12. Desire

Chapter Soundtrack:

Chainsmokers ft Daya - Dont Let Me Down

[Acoustic Cover]

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Warning!

This chapter contains steamy material.

However...

This public chapter is not the smutt you want. Its poetic love.. imaginitive. For rating purposes for wattpad.

If you want to read the original version, the one with erotica in it..you need to FOLLOW my profile THEN find my other book under my works titled, Freak Nasty..

Once you add this book to your profile, you can go find the chapter in the index but dont go to it immediately.

Wait until you see my authors note mid-story saying to go ahead and flip there. That is where the chapter picks up!

Remember to come back to this chapter.. in the original book to VOTE and Comment and read the A/N at the bottom!

Msg me if you're confused!

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Nova

The moon was the only light now.. Sun had gone and the stars were left twinkling above. Like diamonds.

A full moon...

Its hard for a wolf to control themselves on a full moon.

It was like I've crashed and hit a wall.

My teeth were out, elongated and ready to sink into Zaryn's skin as I watched him with my wolf's eyes. His teeth were out. Sitting beside me, he watched my every move, calculating.

As I sniffed the air, smelling Grace's scent, my wolf surged. She let out a growl, jumping on top of Zaryn as he lay still, calm. My teeth scraped against the soft flesh at his neck, pressing into his skin as my wolf let out soft low growls, warning Zaryn not to move.

It was as if I was watching from a looking glass, my mate and my wolf having an intense moment. Zaryn's teeth were still out but his wolf was still inside. He hasn't lost control like I.. I was the one being affected by the moon and my wolf's desire to take what's ours.

I need a miracle right now.

Zaryn took a deep breath, his alpha instincts taking a back seat as his mate desired to claim what was hers.. It's as if he wants it.

I needed him.

My wolf pressed her teeth into him a little more and he let out a soft moan, ready for what I was about to do. For what my wolf was about to do.

The wind picked up and I smelled something... Something in the trees that smelled familiar but at the same time it was hidden... A masked scent. My wolf became nervous and pulled back inside, throwing me out to the surface and my eyes changed back to their bright green human eyes...

I gasped with the surge of my wolf being drawn back in and lifted my head in a panic, hoping I didn't do much damage and actually knick the skin.

That wouldn't be a full bond but it would be a slight one.. A string of a bond compared to a thick band of one..

Zaryn moved his head down to look up at me, heart thrumming in his chest. Our eyes met, mine with panic and his own blue ones filled with slight disappointment.

"Nova.." He whispered. I moved away quickly, noting his skin was as if nothing had touched it. Righting myself up, I kept my focus straight forward, looking out onto the pack lands and the water of the lake.

"You were going to let me.." My voice came out hoarse. Zaryn took a breath before sitting up beside me, not looking at me.

"I wanted you to at the moment. It excited me. And my wolf..."

"You should have stopped me. You're an alpha blood you could have." I whispered.

"I'm sorry." He sighed deeply. "What made you stop? To gain control?"

I froze, remembering the scent I caught in the woods.. "There was a scent. Coming from the woods.. It was masked but the underlying tone was familiar.." I whispered, looking behind us for any sign someone was around. Zaryn stilled, sniffing the air. "Whatever it was its gone now."

I shook my head, getting up from my spot. Without a word, Zaryn grabbed my hand, pulling me back down to the ground as his pleading blue eyes found mine.

"Please don't leave." He begged.

I let out an exasperated huff. "I can't be here. Her scent on you is driving my wolf crazy. I'll do something we both will regret if I stay."

He took my hand in his, sparks invading my blood stream as they made their way to my heart, allowing my skin to feel that insane heat. I gasped for breath with the intense feeling.

"Nova let me explain. Grace's scent.. It was on me because when she found me earlier, she clung to me, saying she was worried about me because I disappeared last night. She said she wanted to talk to me, she was crying over the fact your brother is her mate.. She said she doesn't want a mate now, in her condition. I didn't touch her only to pry her off of me." He explained. I felt relief but I also felt enraged over the fact that Grace felt nothing over her bond with Nic.. That she loathed it.

Curious ..

I sighed, rubbing my eyes. "This is too much Zaryn."

