Chapter 16 - One hell of a ride

So no one guessed right who said that sentence lmao, it wasn't conner, no xD

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"I am learning to miss someone without wanting them back."

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Max's POV

My few words froze him down in the spot, a wide range of emotions flashed into the green of his eyes, darkening them a bit. My words opening doors that were shut long ago. Doors that should've stayed closed. The muscles of his jaw worked, they tightened, and the dark gleam in his eyes reflected...pain. He shook his head, "You can't say that," His words came out so low, a mere whisper as he fought inside him a similar battle to mine.

Lines cut between his eyebrows in disbelief, "You're not a mistake, Max," He shook his head again and he took a step forward, "You're not. You can't think that."

I scoffed and looked away, "Really?" I questioned, looking back at him, "You see, nothing you would say would change the way I feel now," I explained, "Yes, I love my parents more than anything, and I am so grateful for them and maybe...maybe they forgave you but," I pointed my finger at him, it poked his chest as I said, "I will never forgive you, for hurting them and for making me feel like this."

My words slapped his face with another surge of heartache, the pain swimming in his eyes felt so genuine, and it had me doubting, does he really care?

"Don't forgive me, I am okay with that, I never forgave myself either," He said, his voice tight with feelings he didn't want, "Hate me all you want, Max, I deserve it," He added and his jaw ticked, his anger directed at himself, "But don't...don't for once doubt how much I love you!" The simple words hit the walls and echoed back, they hit my ears and fought their way inside, "You think I hate you? How is that even possible?"

His bewildered tone had something snapping in his eyes, like for the very first time, he was allowing himself to feel this, "I had to live my life without you, without seeing you grow, without holding you, without hearing your first words...with only watching you from far away and do you have any idea how much that sucked!"

"But it was the right decision to be made," The red lines in his eyes were more evident as he fought for his feelings to not spill out, "The only right decision I ever made, because this was my punishment, I fucked up big time and I needed to be punished," His face etched in pure heartbreak, "I didn't deserve you."

I took a step back, his words riping the wound inside my chest open and I felt it bleeding, "I didn't deserve you, and that's why I couldn't be a father to you, you are not a mistake, Max, the mistake is me, my actions were the mistake-"

"And I am only the result of that action," I stated as I rubbed at my chest, trying to blunt the ache he's causing.

He shook his head, "No, you are much more than that, you are the good that came out of the bad," He stressed out, "You are the only good pure thing that came out of that horrible time," I felt his hand reach for my arm, "I left because I had to, staying meant putting you in danger, staying meant this happening, and the only thing that helped me be okay was knowing that you and your sister were safe."

"If I stayed, more dangerous people would've found out earlier that you are my son-"

"I am not yours," I shot out.

He shook his head, disagreeing, "No, Max, I am not your father, that's true, but you are still my son, I never saw you as anything but that."

His fingers tightened over my arm, seeking control from the mere touch, and I let him, because I didn't know what to feel, "And now, there is no way in hell I can just go back to my life, not while knowing you feel like this, not when I have ruined your life like this, I am gonna fix this Max, I promise, I am gonna prove to you how none of those words you said are true," He said, determined, "You said that I can stay till you find answers," He recalled back and I nodded.

"I will give you those answers, I will tell you everything, anything you want because shielding you from this is not doing anyone any good, and in the end, you will realize how untrue everything you said is," He shook his head again, "You're not a mistake I am trying to correct, no Max, you are the one who corrected the mistakes I made."

I retreated my arm back, letting his hand drop away, overwhelmed with everything he said, his words overpowering the logic in my brain and I couldn't think straight anymore.

"But for us to talk, I need you to be ready...ready to hear the good, the bad, and everything in between."

I swallowed hard and nodded, my gaze drifted away, "Can you leave now?" I requested, because I am still not ready to face all of this just yet. Step by step, or I will lose my mind.

"Okay," He said, his gaze flickered all over my face before he hesitantly turned around and left the room.

I rubbed my hand over my chest, trying to breathe in and out without it hurting, but I failed. The four walls of the room felt like they were closing up on me, suffocating me within their boundaries. I couldn't take it anymore so I pulled out the IV needle from my arm. Blood came out, it hurt but I didn't care. The ache over my chest was much more prominent. I pulled down the sleeves of my sweatshirt, covering the blood, and left my phone in the room before I walked out.

I didn't want to be reached at the moment, I just wanted to be alone, I needed fresh air, for a couple of minutes, not more. I was thankful that my parents weren't waiting outside and I made my way toward the next door and went up the stairs. I climbed up till I reached the roof, knowing it's the last place anyone would find me in.

