Chapter 17

GABRIEL

One kiss and he was fucked. He’d known what the results would be before his lips touched hers. He’d known when they spent most of the summer frolicking in the lake. He’d known when he heard Carrigan flirting with her. He’d known when he demanded she help him with some non-existent chore in the kitchen. He’d known before he pulled her into the pantry. He’d known before he teased her lips that Sarah Marshall was going to ruin him. And the way his body was still thrumming with desire, only Sarah Marshall would ease the ache. For eternity.

“Fuck,” he muttered as he slammed the freezer door shut. He had stood in front of the appliance for a long time after replacing the ice cream, hoping that the frozen air would cool his overheated system. All it did was remind him that Sarah was off-limits in more ways than one. And ~that~ reminder was the cold shower his body needed.

“I’m sure that is yours,” Seth said from behind him, making Gabe spin around. He had been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t heard Seth and Amelia enter the kitchen.

“Thanks, Pops.” The little girl beamed, then smiled at Gabe. “Thanks, Gabe.”

He crouched to her level and tapped his cheek, allowing a smile to spread as she kissed it. “You’re welcome, Meerkat.”

With a giggle, she scooped the bowl off the counter and made her way back outside, leaving the men alone. Seth rested his hip against the counter as he crossed his arms across his broad chest, spearing Gabe with the same intense green stare that he shared with Sarah.

“Tell me, Jiminy,” he started slowly. “How come you’re able to make that little girl smile so broadly when she leaves you, but you have her mother in tears every time she leaves you?”

“Sarah was crying?” Gabe frowned, straightening to his full height instantly. At least he was now at eye level with his friend and didn’t feel as intimidated.

“Not that anyone else would know, but ~I~ do.” His tone was cold. “What did you do to her?”

Gabe’s eyes widened at Seth’s growled demand and felt the anger rise. The question should more accurately be, ~what had she done to him~? But fairly, he was the one who was wrong. He had ghosted her after allowing a friendship to develop between them. He had nearly fucked her in the pantry. And then he had told her to date someone else, someone who was as different to him as ice was to fire.

“You asked me not to fuck with her, and this is me not fucking with her.”

Seth’s eyes narrowed as he glared at Gabe. “I told you not to fuck with Amelia.”

Gabe shrugged, his emotions not as casual as his nonchalant expression. “They’re a package deal, Seth. I can’t have one without the other.”

With that, Gabe left the kitchen, not exiting to the yard where the jovial party was happening but through the front door, away from the sight of Carrigan persuading Sarah to go out with him, and from where he would watch her accepting his invite. He made sure the heavy door closed with a resounding thud behind him.

***

Gabe sat on the bench in front of his locker, tying the laces of his black boots as he prepared for his shift on Monday afternoon. Every inch of his body hurt. Training for the special task team was grueling, added to the sleepless nights, the extra hours in the sheriff’s department basement gym, his regular shifts, as well as thoughts of the way Sarah looked before he left the pantry had ~every~ inch of him in pain.

With an impatient huff, he closed his locker and dragged a hand roughly through his hair, pushing it from his forehead irritatedly.

“If that’s the case, then maybe I should keep your ass on desk duty tonight.” Gabe’s head shot up at the voice of Sheriff Burnsley.

“Not if you still want wheels on that comfy desk chair of yours,” Gabe retorted. Though Burnsley could be a formidable force, he had played a vital role in Gabe becoming the man he was. After completing his basic training, Gabe and Seth found themselves under this man’s command. And as both of them had lost their father figures at young ages, he had taken the lost boys and made them men, and not only in terms of their military activities.

Burnsley narrowed his eyes at Gabe before pointing a finger at him. “One, hold that sharp tongue of yours or I will personally remove it. Two, get a shave and a haircut, it’s longer than regulation. Three, get your ass to roll call before I mark you absent because I’m getting so old, I can’t remember one day from the next, and I might forget I saw you here for the shift.”

“Yes, sir, Sheriff Grandpa,” Gabe teased, biting back the grin as he left the locker room, Burnsley’s curses following him down the hallway.

Seth tapped him on the shoulder as he took the chair next to Gabe in the briefing room. Gabe raised an eyebrow at his friend, their abbreviated conversation still cutting deep. Seth placed a sheet of paper in front of Gabe, who frowned as he picked up the drawing of the stick figures in front of a tepee. Their smiles were so wide there was no place on their faces for the rest of their features, but he could identify the three boys by their red hair and Amelia with her blonde pigtails. But it was the crazy grin on the black-haired giant that caught Gabe’s attention. He looked up to find Seth watching him closely.

“You can try as much as you like to walk away, Jiminy, but that little girl is not ready to give up on you.” Seth shrugged before tapping the picture. “Maybe she’s trying to show you that some things are worth fighting for.”