His hand grabbed mine once more and I felt that surge again... It was starting to become familiar. He tugged on me until I was in his arms and fell back into the clovers with his arm behind my back. I struggled to move but his strong arms held me tight.

"Nova. Don't fight me. I'm telling you the truth. The only scent I want on me is yours."

I had a hard time believing that when he was the one to make sure we were showered and scent free before returning to the pack this morning. Of course I would have suggested it but I didn't need to because he was already thinking of it.

"Zaryn let me go." I gritted out. He had no right to me. No claim.

He inhaled slowly before moving, leaning over me and capturing me underneath him, arms caging me in on either side. Blue eyes stared into mine as I inhaled slowly, taking his scent into my lungs. Grace could still be scented on him but barely. It was as if her scent was dissipating the more he was touching my skin.

His eyes searched mine, pulling my soul out to meet his.. Eyes traced down my face landing on my lips and my heart sped up, beating like a hummingbirds wings in my chest.

"Zaryn...." It was whispered into the cool night air.

He paid no mind as he lowered himself, lips capturing mine.. Tasting them as he pulled my bottom lip in between his, sucking on it. As much as I didn't want to kiss him, my soul did. My wolf did. Butterflies crept down low in my belly and I opened my mouth for him in a breathless moan, allowing his tongue to seek entrance, tasting my mouth. I moaned out once more, my hand fisting in his hair as he devoured me, tongue gracing every crevice inside my mouth. He tasted like vanilla sugar, sweet.

He pressed his body against mine, wedging himself between my legs. The heat from his touch sent shivers through my core, muscles clenching inside me as my desire spread through me, wetting my panties. I pressed my lower half into him further, eliciting a groan from him.

The sound of twigs snapping through the trees had my mind becoming alert as well as Zaryn. He broke our kiss, popping up as his eyes scanned the wooded thicket. This pause was enough for me to regain control of my thoughts, pushing him off of me and sitting upright.

"Someone is here Zaryn. Were running out of time." I whispered to him. The only sound besides our breathing was the waterfall which fell many feet below us in a continuous splash at the lakes surface.

"Shhh" he shushed me, creeping away from me as he sniffed the air, trying to catch a scent. Before my eyes he transformed into his wolf, swinging his head my way, nose pressing into my arm in a silent gesture for me to stay where I'm at. I nodded in reply and he raced off into the woods without making a sound, strong large paws sinking into clovers as he ran. For such a big wolf he was stealthy... Able to stay quiet despite his massiveness. Like a ninja wearing a wolf's fur.

I sat there not moving, waiting. Looking out onto the water down below me, the moon shone on the lakes surface... Its image vibrating from the disrupting down poor of the waterfall.

The air was warm but the cool breeze made it feel perfect against my skin which was now hot from Zaryn's touch. The touch that I had told myself I would not feel again yet here I am with him , letting him taste my lips again. My head fell in shame. I can't do this anymore. I can't allow my wolf to take what she wants through my body.

Moments later Zaryn came running back into the small clearing, haulting as soon as he reached the creek that I was sitting at. I turned, facing his sleek gray and white wolf with bright blue eyes. He gave me a wolf's smile, tongue hanging out. He was too adorable not to smile at.

"Shift Zaryn. Tell me what you found. Was there anyone there?" I whisperer nervously.

He shifted instantly, no clothes to cover himself since his previous ones were torn from the first shift. I averted my eyes once they came in contact with his finely muscular and sculpted body.. His member was very large for a male of his size and age. I kept my eyes straight ahead but my wolf wanted to admire him.. Every inch of him. I wouldn't let her.

He sat next to me, naked, and grabbed my hand in his. "I didn't find any trace of anyone else. There was a faint scent but I couldn't pin point it. It was probably from earlier in the day. Lots of rabbits are out so there's nothing to worry over Nova." His voice was husky.

I gulped, feeling fire spread through me at the mere thought of him naked beside me. He was the most beautiful specimen I had ever seen... His hand clutching mine sent electricity straight to my lower region.

"Zaryn don't you have any clothes in the woods?" My voice broke at the end. I silently cringed at how my voice sounded...