I pushed the metal door open and the moment I stepped outside, the light early-summer breeze hit my chest and I closed my eyes, breathing the fresh air in, desperately needing it. I stepped forward and carefully sat down by the edge, with one foot on either side of the ledge, dangling them. The wound from the surgery ached and a low groan rumbled from my throat as I settled into a more comfortable position.

I know I shouldn't do this, for my health's sake, I shouldn't be here but I needed just one minute of serenity, one minute away from everything waiting for me downstairs. From Lilly's guilty eyes, from dad's fear of losing me, mom's pain, and from the man who looked at me like I meant the world to him.

I looked down, at the busy streets of the city, their headlights a blur as they raced through traffic. My gaze flickered up to the sky, it was turning pink as the sun slowly went down, signaling the end of the day.

The sunset came as a scattered heart across the horizon, as if the sky itself could speak of both beauty and pain. There is a thin line between the both. A very thin one.

I pressed my palms over the ground and remembered the time when I first discovered his existence; my uncle I thought. I wished he was alive back then. Seeing dad with a brother felt like something I would love to have around.

Now, here he is, my wish came true in the worst possible way ever.

He is here now, making me doubt my own existence.

As I stared down from the ten-story building, being this close to the edge, I couldn't help but think about suicide, not my own of course; as much as life could suck, I plan to keep living mine to the fullest. I just couldn't help but think about those who actually commit the act, about how they push themselves off the edge; do they regret it? Like while falling, do they ever say; shit, that was a very bad idea.

The thought, in some way, reminded me, it brought back images; flashes of dad's scar and a fresh image of the man I just talked with and the scar running up his neck. My jaw tightened and I closed my eyes, unable to face the ugly fact; they didn't have it easy, did they?

I want to know it all, but how can I ever be ready to hear about my father's pain? About...Nikolas's pain? What if I felt bad for him? I don't want that. I don't want to sympathize with him, I don't want to give reasons for his horrible actions. I don't want to forgive him.

I stayed there for some time, right by the edge, looking down at the world, the one I am getting lost in. A maze with no exit sign, a one I have to roam all of its ground to be able to find my way out.

As the sun escaped, the light slowly faded away and the night looked ready to take over. The pain pressed over my wound and I knew I had to go back to my room. Carefully, I pulled myself up to my feet, and my eyes took one last glance at what laid down beneath me.

"Oh my god, please don't jump!" A voice, or more like a panicked screech came from somewhere behind me, "Look, please, just take a second and think, just take a breath, I mean look, life is hard, I know, believe me, but killing yourself that can't be an option, please just step back, please, I am begging you."

My eyebrows pulled closer at the panicked rambling of words and I turned around to meet my intruder. Without much light, it was hard to understand who was standing there and all I heard was her very loud gasp, as she probably thought I was inching closer to the edge, "I am not gon-" I was gonna assure this human I am not gonna jump but I didn't get the chance as very wild hands grabbed into my hoodie and pulled me backward with so much force.

"Jesus," Left my mouth as I went crashing back against her. Her small body couldn't handle my weight and she went tumbling down the floor; she was holding into my hoodie and consequently, I fell down with her.

I groaned at the sensation and felt her arms wrap over my neck, so tightly, almost suffocating me, "I am not gonna let you jump!" She stressed out, and I tilted my head backward and it pressed against her chest, oh nice, before my eyes finally found hers.

Panic swirled into the light brown shade of her eyes, they were wide with terror and she shook her head frantically, her ginger hair flying all around her face and she only tightened her grip over my neck, "You're not gonna die on my watch!" She said, her chest behind me heaving and panting.

"Well, I just had a surgery and you made me fall down, my wound is practically burning at the moment, and you are literally suffocating the air out of my lungs," I winced, "So, I really think we are past that by now."

She gasped and loosened her grip from over my neck almost immediately, finally allowing me to breathe before she pulled away from behind me, almost making my head slam against the pavement, "Oh my god," She mumbled in panic, "Where? Which wound?" All I felt after were hands roaming up my body, inspecting for anything out of the ordinary, "Oh god, please don't be bleeding, I don't want to have blood on my hands just yet," She pressed her knees on both sides of my legs as she resumed her task.

My eyebrow raised, "Well, usually I wait for the second or third date for the girl to be on top, but-" I mean she is practically straddling my lap.

Her fear-filled eyes snapped to my face, they only widened at my comment and she immediately pulled herself backward. I groaned as I pressed my elbows over the floor and pulled my upper body up.

