Volume 1 - CH 3.3

Part 3

The meeting among the various departments in Amaburi began at 9 sharp.

Departments such as General Affairs, Accounting, Equipment, Human Resources, Food & Beverage, Security, Planning, and Sales were present along with many others. The area representatives of the park were all present too, with a total staff count of about 25.

A majority of the people assembled today were part of the ‘real’ cast, Latifa and Isuzu’s term for cast members who came from the realm of magic. These included cast members who worked behind the scenes and never got a chance to interact with the guests, along with other members who took all kinds of appearances. Some had body parts of varying proportions, others looked like they came straight out of some TV anime or children’s story. Of course human beings were in the mix as well, but it was still a strange spectacle.

Naturally, Moffle was present for the meeting. After all, he held the title of ‘cast leader’ of Sorcerer’s Hill, taking charge of the cast members who entertained the guests in his area.

The representatives must have heard rumors about Seiya, for they were all watching him in suspicion while listening to him speak. However, each of them expressed concern and disagreement when they heard Seiya’s decision to grant free entry to the park from the next day.

Free entry.

In order to attract more customers, they needed to make everything free of charge. This included the entry fee for the park and attractions, along with all food and beverages.

“I’m against this, fumo,” Moffle immediately objected.

“…And why so?”

“We are professionals in our field, fumo. We can’t just let guests in for free; that would be an insult to the service we provide.”

“You call that customer service?”

Seiya was referring to their first meeting on Sunday. Moffle cleared his throat and faced him.

“…I apologize for my attitude back then, fumo. But even so, if we make everything free it’ll be hard to charge them for a return visit.”

“Hmm…I see.”

Needless to say, that was something he could understand.

“Furthermore, how are we going to cover the cost for these two weeks? Our daily expenses are about 3 million yen, so we’ll be down by 42 million. Who’s going to provide that?”

“We’re already in the red anyway. We’ll deal with it when the time comes.”

Hearing Seiya’s unreasonable argument, Moffle gave a disgusted expression.

“That sum is…”

“Our debt will amount to hundreds of millions if the park collapses. We’d only be adding a fraction to that debt anyway, so don’t worry too much.”

“But…”

“If you were a sailor who lost a ship in a shipwreck, clinging onto a plank for dear life, would you care about the quality of the plank or the owner of it?”

“…”

“This park is sinking. We first get it out of the water before worrying about the land. However…”

Seiya could understand Moffle’s statement about professionals being unwilling to work for free.

“However…you’re right. If you’re against it being free, then let’s change it a little. The entrance fee shall be 30 yen.”

A commotion stirred among the representatives.

“…Why 30 yen, fumo?”

“The park will be celebrating its 30th anniversary. There’s nothing more befitting than a discount like that, and it should do the trick.”

There was a wide range of responses. There were people who understood his motives, and others who scowled in doubt.

“We’ll need advertisements out quick. The ones in charge will stay, the rest are to return to their stations. Dismissed.”

*

“I really can’t stand him, fumo!”

Moffle and gang were heading back to the plaza through the underpass when he vented his anger.

“You heard that? 30 yen, fumo! Our services for 30 yen! Unforgivable!”

“Shouting that out won’t change anything, mi,” said Tiramie, whom Moffle had met up with earlier. He was heading for the plaza too.

One of Tiramie’s attractions, Tiramie’s Music Theatre, was relatively easy to clean, and as such he was also tasked to handle the guests who were denied entry to the park.

“But think of it this way, mi. This is the perfect chance to ask for a hottie’s mail address for ‘giving them a special fee of just 30 yen’.”

“You’re an idiot if you actually believe that’ll work, fumo.”

“Huh, for all you know you might actually get to ‘puff’ someone, mi. It’s only a matter of perseverance and chance! Maybe 1 out of 10 would give me their mail address, and probably 1 out of that 10 would actually meet me. But of course, I’d expect my success rate to be much higher seeing how cute I am, mi~”

“I’m not interested in hearing your pick-up tricks, fumo. You’re always thinking about ‘puffing’ and nothing else!”

Hearing that, Tiramie scratched his fur and gave a deep sigh.

“That’s the problem, mi…a life that does not have ‘puffing’ is no life at all, mi…”

“Whatever. Anyway, I’m just gonna say I’m not particularly fond of that guy, fumo.”

An entrance fee of 30 yen.

Moffle wasn’t so stingy to fret over the money, but the thought of his efforts being valued at 30 yen made his stomach flip. To be fair, Moffle’s conduct was indeed unacceptable during his first meeting with Seiya. He wanted to see how his reaction would be after hearing the news from Isuzu, and that attitude was something he would never show to an ordinary guest.

Well, they’ve certainly got a bright one, and he must have gotten an idea of Moffle’s feelings by now. Yet Seiya continued with that kind of treatment towards him. Moffle could only think of that as his method of revenge. He wasn’t going to bear the disgust and let Seiya insult his past actions.

“Moffle, I…uhh…what was his name again, mi?”

“Kanie Seiya, fumo.”

“Ah yes, Kanie-kun. I’m not opposed to his plans. The park will close if we don’t change our strategies anyway, mi. Now’s not the time to act all stubborn; we’re literally on our knees begging people to let us ‘puff’ them, mi.”

