Chapter 24

"An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind." Mahatma Gandhi

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Chapter Twenty – Four

Luke awoke with a start when he heard Jamie scream, "PAPA!" at the top of his lungs. Luke leapt out of the hospital bed that Doctor Whitney had permitted him to use and tore across the hallway in the direction of his son's distress.

Isabella's room, even after Luke had told Jamie not to disturb his mother.

Luke burst into the room and allowed his eyes to focus on the scene before him. Jamie was standing by Isabella, clutching his toy train and crying hysterically. Isabella was unconscious on the floor.

"Isabella!" cried Luke as he rushed to her side. He lifted her slight body into his arms effortlessly and carried her back to the bed. Immediately, he started panicking. Was she still ill? Had there been some sort of relapse regarding Doctor Whitney's original surgery?

Smelling salts. He needed smelling salts. Hopefully she had just fainted. The rational side of him believed that fact. Jamie had surprised her, after all.

"Calm down, Jamie," hushed Luke as he began sifting through the cupboards and drawers in Isabella's room. Fate was on his side when he spied a vinaigrette amongst the potion bottles in one of the drawers.

Luke pulled the small jar from the decorative vinaigrette and removed the small stopped. The pong of vinegar and perfume immediately hit him. He held his breath as he placed the little jar under Isabella's nose.

Isabella's brown eyes snapped open and her nose crinkled. Luke returned the smelling salts to their vinaigrette and discarded it on the side table. He then turned up Isabella's oil lamp.

"Are you alright?" he asked anxiously.

Isabella pinched the bridge of her nose. "I just had the most peculiar dream. I ... I had a child ..."

Luke spied Jamie whimpering across the room, still holding on to his train. He could only be honest with her. He hoped the initial shock was over. "Isabella ... that was not a dream."

Isabella's hand dropped from her face and she stared at him. She then moved her frightened eyes to Jamie. Isabella believed Luke, that was clear, but it was incredibly overwhelming for her.

"I have forgotten my son," she whispered to myself. Isabella's eyes snapped back to Luke. "You made me forget my son," she snapped, her voice laced with anger.

Luke sighed. What could he say? She was right. "Nevertheless, he exists," he said patiently. "I did not want you to find out this way, but Jamie did not listen to me." He frowned. "Perhaps you are better at discipline than I."

"Jamie," repeated Isabella. She looked over at her son, and Luke could have sworn that he saw her face soften. "Your name is Jamie?"

Jamie, still clutching his train, nervously nodded. He dared not look at Luke. It was obvious, no matter how young he was, that Jamie had been naughty.

"Go to bed, Jamie," instructed Luke. "You can visit with Mama tomorrow." Jamie obeyed this time, and quickly trotted from the room.

Isabella folded her hands on her lap and exhaled sadly. "I am a wife. I am a mother. I have a husband and a son. I have people who love me and yet I feel nothing for them."

Her words truly stung Luke. Isabella, in this moment, did not love him. How he had treated her during his recovery at Cassidy House. Isabella had only wanted to tend to him, because she loved him, and he had ignored her in favour of Mary.

But what hurt even more was that she felt nothing for Jamie. From how Isabella had talked about him in her letters, and how she was as a person, anyone could see that she adored and loved that child more than her own life.

"When I was away at sea," Luke said softly, "you were the only parent Jamie knew. You are his mother, and he does not understand that you cannot remember him." Luke prayed some semblance of the old Isabella was inside her somewhere. "So please," he begged, "pretend. You will love him. It is impossible not to. He is your flesh and blood. Everything he is is because of you. Perhaps you will remember yourself through him." What a miracle that would be. Luke took a chance and took one of her hands in his. Immediately he felt Isabella tense, but she did not pull away.

"No child should suffer for the mistakes of their parents," Isabella replied, her voice barely louder than a whisper.

Luke supposed that was better than nothing. "Thank you," he said gratefully.

Isabella looked up at him again, but this time she noticed his state of dress, or rather state of undress. Luke had only been wearing a pair of long johns to bed and had not had a chance to throw on anything else.