I stayed sitting, trying to get back my power and find my lost breath. My gaze went back to her and she was sitting right ahead of me, on her knees, her head tilting to the side in worry, "I am sorry," She mumbled, guiltily, "But you were gonna freaking jump!"

I shot her a glare, "I wasn't gonna jump!"

Her eyes widened in bewilderment, "Then, why were you one-inch away from falling into your death?"

"I was just having some fresh air," I grated out.

"Like that?" She snapped and pressed her hand over her forehead, "How can sitting by the edge of a ten-floor hospital give you anything that is fresh," She breathed in and out, trying to calm herself, "God, you scared the hell out of me."

My eyebrow raised at her unnecessary panicked state and my fingers pressed over the hem of my hoodie and I pulled it up just to check if I was bleeding, thankfully enough, the bandage was still white, with no trace of blood. My gaze flickered back to the girl, she had her eyes on my bandage and when I let the shirt down, she immediately looked up, her throat bobbed and a bit of pinkish rose up to her cheeks as I caught her staring.

"What happened?" She asked, curiously, and she tucked her ginger-colored hair behind her ear.

"Kidney transplant," I said and her lips parted, forming a low, "Oh."

"But, you're young," She commented, probably thinking I had a disease or something, "An accident," I said, clarifying.

"Sorry for that, I hope you're okay now," She said politely before her eyebrows pulled closer as she accusingly remarked, more like scolded, "If you're still healing, why did you come up here?"

"Like I said, fre-"

"Fresh air?" She questioned, her eyebrow raising, "You could've gone to the garden in the back, why the roof, are you insane?"

I shot her another glare, "You are aware of the fact that you are here as well, right?"

She gulped down as I called her on her bullshit, "I just wanted to be alone for a minute," She said, "Then, this guy looked like he was about to jump off and gave me a heart attack!"

She added with annoyance before she turned her head to the edge that I was standing on a few minutes ago and I took a bit of time, to take her features in. Her hair was shoulder-height, natural ginger. She blinked, and her eyes were of a very light brown color and shaped like an almond. A few freckles covered her nose and then there were those full and pink lips.

I cleared my throat and rubbed a hand over the back of my neck, "Why did you want to be alone?" I asked, diverting my mind from the many many bad thoughts it was having.

She faced me again and shrugged, "Why did you want to be alone?" She asked, raising a challenging eyebrow.

I stayed silent and looked away from her, but she urged, "You know, they say sometimes it's good to talk about what troubles you to a total stranger," She explained, "You would never see them again, they won't understand, they won't judge, and you would at least let it out."

I rushed a hand over my face and when I looked back at her, I found myself speaking, "Well, turns out I have two fathers."

"Awwww, really?" She asked, swooning, her eyes flashing the rainbow flag, "So, you were adopted?"

I stared back at her dumbfounded, "They're brothers," I explained.

She stared back at me in pure horror, "Well, that's messed up!"

I rolled my eyes, "They're not a couple!"

Her confusion only doubled, "Wow, that's even more messed up!"

My eyebrow raised, "So much for not judging."

She gave me a cheeky smile as she leaned forward and placed her head in her hands, "Sorry, go ahead, I am all ears."

I explained the situation, definitely without mentioning the whole...rape part of it. I wouldn't be able to say the words out loud, or even as much as think about it for more than one second. I just talked about the fact that my biological father is not the same man who raised me, and now he is back.

"Well, I have a feeling you want to give him a chance but you're scared," She said, her eyes narrowing as she thought, as if analyzing my words and tone.

I shook my head, "I don't want to," I refused to even think about that, "And why would I be scared?"

She shrugged, "Scared of him hurting you," She said, as if it is too obvious.

I kept silent and she added, "I think you should, you owe it to yourself, not to him," Her words were interrupted by the sound of a phone ringing, "Sorry," She mumbled lowly and pulled her phone from her pocket. The light of the screen reflected on her face, giving me a more clear image of this stranger. Lines etched between her eyebrows and something that looked like sadness flashed into her eyes, "I have to go," She mumbled as she shoved the phone back into her pocket.

I pressed my palm over the floor and pulled myself up. I should go back as well before they get worried. I extended my hand, a friendly offer, and she stared at it for a second before she placed her smaller one into mine and I helped her get up.

"What's your name?" I asked, just realizing that I didn't know that fact just yet.

A smile curved her full lips and she shook her head, "If I tell you, I won't be a stranger anymore," She arched a playful eyebrow, "Which defies the whole concept of what we just did," She gave me a wink and started to back away.

"Oh, also, stop hanging by the edge," She added, nodding toward the actual edge, but her words holding a double meaning.

She turned around and walked away. I couldn't help but smile as I scratched the back of my hair, she's cute.

