1.17 Here There be Angels
RE: Deity - The Breath of Creation
When I dream, I see everything.
That is both an exaggeration and not. I have seemingly little control over what, exactly, I see, but I can see anything. This time, I experienced the lives of mortals.
Every pain they went through, I experienced. The strength of their emotions flowed through me, every little pain and heartbreak. Celeneâs depression and pain, that sudden unwillingness to survive after the unfortunate death of her fated lover â every inch of it tried to pierce my heart, her cries sounding like my own. Deiâs rage and desperation â watching his beloved mentor die to save as many of her people as she could, the desire he held to fight those beasts until his last breath. Yet he couldnât, he had to tamp down on his desires, the black anger that drove him to hate, because he had a duty to his people. He couldnât fall apart, couldnât deal with his own emotions, because his people were depending on him to keep them together. And he would not fail them; all that, I felt like it was my own.
Even the pain of a child, having a toy taken away I could feel.
It wasnât just on Pangea that mortal souls were going through catastrophes, either. On the planets that circled their own miniature suns, separated from the land of the Life-Giving Tree, disasters struck. Earthquakes rocked continents, hurricanes battered coastlines, and volcanoes erupted. Though no one had died in the actual fight, the aftershocks had shaken the already-chaotic Physical Realm.
That wasnât even mentioning the spiritual pain people were going through, as part of living.
But it was not all bad. I had the pleasure to bear witness to a number of strong souls rise above their situations, striving to aid others and lead them to safety. There were genuine acts of greatness among the mortals, some seeming small and insignificant, some not so much. Warm hugs and praise. Kind words, crude jokes told just to get a laugh, a pleasant buzz, a warm blanket on a chill night. A great leader, inspiring their followers. Followers, inspiring their leader. A helping hand, to lift others up out of whatever hole they found themselves in; and I experienced those moments from both perspectives.
I wasnât really sure why I dreamed like this. Maybe it was my connection to the Four Realms. Maybe it was something all Origin Deities felt. Or maybe it was simply an unconscious desire of mine; part of my being, forcing me to go through this.
But I couldnât sleep long, not this time.
My eyes opened. A soft bed lay beneath me, blankets wrapped tightly about my body. To the right a fire crackled in the fireplace, less to provide heat and more for comfort. A few of my favorite paintings had been brought in; a painting of Keilan and me, boating in the sea of memories, one of the Four Realms as a whole, one of each of my first four children, and more. There was, however, a suspicious lack of Randus and his steaming pot of tea greeting me. I suspected he had been taken away to help aid the Realms.
Reika sat in the corner of the room, playing with her child. Iâd only been asleep for five years, and the little one had grown slowly â appearing as if she was only two, three years old now. Her nine red-furred fox tails swished happily as Reika made a few small birds of pure, white ice dart around her head. She giggled, reaching up to snatch at them, fox-ears twitching, Reika joining in with the laughter as she kept the birds just out of reach.
I smiled at the heartwarming scene, content to just watch for a time. A part of me even wanted to slip away as quietly as I could, let them have their moments. But I couldnât bring myself to.
âMama, Heâs awake,â the little girl suddenly said, snapping her head in my direction. She blinked her big, grey eyes at me, and I wiggled my eyebrows at her, sticking my tongue out. She giggled even as Reika shot to her feet, rushing to my side as I struggled to sit up, feeling surprisingly weak still.
"Mother, lay back down!â she urged, putting a hand on my shoulder, just above my missing arm. I shot her a non-plussed look, easily pushing through the kind gesture. âItâs only been a few years, youâre stillâ¦â
âInjured? I know. Mind giving me a hand?â I asked, wiggling my stump, still glittering with gold light as the wound slowly healed. At this rate it would take eons to fully grow back my arm, unless I took some extra time to focus on healing it. Which I couldnât do yet. There were better uses for my time, and the energy that would require. Reika glared at me for the joke and I cracked a grin. An additional weight on the bed, accompanied by a cute grunt, told me the little one had clambered up onto the bed with me. âWhatâs her name?â I asked, gesturing to the toddler as she plopped herself at the foot of the bed, watching me with curious eyes. Reika shifted from foot to foot for a second but eventually relented, moving to sit beside her child. She burrowed into her side, little arms grabbing Reikaâs dress, tails flicking.
âKei.â Reika said softly, putting a hand on said childâs head, right between her ears.