Much to Luke's delight, Isabella blushed and looked away. A small spark of hope ignited within him. Perhaps she did not love him, but she could. Their relationship had begun with mutual physical attraction.

"I will let you sleep," Luke said softly, unable to wipe the smile off of his face.

Isabella wriggled down underneath the bedclothes awkwardly.

Luke grinned. He knew Isabella blamed him, and rightly so, but he did feel such an incredible swell of hope. He prayed, that after all they had been through, she might forgive him one day.

***

She had dreamt about him all night. She was still furious beyond belief with him, but that did not stop the images floating in and out of her dreams.

In whatever past life she had had, Isabella had managed to find herself a fine looking husband. Luke looked so powerful unclothed. He had the frame of a warrior, a protector, covered in battle scars ... and he was hers if she would let him.

But inside the warrior's physique was the heart of a man who had not trusted his wife when she had expressed her suspicions over his nurse. His decisions had put his wife in danger, and the consequences were severe.

She wondered if Isabella's marriage had been healthy. Had Isabella been happy? Was Luke good to Isabella? There were so many unknowns.

She woke up as soon as the sunlight started to spill in through her weathered curtains. She felt thoroughly unrested after a restless night.

She sat up in bed and hugged her knees. Thoughts of her husband were gone as she started to think of the little boy that she had so briefly met the night before.

She tried to focus on the features she remembered seeing. Floppy hair. Floppy, blond hair. He needed a haircut. As both his parents were fair, it seemed only right that he would have blond hair. Big eyes. Trusting eyes. It had been too dark to see the colour. She knew that she had brown eyes. She had seen them in the mirror. Did he have brown eyes?

Her hands moved to her middle, and she held them on her flat stomach. Had her stomach really once been swollen with a child? How could she not remember carrying a baby? Birthing a baby? Her baby.

She wondered if there was any evidence of her being with child. She climbed out of bed, careful to not stumble as her legs were still weak. She made it to the mirror in her room, where she proceeded to lift her nightgown to inspect her stomach.

At first she grimaced at the sight. She was so thin. Her legs were like twigs. Her hips bones were far too evident and nearly all of her ribs were visible. But there were lines, faint lines, but they were there. On either side of her belly were faded little lines, evidence of where her skin had stretched to accommodate her son.

She ran her fingers over them. They were different under her touch to that of her normal skin, but they made her smile. There had been a baby in there once.

To be a mother was a sacred thing, was it not?

She wondered what mortal sin she was committing by not loving this child as she should. She would love him. She knew it. He was her child. She was his mother. Her love was what he deserved.

She immediately dropped her nightgown when she heard a knock at her door. "Come in," she said softly.

A nurse entered with her breakfast. Her doctor wanted her to gain weight, but even she felt ill at the amount of food before her. She was to eat a bowl of porridge, fruit, toast and jam, a boiled egg, and tea.

She returned to her bed and began to start on the mountain before her.

"You have visitors, Mrs Cassidy," the nurse informed her as she was leaving. "Shall I permit them?"

At first she was thrown at the mention of her name, her married name. She could not actually recall what they had been calling her before. Perhaps she had not listened.

She nodded. She supposed Luke and her son were wanting to visit again. She smiled. Her son! Her hand instinctively went to her stomach again. "My boy," she whispered to herself.

But it was not Luke and Jamie who entered after the nurse left, but an older couple. She remembered seeing them briefly in the doorway of her room, but she was not introduced to them.

Clearly she was known to them, and she knew them in return.

They both looked tired, the man in particular. He looked rather dreadful. His clothes were worn and patched, his hair was long and unkempt, and his beared was scraggly and untrimmed. But his eyes were brown. She could see them clearly.

The woman looked stressed. Her clothes too were worn and patched. Her greying blonde hair was pulled back into a simple bun and her worried eyes searched her face.

"Isabella, sweetheart, do you remember us?" asked the woman hopefully.

She could guess who they were. They were old enough to be her parents. She could see some of her features in them. But she did not remember them. "I am sorry, no."

Both of their faces fell. Her mother came towards her and sat on the side of her bed. Her father lingered behind. "I am your mother, Isabella," she said gently. "And this is your papa."

