Despair

At the school gate, I stood next to a sign with words written as 'Sacred Diamond Primary School'. As the school bell rang, a bunch of students came out from school, they were all chattering in smiley faces, I searched left and right for Alfie but I couldn't see him. As more students left school, I waited for another couples of minutes, like around a quarter or more. But still, there was not any sign of him, not even his shadow. I started to get impatient and stride past the school gate and tried to search near the school's main entrance. Yet, he was not there.

"Where is Alfie?" I wondered.

All of a sudden, I heard someone talking or should I say arguing? The voices came from the back turning corner of the school's backyard, on the right of the school entrance. As curiosity filled my heart, I let my back against the wall corner to eavesdrop on their conversations.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."

Instantly, there was a sobbing, quick, fragile voice rung into my head, I recognized that voice, it was a voice that I was most familiar with. It was Alfie. It seemed that Alfie was apologizing to someone but I didn't know why. A bunch of questions scrambled in my mind, my brain was completely blank. I didn't understand what was going on and kept on listening. There was another sharp voice sliced the air.

"You're really annoying, Alfie! Don't think that you got good grades and you can do anything you want!" a young boy's voice barked. I still didn't understand what was going on so I turned my head and gazed behind the turning corner of the wall.

At that moment, I finally understood why Alfie didn't want me to go to school.

There, Alfie was lending against the wall, his collar was being held tightly by another boy's hand. The laces of his schoolbag were hanging on his arm firmly and created a significant red scar. As Alfie was being grabbed higher, his schoolbag slipped out from his arm and dropped on the ground, making a heavy sound. The boy who held on to Alfie's collar pushed Alfie towards the wall, allowing Alfie's elbow to hit just exactly right at the rough wall, the skin near the elbow started to turn red, many purple-black bruises surrounded his arm. There were traces of cuts and bleeding shown on Alfie's knees, I predicted he must had fallen down on the ground and his knees hit on the rugged ground. I didn't dare to look, it was horrible. I looked at his face instead. There was a big red swelling on Alfie's face, near his right cheek, he was being punched on the face hard. As I observed him more, my heart shattered in pieces, I eventually couldn't stand it anymore and ran towards the bully, screaming.

"How dare you hurt Alfie!" I grabbed my fist and punched the young boy who grabbed Alfie's collar earlier.

But strangely, my hand went through the bully's face.

I felt weird and punched him again and again and again.

Still, none of my punches reached the bully.

The boy couldn't even see me, he ignored my existence and continued to punch Alfie.

I watched him hurting Alfie and insulting him in bad words.

But I can't do anything.

I can't punch him back.

I can't even touch the bully.

Well, of course, I can't touch him......

After all......

I'm a ghost.

A short while later, the bullies got bored in bullying Alfie and went away. I floated near Alfie and tried to open my mouth. I wanted to apologize to him, but I couldn't. What is the use of apologizing, anyway? An apology doesn't even worth a penny.

"Alfie, I......" I spoke softly. Alfie looked upon me, there was blood leaking out from his lips, he must have bitten his lips hard when he was being punched.

"You don't have to apologize. It's not your fault," Alfie comforted me. Desperate in these circumstances, I wondered why he still cared about me even though I just stood there and watched him being bullied.

"Alfie......why aren't you angry?" I asked.

"Angry? Why?"

"Alfie.....you gave me everything. At first, I showed up in your room without knowing anything, not even my own name, but you gave me one. I learned a lot of things from you and had a wonderful time. You gave me too much but I can't even punch the guy.......when you are in need.....I can't even do anything."

"Jay....." Alfie saw me feeling desperate, he smiled and looked at me.

"If you are thinking to repay me, you don't have to. You've done enough already."

"Before I met you, I was lonely all the time. At home, Mom and Dad were always busy at work, I could only play with myself. There were even nights that they didn't come home, on those days, I got nightmares, I could only crawl under my blanket and cried alone. At school, many people disliked me and often bullied me, because of that, I don't even have a single friend at school. But on that day, you appeared. Even though you simply just played board games with me, I was really happy. That's when I thought I finally have a friend and a true family member."

"You said I should be angry. But I'm not angry."

"I'm happy."

"I'm happy to know that there is someone who cares about me in this world." stated Alfie with a bitter smile on his face. Sometimes I doubt whether he is really a small kid, he is much more mature than anyone which makes me heartbreak.

"Alfie, let's go home. There is a first aid kit at home, we should treat your wounds first." I suggested, lighten myself up. As I turned around, something round and shiny was reflected by the sunlight and hit my eye. My skin shivered.

In front of me, there was a short black-haired thin boy hiding behind the turning corner of the school and his hands holding a notebook.

"Why is he holding a notebook?" I questioned. Words slipped out from my tongue.

"Notebook? What do you mean notebook?" Walking near, Alfie asked as he stared in the direction where I was looking, his eyes went wide and darkened.

Ignoring us, the thin boy felt thrilled as he gazed at his notebook. He just saw Alfie talking to someone......well.....Alfie was talking to the air.

"This is amazing! It's Christmas! The title of this news will be 'A guy that can talk to ghosts?!'.... oh my......this will be the best news I have! I'm certain this news will set the world on fire!" The thin boy shrieked in happiness, driving me up the wall.

That jerk! He saw Alfie! I'm not letting him go away!

I took one step and aimed at the boy, but Alfie stopped me.

"Jay, wait! You don't have to chase him." said Alfie.

"Huh?! What are you talking about? We can't just let him go! He will then tell the others you can talk to ghosts!"

"It's fine. I don't really care about it anymore." said Alfie, there was not any glow in his eyes. He is trying to give up on everything.

"Alfie....stop it. I know it is all my fault. You're right. I should never go to school. Now everyone knows you can talk to ghosts! There will be even more gossip! This is all because of me..." I regretted.

"Jay. It's not your fault. I should explain to you more about school in the first place. Besides, we can't change anything that has happened," Alfie comforted.

Argh...What am I doing?

I should be the one who cheered him up, but he's the one cheering me up now. He is in serious trouble now, but why can he still care about others? He is so kind and generous, yet, why he should experience this kind of pain?

He doesn't deserve this.

I must do something.

Alfie, I'm just a ghost. I, perhaps, can't do anything.

But at least....the very least.....

Let me protect you.