However, I was unable to accept this fact. Unexpectedly, Lou Shumo was the Little Liar.Even if I had never seen the Little Liar in person, deep inside, the Little Liar had always been a woman. Why waa man calling himself the Little Liar now? This man was even my great Senior.
How could I accept this?
At this moment, my mind was about to explode from the extreme amount of confusion. Fortunately, Lou Shumo didnât continue speaking. He was just quietly looking at me.
At this moment, the waiter brought the coffee we had just ordered. After taking a sip, I calmed down a little and said, âSo⦠Shu Ke is a man.â
âThen, when you fooled me before, was it fun?â I grinded my molars and said in a bad tone. My ex-girlfriend had become an ex-boyfriend, which was just too outrageous.
âIâm sorry, Xiaoyu. I didnât mean to deceive you at first, but I never got to explain how I became a cross-gender player. It caused a misunderstanding. When you confessed to me, I already liked you, so I didnât want to tell you the truth.â Lou Shumo lowered his head and said, âLater, when I was in my senior year of high school, I thought that I couldnât go on like that. However, I didnât have the courage to confess the truth at that time. I had no other option, but to leave.â
âSo you saw me afterwards and you had already recognized me?â
âYou were gay all along?â
âIâm not sure. I only ever liked you.â
ââ¦â¦â Lou Shumoâs sudden straightforwardness caught me off guard and made my face feel hot again, âT-then about you being withdrawn, and antisocial⦠Did you lie to me, about you hearing strange voices or something? Because I donât think you have this problem at all right now!â
âNo, I havenât heard those voices since I became an adult, so my antisocialness has gotten better.â Lou Shumo paused, then he added, âBut Iâve been hearing some voices lately. It sounded exactly like your voice.â
ââ¦â¦!!!â I thought. I hurriedly said, âYou must have heard it wrong. Donât think about it too much.â
âMn, perhaps.â Lou Shumo suddenly raised his head and looked at me with an unfathomable look. He said, âXiaoyu, wonât you ask me if I still like you now?â
Of course, I didnât need to ask this, because I knew the answer to this a long time ago. However, it wasnât until today, did I figure out the reason why Lou Shumo liked me. It wasnât love at first sight, which I initially thought, but from online datingâ¦â¦
Lou Shumo, this person, was very good at seizing the initiative. It didnât take a moment for him to dump the problem on me. The matter of him being a guy, pretending to be a girl was not yet done!
But I still canât say that. I know that he still likes me. Otherwise, I would have fallen short when I worked so hard pretending not to know before.
Hence, I had to pretend to be dumbfounded. I asked, âThen⦠Then do you still like me?â
At this moment, Lou Shumoâs eyes darkened and said with a affirmative tone, âMn, I still like you.â
ââ¦â¦â Lou Shumoâs sudden openness left me nowhere to escape. My heartbeat accelerated unpredictably. I didnât dare look at him and said, âW-wait, w-who wants to know this?! Donât you dare change the subject. Weâre still not done with the cross-gender matter!â
âMn, what else do you want to know?â
ââ¦â¦â Although I mentioned this, I actually didnât know what to say. Lou Shumo also explained the reason why he deceived me at that time.
Seeing that I didnât speak, Lou Shumo once again opened his mouth and said, âActually, although I came here today, donât just look at me appearing to be so calm on the surface. I also mustered up the courage to come here. You know that I used to be extremely withdrawn. Even though I have gotten better later on, it wasnât as good as you see on the surface. Sometimes, I wonder what kind of person I really am. After all, for so many years, I have never treated anyone sincerely, except for you. Sá´aÊch* Thá´ Nøᴠá´lFire.ná´t website on Gøøglá´ to access chapters of nøvels early and in the highest quality.
This passage from Lou Shumo made me freeze a bit. It was as if I saw the pitiful Little Liar again.
âOriginally, I didnât want to use the identity of Shu Ke to appear in front of you again. However, if I didnât make this matter clear, it would be a hurdle that I would never get over with. Thatâs the reason why I wanted to be honest with you today. Thenâ¦â¦ Xiaoyu, can I pursue you starting today?â
âHuh?!â Lou Shumoâs last sentence caught me off guard, and made me feel as if I wasnât able to wrap my head around it.
âYou used to pursue me and made it too easy for me to get you. Now, itâs my turn to pursue you. Can I?â
ââ¦â¦â No way! My head feels extremely confused right now, and youâre still here to add to the confusion! Forget it!
