Not a Better Man

MAX

Ever since our little spat in her room and the realization of my shifting feelings, I’d been avoiding Estella, pretending to be busier than I actually was.

I still drove her to school, though. She didn’t openly complain about the small distance I put between us, but I knew she was bothered by it. I could feel it.

On her sixteenth birthday, we gathered at her home as usual. It was a bit odd that there were more wolves than humans present, but none of us seemed to mind, and anyway, it made my girl happy.

I thought it was a good thing that she had managed to make friends on both sides. However, it was not really surprising, given her character.

No, I’m not delusional; Estella is not an angel. No person is. Yet, she possesses so many great qualities that overshadow any possible flaw in her character.

We had a great time. It was noisier than I usually prefer, but in a good way, and it ended quite early because Estella, Sarah, and Cal had plans for the rest of the night.

Like every year on that day, they had planned to go to the movies. They would usually see two or three films in a row, catching the last show.

They didn’t really care about the genre, but their arrangement was that each would choose one to keep it all fair.

Every other year I would be their driver, yet now that Cal had his license, there was no need for me to do so.

I didn’t mind, for I had to be up early to go to the human hospital, and more hours of sleep would surely benefit me.

Only, this plan did not exactly work out.

It was well into the night, and I was blissfully asleep when my phone started ringing.

I badly wanted to ignore it, but thinking it might be an urgent call from the human hospital, I picked it up, still too sleepy to check the caller’s ID.

But then again, it didn’t really matter. Whoever calls that time of night is surely a person in need.

“Yes,” I said, my voice groggy.

“Max?” a male voice replied, but with all the loud music from the background and my drowsiness, I didn’t immediately recognize it.

I removed the phone from my ear and looked at the screen, frowning when I saw the name.

“Caleb?” I asked, now completely awake and alert.

“Thank Goddess you are not sleeping!”

“I was. You woke me up. What’s wrong?”

“Well…” He paused, gulped, and then spoke again. “We need you to come and pick us up.”

“By you, you mean…?”

“Me, Sarah, and Estella, yes. Like now. Please.”

“At four in the morning?”

“Yup.”

There was a sense of urgency in his voice, and it was making me fear the worst. But if the worst had happened, the bond would alarm me about it. Right?

“From the movies?” I questioned.

Of course, I wasn’t naive enough to believe they were still at the movies and with all the commotion still audible from the other side of the line, but I played dumb all the same.

“No,” he said and sighed. “We are not at the movies.”

“Then where the hell are you at this hour?” I growled.

He gave me the address of a club.

A club.

I cut the call, got dressed, grabbed my keys, and left, driving well above the speed limit.

All the way there I was thinking of ways to kill the next alpha of Solomon’s Pack. I was sure it was all his doing.

He is two years older than the girls. He was supposed to be more responsible since he was the one driving them home tonight.

Obviously, having to call me in the middle of the night meant he could not drive the expensive car his daddy gave him when he got his driver’s license.

I reached the place in less than twenty minutes and found all three of them waiting outside for me. Caleb was leaning back on the club’s wall with his head in his palms.

Sarah was sitting on the pavement with Caleb’s jacket over her shoulders, and she looked pale and disheveled, while my Estella was lying barely conscious on her lap on the fucking pavement.

That was enough to make me furious. I got out of the car, slamming the door closed, and all but Estella jumped at the alarming sound.

Yet I fixed my attention on the irresponsible brat looking at me, scared.

I lunged for him, grabbed him by the neck, and lifted him up, banging his back on the wall. He winced but did not try to fight me. At least he knew he had fucked up, but that was not enough for me.

I heard Sarah yelling for me to let him go, but I didn’t bother with her. She was no smarter than he was or less to blame.

“What the fuck did you do?” I snarled.

“I am sorry, Max,” he sputtered, barely getting the words out as I choked him.

“I asked what did you do?” I repeated, accompanying each word with a bang of his back on the wall.

He was of my kind. He could definitely take it. The only favor I did him was loosening up my grip a little, so he could get the words out.

“We wanted to have fun. So we came here and drank.”

“Drank?”

“Yes,” he stuttered.

“You brought two underage girls, one of them a human, to a club to get drunk?” I roared, removing my hand from his neck and letting him fall on the ground with a loud thud.

“Are you a complete idiot, you fucking brat?”

“It’s not his fault!” Sarah shouted from behind me.

I turned to face her. Estella was still on her lap, as unconscious as before, and that was enough to keep my anger intact.

“Then whose fault is it?”

“Ours,” she murmured, lowering her head. “We wanted something different for Estella’s birthday, and a kid from school has a cousin who works here, so he arranged to get us in without ID.

