-2- Todoroki's hidden past

Midoriya's shoulders slumps as he missed his bus by a whisker after the afternoon classes.

He hobbled frantically on his spastic legs and near fell trying to catch up, only to see the roaring vehicle disappear around the corner.

With a sigh, he reluctantly accepts his fate and resignes himself to walking home and chooses the shorter route, through the park.

But now, as he struggles to keep his balance, stumbling and tripping over every uneven spot on the path, he deeply regrets that decision.

His legs are starting to ache, and all he wants now is to make it home and fall onto his bed.

He notices the absence of other people around. No children, no joggers panting past, not even a bird chirping on the trees.

The silence is just broken by the scraping sound of his feet being dragged heavily on the gritty gravel of the path.

He'd chosen that route also for that, after all. He'd rather struggle alone rather than face the pitying stares of strangers on the busy streets.

As he trudges along the winding trail, a figure catches his eye in the distance. A boy, leaning with his back against a tree. Midoriya immediatly recognizes him. Shouto-kun.

Something is wrong, the boy is clutching his chest with his arms and, in the eerie silence of the park, Midoriya can hear faint whimperings coming from there.

He immediatly leaves the trail, fighting against his uncooperative legs to get to him as fast a he can.

"Shouto-kun! What happens?! Are you ok?" Asks Midoriya anxiously, awkwardly standing in front of his friend.

The boy doesn't answer,  his eyes wide open. He is breathing fast, with irregular shallow gulps.

"Shouto-kun! Shouto-kun!" Calls Midoriya tensely. " What's up?!"

Todoroki keeps whimpering, staring into the void with terrorized eyes.

"Shouto-kun! It's me, Izuku! Speak to me!" Something changes in Todoroki's terrified face.

"...Izuku?"

"Yes... Yes, it's me! What's happening?!"

"Izuku... " Todoroki shakingly reaches his arms toward Midoriya.

"...Izuku..." He gasps grabbing Midoriya's shoulders, leaning forward on him.

"Shouto-kun!" Yelps Midoriya, startled. "Don't push me! You'll make me fall!"

Too late, Midoriya's legs can't hold the weight, he wobbles back a few steps and both boys stumble on the grass.

Midoriya manages to get up four legged and reach Todoroki that was laying on his back on the thick grass.

His eyes are closed now and his breath is more deep and regular. Midoriya lays a hand on Todoroki shoulder, gently shaking it. "Shouto-kun?..." He asks tentatively.

"I'm sorry Izuku..." Says Todoroki weakly, opening his mismatched eyes, looking at his friend. "Did I hurt you?" He asks.

"No, no. You just leant on me and I fell."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"Shouto-kun, what happened to you?!" Midoriya's voice sounds scared.

"It's nothing. Don't worry." Says Todoroki elusively.

"What?! No way, tell me the truth! What's happening to you?!" Insisted Midoriya.

"I told you! it's nothing to be concerned of!"

Todoroki's voice sounded louder and harsher than he intended and Midoriya jolted back.

"Sorry Izuku... I didn't want to yell at you..." Sighs Todoroki, clearly exausted.

After a while, Todoroki stands up and reaches a hand to help Midoriya doing the same.

Shocked by the harsh reaction of his friend, Midoriya hesitates a little before grabbing Todoroki's hand.

"I didn't expect to meet you here, Izuku." Says Todoroki once Midoriya stood up.

"Oh, well... I missed my bus so I decided to walk... This is the shorter route to my home..." Midoriya feels hurt. He really didn't expect Shouto-kun would yell at him.

"May I come along with you for a while?" Asks Todoroki quietely.

Midoriya hesitates a little before responding. "Uh, sure..."

The two boys are walking slowly along the path, without talking.

"Izuku..." Says Todoroki, breaking the silence.

"Yes, Shouto-kun, what is it?"

"Are you tired? We can stop and take a rest." Asks Todoroki in his usual neutral tone.

"No, I'm not. Let's keep going." Midoriya replies, still feeling unsettled by his friend's unexpected outburst.

"Liar..." Todoroki stated bluntly. "You are panting and dragging your feet a lot more than usual. Why are you lying to me?"

"And why are you lying to me?!" Shots back Midoriya, in a loud angry tone.

"What happens to you? We are friends! Remember?!"

"Oh... I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I- I didn't mean..." then he stammers covering his mouth with his hands, astonished by the harshness of his own words.

Todoroki smiles sadly. "No, you're right...It's me the one who should apologize..."

"I've been rude... Please, forgive me... Let's sit down," Todoroki says, gesturing to a nearby bench. "While you rest, I'll tell you everything."

"First of all, " Says Todoroki as they settled onto the wooden bench. "what you saw before was a panic attack. Do you know what is it?"

