Chapter 16: Decisions

Sirius' POV

Yes, I wasn't as good as Marien thought. I couldn't even keep looking at her. This had been my mission from the beginning since the humans had threatened us. I was a warrior, trained since childhood to be tough and fierce. Taking advantage of my transition stage, they made me sneak among the humans and find her to bring her.

Of course, at first, I didn't know my mission was a girl. It was against my principles to hurt a lady, no matter what. Dad had instilled in me respect for women. For Orion, humans were of no value; I saw it differently.

Now, I felt that I had committed dishonor. It didn't matter if she was human; I had betrayed her. I betrayed someone who trusted me.

But what other choice did I have?

I asked Altair not to mistreat or hurt her so we could talk and reason. However, he did not answer me. He just looked at me sideways while Orion spoke to Marien.

We left the small building, where I spent much time training when I was younger, and I hurried to talk to Orion.

"I already accomplished my mission," I spoke coldly and decisively. "You should do your part, tell the leaders, and stop watching upon my mother."

Orion, approaching a bonfire that the brothers Apus and Antares had built, turned to look at me with annoyance.

"You took too long. You go and fix your stuff."

"W-what?"

"I agreed with the elder leaders that you would go. You are already a man. Say hello to your mother for me, and join a partner. I can take care of this from now on. It's no longer your mission. You're done." He turned and continued with his thing. I clenched my fists. This wasn't in the plan, but... "Go. My men will believe you won't show up today either, and they'll get impatient. You don't want them to harass your mother, do you?"

I looked back at the fort where Marien was but thought of my mother. All my life, I heard that she had committed dishonor, that I was a mistake, that I should not have been 'born.' I didn't understand what they meant, but that was why they punished me, telling me from a young age to be a warrior when I should have been a builder, like my father, or a hunter, like my mother.

This mission would clear my mother's name. Her honor was to be restored. I hadn't had a choice.

I was cornered, but I trusted that Altair would explain to Orion, and they would talk to Marien to make some deal. At least, that was what Orion had told her. He wanted her to collaborate so that she would get out of there. In any case, I wouldn't take long or continue with my life as if nothing had happened.

I ran towards the town.

***

The town was a little far away, so I didn't stop until I got there, overwhelmed with worry. I was already breathing hard. It was almost five in the morning, and I was soon greeted by the ups and downs of the dirt streets since we were among the mountains. Our homes were camouflaged under huge trees.

Some chickens ran scared to get out of my way. Several people recognized me, and I heard them mention me with some surprise.

As the day began for many, I could smell the charcoal stoves and hear the movement. Dew was in the air, and the wet earth had a characteristic smell. However, this time, I wasn't so happy to return after so long; I just wanted to clear things up and return as soon as possible to ensure Orion let Marien go.

I saw the two Orion men sitting near the entrance to my house and stopped, growling like a mad dog and becoming as threatening as I could.

"Ah. Sirius. It's about time," one sneered.

They both stood up. One looked at me suspiciously and growled lowly, but the other put his arm in front of him.

"Your mother is fine. We have taken care of her."

"Don't think I don't know you've been bothering her," I spoke sternly and coldly. "How dare you mess with a lady?!"

"Hey," he raised his hands briefly. "Your mother doesn't have the best honor."

And I went on the attack.

We rolled around, growling like savages. I bit and pulled flesh and was hit roughly, but that didn't stop me. I was blinded by fury. I always defended my mother. I had protected Marien like that, which made me notice that she had become as important as my mother, even though I felt something very different and strange about her.

Because of the helplessness of coming to kick out these men and being away from Marien, I became extra aggressive.

With one blow, I pushed him off and jumped. I stayed between the entrance of the house and them without stopping growling. According to the rules, when warriors kept watch over someone, they could only be relieved by the boss, in this case, Orion, or with a fight with the culprit of the watch, that was me.

Already moderately wounded and beaten, both stepped back and nodded, although with annoyance and pride on the floor. Some villagers, who had stopped to look just out of curiosity, walked away.