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Lilly's POV

My eyes grew wide and the worst scenarios played in my head as I walked into Max's room and found it empty. Panic erupted all over my chest as I inched closer and saw that the IV needle was pulled out, and there is a bit of blood on its edges, that same blood tainted part of the white sheets.

"Oh my god," I heaved for one normal breath before I rushed outside, "Dad!" I called for him, the worry rapidly eating up on my inside.

Dad's eyes immediately fell on me, worry cut lines over his forehead and he came to my side, "What's wrong?" He asked, the panic in his eyes matching mine, "Where is Max?" I asked, unable to breathe, the oxygen leaving my brain cells that I couldn't even think straight anymore.

His eyebrows pulled closer, "What do you mean where is he?" He questioned in disbelief before he walked past me and rushed inside the room, to check for it himself.

My gaze fell on that other man standing there and my anger tripled. I rushed forward toward him, my fear had me fisting his shirt into my hands, "What did you do?" I snapped and his shocked eyes fell down on me, "What did you say to him?" I pushed at his chest, enraged, "Where is my brother?"

His hand came to mine, it gently wrapped over my wrist, pausing my hits, "Lilly," He said, softly, his eyes clueless and he shook his head, "I didn't-"

Emotions tightened my throat, "Why did you have to come into our lives?" I rasped out.

His jaw tightened and his other hand came to my face, it rested over my cheek, warm and big as he mumbled, "I am not trying to hurt any of you," He whispered, broken green eyes looking into mine.

Before I could begin to understand how it didn't feel uncomfortable to have him this close to me, my gaze fell behind him, "Oh my god, Max," Relief pushed out of my chest and I stepped away and scurried toward my brother.

He paused in his steps when he saw me and my eyes flickered all over him, making sure he is okay, "Where were you?" I asked, out of breath, the thought of what happened before happening again had something inside me tremble.

"I just needed a minute," He mumbled, and his eyes went ahead to dad, who just looked as relieved as me and then to Nikolas.

I threw my arms around him and felt his wrap around my back, "I am fine," He whispered, assuring me only.

I backed away and nodded, sniffling and trying to hold back any tears. I promised myself I wasn't gonna cry anymore, that I will be strong. I have to.

"Come on, let's go back," I said, ushering him toward his room, "I will go get the nurse to check on you."

A few minutes later, the nurse came and fixed his IV and checked his wound. Thankfully, he was okay and I wanted to scold him for being reckless like this, but I understood what he felt. All of this must be beyond overwhelming for him. Mom came into the room, worried, and bombarded him with questions before she kissed his head, all relieved he is okay. Nikolas disappeared into somewhere and to that I was grateful. I didn't want to begin and understand what I felt.

"Max, I am gonna have to go tomorrow, and I really don't want to leave you," I said, meaning it as I sat by his side and explained, "But my exams are starting and I should be there to attend them," I sighed, despising the fact, "But after that, I will come back right away," I need to graduate so I would never step a foot in that place again.

He nodded, in understandment, "Of course, just go finish your things, I am fine, seriously," He assured me, but it's not gonna stop me from worrying about him every second of the following days.

"It's gonna be just a week, I promise," I added and he shook his head with a smile before his tone turned more serious, "Just be careful."

I nodded, "Of course," I can't even stand the fact that I will have to go back, that place is tainted now, but to be honest, I am not scared, Christian went into hiding for a reason. He is scared. If he decides to come near me when I am there, they will immediately catch him, so he won't risk it. I heard Emma and dad talk, they are already searching everywhere for him.

The thought had me drifting my gaze to dad, his eyes already on me, taking notice of my words and he immediately pulled his phone out and dialed someone, probably uncle Roman, making sure I am all covered when there.

It's still so weird to get used to the thought; that a part of my family belonged to that...underworld.

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"I am gonna call you every day, okay?" I stressed out, squeezing him with my very tight grip, "Be careful, please?" I requested, "When you get out of the hospital, watch for your health, the doctor said you will need to take it easy, okay? And don't you dare forget to take your medicine and also-"

"Lilly, Lilly," He interrupted my rambling, "First of all, I can't breath," He mumbled, his voice strangled and I loosened my hold and edged backward, "And second, stop being so over-protective," His eyebrow raised, "I am fine," He said, "When you come back, we better go back into arguing and annoying each other, I am not very fond of this loving relationship."

I smiled at his silly words and he smiled back and gave me a wink. I gave him one last squeeze and mumbled, "Love you."

He groaned in annoyance, "Too much touching, too much love," He whined and I pulled away, shooting him a playful glare before I turned to my mom.