"Mmm... Yes I do but I didn't think it would be so... Um..."

"Bad?" Finishes Todoroki with a half smile.

"Well... Yes. You scared me!"

"I know, sorry. I can usually sense when an attack is coming and can find a place to hide. I don't want anyone to see me in that state. But this time, there was nowhere to go."

"You seemed terrorized..."

"I was... In those moments, I feel like I'm going to die... Like the entire universe is collapsing on me..."

"But... there should be... a treatment..." Mutters Midoriya.

Todoroki gently smiles seeing the concern of his friend. "Well, yes and no... Sure you wanna hear the story behind that?"

"If that doesn't hurt you, yes, I would."

"Well then, I'm going to tell it from the beginning."

"I was born into a wealthy family. My father is a rich businessman, with numerous influential connections. However, he is also a horrible person who only cares about himself and his businnes. He married my mom solely for her family's company, which he eventually merged with his own. He never loved her."

Todoroki is staring at some distant point while talking. His voice neutral, as usual. "My mom is a sweet and caring person but also very fragile and sensitive. My father, on the other hand, was always harsh with her, almost violent. Things only got worse after I was born; my father was furious. How could I possibly be his son, with these eyes and these hairs? "

"You may think that having mismatched eyes and hairs is not that terrible but my father thought differently. His son had to be perfect. He let my hair be bleached and forced me to wear a contact on my left eye to match the other one."

"He became even more rude with my mom, accusing her to have betrayed him as he couldn't possibly be the father of such a freak like me... I could hear my mom crying every night in her room. I felt so helpless. How could my father be so mean with her..."

"One evening, when I was five, I heard her sobbing in the kitchen where she was making some tea. I got close and called her. She didn't hear me coming and my voice startled her. She startled and poured the jug of boiling water he was holding on me..."

Todoroki raises his left hand to his face and sweeps his fingers on the wrinkled skin of his scar.

Midoriya was listening, speechless. The emotion makes his legs randomly jerk so he needs to grab the bench to keep him sitting steadily.

"She had a mental breakdown." Continued Todoroki. "She hugged me in panic asking loudly for help, crying and apologizing to me."

"I didn't understand... What did I do?... Why my mom did that to me?..." Todoroki's voice is still neutral and quiet.

Midoriya, instead, is horrified. He couldn't believe that such an horrible thing could have happened.

"The wound healed in several months." Continues Todoroki. "In the meantime, my father took advantage from what happened to get rid of both my mom and me, managing to lock up her  in a psychiatric hospital and me in a institute where I will stay until I turn eighteen."

Midoriya feels terrible, he forced Shouto-kun to recall those horrible memories... How could he'd been so insensitive...

"That institute is not that bad actually. It's a sort of an hotel where I have to get back every night..." Todoroki adds looking at Midoriya, attempting a smile.

"So, now you know pretty much everything about me and why I sometimes have to hide myself for a while. These scars shall never heal. They gonna hurt forever..."

Midoriya startles. "Shouto-kun, you told me your scar didn't hurt anymore! If I'd known, I'd never asked to touch it that day!"

Todoroki smiles at the worried face of his friend. "Don't worry Izuku, my face doesn't hurt anymore" He says rubbing his scar. "It's the scar inside me that won't heal..."Says Todoroki, staring once more at something far away.

"I never met my mom again since then. I was forbidden to see her, to talk or write to her. I just want to see my mom one more time, talk to her, to tell her that it wasn't her fault...To tell her... I love her..."

Todoroki voice is quiet and emotionless but Midoriya can see streams of tears running down his cheeks. The boy stops talking. He sits motionless, tears running down his face, flooding the wrinkled skin of his scar.

Midoriya is petrified, he'd never imagined such a terrible story. He doesn't know what to do... Instinctively he gently puts a hand on his friend's back.

Todoroki shivers at the contact and after a moment he was sobbing uncontrollably on Midoriya's shoulder.

Still speechless, Midoriya wraps his arms around Todoroki gently rubbing his back. The time stops.

He doesn't know how much time passed before Todoroki calmed down and left his hug. He is now sitting straight again beside Midoriya, wiping his eyes.

"Shouto-kun..." Says Midoriya hesitantly. "Are you ok?"

Todoroki turns to him, weakly smiling. "Yes. I'm ok Izuku."

He clears his throat. "I'm sorry. I made you worry..." He says.

"What?! No! It's my fault!" Apologizes Midoriya on the verge of tears. "I forced you to recall those terrible moments... Forgive me Shouto-kun... I- I'm really, really sorry..."