“Estella said we could do it easily now that Cal has his license and could be our driver. We would just pretend to go to the movies like every other year.”

Did I think this was Estella’s doing? Absolutely. Even though she was usually sensible for her age, she had a wild streak. And I was certain Julian would never have allowed her to go to a club without supervision.

No responsible guardian would.

I shot Sarah a stern look, then moved to check on Estella.

That should have been my first move when I arrived, but my anger at Caleb had clouded my judgment.

Under the streetlight, Estella looked ghostly pale. I gently touched her cheek as I checked her pulse. She mumbled something I couldn’t make out, but she didn’t wake up.

“How much did she drink?” I asked, my voice hard.

“She had a lot,” Caleb admitted. “We all did.”

“But the difference between you two and Estella is that you’d have to drink three times as much as a regular person to get drunk,” I pointed out, my tone flat.

“I didn’t think of that.”

“Clearly, you didn’t think of much tonight, Caleb.”

“We just wanted to have fun,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. I scoffed as I lifted Estella into my arms.

Her body was cold from lying on the concrete.

“If she catches a cold on top of a wicked hangover, that’s on you,” I warned, shooting them a disapproving look.

The least these idiots could have done was put her in Caleb’s car to keep her warm.

“You’re the future alpha of your pack. And you, Sarah. You both need to act more responsibly. If you can’t do that, you don’t deserve your titles, let alone to be around Estella.”

Sarah shot up, looking furious.

“Look, we messed up tonight, but that doesn’t mean we don’t love Estella!”

“I love her more,” I growled, holding Estella tighter. “Way more than both of you. Her safety is my top priority.

“Tonight, anything could have happened to her, and you wouldn’t have been able to handle it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be here, and she wouldn’t be passed out.”

Caleb and Sarah hung their heads in shame. They knew I was right.

“Are you sober enough to drive Sarah home?” I asked Caleb.

“I think so.”

“You think so?” I scoffed.

I sighed and turned away from them. I wasn’t going to leave them stranded, but I needed to get Estella in the car.

I laid her on the back seat and went back to the irresponsible kids who let my girl get so drunk she passed out.

I checked Caleb first. He seemed okay to drive. Sarah was a bit more tipsy, but she’d be fine. I let them go, but I didn’t promise not to tell their parents.

I didn’t plan to rat them out, but they didn’t need to know that. I wasn’t sure they were scared enough to avoid pulling a stunt like this again.

I also made Caleb promise to let me know when they got home.

I got in the car and drove slowly back to the pack and my house.

I couldn’t just show up at Julian’s with his unconscious niece at this hour. I’d have to explain everything.

But I had to let him know Estella was with me, so I sent him the vaguest text I could think of.

I knew I’d have to come up with a believable excuse for why she stayed with me the next morning, but I could handle that.

As I pulled up to my house, I took a moment to relax, resting my head on the headrest.

I had my eyes closed when I heard her groan softly. She was coming to. Good. I could check her over before I put her to bed.

I wouldn’t scold her tonight. I’d save that for the afternoon when I’d be back from the hospital and she’d be sober enough to get an earful.

I opened the back door and found her trying to sit up. I climbed in to help her, and she leaned on me, giggling softly.

It wasn’t the right time to think she was beautiful and utterly adorable, even like this, but I did.

Her scent was stronger than usual, but it was always like this when the full moon was near.

The other issue with her nearing mating age was that the closer she got, the more irresistible she became to my wolf every full moon because we hadn’t mated yet.

I expect it will be nearly unbearable when she’s officially of age, but that’s two years away, so I chose not to worry about it for now.

I brushed a few strands of hair from her face and adjusted my hold on her to swiftly get her out of the car without hurting her.

Half-conscious, she rested her head on my shoulder, her breath warm on my neck.

I inhaled sharply and managed to push my wolf to the back of my mind, only to realize he wasn’t the only one affected by her.

I was too. So much so that I couldn’t move and stayed seated in the back with her.

I told myself it would be only for a moment.

“Where are we?” she mumbled.

“Home,” I answered.

“No,” she whined. “Let’s go back. I want to dance.”

“You can barely stand. You need to rest,” I reasoned, doubting she could understand.

I wasn’t even sure she knew she was with me.

“No.” She squirmed in my arms. “I want to dance and kiss somebody.”

“Kiss who?” I asked, my voice harsher than I intended.

“I don’t know,” she slurred. “I wanted to kiss somebody, but I couldn’t.”

“Why?”

“Nobody’s Max,” she whispered, giving up and slumping against me.

I held her up and put her on my lap, trying to calm my racing heart. I kept telling myself she was just drunk and wasn’t making sense.

Having her face so close to mine wasn’t helping. I had to get us both out of the car. Now.