What should she say? Nice to meet you. That was ridiculous. With all the heart-warming feelings she had just experienced imagining what it was like to carry her son, she was sure her mother felt the same way.

"I am glad you are come," she decided to say.

"We are so glad to be here," replied her mother. "When I saw the story in the newspaper, I was so horrified. If only we had been able to come sooner."

She furrowed her brows. "I was in the newspaper?" Was Isabella really so important?

"Oh, you do not know?" asked her mother.

"Jane," murmured her father in a warning tone.

"Oh, hush. She has a right to know. You know Annaliese will do anything to paint us in a negative light. Isabella needs to know why we did not come sooner even though she was in the newspaper."

Her eyes widened. Was she estranged from her parents? What problem did Annaliese have? She closed her eyes for a minute. Isabella certainly lived a very complicated life. One thing at a time. "I was in the newspaper?" she repeated.

"Oh, it was such a big story, dear. You know how the newspapers get when they catch wind of gossip, especially when it concerns such a rich family like the Cassidys," gushed Jane. Jane placed a hand on hers reassuringly. "Just know that if I had found out sooner, I would have acted differently. I am ashamed at the time it took me to realise just who Mary was. Lord, what could have happened to that boy of yours if I had not realised who he was when I did."

She could not process the information quickly enough. Her heart rate started to quicken. "What happened to my son?" she gasped, the fear and panic evident in her voice. She tried to recall every inch of his little body from the dark room the night before. He did not look injured or ill. Was he hurt? Had he been hurt?

Jane furrowed her eyebrows. "Don't you know, Isabella? Jamie was snatched by that woman. She put you in this hospital bed, pushed you down the stairs, I believe, after stabbing Captain Cassidy and kidnapping Jamie."

Jamie kidnapped. Luke stabbed. What had happened? What had this woman, this evil woman done to her family?

"Calm down, dear. All is well," soothed Jane. "Mary had Jamie for months. I am ashamed to admit that I employed her as a seamstress. She pretended that she was a widow, and he was her son. There was always something about him, though. He reminded me of someone. That someone, obviously, was you."

She wanted him. She wanted her boy right in front of her. She wanted to hold him, and love him.

"The search was so extensive," continued Jane. "The police, Captain Cassidy's navy men, everyone was searching for him. It was I who recovered him in the end." Jane sighed, though she looked proud of herself. "He was close to death, I am afraid."

She wanted to vomit.

"But I recovered him, I was able to get him away from Mary and to a doctor. Just in time. That was when Captain Cassidy found us. He was at the same hospital for his surgery."

"Surgery?" she managed to choke out.

Jane smiled fondly. "I am sure he will tell you about it, but he told me on the journey that the surgery was something he needed to do. He could not face you as a blind man who had not helped to recover you child. It was a very dangerous procedure, I understand. But you would have loved it, Isabella. I was lucky enough to witness it. The first time Captain Cassidy laid eyes on his son. It was as if he had seen the light. He is a good man, your husband. He helped Papa and me out of a dire situation, and he loves your boy, and you, more than anything." Jane looked back her husband knowingly. "We knew it years ago that Captain Cassidy was someone special, even if we wanted more for you. You would have your way, and you have chosen well."

While she heard such wonderful things about her husband, all she could comprehend was the dreadful things. Jamie had been kidnapped, and had been close to death. Her husband had been stabbed, how badly, she did not know. She thought back to the scars she had seen on his torso the night before that she had attributed to battle. One of them, the largest, had to have been a stab wound.

Her life had been splashed about the papers as her family, the police, and the navy scoured the country in search of her missing son.

Her mother had been the one to recover him, after employing the woman who had nearly cost her husband, her son, and herself their lives.

Luke had had some sort of dangerous surgery in order to appease her in some way. Was Isabella that sort of person? Would Isabella have preferred her husband risk his life in a dangerous surgery just to please her?

Maybe ... maybe she had condemned Luke too quickly.

At that moment, her door swung open and Annaliese marched in with a scowl on her face. "I thought I told you both to leave well alone," she snapped. "Isabella is no longer your concern."

Jane glared at Annaliese with true animosity.

