CHAPTER 31- COFFEES AND CHANGES~ Ayesha💕

A Y E S H A : -

I was so wrong.

I didn't get any answers.

None.

I refused to talk to him not only for not telling me of his possible excuses for having such dangerous enemies or that house in which we stayed the night and left in morning but for also the harsh words he said to me which made a deep cut in my heart, this time I am not going forgive him so easily. He can't always just say something to me and expect to everything to be normal so he could do this again. No. Not again. Never now. I am determined, this time I am not going to cry and listen to everything he says. I have my right to get answers.

A tiny part of me was scared that my silent treatment to him won't even bother him. But I can see from his attempts to crack a conversation that it was effecting him.

Good. He deserves it.

I didn't talk to him when we were leaving that identical kardashian's house. I thought maybe somehow I can talk to hajra and try to get some explanation of this, seeming quite familiar with all these, but that woman didn't even budged and acted oblivious.

Now I am sure there was something they all are hiding. What if Farhan is really into some drug dealing mafia team? I've read enough mafia stories of business man being underground don. What if my husband is really some don? Thinking about every possible theories I did not get a wink of sleep the whole night, thinking about what would happen if I didn't saw that man who was about to shoot Farhan, was enough to give me nightmares. I think alot, and thus always my headache.

"I got a call from our neighbours this morning." Farhan's voice snapped me out of my trance.

I looked at him and saw his gaze fixed on the road ahead, glancing at me occasionally.

"Why?" I asked confused.

I looked out of my side of window, watching the tress shining from the morning sun of Ankara city, passing by in blur,

"They said that maybe a kid from our house threw something on their brand new speakers and destroyed it." he says glancing at me through his sunglasses.

Slowly it clicked me, I was so angry after our fight that I threw a shovel down over our neighbour's backyard.

I really did that?

"I wonder- how could they know we have a kid in our house? And how could they say it was- uh from our house only? Someone else might have thrown shovel to their speakers. Yeah I mean they are just um confused maybe? Right?" I ranted out out. Making him convince it was someone else. It always works.

He was silent for few minutes and drove silently. He might be convinced, I mean how could someone think a grown woman- me, could throw a shovel?

"Ayesha?" He called out.

"Hm?" I asked watching kids sleeping in their school bus, which passed by.

"I never mentioned a shovel and a kid could not throw a shovel so perfectly." I could hear amusement in his voice.

"I have a good aim." I mutter distractedly.

"I told them the same." He replies.

It takes me a few seconds to register to what happened.

"I didn't knew you were a angry woman." I heard his amused voice.

"Last night didn't prove you that?" I mumbled and that made him instantly shut up.

We were silent throughout the whole ride to our house, but as soon as he parked inside the garage, he spoke.

I opened the side of my door when he grabbed my hand.

"Why aren't you talking to me?" He demanded.

I took a breath and turned towards him, "Because I don't want to." I gestured at his hand, "Leave, please."

He retraces his hand back, "I understand you might be upset.." he trailed off unsure what to say.

"Farhan," I cut him off, "I don't want to talk to you right now, I am really tired from yesterday."

"I know but.." he sighs, "You are right, you need to rest."

"Thank you," I mutter, opening the car door and stepping out, only to wince from the pain in my ankle.

I heard the car door opening and Farhan walking towards me, "Let me help you."

"No I am fine." I say holding my heels and my bag in one hand,

"If you don't rest, your pain will worsen, let me help you." He says as I slowly take a step, avoiding pressure on my right foot.

He tries to hold my arm but I step back,

"Julia can help me." I mumble and winced the next moment as I set my injured foot down.

"Alright, alright." He steps in front of me, "Stop walking, I will call her but don't walk on your own."

He grabs the intercom from beside the door and asks Julia to help me from the garage door.

"You're too stubborn." He mutters placing the intercom back.

I ignore him and lean against the wall, "It's my self respect." I mumble to myself.

The garage door opens and Julia steps in, "Are you okay Ayesha madam?"

"Yes, Julia. Just a little help." I reply and she immediately takes my bag from my hand and helps me step out of the garage.

"Make sure she rests, Julia." Farhan calls out before we step out, Julia and gives him a nod. "I will be in my office, give your madam her breakfast."

After watching me for ten minutes as I climb up the stairs with Julia's help, Farhan goes to his office and shuts the door.

"Should I give you some painkillers?" Julia asks helping me sit on the bed.