She immediately pulled me into her warm embrace and I sighed in contentment, "Talk to me every day, okay?" She stressed out, pulling the protective tone I used on Max, "Don't worry me, Lilly, I am already so scared of you going there, so be careful, please," She tightened her hold and I closed my eyes, "Roman will keep checking on you," She said, assuring herself and kissed the side of my head before she pulled away.

She held my face into her hand, "And if you need anything, just call me," She said. I smiled and nodded, "Thank you, mom," I whispered. Thank you for forgiving me even when I've hurt you like that.

She smiled back and brushed her thumb over my cheek, unable to let go just yet.

I pulled into a deep breath and my gaze flickered to dad, he was standing beside the door, his eyes already on me. Anxiousness slowly ate on my inside as I walked to his side. I nervously tucked my hair behind my ear, my eyes not daring to meet his, "I will just be there for a week for the exams, and then I will come back," I said, assuring him this is my only motive behind going.

He nodded his head, "If you need anything, or if anything happens, immediately call me," He said, his tone normal, not angry, not disappointed, but it wasn't as warm as it once was and that alone broke my heart.

"Come on, let me drive you to the airport," He said and I shook my head, "I already talked with uncle Ashton, he'll drop me off, he is waiting for me downstairs."

"Oh...okay," He said, a bit taken aback.

I swallowed hard and nodded. I noticed his fingers on the side twitching before he curled them into a fist, "Be careful, Lilly."

Lilly...no more little bug.

The thought had my throat tightening and I nodded again, "Bye, Dad," I mumbled and walked past him, leaving the room.

Few steps later and I paused, the emotions overwhelming my body. I wanted to hug him, I wish I did. I wish he did. I pressed my eyes shut, trapping the tears that threatened to come back. I will fix this. Once I come back, I will fix this, I have to. He would've calmed down by then and I will fix this. I will make him forgive me, because I miss him so much.

Once I reached the exit and was about to walk out, my eyes fell on Nikolas, walking inside. He noticed my presence and headed in my direction. I tried to walk away, running from him but he was faster and blocked my way.

I tightened my jaw and looked up, "What do you want?"

His gaze fell into my hand and his hand shot there, my eyes widened when he snatched the phone for my grip, "Give me my phone back!" I snapped, trying to reach for it, but he grasped my wrist, stopping me. I tried to reach for it with my other hand but he held that as well, ever so effortlessly as he typed something over my phone.

I groaned and right when I was about to scream again, he let me go and gave my phone back, "This is my number," He said, his tone strict, "I am gonna be in the UK; so, anything, as small as it can be, happens, you call me."

I shot him a glare, "I am not gonna call you!" I assured him.

He held me with a strong stare, "If anything happens, you will."

My jaw tightened and his smugness and I walked past him and headed for uncle Ashton's car, when I got inside, I buckled my seatbelt and he gave me a smile, "You ready?"

I nodded, and I mirrored his smile, "Yeah."

But, no, I was no way near ready. I stared back at the hospital as it faded away and I sighed in defeat. There are so many things I need to fix. Determination filled me in. I will. I am gonna correct every mistake I did. It's still not too late.

*************

My flight got postponed and I've been staring at the couple sitting on the stools right across from me for more than an hour. The young man had a small little baby, a girl, in his lap. I am not an expert with babies and their ages, but she looked a couple of months old only. The girl's mother was sitting next to them, feeding the baby something mashed and green, it didn't look delicious at all, but the baby ate it with full pleasure, making a mess all over her pink shirt.

Her father said something and the little girl started laughing and jumping up and down in his lap. Involuntarily, I smiled, her laugh is so cute. She tilted her head backward, looking at her father and she smiled, toothlessly. He bent down and kissed her little nose but she ended up smearing that disgusting green thing all over his face.

The mother laughed and wiped it away before she leaned in and gave him a small kiss on the cheek, and they both went back into the mission of feeding the little baby. My smile slowly faded away and a little pang of jealousy hit my chest with a sudden heartache.

I felt my hand press over my stomach and I looked down, trying to visualize what was in there. I never thought about kids at all, but why now, that I lost the chance, I feel like I want it so bad. Not now, for sure, I am still young, but one day soon, why not. Look at this couple, they looked maximum by their mid-twenties, and they already have a baby. They look happy.

But...I wasn't gonna be happy with a baby from Christian. I would've not had that with him. In the mid of that thought, a little image flashed behind my eyes, It was me feeding a little baby, and she had deep blue eyes, just like her father's. My heart stuttered and I shook my head, shaking that image away because that was an impossible dream.