I stumbled to say, âSeniorâ¦â¦ Iâm actually feeling too confused right now, so I canât respond to you.â After a pause, I continued, âIn addition, I, we should stop meeting each other for the time being.â
After speaking, I was about to run away, but I didnât expect that Lou Shumo would stop me. He said to me, filled with conviction, âI can give you time to clearly think about it. During this period, I will try my best not to appear in front of you. But Xiaoyuâ¦â¦ I probably canât wait for too long.â
After returning to the apartment, I couldnât calm down for a long time.
I never expected that the Little Liar would be my Senior. Furthermore, this person had stayed by my side for more than a year, like a passerby. If he didnât say a word, he would definitely think that Iâm very stupid, still obediently going to meet up.
In addition, in the end, my reason for proving that I was a straight man no longer existed. Damn it, I just remembered how I spent over a month playing everyday just to get the rare weapon for him(in the game). I also spent a lot of thought on inviting a singing and dance troupe to cheer him up. I even bought the most expensive fireworks package to confess to him back then. In the end, the person behind that person was actually a man.
Iâm really thankful that Lou Shumo told me the truth now, instead of that time when I was really deep into it. Otherwise, I would have withered in fright on the spot.
During the week after that meeting, I started to avoid Lou Shumo. I also didnât go to the Society meetings again. Lou Shumo was a bit discerning and didnât come to me as well. Maybe, he was really giving me time.
He began to frequently entrust different people to send me various flowers though.
When I received it for the first time, I happened to be writing a group assignment. When I opened the door, I saw a large bouquet of roses in front of me. The brother, who delivered the flowers, said that it was sent by a gentleman named Shu Ke.
I was so embarrassed that I wanted to hide. Shit, hey mister, did you want people to know that I, an adult man, was given flowers by another man?
I awkwardly accepted the flowers, amidst the strange looks that the delivery guy gave me.
I originally thought that it was only a one time matter. However, flowers were then delivered every day. The roses alone came in several colors.
I was really tempted to go tell Lou Shumo not to send them anymore, but wouldnât the cold war stop if I did?
Even though I refer to it as a cold war, I still had to spend time in Lou Shumoâs apartment at night. However, I didnât adjust my perspective to look outside. I just stayed inside the dark drawer. Apart from the occasional sounds from outside, nothing else happened.
Thus, a week had passed. Since it was near the final exams, I also began to visit the library more frequently. Itâs where I could concentrate on reading. Otherwise, I would inadvertently think of Lou Shumo.
To be honest, I couldnât tell how I felt about Lou Shumo now. I couldnât say that I dislike him. Liking him⦠That didnât seem to be the case either.
But since I couldnât tell the difference, I just pushed that thought aside.
After eating dinner on Monday evening, I walked in the direction of the library. Unexpectedly, there were two people standing under the pavilion on the left side of the library. One of them was Lou Shumo, and the other person was Lu Na, the doe-eyed man. The atmosphere between the two of them was a bit ambiguous.
For some reason, I hid on the side and listened to them talk.
, donât get me wrong. Iâm just curious.
At this moment, I heard Lu Na suddenly loudly say to Lou Shumo, âLou Shumo, I like you. Letâs date!â
My god, in broad daylight, these gay men didnât even bother to hide it.
For some reason, while waiting for Lou Shumoâs response, I was also extremely nervous. It was as if I was the one who confessed to him.
Just then, Lou Shumo spoke up.
âI have someone I like, sorry.â
After hearing that, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was about to leave, when I heard Lu Naâs voice again.
âThe person you like, is it that Little Junior, Gu Xiaoyu?â
âThen you guys⦠are you together?â
âI havenât caught him yet.â
âOh, then I still have a chance. I wonât give up on you.â
Fuck, what does that doe-eyed man mean? The person had already said that they had someone they like, yet you still donât immediately give up.
âThereâs no chance. I wonât like anyone else, but him.â Lou Shumo said, resolutely and decisively.
After hearing his words, an unprecedented amount of joy rose in my heart, causing the corners of my mouth to unconsciously curl up.
After a short while, Lu Na asked again, âThen I have one more question that I want to ask you.â
âAsk.â
âAre you a 1 or a 0?â
ââ¦â¦1.â
âOh, excuse me. I also happen to be a 1. Then I wonât be entangled with you anymore. Just treat todayâs incident as if it never happened. Stay strong and youâll be able to successfully pursue the Little Junior.â Lu Naâs voice suddenly became happy, making me feel a bit confused.
1 = top/gong/seme/the one inserting the meat stick
0 = bottom/shou/uke/the one whose hole is stabbed
Huntress: Thanks for the wait. We are so close to the end. I might finish this story this month or next month.