texting is fine, you don't need to torture yourself all week."

"Can't we lower it to five days instead?" Jungkook finally spoke out, biting his lower lip.

Cheong went quiet for a few seconds, looking at Jimin and Jungkook looking at her desperately, feeling bad for them. She sighed. "Okay." She uttered quietly.

Jimin and Jungkook smiled instantly. "Thank you." Jimin said, standing up and fixing his shirt, going over to shake Cheong's hand, Jungkook following suit.

"I'll see you in two weeks, boys."

"So what do we do now?" Jimin asked, getting in the car.

Jungkook sighed. "I don't know." He said quietly, getting in the passenger seat, and turning his head to the window.

Jimin frowned, looking at Jungkook. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Let's just go home." Jungkook shrugged, crossing his arms, and throwing his head back on the headrest, still looking out the window.

Still frowning, Jimin started to drive to the dorm, staying quiet but still confused.

Pulling into their driveway, Jungkook got out of the car before Jimin could cut off the engine. "Hey!" Jimin called, getting out of the car too, and locking it, before taking long strides to Jungkook who was waiting on the elevator with his arms still crossed.

Not letting anything out but a sigh, Jungkook walked into the elevator when it arrived, leaning on the wall and looking away from Jimin.

Feeling lost, Jimin pressed their floor number, and turned to Jungkook. "You're not gonna tell me what's wrong?"

Jungkook looked down, avoiding looking at Jimin's eyes, and staying quiet, until the elevator arrived at the dorm, so he got out and went into their home, not stopping until he reached their room, and he started to change immediately.

"Jungkookie." Jimin walked into the room, standing in front of Jungkook. "Please, talk to me. I'm sorry if I upset you."

Throwing his shirt on their bed aggressively, Jungkook pulled on his hair in frustration. "You know what really sucks? Is that it doesn't matter because I'm gonna have to leave anyway or you're going to leave or whatever. What really- really sucks, is that we don't even have the time to a-argue or for me to tell you that you've hurt my feelings, or anything for that matter b-because you're leaving me a-again, and I- I can't take it, not again. Please, no." He went to sit on the edge of the bed, covering his face with his hands, and hiding away the few tears that slipped down his cheeks.

Jimin was quick to go on his knees in front of Jungkook. "Baby, we don't have to. We can do whatever we want to do. If you don't want us to do what the counselor said, then I'm more than happy to do that. All I care about is you. If you don't want us to be away from each other then that's what's gonna happen, okay?"

Jungkook pulled his hands away from his face, wiping his tears in the process. "Why? You should be happy you won't have to feel guilty every time you look at my face." He retaliated, his face set in a frown.

"No- No. I didn't mean it like that, Kookie. I just- I can't help but feel guilty because you're the last person I wanted to break, and- and every time I take a look at you I'm reminded of what I have done to you, of the pain I've caused you, and I hate that. I hate that all I've ever wanted was to protect you from anything that could hurt you, and it turned out it was me that hurt you. I can't deal with that, and it's gonna take me some time to stop feeling so guilty about it. I love you, and you have no idea what it does to you to hurt the person you love most in this world." Jimin explained softly, his heart breaking at the state Jungkook was in, and the way he was looking at him. Jungkook looked so utterly in pain, and Jimin wanted to be the one to hurt in his place. "I'm so sorry, baby. Please, don't be upset." He pleaded, leaning down to kiss Jungkook's knee. "I'm sorry."

Wiping another tear swiftly, Jungkook nodded, pulling Jimin up so he could hug him. "I can't take the pain of you leaving me again, p-please." He cried into Jimin's shoulder, holding into him tightly. "I-I know it's the right thing to do, and it's the only way we can make this last, b-but I don't want to do it."

Jimin held Jungkook back just as tightly, planting kisses on his neck. "Neither do I, baby. Neither do I, but we'll text and call each other, okay? And five days are not much. They will pass by quickly, okay?"

Jungkook nodded, sniffing loudly, making Jimin laugh softly. "I'll stay at ours. You stay here at the dorm." He said, not leaving room for arguments.

"Why?"

"Hobi hyung, and Joon hyung miss you, and I'm not gonna leave you alone at our place ever again, and we both need change of scenery." Jungkook explained, still in the same position, not breaking out of Jimin's hug.

"You're not staying at our place alone either. I'm gonna tell Taehyung and Yoongi hyung to stay with you, their things are still packed from their trip, so it won't be a hassle for them." Jimin said with finality, getting up so he was straddling Jungkook on the bed, sitting on his lap, still hugging him.

Jungkook nodded. "Okay." He agreed, not really wanting to stay at their place all alone. He knew it would drive him crazy. "I guess this is goodbye then." He said, feeling sad.

Jimin sighed, pulling his face back so he could look at Jungkook's face directly. "It's see you later." He said, brushing Jungkook's nose with his, stopping himself from leaning all the way and kissing Jungkook.

"I'll see you in five days. Text me?" Jungkook said, looking down at Jimin's lips.

"I will." Jimin whispered, his lips brushing against Jungkook's, who leaned more into Jimin as soon as their lips touched.

"Mhm." Jungkook sighed, staying still.

Not having the power to pull away anymore, Jimin moved the rest of the way, and captured Jungkook's lips, feeling Jungkook sigh with satisfaction.

"I love you." Jungkook whispered, pulling Jimin closer, until the both of them were laying on the bed, Jimin on top of Jungkook, still kissing him, Jungkook feeling a tear tickle the side of his face as it slid down to their sheets, still holding Jimin tightly, and turning them around so they laid on their side.

"I love you more, and I promise we'll be alright."