"Nothing." I sigh placing my heels down, "I just want to sleep."

"Alright, madam." Julia smiles picking up my heels and placing it in my wardrobe.

One of the many things I like about Julia, she doesn't asks questions, she does what is said to her.

"Thank you, Julia." I mumble sleepily removing my hijab and laying down, without bothering to change my dress.

"Your welcome." She says before stepping out of the room,

The warmth of my bed, my tired eyes and aching body demanded so much sleep, and I am adamant to do that.

***

"I really wished sometimes if I were a skilled legilimens, like dumbledore." Sakina's voice snapped me out of my thoughts as I was staring outside the window nothing in particular.

I looked over my shoulder to see her propped up against the headboard on my single bed of my old room like she owned it.

"Hm? I thought you only wished if you were heather?" I chuckled and she rolled her eyes and continued munching on her chips.

I shook my head and looked outside of the window again, looking at those little plants which I planted few months back with my mom in our backyard, they all grown now.

"No seriously, if I would have been a legilimens atleast I could've known what's going in that small brain of yours." Sakina asked in a muffled voice, still munching on her chips.

"Trust me, you don't want to know." I sighed looking at the clouds moving slowly in the blue sky.

I didn't talked to Farhan since yesterday, and he didn't even made an effort to talk to me too after I stormed out of garage in the morning, how funny when I thought that we were going somewhere in our relationship, but again we are back to square one.

As much as I am angry with him, I hate the pattern of our relationship.

My ankle was significantly better now, after icing and bandages, the pain has lessen, but Yousuf still recommended to wear the bandage for a few more days.

It's been three days since Sania's wedding, she's gone to London and Safa was gone to Antalya for the weekend. Sakina and me were left alone, so I called her here to my old house, as my mother called me to ask something about a alliance for Murat.

My mom also asked Farhan to come over, but he declined saying he has some important business matter to attend.

I tried to peek on his phone about his mysterious house and team but I couldn't find anything significant. He gets most of the calls from Bilal, which he does not attends in front of me, instead he answers them when he is somewhere alone.

No. I shook my head, maybe I am over thinking all of this, it might be business related, my sleep deprived brain is just messing with me.

"You still didn't tell about your sudden disappearance at Sania's wedding." Sakina asked, I walked towards her and sat on the bed with her, she raised her eyebrow waiting for my answer.

"Farhan had some emergency to attend, so we had to leave early." I bit my cheek as I lied. I hate lying to her, but I don't want to burden her telling about my messed up life.

"All good?" She asks,

"Yeah, all good." I mumble,

"Oh, anyway you remember- what's wrong with your foot?" She asked suddenly startling me, she looked with wide eyes at my bandaged foot.

"Twisted my ankle, and blisters from new heels." I reply looking at my feet.

"Really? Were you running a marathon while wearing your 'new heels'?" she air quoted.

"Maybe?" I muttered looking at my bandaged toes, even my mom freaked out seeing my injured toes, but I assured her it was nothing, after her scolding me not to wear those heels again.

"Ayesha? Were you having a temple run, baby? Or subway suffers?" She asked eyeing me wrily.

I laughed at her and also assured her it was nothing like that sort. We talked for a while and I remembered to ask her about sania and Affan's wedding.

"How is sania doing?" I asked her.

"Ah, After their reception in London, they both are off for their honeymoon in Bali." She said happily and I smiled with her.

"Seeing them I can tell love marriages are so pure." I smile remembering them from the first year of college.

"True," she laughs, "I mean looking at Sania and Affan as a individual, their nature and personality, they really deserve each other."

"Remember how Affan used to always find a way to talk to Sania?" I chuckle,

"I do, and remember how Sania always tried to answer him without getting nervous?" Sakina chuckles,

"We were so shocked when we finally saw them together at the annual festival." I say laying down on the bed.

"Uhm," Sakina hums laying beside me. "That Annual fest."

"That annual fest." I mumble, my mind reeling back to that day.

"Ayesha?" Sakina called out, propping on her elbow,

"Hm?" I asked still dazed in my thoughts.

"You know you can share anything with me right?" Her question caught me off guard.

"Of course, Sakina." I reply looking at the ceiling.

"I always have your back, okay?" She asked carefully.

"I know." I smile sitting back, "You are awesome like that."

She sits up flipping her curls over her shoulder, "That, I know." She chuckles, "But you know where to find me, right?"

