♦⊱ Chapter 19 - Unwanted Expectations ⊰♦

Ruka pov:

I woke up with a groan, uncomfortable with the uneven surface I was asleep on. I opened my eyes only to see a dark ceiling – one I didn't recognize. I sat up with a start, momentarily alarmed by my unrecognizable surroundings but everything that happened last evening rushed through my mind.

I was tense for a few moments but relaxed with a sigh soon enough. I undid my hair tie to run my fingers through my hair a few times. Detangling it as best as I could, I then braided it. I got up from the mattress and walked to the entrance of the cave-room I was in. I looked on either side of the deserted tunnel, contemplating on using this chance to escape and return to Kichiro sama's side...if I ever managed to find my way out of this labyrinth and find him, that is.

I decided to take a chance. I picked a random direction and walked through the tunnels, taking turns here and there while hoping that I wasn't getting more lost than I already was. I didn't know what time it was but I hoped it was a time when no one would hinder my escape.

Luckily, after several more confusing turns, I actually reached the entrance of the cave. Gentle moonlight fell in from the outside, urging me to pick up my pace of walking. I mentally cheered but froze in my tracks just few feet short of the entrance when I heard a voice.

"Where are you going?"

Turning, I saw none other than Tomo kun a few feet from me, watching me with cold, scrutinizing eyes. He had a paper package in his hands and it had crinkled under how tightly he was holding it. I mentally cursed for getting caught but smiled while racking my brain to come up with a believable explanation to this satiation.

"Oh, T-Tomo kun, I just woke up and couldn't go back to sleep so I thought of exploring the cave – you know, exploring for exploring sake," I bumbled like an idiot. He's so not buying this, I thought, but continued, "And I just thought it would be great to take a bath! I haven't washed up since yesterday morning after all."

The annoyance in his eyes was clear but he smiled. He walked up to me and said, "I see. I'm sorry I didn't think of your convenience. I will accompany you to where you can bathe."

As he walked past me, I said awkwardly, "Um, Tomo kun, wouldn't it be better if another girl went with me? I mean, it's, you know..."

He stopped at the entrance of the cave, turning to gaze at me with a rather malicious smile. I couldn't stop from flinching but he ignored it as he said, "It's not safe to go outside alone. Only I will be able to protect you...don't worry though, I won't peek when you're bathing."

He walked out of the cave without another word. I sighed deeply, more in annoyance than anything else. With a shake of my head, I followed him to a clear stream that was just beyond a line of trees. He took a seat at the base of one of the trees and looked up at me while holding out the package in his hands.

"I'll stay here while you bathe. Here's a towel and a new yukata for you."

"Oh, thank you," I responded halfheartedly and took the package from him. I hesitated a bit before walking to the other side of the trees and to the stream. I glanced at the tree behind which Tomo kun was sitting, biting on my lip in uneasiness. I sighed deeply and undressed but couldn't stop from saying, "No peeking!"

"I won't," he answered with a short laugh.

I stepped into the water with a shiver at the coolness of it. I got used to it soon though and waded to the middle where it was about shoulder deep. Everything was silent while I washed off the dirt and sweat on my body and then just soaked. I watched the rippling reflection of the moon and involuntarily reached up to touch the pendant of the chain I had bought merely a few hours ago...I remembered Kichiro sama only to feel the stinging tightness in my chest once again as I longed to see him.

"Ruka?" Tomo kun spoke, shattering the silence that had settled around us. "Don't you think it's about time we got married?"

"Married? What do you mean?" I asked, surprised by his question.

"You had accepted my proposal for the most part half a year ago, remember? Moments before Lord Kurai attacked...you're safe from him now and we're at the perfect age to marry. You turned sixteen a few months ago, didn't you? I'm nineteen, so it's the right time for us to settled down and have a family. I even spoke about it with the others of the Red Eagle and they think it's a brilliant idea!"

I was taken aback by his words, rendered speechless in surprise. Not only was he no longer shy when talking about this matter with me, let alone in general, and it looked to me like he had already planned things out far more than just asking to marry him now. He had rudely refused Akari even before but it so much harsher now, seeing how he had been so rough with her. I did not like this change in him one bit.

"Just think about it, we can get married, have five or six children...wouldn't it be wonderful? We'd be really good parents and teach them to be strong and intelligent like me," he added and I nearly choked on the air.

"C-children?! Tomo kun, aren't you thinking too far ahead?"

"Not really, it is only appropriate to plan our family, right?" he answered. I brought a fist to my lips as a blush in fluster rose. Why was he thinking so far ahead?!

I wanted to tell him that he was being ridiculous, thinking way too far ahead. Not only did I feel that I was too young to married, let alone think of having children, I was also quite sure that I couldn't see Tomo kun in that way. Not after everything that had happened and how long we had been away from each other.