“Are you Max?” she asked softly, her eyes half closed.

I should’ve been anyone but myself in that moment. Given her state, she would’ve believed anything.

“Yes,” I murmured, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath.

She moved closer, as if she wasn’t already pressed against me. Her nose brushed mine lightly as she lifted her head.

“Kiss me, please,” she pleaded, her lips brushing mine gently.

I wish I could say I was a better man. I wish I could say I respected her drunken state as I should have. But I wasn’t a better man, and I gave in.

I won’t blame my wolf or her for making the first move. The responsibility was all mine.

I kissed her.

She kissed me back with the same hunger, and that’s all I’ll say about that.

When the kiss ended, she smiled at me sweetly, looking at me with love through heavy eyelids.

The next thing I knew, she was asleep in my arms.

I sat there for a moment longer before carrying her into the house.

It was a miracle we made it to my bedroom before she got sick, and it was lucky I was holding her, so I could rush her to the bathroom.

Not much damage was done, but her dress and my sweater had to go.

I pulled a T-shirt (yes, one of the ones she loves to steal when she stays over) over her head and another over mine. Then, I put her to bed and let her sleep.

As for me, I retreated to the study for a few hours, feeling like shit. Why? Because the best kiss of my life wasn’t supposed to happen yet, and certainly not like this.

ESTELLA

I’m never drinking again.

Nope.

That treacherous, sweet-tasting cocktail I had in uncountable quantities last night has left me with a splitting headache, a queasy stomach, and strange illusions.

Let’s start from the beginning. I wanted to do something adventurous for my sixteenth birthday. A guy from school had a cousin who worked at a bar, and he could sneak us—me, Sarah, and Caleb—in.

So far, so good. Our—or rather my—plan was simple.

Have Caleb drive us for our night out, now that he has his license, try a few cocktails, dance our asses off, and be home by two in the morning at the latest, so we wouldn’t raise any suspicions.

I didn’t like lying, especially to Max, but even he wouldn’t be okay with us going to a club. Best case scenario? He would insist on coming with us to keep an eye on things.

That meant no drinking, not much dancing, and no chance of me flirting with someone and forgetting about him for a night.

And I’d have to watch all the women in there hitting on him. It was a recipe for disaster.

Of course, it turned out to be a disaster anyway, but at least I didn’t have to rip some bitch’s (excuse my French) heart out for trying to seduce my Max.

At first, everything was going great.

After the third cocktail, I felt light-headed and happy, and all three of us were dancing and laughing.

Well, Caleb and Sarah were dancing a bit more intimately, if you catch my drift, but it was fine. If you ask me, it’s only a matter of time before they actually become a couple.

Their exaggerated bickering doesn’t fool anyone anymore. Anyway, it was fun until I had too much to drink. Cocktails. I think I passed out at some point.

To be honest, I don’t really remember much except for the kiss, and I’m not even sure if it really happened.

The kiss. Ahhhhhh…

If it was real, then it was my first, and it was indescribable. Or maybe there is a word for it, quite ironically: intoxicating.

Don’t ask how, when, or who. I don’t remember a thing. In my mind, I was kissing Max. Max. Nobody else. Otherwise, I’m gonna have to freak out, and my head still kind of hurts.

It wasn’t quick or soft or boring. It was just as I had imagined it to be. Passionate and leaving you wanting more, and I think it would’ve been just like that even if I hadn’t been drunk (assuming it’s not all in my head).

Sarah often teases me because despite looking all sweet and innocent, I’m not really, or at least not as much as people think I am.

First off, as the people I love often point out, I have a smart mouth. I might seem gentle, but if you piss me off, I’ll tell you off, and that’s that.

Second, I’m not the type that blushes around boys. This happens exclusively with Max and only when sneaky and somewhat dirty thoughts sneak into my head when he’s around.

Lastly, I do like passion. Those kisses in romantic comedies? Well, I find them rather disappointing.

Imagine waiting the whole movie for the protagonists to kiss, and when they do, the guy just gives the girl a peck on the lips, and they live happily ever after.

What a letdown!

My kiss—if I didn’t just imagine it—was nothing like that. It was the kind of kiss that makes you feel all hot and wanting more, like you want to suck his life out through it.

Where you can’t exactly breathe, but you don’t care because all you want to do is taste and taste and taste.

Oh God!

Now that I’ve said taste (three times already), I can still taste it despite the slight nausea from the hangover.

I also suspect that I threw up at some point, but I can’t really remember that either. The kiss, however…

Well, it was one hell of a dream, if that’s all it was.

Maybe it’s because I woke up in Max’s bed. I was wearing his T-shirt, and he was nowhere to be found, but there was a jug of water on the nightstand, along with a glass and a bottle of painkillers.