"You shouldn't." Says Todoroki, quietly. "I never told my story to anyone until now. Thanks for  having listened to it. I feel relieved now." He says taking a deep breath. "You are always able to make me feel better. What's your secret, disabled kid?" He adds, gently smiling.

"But, but I... you... I- I don't... " Anxiously stutters Midoriya, staring at Todoroki.

Todoroki smiles, lightly leaning a hand on Midoriya's shoulder. "Izuku, I'm ok, really... Stop looking at me with that worried face! And stop shaking..." He adds, moving his hand on one of Midoriya's twitching legs.

"Well.." says Midoriya shyly smiling, a little relieved by Todoroki's words. "For the worried face I may be able to do something, but for the shaking... I'm afraid you'll be disappointed..."

Todoroki chuckles and gently squeezes Midoriya's thin leg. "We really should go." He says. "Where I live, the gate closes at seven P.M. If I'd be late I'll have to sleep in the park... Let's go."

Todoroki stands up waiting for Midoriya to do the same but his friend is struggling to get up.

"What happens? Need a hand?" Asks Todoroki, reaching a hand to Midoriya.

"Yes thanks, sorry..." Midoriya grabs Todoroki's hand and eventually manages to stand up.

"Are you ok, Izuku?"

"Yes. Let's go."

Midoriya attempts a few steps forward but his feet got tangled making him trip and fall heavily onto Todoroki who manages to catch him just before he crashes on the ground.

"Ok. Let's make a deal." Says Todoroki helping his friend to sit again on the bench. "We both should stop acting heroes. What's up with you legs?"

"Oh, um... You know... When I'm tired or anxious my legs are harder to control..." Says Midoriya fidgeting. "Unfortunately now I'm both... I don't think I can walk until I rest for a while and calm down..." He adds, uneasily.

"Ok, I am carrying you. Piggyback." Says Todoroki in his usual blank tone.

Midoriya startles. "What?! No way!" He says loudly.

"Well. I'll carry you bridal style then. The choice is yours." Todoroki replies.

"Wh- what?!" Midoriya's face turns red like a tomato.

"listen Izuku, I dont wanna sleep in the park tonight, also I am not leaving you alone here. Choose."

"But- but, I... I..." Stutters Midoriya. Todoroki's weird eyes were staring at him, cold as usual, but Midoriya could see a spark of amusement in them. He knows he is going to do what he said...

"Ok." He sighs. "Piggyback... But... I am not sure I can keep my feet away from your legs... My shoes are dusty, I'm going to smudge your pants..."

"Oh... That's terrible indeed, but I think I can cope with that." Teases Todoroki.

Midoriya sighs again, resigned. "Let me take off my shoes..." He finally said, reaching down to grab his right knee and pulling it up to raise his foot from the ground. He pats away some dust from his pants before pulling off his shoe without unlacing it. The white socked foot flops off limply and drops on the thick grass as Midoriya releases his knee. After he did the same with his other foot, he slaps together his warped shoes to get rid of some of the dust before stuffing them into his backpack.

Todoroki watches with interest at the process, then his gaze shifts to Midoriya's white socked feet clumsily laying on the grass. A small smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. "Did I ever tell you that you have really cute flat feet?" He teases.

"Oh... Um... Y-yes... You... I guess you did..." Stutters Midoriya blushing even more. "Um... Shall... Shall we go now?" He adds shyly, trying to change matter

"Yes, Sure. Jump on!" Says Todoroki turning his back and squatting so Midoriya could easily hang on him while seating on the bench.

"... Jump is not exactly the word I'd use..." Mumbles Midoriya wrapping his arms around Todoroki's shoulders.

"Are you ok, back there?" Asks Todoroki, after he stood up, gently grabbing Midoriya's thin legs.

"Y-yes..." Shyly answers Midoriya.

"Ok, where should we go?" Asks Todoroki, starting to walk.

"Um... Straight ahead..." Says Midoriya, pointing to the gate leading out of the park.

Todoroki can feel Midoriya's legs twitching beneath his hands. As predicted, he can't keep his spastic legs still and his socked feet are constantly rubbing and bumping on Todoroki's thighs, sending a tingling sensation through him that he can't help to feel oddly endearing.

"Izuku..."

"Mmm?"

"...Thanks..."

"For what? It's you the one who is carrying me home on your back..."

Asks Midoriya, ducking his head over Todoroki's shoulder.

Then Todoroki twists his head and Midoriya can see a sweet smile lightening his friend's face.

Todoroki gently squeezes his friend's legs and lightly bumps his head against Midoriya's poking one.

"Thanks for standing by me. Thanks for being you, Izuku..." His voice, usually cold and distant, sounds now warm and caring.

Finally Midoriya's bright smile burst onto his face as his whole body relaxes, resting on his friend's shoulders.