"Besides, do you know how long I have dreamed of holding you in my arms at night?" His voice was husky and his words sent a jolt down my spine. He was really freaking me out now and I didn't want this conversation to continue.

"Um, I'm going to get out of the water now," I said and waded towards the banks. I was sure he understood that I had deliberately changed the subject because he chuckled. I ignored it though and eyed the tree he was behind and said, "Don't peek."

He laughed again, "I won't. I promised, didn't I?"

I dried off with the towel quickly and put on the yukata Tomo kun had given me. It was a pretty yukata, light blue with pink cherry blossoms painted on it. The quality of the fabric was good but not as fine as the silks I wore when with Kichiro sama.

Darn, I was thinking about Kichiro sama far too much today – what was wrong with me? I shook my head and smoothed the wrinkles in the kimono. Inhaling deeply, I said, "I'm done."

With a little shuffling, Tomo kun stepped out from behind the three. He walked up to me, smiling wide as he looked over me, "You look beautiful, Ruka. Let's head back now, hmm?"

There was a hint of annoyance in his tone and I was sure it was because of my earlier attempt to escape as well as because I had changed the topic when he was talking about us getting married. I kept my eyes on the ground as we walked back to the hideout, with him holding my hand in a firm grip.

Everyone in the common area cheered when we entered hand in hand, raising their sake cups in toast. I forced out a small smile in response as I sat down next to Tomo kun. He instructed one of his men to bring us dinner and have their dinner here as well while they discussed the updated on their plans. I remained silent through dinner and remained silent even after while everyone including Tomo kun drank sake.

When most talks were done, Tomo kun poured himself a shot of sake and stood so he could look over everyone in the room. Raising his cup, he said, "I propose a toast for the future! To winning this war against Lord Kurai and making Ruka my wife!"

I looked up at him with wide eyes in horror. While everyone whistled and cheered for Tomo kun, I was dumbstruck at how he had taken the decision of marrying me without even asking me if I was okay with it. He held a hand up to silence the cheering and continued, "All preparations are to be made for a grand wedding – we will have our wedding night in three days!"

The color drained out of my face at that at the obvious meaning behind his words. My heart raced when he met my eyes. He was smiling wide, a possessive glint in his eyes. He sat down only hold my wrist, lean in and place his lips on mine as howls echoed through the room.

His kiss was forceful and reeked of sake. The pungent odor of the sake made my eyes and nose burn. I placed my hands on his chest to push him away though got a displeased growl in response. He tilted his head and kissed me harder but, thankfully, pulled away soon after. I cringed under the look of disapproval he gave me, his eyes sharp. He smiled to cover it up though and turned to our cheering audience.

I averted my eyes to the ground though, my cheek hot in embarrassment. My heart ached too, along with the wish to curl up in some dark corner because of the attention I was getting. Not only were Tomo kun's men cheering, Akari was giving me a glare that could probably bore holds right through me. If looks could kill, I would have been done for by now.

"By the way, Nii sama, what should we do with this piece of junk?"

I looked up though my lashes only to see a man holding up my guitar. My eyes went wide as I momentarily panicked that it would be thrashed if I did take it back.

"Hmm, I'm guessing it's something Lord Kurai gave Ruka. Destroy it," said Tomo kun, nonchalantly.

"No, wait!" I hollered before the man thrashed it on the ground. I sprinted to him and took a hold of my guitar to protect it from more manhandling, "Please, Tomo kun! I had this made on request – it's not a gift and I don't want you to destroy it."

"You got made on request?" he repeated, narrowing his eyes.

"Y-yes! I had to really beg him to make it for me. I love playing this instrument so please don't destroy the only thing that reminds me of home!"

"Something that reminds you of home, hmm? So, how long have you been playing this?" he questioned, as if trying to get proof that I was not lying.

"For almost ten years," I answered. "I love playing it and I'd be really happy if you didn't destroy it. It means a lot to me."

"I see," he said with an amused smile. "Then I assume you wouldn't mind playing a tune for me?"

I tightened my hold on my guitar at the challenging hint his voice had. I nodded though and the man let go of my guitar. I walked to Tomo kun to take a seat beside him, placing the guitar in the right position on my lap. I ran my fingers over the strings once only to notice that they were out of tune. I picked at the strings individually to tune them but it earned scrutiny from Tomo kun.

"Ruka, you shouldn't make a fool of us by pretending to know how to play this instrument when you clearly don't. If you confess the truth now, I won't have to force you into having our wedding night today."

I shuddered at the spite in his words. I inhaled deeply to stay composed though and said, "I'm tuning the strings to the pitches they're supposed to have. Just give me a minute."

He remained silent though I could feel his patience wearing thin with every moment that passed. I hastened tuning the guitar before looking at everyone to see if they were ready. With everyone's attention on me, I started a familiar tune.