I’m not a fan of medicine, but if Max left them there, it meant they were for my own good, so I took them.

Still feeling kind of slow, I checked the time on my phone, only to see that it was already two in the afternoon.

I’ve never slept so late, but then again, I’d never drunk before last night either, so I guess it was a time for a couple of firsts.

Caleb and Sarah had both sent me messages, apologizing for letting me get so drunk. They mentioned they’d had to call Max to get me home, as if I hadn’t already figured that out.

I shot them a quick text to let them know I was fine and they had nothing to apologize for. Then, I made my way to the bathroom.

My dress was on the hamper, confirming my suspicion that I’d thrown up in the early hours of the morning.

Realizing I needed a shower, I hopped in and washed up.

I keep a few things here for when I stay over. It’s not much: shampoo, shower gel, a toothbrush, and a change of clothes.

The house was quiet when I left Max’s room. I remembered him mentioning that he had to be at the human hospital early in the morning.

On days like this, Howie would cover for him at the pack hospital. Leslie was busy teaching the pups and wouldn’t be back until later in the afternoon.

Honestly, as I bounced down the stairs, feeling refreshed from my shower, I was relieved that I wouldn’t have to face Max’s inevitable lecture just yet.

But it seemed I’d jumped to conclusions too quickly. As soon as I stepped into the kitchen, there was Max, sipping tea and reading a hefty medical book.

I stood in the doorway, feeling awkward, but he didn’t look up. Thinking he was too engrossed in his book to notice me, I started to tiptoe away.

“Hold on a minute,” he said suddenly, making me jump.

“Sit down,” he instructed, pulling out a chair next to him and setting his book on the table.

Here it comes, I thought. At least he was letting me sit for it. But being this close to him was making me nervous, so I didn’t immediately take him up on his offer.

“Do I need to repeat myself, Estella?” he asked, his tone stern. I quickly took a seat.

When Max used my full name, it meant I was in trouble. There was no room for my usual playful antics.

As I sat down, he pushed a plate with a sandwich towards me.

“Eat.”

“I’m not really hungry.”

“I know, but it’ll help settle your stomach.”

Taking a deep breath, I cautiously started nibbling on the sandwich, waiting for Max to start his lecture. But instead, he picked his book back up.

Knowing Max, he was in the middle of a chapter when I’d walked in and wanted to finish it first.

Sure enough, after what felt like an eternity, he finally closed the book and looked at me.

I expected him to look disappointed, disapproving…angry? I wasn’t sure, but I was surprised to find him looking at me calmly.

I quickly swallowed my mouthful of sandwich and took a sip of juice.

“Feeling better?”

“Yes. The painkillers helped,” I replied. “Thank you.”

“If you hadn’t been so reckless, you wouldn’t have needed them.”

Here it comes! For a moment, I’d thought I might escape the lecture, but no such luck.

“I know,” I mumbled, looking down.

“I’m not upset that you snuck out. I’m upset that you put yourself in danger again.”

“I didn’t, I swear. I just drank a little more than I could handle.”

“A lot more, Estella. And you’re lucky nothing worse happened.”

“Nothing was going to happen, Max. I was with Caleb and Sarah.”

“Who had to call me to come get you because you passed out.”

“Look, I already admitted I drank too much. But nothing bad happened.”

“Really?” he raised an eyebrow. “How much do you remember from last night?”

“Well… I… I remember… uh… we had some cocktails and we… we… danced… a lot.” I was stuttering, but I couldn’t help it. His gaze was too intense.

“So, you drank, and you danced. Do you realize that with the dress you were wearing and how drunk you were, you could have been raped?” he asked, his jaw tightening.

I hadn’t thought of that, but I didn’t want to admit it to him. What I ended up saying was even worse.

“I wouldn’t!” I blurted out. “I just kissed someone. I think.”

I wanted to smack myself for letting that slip, especially since I wasn’t even sure it was true. But being so close to him, where I could see his face… his lips, specifically.

I don’t know… the thought that it could have been him, as ridiculous as it sounds, made me feel all… well, you know. I don’t want to say it.

“You kissed someone.” He narrowed his eyes at me.

I blushed and looked away. “I’m not sure,” I mumbled.

“If you were sober, you wouldn’t be unsure.”

“I… you’re right.”

“You can’t just go around kissing people and forgetting about it,” he scolded, clearing his throat.

“So, I did kiss someone,” I said, my eyes widening in panic. “Tell me it wasn’t someone I shouldn’t have.”

Oh, no, no, no! Now I was absolutely certain I would never drink again.

“No, you didn’t kiss anyone you shouldn’t have, darling,” he said without looking at me. I was more confused than ever. Was he… blushing?