“Cut that vulgar analogy, fumo.”

“But there are times when it went well, mi.”

“What!?”

“No joke, mi. Good for YOU, good for ME. Everything’s PUFFIN’ GOOD, mi! This WORLD’s the best, mi!”

“Heh, so you’re capitalizing your words now, fumo?”

“Yeah! To add emphasis on the crude words, mi.”

The two of them entered the underground storage area located right below the plaza. The words ‘EX-10’ were written on its grey wall.

“To think of it, how’s Macaron, mi?”

“I doubt he can come today, fumo. Cleaning up the ‘Flower Adventure’ is gonna be a real pain, and he’s got a meeting with his lawyer in the evening, fumo.”

“Ah… They’re still fighting over child care support fees, mi?”

“I heard his ex-wife filed a lawsuit against him for defaulting on some payments last year, fumo.”

“That dude’s got it tough, mi.”

Macaron was a divorcee with his kids staying with his ex-wife in Maple Land, making it difficult to meet up with them.

“Macaron often looks at pictures of his children, saying he’ll ‘go and see his kids during his next day-off’, mi. He’ll speak in a bitter tone as if he was able to see his death flag, mi.”

“Don’t worry about it, fumo.”

“Why, mi?”

“Although he mentions his ‘kid’, his daughter is all grown up, fumo. Even if he met her, she’d probably just say ‘Dad, you’re creepy’ or something like that, so I doubt he’d die like that, fumo.”

“What a heartbreaking story, mi.”

They left the storage and headed up to the back stage. Continuing on they arrived in front of the entrance to the plaza, ‘Entrance Square’.

“We’ll be onstage soon, fumo. No more talking.”

“Roger.”

They stood still for a moment and gathered their emotions.

“Mofu.”

“Mi.”

Mumbling their signature phrases to themselves, they stepped on stage, where the eyes of all their guests were on them. From then on, speaking colloquially was strictly prohibited.

Even though it was 10 minutes before the official opening time, they could already see 3 to 4 groups of couples and families there. All of them were most likely upset after seeing the announcement of closure posted on the gate.

“Mofu…”

I’m really sorry, guys. That kid’s selfishness caused a lot of trouble for everyone, making it impossible for you guys to enjoy our attractions today. At the very least, please let us, the top star cast, entertain you all.

Maybe I should begin with juggling? I could start with one ball and slowly add more while dancing at the same time.

…Then let’s go!

“…Shut up!”

“Mofu!”

A young kid pushed Moffle from the side with all his might. Moffle tumbled and the balls scattered around him on the stone floor.

“M-Mofu…”

That kick hurt a lot considering it was from a child. The strength used was about that of a parent, or maybe even a gym teacher.

“I wanted to go to Dejima Land, yet I settled for this place! How could you guys do this? Don’t screw with me, stupid rat! Call Mackey here!”

“Ugh…”

The child continued to swear and kick Moffle persistently.

It hurts, it hurts! Stop it, kiddo! You even demanded that I call Mackey? I’m really gonna kill you. Also, Mackey’s no mascot! He’s just some filthy money face! Anyway, where are your parents? What on earth are they doing?

“Panja-kun[1], don’t do that!”

A woman in her mid-twenties with brown hair came, shouting. She must have been the kid’s mother.

“Mo…Mofu…”

“But mom…”

“You don’t know who’s touched that costume! What if we catch some sort of weird virus or something? Like I said, don’t touch that thing.”

“Okay…got it.”

She pulled her son away, and looked down at Moffle, who was sprawled on the floor.

“Listen up, I won’t forgive you if my child catches some disease! You’d better prepare yourself, or I’ll sue you!”

“Mofu…”

I sincerely apologize for causing trouble. We have been careless on our part, and I fully deserve your son’s beating. I lack the strength and talent, so please use me as your punching bag.

On top of that, you son is called Panja-sama, am I right? What a unique name. He’s sure to have setbacks in the future, but in the long run they’ll make him a better person. Moffle admires him greatly.

It is perfectly understandable for you to worry about your son contracting viruses from this filthy mascot, and I am very sorry for that. So please, hit and scold me to your heart’s content.

“You actually think I’d say that, bitch!?”

Moffle stood up and pushed the woman back.

“Ow! What’s this thing’s problem? Wait, this thing can speak?”

“Mofu…”

A commotion began among the bystanders. Within 5 seconds of her cries, the husband came walking towards them. The young man who looked like a hipster wore a necklace, glasses with smoked lenses, and had a kinky perm on his hair. As he approached them, the jewelry he wore gave a luxurious jingle. He was what people would call a typical DQN[2].

“What the hell’s goin’ on over here?”

“Listen, Takkun! This thing here pushed me over!”

Hearing the woman’s blatant lies made Moffle seethe in anger.

“All I did was give that thing a lecture for upsetting Panja-kun, and yet it had the gall to knock me to the ground. Unreasonable, don’t you think?”

Completely buying all of his wife’s accusations, Takkun turned and glared daggers at Moffle.