Akari pov:

Why? Why did she have to return? Why did that b**** who had taken Tomo kun away from me once return to take him away from me again?! Now my only chance to be with Tomo kun was gone!

More than that, how was she still alive? She was taken by Lord Kurai so she should have been killed a long time ago...how was she still alive and why did she have to appear here now?

Tomo kun had announced his wedding with her, that they would share a bed in just three days. He had made his decision, his choice, and after his wedding, all the love I had for him for the past four years would be nothing more than foolish emotions that were thrown away. How much I wished I could kill Ruka, get rid of her and be with Tomo kun...but that was obviously not possible. Having got her back after more than half a year of being away from her, I'm sure Tomo kun would protect her with all that he had, even stationing some of the other members of the Red Eagle to watch over her for every minute of the day.

My heart ached in sadness and helplessness...but there was nothing I could do to change this.

I watched as she made annoying sounds with a strange looking musical instrument. Tomo kun had made it clear to her that if she had lied about knowing how to play, he would have their wedding night today and then...I didn't know what to do to turn things around to my favor. There was no way I could, right?

After picking at the strings randomly a few more times, she inhaled deeply. She brought her fingers down on the strings and my heart skipped a beat at the melodic tune she began to play. She played slowly for a few short moments, paused, then began again while singing.

"The snow glows white on the mountain night, not a footprint to be seen

A kingdom of isolation, and it looks like I'm the queen

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside

Couldn't keep it in, heaven knows I tried....

Don't let them in, don't let them see

Be the good girl you always had to be

Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know

Well, now they know..."

I could not understand the words she sang but her voice was beautiful. Every note she played resonated through the room and the emotion that filled her voice as she sang had mesmerized everyone. They were watching her with wide eyes while Tomo kun was the most surprised, frozen in place holding his sake cup near his mouth.

"Let it go, let it go, can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go, turn my back and slam the door

And here I'll stand, and here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go, the cold never bothered me anyway.

It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small

And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all

Up here in the cold, thin air, I finally can breathe

I know I left a life behind but I'm too relieved to grieve..."

She swayed to the tune she played while she sang, a smile coming onto her lips as she enjoyed what she was doing. Her singing was so astounding and I knew that I would never be able to match up to her skill. I looked back at Tomo kun, my heart dropping to the pit of my stomach at how he was flushed. His breathing was raspy and he looked ready to claim her as his right this moment.

If he was looking at the other men who were watching Ruka with flushed expressions and nervous glances as well, I could only imagine him telling them to avert his eyes from what was not theirs to see. I looked down to the ground, my eyes stinging and a sharp pain in my chest. No matter what I wished for now, Tomo kun was out of my reach now. I had to give him up forever.

Ruka pov:

"[Chorus]

Standing frozen in the life I've chosen

You won't find me, the past is all behind me

Buried in the snow

[Chorus]

Let it go, yeah yeah

Here I stand

Let it go, let it go..."

I struck the last notes and stayed still till the resonance faded. When I looked up, I blushed at how everyone was staring at me in absolute pin-drop silence. Tomo kun was the first to recover. He reached for me, placed a hand on the back of my head and pushed my face into the crook of his neck while breathing heavily.

"That was beautiful," he said airily. "I cannot believe that I almost doubted you."

I tensed, sucking in a sharp breath when I felt his lips on my neck. He lingered there for a few moments before moving away with a smile. He tucked some strands of hair behind my ears affectionately before looking at the others, "Isn't she unquestionably suitable to be my wife?"

"Of course, she is, Nii sama!"

"There's no doubt about that!"

"You're the perfect pair!"

I resisted from showing any sort of negativity at the comments that came. Tomo kun then looked at me and requested me to play another tune. I played a song that didn't require me to sing. Tomo kun rewarded me with a smile which I returned solely because I was comforted by the melody of the tune I was playing. I glanced at Akari to find her no longer glaring at me but sad, tears collected in her eyes. I knew that it was my fault, because she loved Tomo kun for a very long time and he wanted to be with me. She was here in the Red Eagle Organization, given up the peaceful village life just to be with Tomo kun.

She had supported him in everything but he didn't see that. He wasn't seeing it...because of me. It was ironic how she longed for him while he longed for me but I didn't want to be with him.

I looked down at my guitar, my thoughts once again drifting to Kichiro sama, wishing to go back to him. I wondered if he was looking for me, if he was angry about what happened. Surely he would be angry and I was afraid to face his wrath. But no matter what I would have to face, I just knew that I wanted to go back to him. I wanted to escape from Tomo kun and go back to Kichiro sama.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

O.o WHAT ARE YOU DOING, TOMOKI?!

Oh dear, it looks like Ruka is in quite a pinch at the moment. Tomoki wants to marry her but she's only missing Kichiro sama, wishing to go back to him soon. And darn it, I can't believe her first kiss wasn't with Kichiro sama! >:(

Vote!

Comment!!

:D