𝚝𝚠𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚢 𝚘𝚗𝚎

By the time we are transported back to the sunflower field, my head hurts from thinking so much. Barely any lines of dialogue have been exchanged between Grayson, Hunter, and I. We're all trying to process his words and what they truly mean.

The only time you can feel human contact in the space between heaven and earth is when you fall in love.

It seems like a silly concept, Grayson and I falling in love in heaven. But at the same time, it doesn't. Just because we haven't known each other long, doesn't mean we can't possess the strong, powerful emotion of love.

I've never been in love before. When I think back on my life, there's a lot of things I haven't done. Grayson checks off a lot of things my world needs. Adventure? Check. Creativity? Check. Happiness? Double check.

So, why can't love also be thrown into the mix? I always assumed I would be alone my whole life. If I could barely talk to people, how could I somehow manage to pull a boyfriend out of thin air?

Until he came along. Spending time with him here has completely opened up my thoughts and my heart.

My mind continues to race as the three of us sit down on top of a hill, perfectly overlooking the land. I'm wedged right in the middle of Grayson and Hunter. Two people I care a lot about.

"I know this is a lot to take in." My brother finally breaks the ice by saying.

"It is." I nod my head in agreement.

"At first I was afraid to say anything to you guys, about the L word." He clears his throat and brings his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them.

"You've known about this the whole time?" Grayson's low voice speaks.

"Yes, that is one of the first rules I learned about the afterlife. Human emotions can't exist because you technically aren't a human in this world. Therefore, you can't feel anything. But of course there was a loophole. Love is the strongest emotion in the world, you can't escape it."

"So, that's the only way to gain your emotions back? Feeling love?" I ask, still confused by his words.

"Not just any love. True love." Hunter looks between the both of us sitting next to him.

"True love?" Grayson's voice cracks.

"A soulmate. When you connect with your soulmate, you gain your feelings back."

"So, we're-"

"Hope, you and Grayson have connected souls. They were made for each other. The car accident happened so you can come here and get to know Grayson. You were meant to fall in love with him in this heavenly state." My brother slowly explains.

A lump the size of a football appears in my throat. The goosebumps forming on my skin are turning my body cold. Moving my head, I look back at Grayson. His eyes are already pinned on me.

"I think he's right. We were clearly meant to meet." He whispers.

"I've been holding back information from you this entire time." Hunter lets out an anxious breath.

"What do you mean?" I turn back at my brother, who is displaying a look of guilt on his face.

"I forced you to go to the carnival so you and Grayson could meet. The car accident happened so you would be brought to your own personal heaven with him. I'm the reason there's only one bedroom in the cottage. The reason the butterflies swarmed you. The carnival? The lake? It was all me."

"Wait, so everything that has happened between us is because you constructed it?" My eyes widen.

"Yes, but one of the main rules of a personal heaven between two people is that you can't force anything. It must come natural. I was trying to see if you guys would gain your feelings back, I just didn't know when it would happen. You had to fall for each other on your own in order for it to work."

"And we did, it worked." Grayson says.

"Of course it worked, it was always meant to."

"That's why you disappeared so much? Because you were plotting ways to get Grayson and I together?" I raise an eyebrow up.

"If the car accident didn't happen, you would have shut Grayson out. The thought of talking to somebody and actually getting to know them would scare you. You would continue to sit in your bay window, watch the rain, and take trips to the cemetery."

"How do you know that?" I gulp.

"Because I can see your future no matter what path you take." He looks back at Grayson, who is silently listening to my brother's words.

"And you. You would continue to bitch at any person who tried to help you. You would get pissed off that Hope kept rejecting you and you would take your anger out on your grandmother. You would pack up your shit and leave for New Jersey earlier than expected, never talking or seeing my sister for the rest of your life. If the accident never happened, you two would be alone and miserable."

"That sounds horrible." Grayson says while looking at me with his deep eyes.

"So, we were always meant to be?" I ask, glancing back at my brother.

"Yes, you were. I know the whole 'one true love, soulmates' thing can be scary, but it can also be beautiful." He says with a low grin.

"Normally I'm not good at expressing my feelings because I can never understand them." I say while turning to look at Grayson. I grab onto his hand and look down at our connected fingers.

"I mean, from the first moment I saw you in that window, I felt drawn to you. Now I can justify my feelings because they were real." He says while looking into my eyes.

"I figured out early on that your purpose for being placed here was to fall in love with each other. But I wanted to make sure it was right before I said something to you. You needed to learn from one another and grow as individuals. Do you feel that you have accomplished that?" Hunter asks.

Slowly nodding my head, I look back at Grayson and gulp down the nerves threatening to pour out of my throat. "Yes, I do. Grayson taught me that life is too short to sit around and do nothing. He showed me that you can turn anything into a spontaneous adventure. I learned to listen to my non-beating heart and trust him. Which I wholeheartedly do."