I look at her and nod reluctantly. I grabbed her hand and patted it, "You are really my best friend, Sakina. You don't even know what you mean to me." I whisper.

"I just want to see you happy." She says, "I would fight the world for you."

I chuckle, wiping the corner of my eye, "Of course, my fierce warrior."

She discreetly wipes the corner of her eye and pats her chest, "Anything for thy queen."

Shaking my head at her, I picked up the empty chips packet and got up to throw it in the bin.

"Ah, I really wish Safa was here, but what can we do, she had to go to antalya to visit her grandparents and she will be returning on Monday." Sakina says loudly out of the blue, making me frown looking at her.

"I know that. You said to me already, why repeating?" I sat back on the bed, "And why are you speaking so loudly?" I asked her confused.

She looked at the mirror which was at the corner of room and smiled widely. I frowned again, mental this one, telling you.

"You sure you-" I was cut off when I heard the door of my room being open, I turned around to see it was murat, he cleared his throat,

"Mom is calling you both downstairs." he sats and leaves without closing the door.

"Atleast close the door properly!" I yelled after him, he didn't replied, I saw his reflection in my mirror, as he descended the stairs with his palms pressed against his ears.

My eyes widened as it made sense now, I turned to look at Sakina with a sly smile who mirrored my expression and shook my head.

She smiles, "When I came here, I saw he was expecting a certain someone with me, but when he didn't saw he went a little sour and while talking with you, I saw his reflection I thought to ease the lover boy's tension," She winked at me.

"So thoughtful." I returned her smile.

"You know mom is going to Safa's house after they are back, to talk to her parents about murat and safa's alliance." I said my mom's plan which she said me earlier.

"Don't tell me." Sakina yelped exitedly.

"Yes, and," I did double take at the mirror to see if murat was not outside our door and eavesdropping or something, and to my relief he wasn't.

"And mom didn't told him that she is going to Safa's house, she just told him that she is going to see one of her friend's daughter and she made sure to tell that she is very serious about this allaince and she will go and say yes for it on the same day." I said and laughed along with her.

"Now this calls for a celebration." Sakina says jumping out of the bed.

"Fine, but first let's go down mom called us."

**********************************

After convincing me for an Coffee celebration, me and Sakina went to this new cafe in her car, with of course my stone faced bodyguard following us in his own.

I didn't even knew he was here all the time.

To tease him Sakina occasionally stopped the car suddenly making him stop his and abruptly start again, she even made rough turns and he imitated everything, Sakina found this quite amusing.

After finishing our coffees and sending those snaps to safa and sania, we both were leaving the restaurant after paying when accidentally I bumped into a waiter and the drinks which he was carrying fell on my hands and half on my coat on my hand.

The waiter looked panicked, looking at me and the broken glass on the floor.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" Sakina asks holding my arm, "Weren't you watching where you are going?" She snaps at the waiter.

"I am really sorry ma'am, I didn't mean-" I cut him off,

"No no it's okay, Sakina calm down, it's just on my Coat, not a big issue I will go and wash it." I said and assured the waiter that I won't complain to his manager.

"Where are the washrooms?" I ask the waiter,

"First floor, ma'am." He replies bending down to pick up the glass pieces.

After telling Sakina to go sit in the car, I go the washroom, to clean up my coat.

After washing the remnants of the juice on my coat and hands, which I patted myself for wearing a black one, I came out of the washroom and was about to go downstairs to the parking lot, when my eyes caught a familiar settled hair sitting right across the balcony of the cafe.

I walk near the glass panels to get a better look and I was right it was Farhan, might be here for a meeting,

I was about to leave when my breathing hitched as I saw who was opposite to him, a petite girl, with such soft features who could easily pass as a foreigner.

But who was she? My breathing came to hitch again as I saw Farhan pass her a juice so lovingly and patted her hand. He never offers me a juice so lovingly. Who was she? She didn't looked a business associate, her stance and clothing looked totally opposite of it, But why was Farhan was acting like she is the most delicate girl in the world?

My chest constricted, as my gaze went to them again and jealousy and hurt swimmed inside me, her hand was on his freaking arm, she spoke something, and he didn't even bothered to tell her to remove it.

But what if he became annoyed and tired off me and married her secretly?

No, he said he isn't involved with someone romantically, and I know Farhan is someone who would never cheat.

But most of them do too, what if?