He let out a breathy laugh. "Not here. I have some closer to the pack house down below. Why? Are you embarrassed?" He was amused...

I snatched my hand out of his grasp and turned to glare at him. "No.. I just think it would be appropriate considering..."

"Considering you want me and I want you?" He teased. "You can look. I don't mind. You can also touch if you want.."

"Zaryn! " I gaped at him before finding myself glancing down at his hard chest which went down to washboard abs and then down to his erect member standing tall. My eyes widened and I instantly felt heat creep into my cheeks as I looked away quickly. He chuckled in response.

"Sorry Nova. Its the side affects of being close to you." I watched out of my perriphrial as he stood up beside me, taking my hand and tugging for me to stand. I sighed, standing up and turned to look into his eyes which held emotions I have only ever seen from him.

Wonder.

Lust.

Want.

"Nova I want to show you something .. Follow me." He tugged on my hand for me to follow and I did. I tried not to pay attention to the glorious muscles flexing in his ass but found myself glancing ever so often as he led me through the wooded forest behind us, away from the trail that led back to the pack house.

Moments later he stopped. He turned to face me, hands on my hips as he smiled down at me flashing his perfect white teeth.

"Look up." He smirked.

I tilted my head back, glancing up into the tree tops, seeing a good sized tree house at the very top of a giant oak tree. My mouth fell open as I glanced back down at Zaryn.

"When did this get here?" I asked with wonder. I know these woods.. I have never seen this here.

He smiled a knowing smile. "I built this myself when I was fourteen. No one knows about it aside from your brother. He helped. We told no one about it. He's forgotten about it all these years. Come. I want to show you."

Unsure, I bit my lip. "Are there clothes up there for you to wear?" I rose a brow.

He chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. "Let's find out."

He took my hand and placed it on the first ladder rung which was a block of wood nailed into the tree. I glanced back at him, unsure.

"Go on. I'll be right behind you. I would go first but I doubt you would want a face full of -"

"Okay! Okay I'm going!" I sighed, hiding my smile at his words. Rung after rung, I climbed my way to the top, feeling his eyes on my ass and bare legs. I continued, coming up through a trap door and hauling myself up into the sturdy tree house. It was dark but the full moon over head allowed me to see that the tree house was a pretty decent size. I stood, noticing I had plenty of room.

Zaryn climbed into the treehouse, shutting the door behind him and grabbing a spray near by, spraying the treehouse floors.

"What's that?" I asked, noticing it didn't have a smell.

He looked up at me, blue eyes glowing beneath the moon beams. "It's a scent masker. So no one will smell us here. I use to use it when I wanted to be alone and hide from everyone."

I walked around the room, noticing a hammock at the far corner and a bookshelf with a lot of werewolf books next to it... A twin sized mattress in the other corner with a blanket and pillow. I wonder if he had slept here when he was young.

I whipped to face him with curiosity. "I know these woods. The clearing is my special spot. How come I've never seen this here?" I glanced out the window, seeing the exact spot we were at moments earlier in the distance. My special rock was visible.

He sighed, coming up behind me. "I built this when I was fourteen, you were about ten. You and Deacon would come up here all the time when you guys were around eleven.. That's when I would sit up here and I would just watch you as creepy as it sounds. I had a crush on you though I would have never admitted to it. I was fifteen then and you were just eleven. Sometimes when you were by yourself, I would just sit and watch you for hours. I'd mask my scent so you'd never smell me but this treehouse is camouflaged on the outside with limbs and ivy so its not noticeable with the naked eye. Especially not with the tree canopies hiding it." His breath was now on my ear, his body right behind mine. I could feel the heat from him flow into me from being so close.

He liked me even then?

"Nova. Look at me." He turned my body to face him. His blue eyes pled with me to understand.. To love him.

But I can't . not right now. If Ever.

I took a deep breath, "I would come up here by the stream sometimes to think about you Zaryn. You should have said something." I admitted. His eyes widened a fraction.

"You did? God Nova.. I wish I would have but I always believed it would ruin our families since we both had mates out there . if I had known it was you... I would have confessed my love for you." He admitted. My breath caught and he closed his eyes tight, head bowing down at realization of what he just said.

