chapter 46

FlashbackAuthor's POVMalar and Alar were sleeping peacefully in their bed, with Thulir having arranged pillows on either side. They had been quite active, playing throughout the day, which is why they were now resting. Otherwise, they would have stayed up with their mother, waiting for their father's arrival.Ensuring they wouldn't fall, she raised the side rails, satisfied with her daughters' bed arrangement. Thulir kissed her daughters' heads and tucked them in with the blanket up to their necks. At two and a half years old, they were very active and mischievous. Malar was the hyperactive one, constantly seeking attention, while Alar was the quiet and serene sibling, yet she was lively and often joined in her sister's antics.Thulir climbed out of bed and gently shut the doors, making no sound. Although she knew her daughters were deep sleepers, she still didn't want to disturb their slumber.It was already 9:30 pm, and he hadn't arrived home yet. She glanced at the wall clock repeatedly, feeling an urge to call him and inquire about his lateness. She didn't want to harbor negative thoughts, yet she couldn't suppress them. Her distress was compounded by his growing distance and avoidance of intimacy.After much internal debate, Thulir reached for her phone to call him. But before she could dial, the doorbell rang. She hurried to the main door, peered through the peephole, saw him, and instantly opened the door.Agathiyan, bending down to remove his shoes and socks, slowly looked up and saw his wife donning a saree for the first time in a while. With a furrowed brow and a shake of his head, he walked into the house, cap in hand, and headed straight to the master bedroom. There, he saw his beloved daughters sleeping. He smiled, then proceeded to the bathroom with track pants and a t-shirt to freshen up and change...Thulir swallowed back her tears, feeling the familiar sting of his indifference. She wiped her eyes and proceeded to the kitchen to set the dining table for his dinner.Soon Agathiyan came back and sat on the chair and served himself while asking her about his daughters and her "Did they both ate?""hmmm""You had your dinner?""hmmm""Seems like Malar and Alar had a busy day; they are now in a deep sleep. I suspect they won't even wake up at midnight. Have you noticed that lately, they both seldom wake up during the night?"He posed the question while taking another bite of chapati. Thulir hummed again, and he noticed. Reminding himself that he needed to talk to her, he refocused his attention back on dinner.After finishing his meal, he proceeded to the kitchen to wash his plate. Taking the initiative, he also washed the remaining dishes, arranging them neatly in their places. Upon exiting the kitchen, he found Thulir still seated in the same spot, observing him with an unreadable expression.Agathiyan sighed and moved towards her. Thulir's eyes followed him. He stood in front of her, and Thulir looked up at him. Agathiyan placed the back of his palm on her forehead to check for a fever. Her gaze still fixed on his, she seemed to intimidate him. He wondered what had happened to her."Let's go to bed Thulir?"He said....or asked her"For what Agathiyaa.....To sleep?"Thulir raised her eyebrows. Agathiyan's brow furrowed, but he nodded in response to her question. Thulir stood up from the chair and walked to the next room which is beside the master bedroom he was confused but followed her.Thulir stood in front of the mirror and began braiding her long, luscious hair......tears brimmed in her eyes which she didn't cared to wipe....Agathiyan who came behind her saw her action which worried him more.....the room was dimly lit only with the night lamp and the moonlight entering through the open window.....Agathiyan stood behind her, Thulir was braiding her hair didn't looked up....the tears slipped from her eyes.....Agathiyan Hugged her from behind....her hands working on her hair halted she looked up through the mirror she can see him.........Thulir gulped her tears....He kissed her shoulder and held her hand and intertwined his fingers in hers...."Yei Theeni Ena dii"That's it , she broke down into tears, turned to him, and embraced him tightly, sobbing uncontrollably as her tears drenched his t-shirt. His heart ached with a pang... He repeatedly asked her what happened and why she was crying, but all his questions were met with her prolonged sobs, which left him restless and heavy-hearted.After a while, her sobs began to subside. He gently lifted her head from his chest, encouraging her to look at him.Her eyes were red, with kohl smudged, eyelids wet, still bearing tears on the brink of falling. Her cheeks were marked with tear tracks, her lips quivered, and her nose was red—she looked like a mess....His beautiful and enchanting mess......Agathiyan cupped her face and wiped her tears with his thumb.....Thulir closed her eyes letting the remaining tears fall out.....She was in his embrace, He pressed his lips on her forehead and it lingered there for few moment till she took a deep breath and pushed him away from her He was taken aback by the unexpected turn of events. Thulir walked past him and seated herself on the bed, prompting him to turn towards her.....Gathering her disheveled hair, she tied it into a loose bun. wiped her tears harshly and took a deep breath, wiped her face with her munthi.....He  was still standing there perplexed with what is happeningThulir looked up at him "Thonganum nu sona la poi Thoongu ethuku inga ninutu iruka ?"