Chapter 21

He turned his head slightly, glancing at the medicine that’s left on the bedside table as he clicked his tongue. During which, his grip on her hair did not weaken. Her soft platinum hair was tangled between his fingers. In an attempt to ignore his touch, Deertes glared at Lachlan.

“…Were you deliberately feeding me sleeping pills?”

Recognising the sharp bite behind her words, Lachlan laughed in a low voice.

“Are you trying to ask if I’m a junkie who uses drugs in order to sneak into a girl’s room at night?”

“…”

“There’s no reason for me to do such things. Regardless of whether you’re awake or not doesn’t matter to me. Craig had reported that he’d be using higher dosages of the medication since you’ve been having troubles sleeping at night. You didn’t eat today, are you feeling better?”

“…”

Although his voice sounded friendly, she had instinctively turned her head away. Taking notice of her movements, Lachlan stood up.

Deertes thought he would’ve left the room after that, instead, he returned to the side of her bed. A piece of clothing in one hand, a wet towel in another.

Grabbing her shoulder and lowering down her clothes from a seat beside her, Deertes hit a realisation. She figured out who was the one who had been changing her clothes at night.

“You’re the one who’s been changing the…”

“…You must’ve thought Helen was the one who’s been doing it.”

Deertes was so shocked that she almost bit her tongue in embarrassment. Her face started to heat up, and she started to feel dizzier by the minute.

Pulling down the sleeve of her pajamas from her shoulder, he wiped her neck that’s covered in cold sweat. With every movement, Deertes could feel her throat tighten.

Should I shout?

Though the thought came into mind quickly, it disappeared just as fast after she realised just how stupid of a plan it would be. She was in no position to scream. If she did so, the people of the mansion would just run in and see a natural scene of the mansion’s owner taking care of what’s his.

The towel, soaked in cool water, slowly wiped Deertes’ neck and collarbone. His hand slowly travelled further downwards, reaching for her chest before freezing. He sighed.

With the moon behind him and nothing being able to light his face, Deertes could not make out the expression he was wearing. Nervous, she quickly bit her tongue to keep quiet. If his hand were to travel even further down, it would be at her chest…

Soon, his hand, which had frozen, started to move again. Deertes’ eyes widened as she realised what he was doing. Lachlan’s hand was untying the knot at her shoulder.

Considering her shoulder was injured and moving it, much less lifting it, brings Deertes a lot of pain, her pajamas have been made with such a situation in mind. Her pajamas were two pieces of cloth that were tied together at the shoulders and the waist, allowing for easy removal whilst little movement of the injured areas.

Deertes glanced quickly at Helen who was half asleep, with a pillow propping her up. If the knot were to be loosened, the clothes will…

At that thought, she quickly reached out and grabbed the hand that was moving to untie the string. His hand was hot, skin was rough, and his veins were thick.

“Urk…!”

In a flurry of emotions and thoughts, she moved hurriedly. Her shoulder screamed under its bandages. Still, Deertes could not shake off Lachlan’s hand.

Underneath the piece of cloth, she wasn’t wearing any undergarments. Should they come off, her bare chest would be fully exposed. She started to feel dizzy at the thought.

“Put down your hands, your shoulder must be in a lot of pain.”

“Pl-Please call for Helen. Why would you want to…”

“Helen is with you throughout the day. I can’t possibly let that happen during the night as well. I won’t be rough.”

The moment he finished his words, the string that tied the cloth together was tugged and her clothes fell haplessly to the ground. As soon as she felt the cloth leave her chest, Deertes instinctively brought up her arms and covered her chest.

Deertes clenched her teeth tightly. The sharp pain that shot through her shoulder felt as though a knife was digging into it. Even so, she couldn’t put her hands down. Cold sweat soaked her back.

As Deertes sat there, red with shame, Lachlan proceeded to untie the second knot at the waist. Since Deertes hands were covering her chest, there was nothing she can do to stop him.

“It’s harder to do this now that you’re awake.”

It was a voice that sounded grumpy yet was mixed with laughter. Somehow, his words seemed like a sneer. Deertes scooted back. She could trust the safety of her body in the hands of this man. Lachlan’s hand clasp her neck as he noticed her moving away. She tried pushing him away with her left shoulder.

She could feel the fabrics of the cloth brushing against her skin. The back half of the pajamas that were in Lachlan’s hand landed on the floor in a heap.

“…!”

At that moment, it felt as though lightning had struck her. Heat flared wherever his bare skin touched hers, intensifying as his chest touched her forehead. Fear also coursed through her veins at the fact that she was wearing close to nothing in front of a man.

Although the cold wind that blew past cooled her back, her face was still hot with embarrassment. Now she could not even tell whether she felt cold or hot.

Thump. Thump.