I focused my gaze on the coffee cup in front of me and I played with its edges, too lost in my desperate thoughts till I felt a presence beside me, and the familiar scent had me turning my head right away, my gaze falling into the specific eyes I was just thinking about.

He took the stool beside me. I blinked, making sure he is real and a small smile pulled up at his lips, "Hey you," My shock got replaced with a smile of my own, "Hey," I said, lowly.

I looked around then back at him and I shrugged, "I guess it's normal to always run into you in the airport, huh?"

His smile grew and he nodded, "Well, it's my work."

I sighed and my shoulders relaxed a bit, "God, you're lucky."

"What time is your flight?" He asked.

"In an hour, it got postponed," I mumbled with a bored sigh.

His eyebrows pulled closer at my words, he looked at my passport and pulled the ticket from its inside, he read through the information written, and when he looked back at me, his eyebrow raised, "Looks like I am the one taking you there."

My eyes widened, "Really?" I asked, still unable to comprehend it, "Oh wow, I came with you and I am leaving with you, that's so cool."

His eyes narrowed at me, playfully, "You sure you're not doing this on purpose?"

I chuckled and shook my head, "Hey, no, I am not your cute stalker anymore."

The words had my smile slowly dropping. What the hell is wrong with me? Why talking with him feels so smooth? Just a couple of days ago, I told him we can't be friends, I wanted to stay away from him, but still, he is the one who came and sat beside me.

My gaze fell on the wings pin over his white shirt and without thinking, my fingers went to touch it. My eyes widened when I realized what I was doing, and how close my hand was to his chest, so I immediately retreated back, "Uh, sorry, it's just so cool," I focused my gaze on his eyes and I smiled, "I am really proud of you, you accomplished everything you wanted."

He mirrored my smile and gave me a small shrug, "Not everything, but yeah," There was a hidden meaning I wasn't gonna dwell over.

"Hey, Ryder, Sam needs you back at the-" Someone said and I turned to see a man take a stop right beside Chase, his eyes fell on me and his eyebrow raised, "Oh, who is this pretty girl you're talking to?"

"Edward, this is Lilly," Chase introduced us, "Lilly, this is Edward, he is-"

"Lilly, as in...the Lilly?" The man named Edward stared back at me like I grew another head, before he turned to Chase, "I take it back, she is not pretty."

My eyes widened, what the-

Chase's eyebrows raised, totally not satisfied with this Edward's comment, "Anyway, they need you before our flight," He looked back at me, "Don't worry, I will keep this little girl some company."

Chase gave him a warning stare and Edward rolled his eyes. Chase turned to me and I nodded, telling him it's okay to go, "Have a safe flight," He said, and I smiled, a bit of tease in my voice as I said, "I am sure it'll be a safe one."

Am I flirting with him?

What's my problem?

When Chase disappeared into the crowd, my eyes went back to this Edward. He had the same attire as Chase, but he looked older, in his thirties the least. He leaned against the table, his eyes skeptically eyeing me and he shook his head, not satisfied, "I don't like you."

My eyes widened, what's his problem with me?

"You remind me of someone," He mumbled, more to himself as he rubbed at his chin, and his eyebrow raised, "Also, you broke Ryder's heart, I am not okay with that."

What the hell? Do I have this reputation around here? Or do I have the title written over my forehead as the girl who broke Chase's heart?

He straightened himself and took a step closer to me, "But, I am gonna give you a second chance," Who in hell is this man, "So, let me properly introduce myself," He extended his hand forward, "Captain Edward James," He said and the name felt familiar because it was the name of the pilot on the way here, the one who said that terrible joke, "But, it's Captain James for you."

Oh, he is strict.

"Chase called you Edward," I remarked.

He nodded, "Only the people I like can call me that," He said and I sighed before I placed my hand in his, "Leya Dolan," For the first time ever, I said my real name as I shook his hand, my grip as tight as his.

His eyebrows pulled closer, "But Ryder called you Lilly."

My eyebrow raised, challenging him, "Only the people I like can call me Lilly."

He chuckled and stared back at me, totally amused, "Good one," He commented and pointed his finger at me, "I have a feeling I am gonna like you."

He looked at the barista, "Jeffery, get the girl something to drink on me," He said casually, and Jeffery nodded, "Right on, cap," Edward looked back at me, he placed the aviator hat over his head, he fixed it and gave me a wink, "Keep your seat belt fastened, Ms. Leya, it might be a bumpy ride."

He walked away after and I stared at his back in disbelief. Who is this man?