(You want to sleep right...go and sleep why are you standing here ?)She spoke harshly, then turned her gaze away from him towards the window, taking deep breaths to control her emotions. Her hands formed tight fists; one clutched her pallu, and the other gripped the bedsheet.Agathiyan sighed, approached her, knelt before her, gently pried open her fist, took her hands in his, and tenderly kissed her hands.She still didn't looked at him....he took a deep breath "Inga ena Paru dii......."(Look at me di)Thulir gulped but didn't looked at him...."Yei Theeni......Nee en mela kovama iruka hurt agiruka nu enaku Theriyuthu ana ethanala nu therila.......nee sona thane enaku theriyum....Ipadi ethum solama apdi alutha naa enadi nenaikurathu.....Valikuthu dii....Please ena nu solu dii "(yei Theeni.....I understand that you are hurt and angry because of my actions, but I don't know exactly what I did. I can only know if you tell me directly. What should I assume from your sobs? It's hurting me too, please, speak up.)He pleaded her...tear slipped from his....Thulir couldn't see him like that.....she gulped and looked down at him.......again tears flow down from her eyes....She took deep breaths to gather her voice to speak...."Did you stopped loving me Agathiya......don't you find me desirable anymore........why are you being distant from me...It hurts me Agathiya.....I can bare anything but your avoidance it kills me every time that you don't like me anymore......I don't know what you think about me for saying this......I miss your touches Agathiya......I am desperate I want you to have sex with me....I don't know how can I ask you more directly than this.....I know you might think me as a desperate women who can't control her body urges.....I am supposed to be ashamed for this but I am not...I am human too Agathiya...I need you....All of you.........I....I "Thulir spoke between her sobs....before she continue her blabbering more Agathiyan captured her lips with his swallowing her sobs.....He could taste her salty tears too which he didn't mind and deepened the kiss more making her breathless........He hovered over her without breaking the kiss....his hands roamed senselessly on her curves, He broke the kiss when she needs air to breath.....he fondled her breast over the  blouse....her saree was already on the floor.....he leaned and swallowed her breast over the fabric and bite it hard making her toes curl arching her body she moaned....He moved up and captured her lips again while his hands kneaded her waist and navel.....her eyes rolled back being crushed under him mercilessly.......She was in daze to realize when he removed every fabric that covered her and his  body and screamed when he entered inside her without any prior notice.....he closed her mouth to stop her screaming further and thrusted inside her in high pace showing no patience....his mouth was attacking her mounds.....she bite his shoulders to control her moans.....They both came together.....and was now panting for air......Agathiyan balanced himself above her not putting all his weight on her and looked at her disheveled self.......Thulir also looked at him in daze she still didn't came down from high....He gripped her chin and again sucked her lips...."You know I want to do this every time I see you...You have no idea how many cold shower I took in these 2 years.....Even today I wanted to ravish you at the doorstep itself after seeing you in that saree.........You don't know how much you turn me on every single moment when you are around me......I rushed to the bathroom to take cold shower only to calm my self not because I didn't noticed you....I was scared to make a move on you......I don't want to make you pregnant again and to make you go through the same struggles again.......I can't see you in pain Thulir and when the reason for that is me it hurts.......That doesn't mean you are undesirable to me.....infact I crave for you more after you becoming mother of my daughters.......You are even more beautiful in my eyes and I couldn't resist you....I kept myself away from you because I don't want to hurt you...I can never stop loving you Thulir.....That's impossible for me.............I know I could have said this before doing you......I think action speaks more than words and you wouldn't have believed my words if I said before........And Now I would make sure you would never doubt that I lost interest in you.....be ready to take my assistance to walk for a week"Agathiyan said in his hoarse voice and started moving inside her.....Thulir eyes rolled back and bit his wrist to stop her moans escaping the room..........