"We're leaving," said one. "You were late, by the way, so it's your fault."

They finally left. I let out a sigh and went home. The wounds started to hurt, but it didn't matter.

"Mother," I murmured as soon as I entered.

She came from her room with Dad, and I looked down in embarrassment.

"Sirius," he said.

"I came to apologize and let you know Mom is no longer under surveillance. Sorry for being late. Sorry, mother, for putting you in a discomfort and stress situation."

"Don't worry. The important thing is that you have finished the mission."

"Uh. Yes..." I looked up. "As for that... I must go back."

"Haven't you finished?"

"Y-yes, but... I must come back. Don't worry. First, I must go talk to Ganymede."

"Well, rest a little. It seems like you've been running for hours." He turned around. "Come, your room is ready, and there is something to eat in the kitchen."

I sighed and nodded.

Although I tried not to take long, I fell asleep instantly after eating and taking a quick bath.

By afternoon, angry with myself for falling asleep, I ran to find Ganymede, my advisor and one of the leading elders. I hoped he'd do me a favor, even though he'd been a victim of my pranks when I was younger and even though I'd tripped him that time while springing a deer trap. Oh, geez, I wish they had punished me harder to make me behave.

I arrived at the place where the elders used to be. It was a building whose walls were covered with Sillar stone, which gave it a white and pure appearance, with plants in its many extensive gardens. Birds flew between the open rooms with large openings and out into the trees.

I soon ran into him, who was wearing one of the characteristic white robes.

"Ah, Sirius," he greeted.

I bowed my head briefly as a sign of respect and greeting.

"I have come to clear my name. I know that Orion gave notice of my mission and that my mother would be under surveillance. Now I have returned. I have fulfilled, and I want you to write that now Mom has her honor intact."

He smiled for just a moment and nodded.

"It's okay. You don't have to worry anymore. I'm going to write it myself now."

"Thank you. So what I do won't affect Mom from now on, right? Because I'm already twenty."

"Yes, kid, don't worry. That doesn't mean you'll do something to tarnish your honor, do you?" He asked, suspicious.

I immediately denied it, trying not to let him notice I was lying.

"No. I want to make sure my parents are okay. Now I can make decisions and take charge of my life without any of my decisions affecting them."

"Indeed."

I nodded in farewell and left.

After telling my parents I had to take care of something, I set off again towards Orion's fort, praying everything would be okay there.

***

The cool weather helped me not get too exhausted, and by after dawn, I had arrived. Only Apus and Antares were outside, which worried me.

"Hey," one stood up and handed me a bottle. "Altair forgot this."

I grabbed it but didn't stop to ask. I entered the building when I heard some screams. My heart couldn't beat any faster, but my worry seemed stronger.

I was horrified as I stood in the doorway of Marien's cell.

Altair had her against the wall, suffocating her with his hands on her neck. My blood boiled, and once again, the beast within awakened. The one that was unleashed every time Marien was in danger. It was something I never thought would happen with a human.

Before I stopped to think, I had run and pushed Altair so roughly that he fell. He looked at me with surprise and fury. We trained together, and I knew how much he hated humans, but he could have been kind; she hadn't done anything to him.

She wasn't evil. She didn't deserve any of this. I clenched my fists to contain myself.

"So you came back," Altair murmured, standing up.

I tried to control my strong heartbeat.

"Move," Orion growled.

"I thought I asked you not to hurt her," I challenged sternly.

"Sirius, move," Orion scolded through his teeth, taking several steps forward. I could smell his fury.

I knew how aggressive he was, and his strength was more significant than mine, but he wouldn't jump into a fight here. He would look bad before a human, and his pride was stronger. I had to think quickly of something that would make them stop hurting her. I couldn't stand it. He could attack, which was dangerous for me but, above all, for her.

"I did the job; now listen. If it hadn't been for her, I wouldn't have been able to return. The least I can do is to ask that she don't suffer."

"Do you want to put your little honor at risk?"

"I only do what I think is fair. I owe her this. And I hate owing things, even worse if it's to a human."