*************

It felt so weird, sitting down in my seat, ready to head back to the one place I practically ran away from. The day I came here, I was a total mess. I still am, but I came here with so many hateful feelings, I came angry and enraged, now, I am leaving with hurt only. I came very determined to hurt my dad, I am leaving with the guilt and the fear that I would never get our old bond back.

"Oh, it's you, great!" The familiar voice or the sarcastic tone it was said with had me turning my head from the small window and my eyes fell on no one but Conner himself as he took the seat next to me.

My eyes widened, taken aback by his presence, I gaped at him, "That's what you got to say to the friend you haven't seen in years?"

Oh, it has been years indeed.

He was just a boy last time I saw him, look at him now, wow, someone got taller and has been working out quite well.

He turned his gaze to me and shot me a very hard glare, "You're not my friend."

Oh wow, he changed. Or I did.

"Seriously?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

He sighed and rushed a hand over his face, "Suddenly I regret getting on this plane," He mumbled to himself before he turned to me, his eyes narrowed, "You do know it's Chase in there, right?" He questioned, pointing at the cockpit where the pilots and the whole staff must be.

I nodded, the thought comforted me in ways I couldn't understand, "Yeah, he knows I am here."

My words made the color fade from his face, "Oh god, it was really a bad idea to get on this flight," He cursed something under his breath and sank into his seat, "He knows you're here, oh man, this plane is so gonna crash right now."

I rolled my eyes. He didn't change one bit. Still very dramatic.

"Why are you going to the UK?" I asked, curiously.

He turned to me and shot me a very hard glare. He took the headphones from around his neck and placed them over his ears, "If you don't mind, Miss," My eyes widened at his fake formality, "I don't wanna be disturbed throughout the whole flight or I will demand a seat-exchange!"

"Why are you so mad at me?" I asked, pulling on the sweet innocent tone.

His eyebrow raised and he scoffed, like I am supposed to know the answer to that before he turned away, totally ignoring me.

Does everyone just hate me?

I tried to leave him for now. It's a long flight, he'll warm up to me sooner or later. He has to. I will force him. I am so sick of people ignoring me and hating me.

The plane started to move forward and I heard Edward's voice as he did the mandatory announcement. It felt so strange to know the man behind that voice and even stranger to know exactly who is the man sitting right next to him in there.

It felt so strange, to have this much close.

"Also, I advise you to fasten your seatbelts really good," Edward added, a hint of playfulness in his tone, "I have a feeling it's gonna be one hell of a ride."

The insinuation behind his words had me smiling and I shook my head. It was a hell of a ride before, I won't be surprised anymore with whatever this ride might force on me next.

Conner beside me probably didn't get the playfulness of Edward's words, "Oh great," He mumbled, nervously and his fingers tightened over the armrest as the plane got ready for the departure. I noticed the bob in his throat, the hard swallow, and the way he looked so very uncomfortable.

"Are you scared?" I asked, unable to hide my smile.

He looked at me, "No, I am not," He said with a roll of his eyes.

I chuckled, "Oh, you are so scared!" I commented and he hissed at me, "I am not!"

He rushed a hand over his face, "Flying makes me...nervous, that's all."

"Aww, do you want me to hug you?" I asked and he shot me a glare, "Don't you dare touch me."

My hand reached for his and I took it into my hold, I tried to divert the conversation to busy his mind, "I kind of missed you," I said, and he looked so unimpressed, "Come on, didn't you miss your mother?" I recalled back his old joke.

"You're not my mother," He scoffed and I felt his hand relax a bit in my hold.

"Who is then?" My jaw tightened, "Aylin?"

"Eww, no," He said in disgust, totally forgetting that the plane is moving.

My eyebrow raised, "See, no matter who your father ends up with, I am gonna still be your mother always," I said the words ever so seriously, which had him breaking down that frown and he chuckled, he tried to hide it but he failed.

"You're unbelievable," He commented, a smile curving his lips.

I nodded, "And you're in the air now, and you didn't feel it," I said, feeling accomplished.

My words had him looking at the window, "Holy shit, I really didn't," His gaze fell back at me and his eyes narrowed, playfully before he placed his arm around my shoulder and pulled me into a side hug, "Okay, I admit, I missed you, but just a little bit."

I smiled, satisfied and when he removed his arm, I asked, "So, what's taking you to the UK?"

"The company I work at has a branch in there, and apparently there is a problem only I can solve," He said, ever so modestly.

"Still cocky I see," I said and he nodded smugly, "Always."

************

This flight was different from the last one. Last time, I left the plane so alone. Now, I was surrounded by three tall men.

"Okay Ryder, I have some errands to run around the city," Edward said, tapping a hand over Chase's shoulder, "Meet you tomorrow for our flight back."