“Seth—” Gabe’s protest was cut off by Sheriff Burnsley calling them to attention. He did the roll call for the shift and then went quiet, looking at each of them with a stern squint.

“Normally, Captain Lucas would do the roll call, but tonight I have something to share with all of you.” Everyone sat up straighter in their chairs. “I was informed this afternoon that Deputy Gabriel Von Ashner has completed his initial training phase with the special task team, and he has passed the course at the top of his class, so to speak.”

The room burst out in loud applause and cheering, Seth slapping him on the back in congratulations.

Burnsley allowed the distraction for a while before holding up his hand for silence. “Gabe can give his speech later. As it is, this will be the last shift that Deputy Von Ashner will be riding with us. As of eight o’clock tomorrow morning, he will be joining his new team. Congratulations, Deputy Grandpa.”

Gabe threw his head back at the sheriff’s jibe and chuckled, nodding as he acknowledged the comeback. He took notes of the rest of the instructions for their shift and sat for a while as he absorbed the news, the room steadily emptying till only the silence remained. He was now part of the specialized team that would be called upon to manage the jobs that would protect his fellow officers and the civilians he pledged to serve and to take the worst elements from the streets. He was excited. But he was also afraid.

During the long weeks of training, he had been on rehearsed events that called for his skills. But he had also been on several actual calls. The adrenaline that had pumped through his system, the array of life-or-death decisions he had needed to make at the call, and the procedures that he had needed to follow were like being back in Gaza, just with a different uniform and a different location. But the same job. And what he feared most was that it had felt more like home than the house he grew up in.

He chewed on his lip as he studied the picture from Amelia. His glitter girl. He felt himself choke up with tears when he realized that he was placing the salvation of his soul on her small shoulders. A soul that was so addicted to taking lives.

He hadn’t realized that Seth was still sitting beside him and startled when he felt his friend’s gentle hand on his shoulder. Gabe quickly cleared his throat as he folded the page and slipped it into his shirt pocket. Seth laid one arm across his shoulders and leaned the other over the table as he turned to face Gabe.

“I know you’re struggling, Gabriel. I know that demons are chasing you because I see them every time I look into your eyes, man.” Seth cleared his own throat. “I appreciate that you’re trying your damnedest to keep them away from Sarah and Amelia, and I know that has been riding you the hardest of all. But remember fifteen years ago, when I lost Ranya and I shattered? The times I couldn’t remember what day it was or my own name? When I rushed into stupid shit, looking for the pain to end?”

Gabe looked at his friend. Those had been dark days for Seth. Two years’ worth of darkness when Gabe had feared he would lose his brother every day that the sun rose. Seth’s feral scream at the news of his daughter’s death still woke Gabe at night, though he’d never admit that to Seth.

“The one constant I had through everything was you, Jiminy. You irritated the hell out of me, but you helped pick up those fragmented pieces and put them together. They might not be the best looking, but shit, they’re together like some ugly-assed tempura bowl. You’re the closest thing I have to a brother, Gabriel, and I get the feeling that I’m losing you. And that scares me more than the worst gunfire we faced together.

“I need you, man. I need you to be my replacement if anything happens to me on the job. You need to be a father to Connor, a shield and support to Indie, and a man that Sarah can depend on, Gabe. You need to keep ~our~ family going if anything happens to me.”

Gabe shook his head, wiping an errant tear from his cheek. He knew Seth loved him, but he hadn’t realized just how much. “Seth, I’m not worthy of being your replacement—”

“I’m calling bullshit, Gabriel!” Seth tapped Gabe’s shirt where he placed Amelia’s drawing. “That little girl thinks you’re worthy. Sarah thinks you are worthy to the point that she turned down a great guy like Carrigan. And I will shoot the person who doesn’t think you deserve their love. I wouldn’t be sitting here, ~begging~ you to get help if I didn’t think you were worthy…my friend, my brother, my very own Jiminy cricket.”

Gabe smiled sadly. “Seems our roles are being reversed, Mad Max.”

“If you two are done bonding, get your asses on the road,” Burnsley ordered gruffly from the door.

“Yes, sir,” they chorused as they made their way out the door.

When Gabe was about to walk away, Burnsley laid his arm across his shoulders and pulled him closer. “Just for the record, Gabriel, if I didn’t think you were worthy, I wouldn’t have accepted your broody ass into my department, no matter how great your entrance scores were. I’m damned proud of you, son.”

“Aww, fuck off you two! I won’t be able to see shit if the two of you keep making me bawl like a baby!” Gabe groused as he tried to blink away the burning tears.

“That’s because you ~are~ a big baby, you chug!” Seth teased as he walked out of the main doors, cutting off Gabe’s retort.