âKei. Thatâs a good name.â I told her. Kei giggled and buried her face into her motherâs side.
ââs not a good name.â she muttered, voice muffled from Reikaâs dress. I raised an eyebrow at her. ââS my name, so itâs a great name.â Reika rolled her eyes in fond exasperation, while I chuckled, Kei peeking out to smile at me cheekily.
âYouâre right. Itâs a great name.â I agreed.
âMother, you really should get some more rest. If you woke up just to talk to me and Keiâ¦â Reika trailed off, worrying her lip between her teeth. I smiled at her and shook my head.
âI have no intentions to leave this room yet. Itâll likely end up being my new meditation chamber, all things considered, but first I have a few things to do before I start amassing power again.â I explained, boldfaced lying about not wanting to leave the room. My incarnations could only do so much; much of my capabilities resided solely within my true body. One of such things was the power of true creation; Mr. Boxes hadnât been lying when he said that it would take a long time to reach the same level of power as I had been, when I first created the Realms. Such acts of great, casual creation were beyond me, but I could still create if I amassed the prerequisite amount of power.
As such, I had to return my consciousness here if I wanted to create what I needed to.
âAmass power? Mother, you need ââ
âWhat I need,â I interrupted. âIs for you to go fetch Gilles for me. He should be close to the Sun, collecting Void shards. Tell him to bring those as well as the other things heâs gathered, please.â Reika frowned at me, setting her hands on her hips and glancing, hesitantly, toward Kei. The little girl just cocked her head to the side in confusion.
âBut,â she started.
âI raised you four on my own. I think I can watch Kei for a little while without the entire palace catching fire.â I deadpanned. Reika hesitated for just a moment longer, then gave her kid one last squeeze.
âBe good for Grandma Statera. Iâll only be gone a moment,â she said. Kei wrinkled her nose.
âHeâs a Grandpa, though,â she insisted, and I chuckled. Reika smiled softly, ruffled her hair once more, and promptly teleported out of the bedroom. Kei blinked in surprise as she vanished, glancing about rapidly. I whistled to get her attention, wiggling my stump arm. That was getting annoying. Iâd have think about how to fix it â a prosthetic? No, that was dumb. âGrandpa?â she asked, and I cracked a grin, a horrible, evil thought coming to mind. Who said I was a good example for children? Not I. Certainly not for grandchildren; grandparents were supposed to be bad influences.
âWanna set something on fire?â I asked, and Kei nodded rapidly, eyes shining.
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Reika returned to my palace on fire. It wasnât real fire, I worked together with Kei to cast illusory flames onto the roof as we stood out front, on the grey-stone landing pad leading to the front doors, cackling madly. My arm was spread wide, the flickering flames atop the domed palace casting my face in an ominous orange glow. Kei stood right next to me, hands on her hips and tails spread as wide as they could go, as she did her best to imitate me. Her cute little cackle sounded more like hiccups than actual laughter, but she had the spirit.
This little trick did two things; one, it started to teach Kei how to use her magic, even if illusions were only one facet of the nine-tailed foxâs abilities. And two; the look on Reikaâs face was priceless.
âMother!â she screeched, aghast as I broke down into a fit of full-bodied laughs, the panic and worry on her face truly amusing. Kei glanced at me, trying to maintain her little hiccup-cackle even through the dopey grin on her face. Clearly she was my grandchild, for how much fun she was having with this. âWhat are you doing?! You're supposed to be in bed, not - what are you doing?!â
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âPlaying a prank, I believe, Lady Reika,â Gilles droned, stepping out of the darkness of space behind her, shooting me an unimpressed look. âThose flames are not real.â
âI know that. Why are you teaching Kei bad things?â Reika snapped, setting her hands on her hips and glaring at me. I did my best to control my laughter, rolling about on the ground as I was. Kei, meanwhile, ran over to her mother and looked up at her with big, sad eyes.
"Mama mad? Tryinâa be funny,â she said. Reika looked down at her and her expression melted, bending down to scoop her up into her arms. Kei buried her face in her motherâs shoulder, shoot a single sly look my direction with a little wink, before snuggling closer. That little brat, she just abandoned me! Iâm so proud. And honestly, I do deserve it.
âIâm not mad at you, sweetie, Iâm mad at Grandma.â She soothed, patting Keiâs back.
âGrandpa,â Kei corrected, and Reika rolled her eyes.