He finally seemed to fall for what I said. It was true that the old me would have resented owing something to humans.

"In that case, you will kill her since you are better than us at not causing pain."

Somehow, I knew he wouldn't let her go, so I had planned to ask him to let me do that in case it happened. It relieved me that at least one thing was already working according to my original plan. I had a better chance of getting her out since I was in charge of her.

"I have no problem with that."

He smirked.

"Now make her sleep. We need to continue."

I turned slowly to face her for the second time after betraying her, and she had tears in her eyes. It disarmed me, but I had to keep up appearances.

I grabbed her by the arms and made her lay on her thin mattress. I stayed over her and covered her mouth while she shook. I swallowed hard as I felt her so fragile and helpless. This wasn't fair.

I had been a fool to think that I would have everything under control, that she wouldn't have it as bad as she did now.

I wanted to caress her skin, but she was terrified, and I had to control myself so the others wouldn't get suspicious.

I took the bottle they had given me.

"Anthony..." Her broken voice broke me.

Why? Why did she call me?

I looked at her, and although I was neutral on the outside, inside, I had torn me apart with guilt.

'Just wait, my beautiful, please.' I wanted to make her understand, even with my sight, but everyone was watching me.

"Not anymore," I replied. "Forget he existed."

Tears ran down her cheeks, and I wanted to screw everything and hug her tight.

"Sirius," they urged me.

I grunted impatiently and put her to sleep using the liquid from the bottle.

When we left, I sprinted to the warehouse and straight to the old sandbag hanging from a metal chain. I punched it furiously and released the rage I had been holding back. I hit it again and didn't stop. I grunted with every blow.

I should never have brought her. I should have come to be killed for treason. I was a damn coward!

I dug my claws into the fabric and pulled down, tearing it apart as a savage growl came out between my clenched teeth.

I remained on my knees while the sand finished falling.

My sweet Marien. She hated me.

"Was that contained fury?" Orion asked.

Oh, no.

"It's..." I cleared my throat and stood up, regaining my cool. "Precisely what I had been putting up with since I met her. She seriously overwhelmed my patience and complicated the trip. Thanks for letting me kill her."

He smiled sinisterly.

"Of course. You surprise me more and more." He retired pleased.

I breathed deeply. I didn't know how well I was fooling him; after all, he had known me since I was a child. I just hoped it was working...

I saw him go with Apus and Antares to another place, supposedly to look for something or see someone. Indeed, to speak to some other warriors from the other town.

When I stopped seeing them, I turned around, growling lowly, and addressed who was left. Altair.

"What's wrong with you?!" I exclaimed, giving him a push.

He reacted and hit me back.

"And what about you?!"

"Why have you mistreated her?! Where is your honor?!"

"She's just a human!"

"She is a lady! Don't you remember what Ganymede always told us?!"

He growled, and so did I. Then he was silent, still staring with annoyance.

"You. Where is your honor? Are you defending a human?"

"I told you she's not evil and asked you to tell Orion we can reason with her!"

"No," he accused me with his finger. "No. Humans are evil, and you know it!" He grabbed me roughly by the arms, and I growled again. "If Orion sees that you hesitate, he will kill you! Do you really doubt everything he has taught us?!"

I realized, with great disappointment, that he would not understand. I couldn't count on him. I would have to work on this alone. It was going to make everything more difficult, but it was better. Altair was never going to doubt Orion's word.

I took a deep breath and calmed down, or at least I faked it well.

"No. It's just that... My mother's thing had me very worried."

His grip loosened, and he breathed after considering my response. He walked away.

"Yes. I understand that." He kicked a rock. "I thought that human had already brainwashed you or something with some toxic stuff."

"No. What are you saying?"

My fake smile faded when he was no longer looking at me. I looked back at the fort and clenched my fists. I had to get out, leave her safe, and turn myself in for treason. I had to do it, or I would die trying.

**********

A/N: There will be more Sirius' point of view chapters from now on ;) Thank you!