He loved me..

Its too late now..

"Dont let me down, Zaryn." I breathed.

A/n: this is the moment to finish reading this steamy part of the chapter in my private chater book for shatter, called Freak Nasty. Turn there now and locate this chapter.. Then come back to this chapter for the A/N at the bottom. Remember to vote and comment on this page! Those of you who have innocent eyes, keep reading :)

"Zaryn.." My hand reached up, cupping his cheek as his eyes found mine once more. We studied each other for a moment before his lips found mine in a passionate kiss. Hands on my hips pulled me into his hard body and I felt his excitement against my stomach as his tongue invaded my mouth. Breathing heavy, his hands pushed up into my shirt, finger tips running against the flesh at my waist, reaching higher over my ribs before lifting my shirt off and over my head. Breaking the kiss only slightly for him to remove my shirt, his lips were back on mine, hands running across the naked flesh of my back.

I gasped into his mouth and his hands were at my bra, unclasping it and pulling it off of me. Excitement swept through my body and I found myself quivering with need.. My breasts pressed up against his chest, my hard pebbles, brushing down his torso giving me pleasure.

Lips kissed mine one last time before trailing down my jaw lightly and down my neck. I wanted to stop but my wolf wouldn't let me. Neither would my body.

"Zaryn.." I panted, out of breath, into the night air. He replied with gentle kisses to my neck, licking and sucking the skin into his mouth before his large calloused hands cupped my flesh, making me gasp in surprise. He kissed down my collar bone before bending down to take me into his mouth, sucking and massaging with his tongue.

The lust in my body pulsated, throbbing my insides as liquid desire pooled in my lower belly, my panties ruined.

He took a deep breath, breathing in my scent as growls vibrated his chest. Nimble fingers unclasped my jean shorts before pulling them down to my ankles and before I knew it, he had me in his arms, carrying me to the mattress lying in the far corner of the treehouse, depositing me on top.

I lay there beneath him, His large hands pushed my thighs apart, resting his naked body between my legs. I moaned at the feeling of his hardness against the thin slick lace material covering my virtue. The feeling of having my mate naked on top of me was a feeling that my mind couldn't over power.

His eyes loomed down my body, seeing his marks from this morning while appreciative growls vibrated my chest from him. My own wolf began growling and purring inside me as he lay against me.

My hands found their way into his hair, pulling his mouth to mine as my legs wrapped around him, clutching him to me. He devoured my mouth as his hips rocked against mine, pressing into me, sending pleasure spiking through me. I wanted to feel the feeling I felt this morning..

He broke away from my lips, kissing down my body. Tongue licking as much skin as he could on his way down. He stopped above the lace band of my panty line, nibbling and sucking the flesh, teeth out, as I withered and moaned beneath him.

Thoughts in my mind that this wasn't a good idea went out the window when I felt him slide the black, soaked material from my body, pulling them down my legs and off me completely. He took them and inhaled deeply while I stared up at him with wide eyes. His pupils dilated with need before he threw my panties on the floor and pushed my legs wide apart, pleasuring me with his mouth as my muscles clenched.

My heart beat out of my chest with excitement at this male who has taken interest in my body. The wolf inside me watched as well, purring as she watched our male enjoy us.

His mouth returned to naked flesh, suckling at the skin before a digit found its way into the mix.

I moaned at the new feeling, throwing my head back as his mouth went lower, tongue flicking out to taste me... Sliding up and down.

A strangled moan made its way out of my throat which spurred him on to give me something I'd never experienced before.

His tongue was making love to my most sensitive area as i shuddered and bucked. His hands gripped my hips down to keep me from thrashing. The digit that played my body like a piano, suddenly found its way inside my body causing me to cry out at the unknown pleasurable feeling, his skilled maneuvers never breaking my virtue, while his mouth brought exquisite pleasure to a bundle of nerves.

I felt my body become more arroused, my wolf begging to be released.. But I had her blocked now. I was ready for her and blocked her before she could make an appearance.

With it being a full moon, she could easily make an escape and take over but I kept reminding her it would cause us turmoil. She didn't care.

