Tears and Pancakes

*NOT EDITED*

We finally got back to the main pack lands. We didn't really talk much during the walk back, but it wasn't an awkward silence either. I knew we had reached our destination when the many beautiful buildings that I once saw in passing graced me with their appearance. Even though it was dark outside, the moon illuminated them perfectly. Mason led us to the one that is in the middle, which also happened to be the biggest one. Since I had accessed this mansion from the underground tunnels, I didn't really know what it looked like on the outside. Also, when I ran away earlier today, I didn't really pay attention to how beautiful and intricately designed everything in this pack was. I was assuming that this was the pack house for the alphas and betas, since I didn't really meet a lot of people during my time there. Granted it was only about two days, but I didn't hear any conversations either. By the time I got to "my" room, I noticed that it had become relatively late, so I took a shower, got dressed in the clothes I found in the walk-in closet, brushed my teeth, and went to sleep.

I woke up the next morning and decided to go downstairs and get something to eat. I didn't have enough food yesterday, and I was starving. I made a significant effort to remember where the kitchen was since I first arrived here but managed to get lost along the way anyway. As I was looking around the halls, I started seeing a few unnoticeable inconsistencies in the tiles. Could these all really be secret passageways around this place? Or is it just because the buildings are old? Mason mentioned that only betas and alphas of the Blood Venom Pack know about these tunnels. Why would they keep this information unknown to the pack members? This pack keeps getting more mysterious to me by the second, but I plan to unravel all its secrets. Who knows how long I will be staying here, and it would be cool to venture into the unknowns of the Blood Venom Pack. More importantly, I need to figure out why my mate acts the way he does, and I think that the first step is to understand this pack, since he doesn't really talk to me. Curiosity killed the cat, my subconscious yelled to me. Yes, but satisfaction brought it back.

I got lost multiple times, seeing beautiful paintings along the way. However, I finally made it to the kitchen, and my stomach announced my presence to the people in the kitchen with the loudest sound possible. I smiled sheepishly feeling the color rush to my face.

"Someone's hungry!" I heard someone say. I glanced in her direction to see a woman with an apron around her waist look in my direction. Because she was a stranger my wolf was on high alert to check for any danger. But, my wolf couldn't sense anything to indicate submission to her on my part. So, she is an omega of the pack.

"Um, yeah, I guess I am," I replied, still a little embarrassed.

"Sit down, dear. I will prepare something for you. It is my job to do that here."

"No, no you don't have to. I can do that, please." I can't believe my mate makes omegas in the pack work for him like this. This woman needs to rest now, not cook and clean for his majesty and his visitors. "I know that he probably forces you to do this. But, not for me, okay? This isn't how things worked in my pack. And I am technically an elite prisoner here. So, don't treat me like I have a higher rank than you. My wolf might have warrior blood, but my pack doesn't exploit omegas and being here doesn't change that," I concluded, feeling terrible for this woman.

"I don't really give a shit what your pack does or doesn't do, Calista. You might have warrior blood, but I have alpha blood. So, shut up and respect how I do things here," Axel reprimanded, then turned to his maid and asked, "Did you pack my lunch, Emily?"

"It is already in the car, Alpha. Do you need anything else?"

"No."

He finally left the kitchen, and I released the breath I was holding. I felt my eyes well up in tears again. Why does everything make me cry? I have got to keep it together.

"He pays me, you know. More than I probably deserve. I'm well compensated. He just needs someone to help him out. And I am happy to do it. We love our Alpha, and even if he didn't offer to pay, many people in the pack would jump at the opportunity to do this." Emily interrupted my thoughts. Well, maybe I shouldn't have judged him. But, this was literally the one good thing I have heard about him since I got here.

"How can you be happy to do it? He is awful!" I confess.

"He's not awful, hon. Everyone in the pack is well taken care of. When it comes to leadership and constituent support, this man has got it. He is just lonely and likes things done a certain way. I have been here for about 5 years now, and I am alive and well," she ended with a smile and a supportive look. "Anyway, what would you like for breakfast?"