I was about to walk off from there when a thought popped in my mind,

Even Farhan had seen me with Danish like this, and misunderstood everything. What if I am doing the same?

I look back to them again, they were just seated opposite to each other and nothing else, in fact now if I notice, the girl looked almost alert, scared and shrink in her seat.

Looking around the table, I raised my eyebrows when I see Bilal and Hajra joining them, Hajra beside that girl and Bilal beside Farhan.

Some relief fused in me, but another thought came to my mind, what if they all support him on his second marriage? Agh my brain needs to stop thinking. I would not jump to conclusions like Farhan did, no I would talk to him about this. I took out my phone from my bag and dialled his number, just wanted to test him I guess?

I saw Farhan looking at his phone on the table but just silenced it and didn't answered. Hajra looked at his phone too and asked him something to which he said something to her rubbing his temples.

I called him again, and saw hajra telling him something and he picked up the call,

"Hello?" His voice reached my ears through the my phone.

I stare at him through the glass panel, not knowing what to say,

What should I ask? Sorry this was a test check? You passed by the way.

"Hello?" He asked again.

"Ayesha you there? Everything good?" He asks, removing his glasses and keeping it on the table.

"Yeah." I said abruptly and cringed how small my voice came because of the panic, and hung up on the call abruptly. I saw him looking confused at his phone.

With one last glance at that petite girl, I abruptly turned around and walked towards the stairs,

I was descending the stairs but stopped abruptly when I was about to bump into my bodyguard Lewis.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him startled.

"You were taking a lot time up there, I was just coming to check up on you ma'am." he answered in his clipped tone.

"I was just coming, let's go" I said wordlessly he moved aside and kept his head high. I eyed him wrily and stepped aside and made my way to the parking lot, to Sakina's white Nissan.

Sliding inside the car, I noticed Sakina was on phone call with someone, and it didn't looked a good one, she had a frown on her face and was massaging her temples. I was about to ask her what's wrong when my phone rang I glanced at it and raised my eyebrows, seeing it was Farhan, after contemplating for a while I picked it up at the last ring.

"Hello?" I asked clutching my bag.

He said something in response but I didn't hear it because of the sound of bikes racing which passed from the road beside the parking lot.

"Are you outside?" He asked again and stiffened, should I lie? But what's the point in lying? It got me nowhere.

"Yes, with my friend Sakina, you can ask your bodyguard louis if you want." I told him keeping my emotions at bay.

"No it's fine, You told me I don't need to ask Lewis about it, and you called me before and said nothing so I was agitated, so care to explain that?" he asked again

I slapped my forehead with my palm, the second call was a bad idea I shouldn't have called him, and who says nothing?

"Um, I called you by mistake, sorry for disturbing." I bit my lip.

"Alright, so should I pick you up by seven?" Huh? He was convinced to fast?

"No." I said loudly startling Sakina beside me.

"No?" He asked.

"No I mean," I cleared my throat, "Not seven, nine will be fine, after dinner." I said to him and he replied with a fine before disconnecting the call.

"So, what took you so long?" Sakina asks, adjusting the rear the view mirror,

"Just lost my way, what's up with you?" I ask her,

"Meh, Family drama, my grandma can't live without creating an issue in house, my sister just called me I have to go there." she sighed and reviving the engine and reversing from the parking lot.

"Anything serious?" I frown wearing my seatbelt.

"No, I don't think so, I have to go and check, here goes our plan of hanging out." she says tapping on steering wheel.

"It's alright, and what is a life without drama?" I chuckled,

After few minutes, she dropped me at my mom's place and I bid her goodbye and walked inside after seeing Lewis bodyguard sitting in his car infront of our house.

I went inside and noticed baba's car now parked in porch, he might be back from office now.

"What are you making mama?" I asked my mom entering the kitchen after removing my hijab.

"Ginger tea for your baba," she said simmering the stove.

"Ginger tea? Why does he have a sore throat?" I frown pouring some water for me in a glass,

"No, he is not feeling well, returning from office today, he looked more exhausted then yesterday," she sighs worriedly, adding some honey in the tea, "He might be under the weather,"

"He was sick and still went to the office?" I ask placing my glass in the sink.

"Yes since two days, and who can convince you stubborn father daughter?" she rolls her eyes and straining the tea in a cup.

"I will give him," I say taking the tray from her and she smiled at me nodding her head.

"Also," she called out, "Give medicines to your stubborn Father, he won't listen to me, you try Atleast," she grumbled and I nodded.

