âIf Yernia came, you should have sent her away! Donât you know what you have done?â
It happened while he was unconscious, but Cassian didnât say anything.
The context does not matter.
Only consequences matter.
It was true that he had hurt Yernia, but that was because he couldnât control his power.
Unfortunately, the most important thing was the outcome.
Nothing could take away the guilt that surrounded him, even if he was burning with fever.
Despite the Countâs hysterical shouts as he held him by the collar, Cassian endured it in silence.
He understood that the Count was only worried about her daughter.
***
Cassian had stayed in his room all day while a maid brought him food during mealtime.
The feverâwhich he suffered from due to his inability to control his powerâhad also subsided to some extent.
He was curious about Yernia and he had never been so interested about her wellbeing ever since she got hurt like that.
Cassian wanted to see how hurt she got  and how she was coping up from that traumatic event.
Yet, he didnât move.
Count Cilliard would never leave Yerniaâs side after the incident.
Of course, no father in his right mind would allow a âpsychopathâ to come near his daughter, similar to how Cassianâs father, Duke Lecardo, had protected his mother from him.
He knew that he would have to return to Lecardo  Household without seeing Yernia ever again in his life.
Cassian was a sinner in the Cilliard Household.
No one dared look for him except the maid who brought him the meals.
The Countess must have hated him.
Yernia too.
âShe isnât coming either.â
A year ago, Cassian had hurt his mother, Lily.
After that, he spent most of his days alone to avoid hurting anyone, even if he wanted to be with his mother so bad.
Cassianâs father had told him multiple times that his mother was ill and that had kept her from meeting Cassian.
After a little while, he met his mother under his fatherâs supervision.
Cassian immediately understood what was wrong with their set-up.
He had hurt his mother to death.
âI want to be with you, mama,â Cassian whined once, and his mother gave in to his wish, embracing her only child.
It was supposed to be a happy night until he attacked his mother.
âOh my! Oh my! Oh my! Madame! Are you okay? Please wake up!â
âYour Grace! Your Grace! Oh my! Your wife! She is in trouble! The child had used his power to hurt the Duchess!â
When he came back to his senses, his mother was already screaming in pain.
Since then, Cassian hadnât seen his mother again except the day before she died.
His motherâs life span had shortened because of him.
Cassian bit his lip, holding back a river of tears.
Now Yernia will hate him for the rest of his life like how his father did.
***
Night had fallen, and Cassianâs room had no candle.
Buried under the blankets in the dark, Cassian wondered when he would return to the Lecardo Household.
He wouldnât expect the Earl of Cilliard to take him there, so the only way for him to go back was to go alone.
It was all right.
He could bear it.
Itâs nothing.
He just couldnât stand the thought of leaving Yernia, who had always been sweet to her, without knowing if she did hate him or not.
The image of Yernia, shivering in fear as she looked at him, was permanently engraved in his mind.
Cassian would understand if Yernia didnât want to see him again, but no matter how many times he thought about it, Â it just didnât feel right.
While he was wallowing in self-pity and shame, Cassian suddenly heard the door open.
Oh!
He must be returning to Lecardo Mansion now.
Cassian must be coming home today!
He only brought a few clothes to Cilliard Mansion, so it wouldnât be challenging to pack.
They didnât even have to carry it for him.
Cassianâs eyes widened in shock when he saw someone enter the room.
It was Yernia who opened the door.
âCassian, are you all right?â
His deep blue eyes shook in agitation.
Yernia had a deep scar on her beautiful face but why was she acting like nothing had happened?
Cassian stopped breathing.
He couldnât say anything.
âDid your fever go down?â
ââ¦â¦.â
Yernia closed the door quickly before approaching Cassian.
Startled, Cassian moved away from her, but she had already touched his forehead.
âI still have a feverââ
âIt should be gone by now.â
As soon as Yerniaâs hand touched his skin, Cassian felt like he had been bitten.
He twisted his feet and fell backward.
âDonât come near me. Go away, Yernia! Please!â
He didnât want to hurt Yernia.
âGo away!â
Despite his warning, Yernia strode up and sat in front of Cassian while he acted like a cornered animal.
Yernia held his hand when he tried to step back.
âLet me go. Do you want to die?â
He was desperate to remove himself from her presence.