“Oh, this stinkin’ rat needs to be taught a lesson, huh?”

“I know, right? Using violence against customers, completely ridiculous!”

“Ridiculous, right? YOU HEARD THAT!?”

The husband began raising his voice. He clenched his fist and pointed at Moffle.

“Hey, shithead! Come over here and take off yer costume! Ya know how to show manners to your customers, dontcha?”

“Customers, huh… Customers are gods, they say, fumo.”

“What’s your problem? I told ya to come at me!”

“It might be true that customers are gods, but it is man’s responsibility to challenge the unreasonable rules gods make, fumo. Even Kratos with his human body declared vengeance and eventually defeated Ares, the god of war.”

“The hell ya talkin’ bout?”

“Even if customers are gods, there are boundaries that should not be crossed. In other words, this is rebellion against a god, fumo. You can strike me with thunder for all I care.”

“Huh, so ya ain’t comin’? Then stay right there, you hear me? I’mma give you a real good lesson. Move and I’ll kill ya.”

Takkun raised his fists and lunged at Moffle.

“Stop it, mi!”

Tiramie was unable to stop them in time, and Moffle’s right paw exploded at Takkun’s chin. No, to be exact, it didn’t explode. Rather, the strike on his chin was so precise, it sniped the consciousness out of his skull. Just like a puppet that had its strings cut, Takkun toppled over to the ground.

“Woa…ah…”

“I won’t lose to people like you, fumo,” Moffle declared to the man who had just regained faint consciousness. “You can just lie there, fumo. Lie there and curse your pitiful self for being unable to do anything but watch me deliver punishment to your wife.”

Moffle walked in front of the woman who fell on her buttocks, and picked up the rubber balls used for juggling.

Putting the doubt on whether the balls could inflict any damage aside, it looked like an executioner who had just picked a torture weapon of his choice.

“Ah…a…”

“You can cry all you want, fumo. But I’ll teach you the fate that befalls those who make an enemy of Amagi Brilliant Park.”

“Ah—!”

“Prepare yourself, customer!”

Moffle grabbed a rubber ball and pulled his paws back like a slingshot.

“Quit your nonsense, stupid rat!”

Out of the blue, Kanie Seiya appeared from the side and sent Moffle flying with his kick.

*

Seiya had never thought that mascot to be such an idiot. He now knew Moffle was one who would create a ruckus if he ever loosened his leash.

Seriously…thank god I decided to check on them.

Seiya gave his sincerest apologies to the family, but to no avail. In turn, they threatened to sue them or write a blog about the incident. Exhausting all other options, they resorted to Isuzu’s magical bullet ‘Forgotten Realm’. With that, the family who had their memories of the face-off wiped clean made their way out of the park, unable to understand what had just happened. There were a number of witnesses during the incident, but they had long since vanished from the scene. All they could do was pray that they kept what they saw under wraps.

“Do you usually do that to normal guests as well!?”

Seiya shouted this at Moffle as they retreated to the backstage.

“…Only on rare occasions, fumo.”

“Rare occasions? Has this happened before?”

“Yes,” said Isuzu.

Tiramie, who accompanied them to the backstage, added, “Happens once every few years, mi. He’s got it tough enduring the abuse from guests, so please forgive him, mi.”

“For god’s sake…”

Seiya’s head hurt.

I never knew of a theme park mascot that hit its guests. What are the police doing?

“We’d be in deep trouble if not for Isuzu’s magical bullet. Now’s really not the time to gather flak from the people. We’ll sink real quick.”

“So you’re saying I should just keep quiet and let them beat me? Even mascots have their pride, fumo!”

“If you consider yourself a professional, then you should feed that pride of yours to the dogs!”

Contrary to Seiya’s expectations, Moffle did not become angrier, but gave a complex emotion instead. His round pupils and facial expression carried grief, reluctance and misery.

“What’s with that face? Did I say something wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong, fumo,” Moffle sighed.

“Professionals must act professionally no matter how their customers treat them. That’s a given, fumo… There’s nothing wrong with that, fumo, but—”

“?”

“—The only people who have the right to say that are…no…nevermind, fumo.”

Moffle became silent, as if concealing something from him.

Seiya had the sudden urge to use his magical powers, the one-time only ability to listen to the heart of the target. But then again, it would be a waste to use it on such a trivial matter like this. He should save it on the off-chance that something big might happen. So Seiya decided to bank on the chance that he might be able to discover Moffle’s weakness someday.

“…Well, my bad, fumo. Guess you should just fire me,” Moffle said, partially regaining his composure.

This rat sure understands his position.

Moffle was the lead mascot of Amagi Brilliant Park. He knew that Seiya would have a hard time managing the cast if he were to be fired. He was basically invulnerable.

Isuzu and Tiramie turned their gazes over to Seiya.

Let’s see now, what’s the best course of action…

Seiya did an analysis of the current situation, placing priority on the responsibilities he had as the manager. He thought about the incident just now and weighed the risks and benefits of keeping him.

Risk-benefit analysis completed.

“I’ll let you off the hook just this once,” Seiya told Moffle with a suppressed voice. “The next time something like this happens, I’ll definitely fire you. Keep that in mind.”