"And Hope taught me just that. To have hope. Life isn't miserable, it's fucking beautiful. I haven't smiled or laughed this much in ages. All of my built up anger has completely washed away. She taught me that good exists in everyone." He says with tears filling the brims of his eyes.

"I do feel love for you, Grayson. I never thought that would happen to me, but I'm really glad it did." I say, also struggling to hold back my tears.

"Me too." He says while leaning over to kiss my cheek. My stomach skyrockets from his soft touch.

"I think you guys are ready to go back now." Hunter says with another smile.

"Like, right now?" I shoot my head back to look at him.

"Yes! Finally!" Grayson says while clapping his hands together.

"You don't have much time, they're taking you off of oxygen in a matter of hours." Hunter slightly furrows his eyebrows at me.

Thoughts of actually going back to the real world cause a knot to form in my stomach. That was always the end goal, but a part of me still doesn't want to leave my brother. I won't see him for decades, and I hate that thought.

"H, what's wrong?" Grayson nervously asks.

I stay silent, continuing to have a private battle with my inner thoughts. I don't have a future planned. I don't want my parents to brush my accident under the rug.

The only reason I want to go back is to be with Grayson and pursue a real relationship with him. Unless..

"Will we remember what happened here?" I can't help but ask.

Hunter places his hands on his hips. "I'm not sure."

"Wait, so there's a chance that when we wake up, we won't remember being in this place?" Grayson takes a step forward.

"Then we won't remember falling for each other." I state the obvious.

"You might forget this entire situation even happened. That is a possibility. But there's also a chance that your memory will replay every moment you had here as your transitioning from heaven to earth." Hunter confirms my fears.

"And we might have severe head trauma. What if we can't live normal lives? What if we forget everything?" I start to freak out.

"Nothing is guaranteed, Hope. But with me on your side, you can never lose." Hunter forces a smile.

Inhaling a sharp breath, a few tears fall from my eyes. "I don't want to leave you, Hunt."

"Wait, what?" Grayson whispers.

"I'm sorry, but I don't. I was thinking of staying with you and passing onto heaven, but that was before I fell for Grayson." I turn to look back at the sad boy. I feel torn.

"So you were planning on dying?" Grayson says, his voice filled with betrayal.

"For a little bit, yeah." I admit, tears trickling down my cheek.

"Why? Why would you want to put yourself through that?" His voice grows louder.

"Because my life is a joke, Grayson. Without Hunter, I have nothing. My parents are delusional and I didn't apply to any colleges. I'm stuck in Renton forever." I say through my sobs.

"What about me? Us? The future we could have together? You're willing to give that up?" He says through gritted teeth.

"I want to be with my brother." I manage to choke the words out.

"Well guess what, Hope. He's dead. There's no coming back for him. But you? You have the chance to change your life, to make it better. I refuse to let you die." He steps closer to me.

"He's right, Hope. Stop pausing your life because of me. The future you can have is filled with happiness, love, laughter. It's everything you deserve." Hunter comes up behind me, placing a hand on my shoulder. The sensation is light, resembling a feather.

"I know, it just hurts. This wasn't supposed to happen to you. I need my big brother." I'm full blown hyperventilating at this point.

"It was supposed to happen, little sis. It was supposed to happen to make you a stronger human being. After feeling this loss, nothing can tear you down. And especially after your car accident, you will make an amazing comeback. You will find your place in the world and be happy that you decided to stay." His voice is shaking as he looks directly at me.

"I never want to lose you, Hunter." I admit while taking in heavy breaths.

"And you won't, I'll always be with you. But you need to move on. Stop visiting my grave everyday, stop sitting in that bay window, stop feeling sorry for yourself. Life will go on, and it will be beautiful." He says while pressing his lips into a line.

He's right. Everything he's saying to me is right. I'm eighteen years old, I have the rest of my life to make up for the ten months that I truly stopped living. I turn to look back at Grayson, who is drying some of his tears.

"I'm so sorry, Grayson. I don't want you to think that I don't care about you because I do, more than anything. Without you I don't know where I would be." I say while placing my hand on his cheek.

"We're soulmates, H. Destined to be together. I care about you so much." He says while pressing his forehead against mine.

"What if we forget this happened?" I say while closing my eyes. "What if we wake up and think we just met at the carnival?"

"Then we'll start from scratch. We'll work our way up and build a real relationship." He inhales a breath.

"Promise?" I ask with a low grin.

"I promise." He says, wrapping his arms around me.

"Hope, let's take a walk for a minute." Hunter's deep voice says from behind me.

Turning around, I face my brother. He's nodding his head while extending his hand out to me.

"I'll be waiting for you when you get back." Grayson says with a low smile.

Nodding, I walk closer to Hunter and grab onto his hand. Since he's a real ghost, the motion feels light and airy.

I look into his eyes and choke back more tears before he pulls me through the sunflower field.