He turned to me, "I guess I will be seeing you around, Ms. Leya," He said, ever so amused.

I matched his tone and nodded, "I guess so, Captain James."

He smiled, said something to Chase that I didn't catch before he walked away.

"He pulled the Captain James crap on you as well, didn't he?" Conner asked, the memory annoying him.

"So, are you leaving tomorrow as well?" I asked and he shook his head, "No, I am here for as long as my work takes, maybe a week and maybe a day, who knows."

I turned to Chase, "Where will you be-"

Before I could complete my question, I heard Sally's voice, "Lilly!" I turned around to see her running toward me.

When I told her to pick me up from the airport, I definitely didn't expect to arrive with two guys from our past.

She was panting when she reached me, "Oh god, there was this accident on the road and-" She panted and pressed her palms over her thighs, trying to catch a breath, "I am sorry I am late, how long did you-" She looked up and words caught in her throat when her eyes fell on the two people behind me, they widened, "Co...Conner?" She stuttered, totally taken aback as her gaze flickered to Chase, "Chase?"

She looked back at me, her eyes so wide and she whispered, "You see them as well, right?" She mumbled, "It's not just me, right?"

I nodded and sighed at her silliness. Her eyes settled back on Conner and I stared at them, excited to see how this will play out, considering now I know that they shared something from before.

Conner's gaze was pure breathless, a small smile pulled up the corner of his lips, a smile so different from the one he gave me on the plane, "Hey," He said.

Sally's cheeks were burning, "Hey," She said, the word barely making it out of her lips.

Conner pointed at her head, "You cut your hair," He noticed and she nodded, smiling as she played with the short strands, "Uh, yeah, also changed the color a bit," He nodded, his gaze is of someone slowly melting, "Yeah, it's really nice."

My eyes turned to Chase as he stopped beside me, he lowered his head, to reach my height, his eyes on them as he whispered, so confused, "What's happening exactly?"

I chuckled lowly and tiptoed to reach his ear, "If we weren't here, they would've probably kissed."

He turned his head to me, his face at very close proximity now, and his eyebrow raised, "He is practically flirting with her hair."

I shrugged and whispered, "It's Conner, what do you expect?"

That had him smiling, a mischievous one, and my stomach tightened in a very weird way, just now realizing how close his body is to me, and how smoothly we are acting around each other, like it's those old days.

The thought only tightened the knots over my stomach more and I backed away, building the necessary distance. For god's sake, he has a girlfriend, I can't do this. I can't be so close to him like that. I am a lot of things, but not this.

Sally and Conner exchanged a short supposedly friendly hug, before Sally turned to Chase, "Hey, it's been a while," She said, with a smile before she inched closer and gave him that little friendly hug, for old time's sake. My eyes widened, what the-

I didn't even hug him.

The next thing I felt was Sally's arms wrapping around me, "I missed you," She mumbled into my shoulder, her tone telling me we have so much we need to talk about.

I hugged her back, "Me too," I said, meaning it.

When she pulled away, her gaze fell on them, "Uh, so where will you stay?"

"A hotel," Chase answered, "It's not so far from here."

"Come on, you came this far, you should stay at our place," She said, so generously offering and my eyes widened in pure terror, "You already had a long tiring flight, our house would be more comfortable and you're probably hungry, I can prepare something for you all-"

"What the hell are you doing!" I hissed at her, to which she just elbowed me in the side, shutting me up.

Conner's eyes lightened up at the offer, "Uh no, I think it's better if we stay at the hotel," Chase said and Conner shot him a hard glare.

Sally was still persistent and she shook her head, "Come on, I can't even remember the last time the four of us were in the same place at the same time," Her words had Chase and me exchanging a look. He didn't want this as much as me.

"Yes, can we?" Conner asked, looking at Chase like a little kid waiting for his candy, "Please, can we?"

Chase's jaw tightened and he shot Conner a hard glare and I was planning my revenge plan against Sally. Conner said another thing I didn't catch and Chase sighed, he eventually nodded his head, "Okay."

Conner's grin widened and so did Sally's, and they walked by each other's side as Conner explained why he is here to her, while Chase and I stayed back, staring at the back of our traitor friends.

Chase's jaw tightened, "This is gonna be fun," He mumbled ever so sarcastically.

I rubbed a hand over my throat and nodded, feeling as miserable as him at the moment, "Tell me about it."

**********************************

So, I didn't end it with a cliffhanger this time! xD

So, watcha ya think?

Also, make sure you watched the trailer in the previous chapter ;)

I am gonna go sleep as usual, so excuse any mistakes!

Love ya all!