Were Isabella not so preoccupied with the information she had just learned, she would have been more interested at the conflict between her sister and mother.

"Just because you decided to turn your back on the parents who raised you, Annaliese, it does not mean that Isabella has to," retorted Jane curtly.

Annaliese scoffed and placed her hands on her hips. "Oh, and remind me of the last time you wrote to Isabella?"

"How do I know you do not just toss my letters in the fire?"

She could not take any more arguing. "Enough!" she shouted.

Annaliese and Jane both stopped bickering and turned to her.

"I want to speak to Luke and Jamie," she said firmly. "And I want you all to leave. If I had known that you all hated each other then I might have stayed sleeping a little longer," she snapped. "Life is too unpredictable to be so childish! Look at what happened to me, to my husband, to my son!" she exclaimed. "Sort out your differences before it is too late."

Both her mother and sister were silent. They both looked uncomfortable.

"Go away and fetch Luke and Jamie."

Jane got up off the bed, and murmured to her husband to leave. Annaliese followed suit, awkwardly accompanying her parents.

She smiled, proud of herself. "I really am a mother," she remarked.

But she did need to speak to Luke, and she wanted to thoroughly check over Jamie. They needed to have a proper conversation, and one where she did not need to be sedated.

---

MERRY CHRISTMAS HAPPY NEW YEAR AND EVERYTHING I MISSED SINCE WE LAST SPOKE!

Aaaaaannnd I'm back. Between this line and the line above it's been an hour and forty minutes because my drunk little brother called me to go and pick him up from the middle of nowhere. Not only that, but he insisted I take him on a Maccas run before we went home.

For those of you who aren't Australian, a Maccas Run is an ancient Australian proverb meaning "a trip to McDonald's taken when one is drunk/hungover usually between the hours of 12am and 6am".

And of course he insisted on getting hashbrowns on top of his double quarter pounder (cue vomit) we got parked and had to wait like 20 mins while they fried the things and served other customers.

Gotta say, the Maccas carpark on a Friday night is a lively one, filled with Ubers containing intoxicated fellow humans :)

I do have a life, I promise. I went to see "Passengers" tonight. Not sure about that one. Love Chris Pratt and Jennifer Lawrence, just thought the plot was missing some bad guys and some action lol.

I'm seeing "Moana" on Tuesday. Anyone seen that one? No spoilers! But what did you think? I've got no idea what it's about and I've seen the trailer on TV a thousand times. But I was like that with "Frozen" and loved that one. Anything Disney and I'm there. Which is why I'm pumped for "Beauty and the Beast". My all time favourite Disney movie!

Anyways, thanks for your patience with me over the last 7 or so weeks. I work in retail which I'm sure you know, which meant crazy long hours in which I practically didn't see my family for ages. My brother works nights and I work days so we literally did not see each other for weeks. Christmas Day was lovely and relaxing and mum cooked up a storm in the kitchen. She hates cooking so it's a treat when she does hehe.

New Years I watched Die Hard and played a drinking game with some friends.

Woke up with hangover. Great start to 2017 hehe.

Then my cousin got married! I did the makeup for her and the bridesmaids and I was so stressed about it because these photos are the ones she will have forever but I am so so happy with how it turned out! She looked amazing if I do say so myself!! I would love to post one of the professional photos but they don't belong to me so I can't :(

And then my grandparents were here for a week and they've only just left, so I finally have time to write - hallelujah! Big few weeks!

I hope you all had lovely Christmases and New Years and are sticking to your resolutions! I'm doing well with mine for a change haha!

One of them is to throw kindness around like confetti. I hate my job, but it pays, so I've gotta suck it up and throw kindness around to me bosses and hope they treat me right :P

I also haven't spent any money on makeup thus far in 2017 which is big for me! Although my Brow Whiz ran out this week so my brows are so not on fleek at the moment so I need to spend some money there lol. (Over plucked in high school and now full brows are the done thing).

That's pretty much life lately at the moment, my loves.

I have one final assignment due before I'm on holidays so I will HOPEFULLY get another chapter up over the weekend. If not, it might be about a week, but it won't be as long as this one.

Have a beautiful weekend.

Love xxxx