âI do apologize for interrupting, but I was wondering what you needed of me, Lord Patriarch?â Gilles interrupted, immediately sobering me up. I pushed myself to my feet, dusting off my robes with my one good hand. The illusory flames on the palace vanished with a snap of my fingers, the orange glow they cast replaced in an instant with the light of the Realm Sun.
âYes, sorry, I couldnât help myself.â I said, ignoring the Lord Patriarch title. Iâd given up long ago trying to tell people what to call me. Even my children did whatever they wanted. âI need a few of those void shards you found, please. The biggest ones.â I requested. Gilles hesitated for just a moment, then obediently stepped forward and pulled a jar of shadows out of thin air. I could sense the void within it, nothingness contained and pacified by his power.
With a quick word of thanks I took the jar, popping open the lid to stare at the interior.
âBe careful with these, Gilles. I do not disapprove of you investigating them, butâ¦the void has the potential to drive even deities mad. That rogue god is an example of that,â I said, almost completely exhausting my knowledge of the void in the process. Gilles himself might even have a deeper understanding of the void at the moment than I did, save for maybe knowledge of paradoxes. And if that was truly the case, Iâve been neglecting my own meditations.
There was something about the void that intrigued me, tickling that little power of creation I still held and reminding me of the enormous power I once wielded, when I first created the Four Realms. There was something there. I just didnât know what, and this may help me figure it out.
Gilles paled at my words and bobbed his head, folding his hands into the sleeves of his robe. âI understand. I will treat them with utmost caution.â He promised. I nodded and tucked away the void shards in my sleeve â or at least tried to, before realizing that I was still missing an arm. Silence fell over the group as I stared at the empty space with a frown, feeling intensely annoyed.
âThatâs unacceptable,â I grumbled, looking over my shoulder at the six balls of primordial chaos that perpetually floated behind my backâ¦except for when I was laying down. Honestly I hadnât used them for much yet, but, if they were made of the stuff of creationâ¦I willed one of the balls forward, the roiling mass twisting and shifting as it settled into place on my stump, forming a perfect, albeit discolored, copy of my arm. With another flash of power my robes fixed themselves, a sleeve falling over the new limb, leaving only its grey hand visible.
The chaos writhed, connecting with my intent and nerve endings so it could function as a true limb. I flexed my new fingers â they felt stiff, and unwieldy, but it was better than nothing.
âMuch better.â I said, and promptly stuffed the void shards up my sleeve before returning the rest of the jar to Gilles. âAnd did you find any more of my blood?â
âNo, Sir,â Gilles said with a shake of his head. I frowned but accepted the answer, knowing it to be the truth. âWill that be all, Lord Patriarch? I do have more searching to do â there are more void shards out there.â
âUnless you want to see the creation of an angel, that will be all.â I said distractedly, already moving on to my next project. Karmic energy swirled around me as I pressed the palms of my hands together, divine light radiating from between them. Reika stepped forward, Kei fixating her eyes on the shining light.
âRight now?â Gilles asked.
âMotherâ¦â Reika warned. When will she learn that, just like I cannot control her, she cannot control me? I know I should be resting and not using too much power, but I need to do this.
âNow.â I said, nodding. The chaos of the Four Realms needed true guides to help the most people through it, but I couldn't just make a legion of angels and call it a day. Not only was I not currently strong enough to do that, I just didn't want to. Most angels I wanted to have rise up naturally; but an example could be set, in this case.
Two new souls swirled into existence between my palms, floating out to sit upon the ground before me, awaiting instruction. Power settled about me like a cloak as I considered my options for how to go about this. I doubted they would appear like the angels of my old universe, but there was certainly going to be some similarities. âIn His own image,â and all that.
Karma roared as the divine energy I commanded ignited under my will, swirling down to condense around the two new souls I had made. Kei made a small noise in the back of her throat as a blinding golden light erupted from them, positive karma reaching critical mass and exploding outward in a divine, golden light.
When the light faded, two angels stood before me. Their skin was the color of silver and gold, white horns sprouting from their temples and three eyes blinking at me â two in their normal places, a third in the center of their foreheads. A plasmatic aura of pure white light erupted from the crown of their heads, circling around their bodies and creating the illusion of a halo and wings. Golden light radiated from their irises as they took in their surroundings, flexing their new, muscular limbs. And finally their gazes fixated upon me. They smiled, standing straight and squaring their shoulders.
Silver robes fell about them, the holy aura they radiated expanding outward.
