five

"Ow! You bitch, what was that for?" I ask Tristan while putting a hand on my throbbing nose, giving him a dirty glare.

"You're not concentrated. Focus."

I give him a look, one he completely ignores.

"Okay, start again," he gets into a fight stance and I mirror him, not without keeping my big mouth shut tho.

"You try living with your mates who clearly don't want you there and overall don't want you because they despise you."

Instead of responding he throws the first punch, one I'm able to block but he doesn't hesitate to take advantage of my weak form and the next second I lay on the ground on my back and a wince leaves my mouth.

"Fuck you."

He just shakes his head at me and stretches out his hand, helping me up.

"You don't really believe that they despise you, do you?"

"I mean... isn't it obvious? And also totally understandable?"

Tristan gives me a disproving look, one that I already know too well. He thinks I talk down on myself too much, I think I just have a pretty realistic way of how people perceive me.

"They don't hate you. They can't take their eyes off of you, everytime you're in the same room as them and-"

"-and that's all because of the mate bond. It doesn't have anything to do with how they actually feel about me," I finish for him, not wanting to hear those words that would bring my hopes up, just for them to be crushed again.

Just as he wants to reply you can hear people talking in the distance and me and Tristan both tense up at the same time.

It's the warrior wolves, coming to train. Tristan and I share a quick look and start to pick up our things to leave but a voice stops us.

"Don't let us disrupt you."

Adrian. Suddenly, my wolf is no longer as quiet as he was the while time today.

"No, it's fine. We've trained enough for today," Tristan replies in a gruff voice and some of the people behind Adrian start whispering, making me narrow my eyes.

"I'm sure you did," a boy my age taunts, making my wolf growl lowly in my head.

Adrian gives him a disapproving look and looks back at us, at me and I avert my gaze when I feel like I can no longer hold it.

"Why don't you train with us?" he suggests and I look at him again, surprised that he would suggest something like that.

My impression the last few days was, that he wanted to get away from me as far as possible. Before anyone can reply, the boy speaks up again.

"So he can paralyze us as well?"

I freeze on the spot, instinctively taking a step closer to Tristan, not really even sure why.

My mouth suddenly feels dry and I don't dare to look anywhere but on the ground, suddenly feeling like I might throw up any second.

My wolf is suddenly still again and I can feel the guilt he's feeling right now, thinking that all of this is his fault.

I'm glad that we made such progress that he actually could show me how he feels, anything else than anger that is, but at the same time, I don't want him to feel guilty. Not for something that was bound to happen at some point.

A growl is heard and before you know it, Adrian is standing in front of him with a deadly look on his face.

"Do you really think I would put my own pack members in that kind of danger? Are you questioning my authority?"

A small part of me hoped he was getting that worked up because the boy made a fool of me, but by now I know, that that wouldn't be the case.

But at least he doesn't think I'm a danger to this pack? Not sure if that's a good thing or he's calling me weak now.

"Let's go. We don't have to listen to this," Tristan whispers and puts a hand on my back to push me forward as to make sure that I'll follow him.

"Thank you for your offer, Alpha Adrian. But we would rather leave."

Adrian stares the boy down for a another second before bringing his gaze to us and nodding.

Our eyes meet for a second and briefly I think I see a spark of agony, but he quickly gets a grip and turns back to the boy.

"Don't think you'll get away with this that easy."

I'm already further away from them but the voice he uses sends a shiver down my spine.

Fuck the mate-bond.

*

There's a knock ok the door.

"Come in," I mumble, turning the page of the book around, not really looking up at the person walking in.

"Rafael?" Levi asks after a moment and I sigh, looking up at him and Adrian.

My wolf knew they were coming before they probably knew it themselves, that's how... obsessed he is with them.

He growls playfully in my head.

"What is it?" I ask.

Suddenly I'm nervous again. Why do they have to be so intimidating together?

I subconsciously bring the bedsheets closer to me.

Adrians dark gaze lingers on me for a few seconds and then turns his attention to Levi who gives him a stern look.

Huh.

Can they just spill already? And what are they even doing here?

They're probably gonna kick me out already. Oh I fucking knew it-

"I wanted to apologize."

My eyes widen at Adrians words and I gape at him, not really believing what I just heard.

"Apologize?" I ask, after a minute or so and look right back at Adrian, not backing down this time.

Alright, that was a lie. After locking eyes with him fir barely three seconds I have to avert my gaze. I hate eye-contact.

And I really don't want sound like some lovesick puppy but his eyes always got this stupid reaction out of me when he watched me for longer and I became a nervous wreck because his eyes are so pretty and-

"Rafael? Rafael!"

"Huh?" I look up at Levi, who's suddenly really close to me and has a concerned look on his face and Adrian's also in the room, the door closed behind them.

I spaced out again.

"Shit," I curse and shake myself my head a little to clear it from its thoughts. Or memories.

God, this is so embarrassing. I hate myself.

"Are you okay?"

"Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine."

Why does he ask when he doesn't care?

But I should know better than that, because that's Levi, he does care, he cares about everyone too much.

"Rafael."

I look up at Adrian, a serious look covers his features.

"What?" I'm obviously playing dumb, "what did you want to apologize for?"

For a moment the two of them just look at each other, probably communicating through the mind-link and I grow impatient.

Adrain finally sighs and starts talking.

"I wanted to apologize for today. Something like that shouldn't have happened. We don't accept bullying, not even-"

Adrian stops himself before he finishes and I almost scoff, but stop myself.

But they accept abusing?

"Not even what?" my voice is bitter and he tries to say something but I just shake my head. He doesn't have to explain himself, I know what he means.

"It's fine. I should probably get used to it anyway," I mumble and give them an indifferent look.

None of them know what to say.

"Can you leave now?"

I may be a bit rude and by the way Adrians gaze darkens I know he's not happy but I don't care.

I'm tired. I want to continue reading.

Sometimes that's the only way to escape this stupid reality. It shuts my thoughts up.

"Of course," Levi whispers and drags Adrian with him.

He stops at the door.

"I'm sorry."

Yeah, me too.

Except he doesn't have something to be sorry for and I do.