I knocked on baba's room door and entered inside, he was seated on a single sofa near the window viewing some of his office files, coughing occasionally. He spoke without taking his eyes off the file,

"I told you I am fine hira, I don't nee-" he looked up from his file and stopped talking, realising it's me.

His forehead and nose was red because of cold, but still he had to work.

"I brought you ginger tea baba, it is great for cold." I say giving him his tea, wordlessly he closed the file and kept on the coffee table infront of him and took the cup from me.

I went to the dressing table and opened the drawer taking out the medicine box which my mom keeps with her and took out baba's flu medicines and gave it to him with water.

"Here, take these, you will feel better." I give him a few tablets along with a glass of water. He took it again wordlessly, I was about to walk out when called me out.

"Won't you sit and talk with your baba for a while?" He asked, I turn around to face him, the dim light of the lamp, shone on his face, making me notice a few new lines on his forehead,

I nodded my head, trying to conceal my shock and happiness at the same time.

"Of course baba," I reply sitting on the sofa opposite to him.

"How is your health baba?" I ask him, looking at him drinking the tea I gave him,

"It's okay, just a little under the weather, your mother has a habit to exaggerate everything." he shook his head and I chuckle,

"She is just concerned baba, take your medicines on time and you will be fine inshallah," I smile, my leg shaking unintentionally,

I was talking with my father, I was talking normally with my father. It was one of my wish from my childhood,

Before I could ask him again he asked me.

"How are you?"

"Fine," I said swallowing the lump in my throat.

He was silent for a while, I look down at my shaking leg and tried to keep my emotions at bay,

Three minutes later, he spoke again,

"Me and your mother went to a wedding few days ago, it was her friend's daughter's wedding," he says looking outside the window, which shows our inner courtyard.

"The daughter was previously divorced, it was an arranged marriage, without her consent, she wanted to marry someone else, but her parents won in the ego game, got her married and forced her stay in an abusive marriage for seven years."

I gasped listening to him, "Seven years?" I whispered,

Baba nodded, "After many complaints, fights and realisations later, she got a divorce, and three years later, she now got married to someone of her choice, her father at her wedding speech said, 'I am sorry I couldn't give you want you wanted, I am sorry you had to suffer, just because you were bound to keep your father's name and his family's name, I wish I gave what you wanted ten years ago.'"

I swallowed the gravel in my throat looking at baba, "That's so sad." I whisper looking down,

Baba sat up straighter, "Normally I won't listen to speeches, but listening to a father's guilt for ruining her life, it made me think of you."

I snap my head at him, "It made me think of what I did to you."

"Baba," I shook my head,

He chuckle bitterly, "People say if a girl has her father's love and support she can achieve everything, but," he paused coughing, "But look at me, I gave neither to you and forced my only daughter into a marriage without her wish. What made me different from him?"

I felt the tears welling in my eyes.

"Please don't say that baba," I whispered.

"Why shouldn't I? I never treated you like my daughter, never talked to you, never asked you, and you did not complain, why?" He asks,

My vision blurred with tears, "I never knew how to complain."

"Was I that bad?" His voice breaks,

I walked towards him and kneeled down in front of him, holding his hand, "You were never bad, baba, I could never make you bad."

"But I was," he replies, "I am sorry."

"Baba, please." I cry, "Don't say it. I was never angry with you, I never had a complain of you, I never knew how to do it,"

"I never trusted you, never loved you, how do you not complain? How are you not angry?" He demands, his hold tightening in my hand, "You should curse me for ruining your life, for forcing into a marriage, why don't you do that?"

I sobbed shaking my head, "How could a child do that to their parents? How could I do that to my baba, I am not angry at you, and never will be."

"You are not happy in your house, I can see that, it kills me to know, I caused it to my own daughter." His voice turns hoarse, a tear falling from the corner of his eye,

I shook my head, "No baba, you did not caused anything, you don't need to relate yourself to others story, everyone is different, everyone's different, my marriage is different."

"Is it?" He asks, "Then promise me that you never cried in nights? You never cried in that house? Promise me that Farhan never made you cry, Can you?"

My breathing hitched as I stare at him, completely loss at words.

"My child," he sighs, holding my hand securely in his,

"I heard your conversation with Farhan, the night you cried yourself to sleep."

**********************************

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A/N :-

Emotional damage? 🤨💔

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