the end of "love"

Loving you was a habit

And old habits die hard

A constant I could wake up to

A constant whose face I'd see in the dark

But every habit becomes translucent

When the moon finally shows

And in the midnight clarity

I realize the peace I've gained since letting you go

The bitterness was not needed

I did not need to hold onto a thought

Of a boy I once knew

And who said he cared for me lots

So I don't pray for you at night

But when you enter my head I send well wishes

I don't look back to that final night

What could've been had you looked in my direction

And now that I'm looking towards the future

I know this is the best form of closure

I've felt it all along

I was just too scared to accept it as truthful

So in the re-emerging beating of the once cavity in my chest

I can't wait to finally feel love

Because you taught me love was not what that feeling was

Written on: July 23, 2022