She could feel the faint sound of pulsing at her forehead. Noticing that it wasn’t hers, Deertes was startled upon finding out it was instead Lachlan’s. Immediately, Deertes tried to push him away.

As she moved, Lachlan’s grip tightened in response. Her body tilted slightly. As compared to a moment ago, when her forehead barely touched his chest. Now her entire body: shoulders, chest, and legs are all in his arms.

Now, Deertes could feel his breathing even more prominently. Lachlan’s heart seemed to be beating as fast as hers. No, maybe even more, since he seemed even more nervous than her.

‘Why?’

There they sat, silence hanging between the both of them. Hearts beating quickly, becoming as one.

The mysterious sensation and feeling she felt let her to momentarily forget her fears. As she felt Lachlan’s breath against her ear, she stopped struggling.

“Deertes.”

“…”

Just hearing her name come from his lips made Deertes choke.

“You really… I would’ve never expected you to be here…”

“…”

“You’re… here on this land… in front of me…”

Deertes listened to his words, unable to think of a coherent response. She had felt it in the desert as well. The deep, dark longing he had in his voice. The sort that forged a memory of such in her mind. Deertes felt embarrassed remembering such details.

Witnessing such depth of longing in his voice, she wanted to ask him what had caused him to have that sort of voice but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Why would he call out her name so desperately…

It was then, a thought crossed her mind. The name Deertes had first known him as. The name Criag had told her not to call out loud.

“Cassar?”

“…!”

At that instant, Lachlan’s body flinched, as if he had been struck by lightning. The beating of hearts that used to be synchronised were no longer as one. The beating of his heart seemed to sound louder to Deertes. Lachlan’s heart was beating so fast he felt as if he might explode.

“…Remember?”

“Do you remember me?”

At her words, he pushed her away, turning her to face him. His blue eyes that didn’t lose its glow even in the dark seemed to look at her pleadingly. She could feel her body get hotter as her skin touched his. Deertes suddenly felt afraid at his sudden switch to a serious attitude.

“N-No, it’s not.”

She decided on a straightforward answer.

“I have no idea. We… Have we met somewhere else before?”

Almost instantly after, she could see the glow in his eyes start to dim at her words. He turned his head and ran his hands over his face a few times with a sigh. Even from a  stranger’s point of view, anyone could tell that he was trying to control his embarrassment.

Not long after, Deertes flinched as something cold touched her back. It was then Deertes suddenly remembered what he was in here for.

She yanked the cloth and covered her chest. She was in front of a man she barely knew with little to no clothes on. This in itself was an unforgivable act of a sinner.

Deertes trembled, her breath coming out unevenly. Lachlan’s hoarse voice suddenly came out.

“If you’d prefer if I don’t see it, turn around. I won’t clean the front.”

It wasn’t because she felt embarrassed of her front, instead, it was because if she was facing him for a second longer, she felt he might pull down her hands that covered her chest.

Eventually, Deertes got out from between his hands and turned around.

He seemed adamant on wanting to accomplish his task. So all Deertes could do was follow his instructions and let him finish it as soon as possible. She could only pray from time to pass more quickly.

“Lie down. I can’t wipe it all away if you’re sitting like that.”

“You don’t have to help me wipe it…”

“Lie down.”

Though he didn’t physically force her down, his voice was enough for her to do so. Carefully, she laid down onto the bed. Then, the realization struck her. Deertes was lying stark naked and defenseless with her back facing a man. Everything was on display, from her shoulders to her waist, legs and as well as her buttocks.

Pretending she forgot something, Deertes reached out and grabbed a cloth. She was ashamed of her body that was wholely visible under the moonlight that shone through, and the gaze from the man who would see it. She needed something to cover it all up.

“Deertes.”

As his hand covered hers, she could feel his heavy body pressing onto her back.

His clothes touched the bare skin of her back and waist. The cold sensation of his button gave her a chill.

Lachlan lifted up his body as if realizing it. She could hear the rustling of clothes before taking notice of a dress shirt that soon fell into the pile of clothes that were her pajamas. As soon as she realized it was Lachlan’s clothes, she took in a deep breath.

“I don’t want…”

As she tried to crawl away, she felt a tight grip on both of her wrists.

Lachlan had caught hold of both her wrists. Climbing on top, Deertes could not do a single thing to stop him.

His behaviour was not surprising to her in the slightest. It was clear he had a desire for her, and she had assumed such a thing would occur the day after she took the vow.

But just because he was determined to have his way doesn’t mean I will just sit by and let it happen.

At that moment, something else touched her back. This time, it was not the same cold sensation she had felt moments ago. She could feel its warmth through the thin cloth. Deertes started struggling even more violently. She had never felt such warmth from another person before, much less a man.

Deertes’ body hardened as she was dizzy with heat.

It was then she heard Lachlan’s voice beside her ear.

“Stay still.”