âMotherâ¦â Reika repeated.
âFu Hao. Stilicho.â I said, naming each one in turn. They bowed their heads at the names, thumping their fists over their chests. âYou know what to do.â I told the angels, who nodded.
âWe do,â they chorused, levitating off the ground. âLeave it to us.â And with that they shot off into the universe, both heading in different directions. One to Pangea, the other to the Heaven Realm. Once there they would begin their work untangling some karmic threads, guiding souls into rising further up the karmic chainâ¦hopefully creating more angels and raising mortal souls to that threshold as well.
I sighed heavily and let my shoulders slump, turning back to my palace. Once I resume my meditations, Iâd better set one of my incarnations to fix the building, or Randus will give me an earful. Especially since my meditation chamber has been destroyed.
âMother, why? I thought you wanted to wait for a soul to reach that level naturally?â Reika asked. âThose angels you created may be powerful now, but their growth will be slow, wonât it?â I nodded my head. That was true, and was the downside to creating angels in this way. Their power was initially great, but the growth of said power would be far slower than the growth of a spirit who clawed its way up there, or a mortal soul who did the same.
âI couldnât wait any longer, and honestly, I truthfully do not know what will happen when a mortal soul reaches the level of karma necessary.â I admitted. Gilles made a curious noise, and I turned to him with a patient smile, attempting to hide my weariness. ââAngelâ is a blanket term for spirits that reach a level of such high positive karma they begin to touch upon the divine. One could claim such souls have taken the first true step to reaching the level of a god, though the vast majority will not complete the journey. As such, many will most likely wind up in the service of more powerful divine beings. Mortal souls differ from spirits in many ways, partly due to their ability to mesh with the physical, but the matter of cultivationâ¦complicates things.â I said slowly, furrowing my brows.
Dei, for example, didnât have the best karma in the world, but had amassed quite a bit of power. To the point I wouldnât be surprised if he at least reached the cultivation gate known as âimmortalityâ in his lifetime; something I hadnât been expecting for a while yet. On the other hand, if a soul amassed enough good karma and elevated their own personal understanding of the universe enough, they should be able to achieve immortality as well. That was how I did it in my old universe, and was one of the only methods of doing so.
It neednât be said that was not the case here.
âI see. So karma could be considered another kind of cultivation, then.â Gilles said. I blinked and thought about it for a moment. That wasâ¦huh. That was unfortunately correct. âJust as there is the matter of absorbing qi, or of cultivating the fleshly body, there is also a matter of cultivating karma. And you do not know how surpassing the threshold that would normally mean an ascent into an angel will affect mortal souls.â
âThatâs right.â I said, nodding. Even if I hadnât really understood it that way until he said it, that was the gist of it. âNow, I will be entering closed-door meditation soon. There are things I need to discover about my own powers â which these void shards should help with, thank you, Gilles â and power I need to amass.â
âPower? You still intend to create the Lunar Star?â Gilles asked, no judgement in his tone, just curiosity. Reika hummed, patting Kei on the back as the little one started to nod off.
âYes. Its creation is important to the balance of the four realms and the future of its growth. Without itâ¦well. I wonât say destruction, but things will be much harder. Itâll be a slow process, amassing the power, but I do intend to take breaks and wander about a bit.â I said. âIf anyone has any questions, Iâll have incarnations running about. Reika, dear, I would love it if you would let me spend some time with Kei. Not only would it give you a bit of a break, let you do your own thing, but I do want to get some quality grandparent-grandchild bonding time. But for nowâ¦well, I really do need to rest some.â And with that, I drifted back inside the palace.
Only when I was sure there were no eyes upon me did I frown, casting my senses outward in a brief burst. Where was â
There.
It was slinking away, vanishing almost as soon as my divine sense touched it, but I still caught a glimpse. The Shadow had been watching.
I sighed and rubbed my forehead. Through most of my investigations, that had been all the Shadow had done. Things I'd found had been glimpses, the Shadow just observing from the periphery during large and small changes. Though I thought I detected a bit of anger from the being - who I had yet to see clearly - most of the time its observations seemed to be just that; observations. In fact, I daresay the first thing that it had ever really done was attract the foreign god. Its intentions, therefore, remained shrouded in mystery...though I was starting to catch glimpses of what the answer may be. Only a vague idea, however.
Still, one thing was for certain, as it always was.
There was too much to do, and too little time.