"Pancakes, I guess." As Emily started preparing the pancakes, I began to drown in my thoughts. It has been so emotionally hectic for me lately, and I don't know what to think at this point. I wonder where he is going. If he needs the car, he's probably going to another pack's lands. But, I really wish we were like normal mates. I wish he would tell me where he wanted to go and ask me if I wanted to tag along. But, of course he wouldn't do something like this; I am just a prisoner here. I don't understand why he doesn't just reject me. It will definitely hurt and breaking the mate bond will be disastrous. But, at least I would be able to move on.

"Morning," Mason said as he walked in. Emily responded gleefully, and I simply smiled in his direction, trying my best not to make it look forced, but ultimately failing.

"You doing okay?" He asked. I didn't know whether he was referring to yesterday's events or because of my reaction to his arrival to the kitchen. But either way, I knew that I had to put my game face on. If I am going to be the Luna of this pack someday, the Beta shouldn't be thinking that I can't handle the job.

"Yeah, I am just tired," I answered. It wasn't a lie. I might have been physically alright, but I was an emotional wreck. He doesn't need to know that though. "Do you know where he went? He had Emily pack some food for the day in his car?" I asked, hopeful for an answer.

"Calista, if he didn't tell you, then I don't think I should either. It was a personal matter though, which is why there was no need for me to go with him," he offered.

"Come on, Mase! Please tell me. He doesn't tell me anything, and I am really curious why he would leave his territory, three days after I come here," I was basically begging Mason at this point. But, what other choice did I have? The words 'personal matter' came to mind, is he going to see another woman?

"Sorry, Calista, but my loyalty is to my Alpha first. If he didn't tell you, then he probably didn't want you to know. Check it out! The pancakes are ready," he replied. I knew that this was his lame attempt at changing the subject. I thought I was making progress with Mason, but I guess I am still a long way from being able to get my way around here.

We ate in silence, and I know that I probably made Emily feel awkward and Mason feel guilty. But, I didn't care anymore. The only thing on my mind was the delicious food that I was eating, and the thought of missing my mom's pancakes. I miss my family and I wanted to contact them. But, I don't know what my privileges are in this place just yet. And, I don't want to put Mason in a position to reject my wishes again. It isn't up to him, and I shouldn't put him in a position like that. I will just wait for Axel to be back and discuss this with him then.

"Do you know when he will be back?" I asked hopeful that Mason will answer this question.

"Probably by the end of the day today," he responded with a mouthful.

I finished my food, washed my plate, and headed upstairs. I was able to make it to my room without getting lost this time, and I felt a little pride bubble in me. I wanted to make a list of things I had to discuss with Axel. I feel like if I tackle this from a professional standard like a contract of some sort, he would answer my questions more openly. After looking around the room for a bit, I found a notepad and some pens. Grabbing one, I plopped myself on the bed and jotted down the first thing one my mind: when can I see or talk to my family. Then, I started thinking about what the arrangements are going to be further down the line. I listed things like shopping for clothes that are mine and getting my stuff from my home. Then at the end of the page, I wrote down "Lunar Ceremony" and "Mating." I knew for a fact that discussing this with him is going to be mega awkward and uncomfortable. But, that was something that couldn't just be left hanging. I needed to know where we stand and soon. I knew that the mate bond gets stronger by the day, and the more we put off the rejection, the more my wolf will be harmed if he does reject me. Maybe his alpha bloodline can help sustain his wolf without a mate. But, my wolf is depressed right now. If he rejects me after my wolf has committed to his, that part of me might die, and I could get really sick and follow suite.

Thinking about this started to make me feel really anxious. I began sweating so much that beads of sweat were sliding down my face and back. My heart rate was racing, and I felt like I was trapped in my clothes. What is happening to me? Trying to alleviate this, I stood up to take a few deep breaths and contain myself. Does his rejecting me really affect me that much? However, I couldn't ponder that thought for too long as a wave of heat and pain reverberated through my entire body. As I collapsed back on the bed, I let out an earth-shattering scream.

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