It felt as if i was floating up in the air as he delivered sweet pleasure to my bud, tongue never leaving me while his finger massaged me from the inside.

My stomach tightened as he held my hip down from thrashing and with one final dance of his tongue, my insides clenched while my body broke free, flying up and crashing back down like a wave, breaking a new sense of pleasure I'd not felt. My muscles as I screamed out in ecstasy.

I panted, attempting to catch my breath while sweat dripped down my body, Zaryn removed himself as his mouth tasted my essence, I couldn't help but to wiggle around but his hand kept a firm grip on my waist, forcing me to take the pleasure he offered while he cleaned me..

. He eyes found mine with a satisfied look in them.

He crawled on top of me, settling himself between my legs as he loomed over me, resting. My chest heaved up and down as I attempted to catch my breath from the tantric position he had me in moments ago.

"Nova. You taste so sweet. I would do that to you every single day if you'd let me." His eyes penetrated my soul as his lips pressed a kiss to mine, tongue inviting itself in to give me a taste of my arousal. Moaning into the kiss, he rocked himself against me. It seems my body doesn't shut off when he's around.

He took one last taste of my lips before moving to lie next to my body on his side. He groaned once his hardness touched my skin. He had no release... He lay beside me,propped up on his elbow, his excitement resting against my hip as he watched my body heave trying to catch my breath. His other hand came to rest on my stomach, sliding up my chest.

"You're so beautiful Nova." He breathed, mesmerized.

Glancing at him, his eyes were on my face, lips swollen from our kiss. I felt guilty that he gave me pleasure and I haven't returned the favor but I never asked him to. He was going to hurt now.

The guilt started creeping in but I forced myself to take him in my hand, feeling his hardness felt like velvet encased steel between my hand.

He sucked in a breath through his teeth, hand taking mine away. "You don't have to do that. It was pleasurable for me to do that to you."

Finally I had caught my breath. "I'm surprised our wolves didn't break free" I breathed as his hand caressed my skin.

He leaned in, kissing my bare shoulder. "I might have had something to do with that."

A frown made its way to my forehead as I turned my head his way. "What? How?"

A low chuckle vibrated his chest, eyes twinkling with amusement. "That scent masking spray also keeps wolves from breaking through on their own will."

I gasped. "So you planned that!?"

Laughing he shook his head. "No Nova I didn't plan it, its just part of the masking liquid. Just an added plus for us to enjoy ourselves."

I hmmed. "Well don't think this is going to be a reoccurring thing. This needs to stop Zaryn. You have responsibilities that do no include me." I tried to get up from the bed but his arm around my waist would not allow me.

"Zaryn let go." I was beginning to feel perturbed at myself for allowing this to happen again.. For the second time today.

"Nova please just stay. Lay here with me. Let's just pretend there's nothing but you and I ." he pleaded with those big blue eyes. His desire had finally vanished and he was hanging limp against my thigh.

I closed my eyes, breathing in to try to control myself. "Zaryn I need to go. I need to wash your scent off of me and go have dinner."

With those words, he let go of my body. "Have you eaten today? At all?"

I nodded as I slipped my panties and bra on, his eyes watching me the whole time. "I did. But I'm hungry."

Sighing, he got up from the bed and handed me my top once I had my shorts on and buttoned. "Thanks."

I left Zaryn there in the tree house and made my way down the tree, my stomach rumbling in hunger. I walked down the path through the woods, my arms wrapped around myself, keeping my nose on alert for any other wolves that might be around to smell his scent on me. The cool breeze whipped past my heated skin, caressing my flesh allowing goosebumps to find their way to the surface. His scent lingered on me like moss on a tree.. Sticking to every crack and crevice like it belongs there. His scent was everywhere.. On my skin, between my legs..

I'll have to sneak to take a shower.

I felt like an idiot. I keep giving in when I know I shouldn't.. When I know I can't. But every time he shows his face it breaks me down.

I'm going to have to do something about this. This can't happen again. It will only hurt worse.

A/n: some of you notice the steamy words and most of the steamy actions are edited out but you will find all freakiness in private chapters in my other book Freak Nasty.. its a book dedicated JUST for private chapters of shatter. :) i had to do this for rating purposes!