Chapter 16

HAYLEY

Jax and I are sprawled out in the field, our stretching routine done and dusted. Our fingers are laced together as we gaze up at the cotton candy clouds. My thoughts dissolve into nothingness as I try to form shapes out of the clouds.

I spot a turtle, a piece of lettuce dangling from its half-open mouth, and a smile tugs at my lips.

Jax breaks my concentration, saying, “I’ve been looking into the whole losing your wolf thing.

“There aren’t any documented cases, but there are myths about how you might get your wolf back. We could try to force her out, scare her into showing herself, but I don’t think that’s a good idea, considering everything.

“Another possibility is that your wolf will reappear when she feels safe, which could happen anytime. The last option is that she’ll take over in a life or death situation.

“Since she’s still with you, just not in control, she’s aware of what’s happening. She’ll come back when she thinks it’s the right time.

“I know this isn’t exactly good news, but remember, she will come back eventually.”

I return my gaze to the clouds, mulling over this new information. There’s nothing I can do to bring her back except wait.

Knowing you’re helpless in a situation only adds to the frustration, and that’s exactly what I’m feeling right now.

I nod, acknowledging his words, feeling his gaze on me.

He leans over and plants a soft kiss on the side of my head, making me forget my worries for a moment.

I roll onto my side and snuggle closer to Jax.

***

The sun has set, and darkness has taken over. The moon sits high in the sky, watching over everything.

Axton has tried to teach me about time, but I’m struggling to understand it. So, from now on, I’ll just go by the amount of light or darkness.

Jax is standing in front of the toaster, preparing dinner, while I lean against the kitchen door frame.

A sudden wave of boldness washes over me, and I stride over to Jax, wrapping my arms around his waist. I rest my head on his back, my eyes half-closed, as my newfound confidence is replaced by a sense of safety.

I can hear his heartbeat through his back, and it’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. My breath deepens as I listen to the steady rhythm.

We stay like this as Jax continues to make dinner. I follow him to the sink, still holding onto him, as he fills two glasses with water.

Jax sets the glasses on the counter and turns around in my arms. His hands find their place on my lower back, and he leans down to rest his forehead against mine.

He takes a deep breath and whispers, “Dinner’s ready.” I just hum in response, too caught up in the moment. After a few more seconds, I pull away reluctantly to satisfy my hunger…

***

It’s pitch black outside now, and a serene silence blankets the fields. I draw the curtains in mine and Jax’s bedroom and turn toward the bed.

Jax is lying on top of the sheets, wearing only a pair of grey sweatpants that hang low on his hips. Caught staring, I blush as Jax coughs to get my attention.

I crawl into bed as Jax starts laughing at me. I playfully hit his shoulder.

“Did you just hit me?” he asks in mock surprise. I nod, giggling.

“I can’t believe you just hit me… Come here, little one, it’s my turn to get you back.” He sits up and starts tickling me under my arms. I burst into laughter, gasping for breath.

“Say you’re sorry!” he teases.

“Never!” I reply, shaking my head from side to side.

“Say it! Or I’ll tickle your feet!”

“Okay! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! You win!” I manage to say between deep breaths.

He stops immediately and looks down at me. He leans in closer until I can feel his minty breath on my face.

He glances at my lips, prompting me to lick them. His eyes narrow as if he’s trying to get a better look.

He leans in even closer, until he’s barely a breath away, and murmurs, “I always win,” before pulling back abruptly.

I’m brought back to reality as I realize what just happened. We almost kissed. I almost had my first consensual kiss.

I blink a few times to clear my head, and snuggle closer to Jax, ready to quiet my racing thoughts…

***

I hear movement in the bedroom, but I’m too sleepy to open my eyes. The shuffling gets closer, and the bed dips next to me.

A gentle hand brushes against my face, and I instantly recognize it as Jax’s. The touch sends a tingle through my body.

I open my eyes to see my handsome mate looking down at me with a loving gaze.

“I’m off to work, baby, but Axton will be downstairs. You should go back to sleep, it's still early.” I nod, not fully understanding due to my sleepiness.

I feel Jax press a soft kiss to my forehead. He then gets up and heads for the door.

I watch him through half-closed eyes as he leaves the room, gently closing the door behind him. Knowing that Axton is downstairs, I drift back into a deep sleep…

***

It’s afternoon now, and Lily and I are playing “house.” Axton is waiting outside Lily’s room, giving us some privacy.

In our game, Lily is the mom, and I’m the five-year-old daughter. We have a cat named Mittens, a black and white feline with a feisty personality. In the background, ~Sour Candy~ by Lady Gaga and BLACKPINK is playing softly.

“Hayley! It’s lunchtime! Come get your food!” Lily calls out authoritatively. I crawl over to Lily and grab my plastic apple, pretending to eat it.

Our game is interrupted when Axton knocks gently on the door and peeks in.

“Axton’s heading out to Tom’s to pick up your prescription refill, just like Alpha Jax asked him to do this morning. He won’t be gone long, but if you need him, just have Lily mind-link him,” he tells me.

“Alright. We’ll be here. See you soon,” I reply, my face breaking into a warm smile as I wave him off.

He returns the smile, albeit faintly, and reiterates, “If anything happens, mind-link me, okay?”

I bob my head in agreement, even as I’m shaking it, murmuring a reluctant, “Okay,” like a petulant child. Axton chuckles at my antics before exiting the room.

A few moments later, the sound of the pack house door closing echoes through the room, signaling Axton’s departure.

I sink back on my heels, lost in thought. This is the first time in weeks that I’ve been left entirely alone, without any adults keeping an eye on me.

My mind drifts to my dad and Luke. Are they still searching for me? Have they already found me?

Fear begins to creep in, and an overwhelming need to share my experiences with someone takes hold.

I could confide in Lily. She might not fully grasp the situation, and she’s unlikely to spill the beans given her tender age.

Besides, she’ll probably forget everything in five minutes, but I just need to unload this burden.

So, I do just that. I recount nearly everything I’ve endured over the past nineteen years to Lily. Of course, I omit the grisly details—I don’t want to traumatize her.

Tears well up in my eyes multiple times as I narrate my story to Lily, making me feel as if I’m reliving some of the moments.

Once I finish, I notice a few tears trickling down Lily’s face, but it’s clear from her eyes that she doesn’t fully comprehend what I’ve shared.

She climbs into my lap and wraps her arms around me in a much-needed hug. I didn’t expect her to understand, and I’m glad she doesn’t.

I just needed to share my story with someone who wouldn’t judge me and would listen to my experiences.

When my tears finally dry up, Lily goes back to playing house, already forgetting our conversation and its significance, which I’m thankful for.

A huge weight lifts off my shoulders as I realize that I’ve finally shared my side of the story with someone…