The Hospital

BROOKE

“Sydney had an allergic reaction.”

“We didn’t have her EpiPen, and she went into shock in the ambulance.”

I keep hearing those words over and over in my head. John sounded serious but calm over the phone, even as the blood drained from my body and I felt numb like I had died.

My whole world is shattering in front of me, all within minutes. First Colin and now Sydney!

How do you not check?

How do you not check if the Chinese food she ordered had a peanut sauce on it? How do you not check if you have the one thing she needs to save her life in case of an emergency like this?

HOW DO YOU NOT CHECK??? is all I keep asking myself, holding my head in my lap the entire ride to the hospital.

Colin keeps reaching over and rubbing my back, telling me, “It will be okay, she’s strong, she will be okay,” trying to calm me down, but I know his focus is mostly on the road. It feels like we’re driving at twice the legal limit.

When we pull up to the entrance of the hospital I jump out before the car even stops moving. Colin follows a second later; leaving the car doors open, he throws his keys to the valet and we take off running to the front desk.

“Sydney Waters was admitted! I’m her mother! What room is she in?” I ask the receptionist at lightning speed.

“Waters…Waters…” the receptionist takes her damn sweet time going through the list of new patients admitted.

“Yes, Sydney Waters…brought in by a Mr. John Moore. She’s in room 324. Down the east wing corridor to the right,” she directs, and a second later, I’m gone, running down the hallway.

It dawns on me, amid all the chaos, that this means John will find out that Colin and I are involved. I mean, why else would Colin be at the hospital with me for Sydney?

But that doesn’t matter. I have nothing to hide anymore from that man. All I care about is Sydney.

I turn the corner and see John waiting in the hallway outside Sydney’s hospital room. He’s on the phone with his hand casually in his pocket, and when I hear a second of his conversation, I really lose it!

He’s casually on the phone talking about sports plays while his daughter is fighting for her life inside that room, alone!

He doesn’t care enough about her to stay by her side. He doesn’t care enough to be in a worried panic like me. He doesn’t care enough to ever want to spend time with her. He doesn’t fucking care!!!

Something inside me just snaps. I hate this man. For all he’s done to me. For every time he’s hurt me. I never want to see his face again. He doesn’t deserve anything to do with Sydney anymore. He doesn’t deserve to call himself her father.

I take off down the hall toward him, and with every fiber of my body I jump him. I pour all my hatred and emotions into hitting him, his face, his chest, his arms, and his shoulders. Everywhere and anywhere my flailing arms can hit.

I know I’m probably not hurting him one bit, but I don’t care. I let all my hatred spill out of my body into each blow.

“YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?”

I feel a firm grasp around my waist, pulling me off of John.

“Brooke! Just breathe,” Colin says, trying to get me to calm down. I didn’t realize until now that I’m bawling my eyes out and hyperventilating. I let myself turn into Colin’s arms for just a moment, trying to catch my breath.

“I FUCKING KNEW IT!” John explodes, looking at Colin’s arms wrapped around me. “YOU’RE FUCKING SCREWING HER, AREN’T YOU?” he shouts, his voice echoing in the empty hallway.

I peel myself out of Colin’s arms and get up in John’s face. Nose to nose. “You have NO right to even talk to me anymore. I NEVER want to see your fucking face again.

“And you know what? Yes, he is screwing me. He’s sooo much better than you ever were, and that refers to football as well,” I say, every word dripping with vitriol. If this is what it takes to hurt John, I’ll play right into his caveman jealousy.

“YOU FUCKING BITCH!” I hear his harsh words in the same moment that my vision flashes white, and I feel a painful stinging ignite all along the side of my face.

He slapped me. John actually hit me, hard across my cheek. Immediately, I feel my body being ripped forcefully back into Colin’s arms.

“DON’T YOU EVER FUCKING TOUCH HER!” Colin shouts at John.

“HOW DOES IT FEEL GETTING MY SLOPPY SECONDS, SCHOLTZ, HUH?” John spits at Colin and in a second, Colin is charging at John. His fist flies through the air, hitting John square in the face and sending him to the floor.

“CALL SECURITY!” someone on staff yells into a walkie-talkie, and I’m distantly surprised it took them even this long to respond to our very loud, very public fight.

Colin comes back over to me and tilts my face up to make sure I’m okay. Behind Colin’s worried face, I see John pick himself up off the floor in a full-on rage.

If this were a cartoon, there would be fire coming through his eyes, ears, and nose as he starts to charge Colin from behind.

“Colin!” I shout, seeing John dart at him with his fist coiled back to swing. I push Colin away from John’s oncoming attack and turn my head, getting myself out of the path just in time.

I feel the gust of wind from John’s hand flying inches from my face, and my eyes follow the trail. Unable to stop his momentum, John plows his fist right into the brick wall behind me.

I hear the bones in his knuckles and hand shattering, like crushing saltines into soup. He immediately screams out in agony, grabbing his mangled hand with his other one.

That was his left hand, his throwing and catching hand. Without a doubt, without seeing a single X-ray or MRI, I know he won’t ever be able to grip a football properly again for the rest of his life.

Colin cups my face again with concern, looking me over. “Did he get you?” he asks. I shake my head.

“Was it everything you thought it would be?” John shouts through gritted teeth. I can tell he’s in agonizing pain, but apparently he still has the energy to hurl verbal abuse at Colin. “Taking it all away from me.”

Colin’s head darts back, giving John an evil glare. “That’s enough!”

“What’s he talking about?” I chime in, confused.

“Well, that’s what you said to me, right?” John retorts. “That you would take every single thing that was mine. First my career, then my wife,” he adds.

“She was never your wife!” Colin growls.

I can’t believe what I’m hearing. They’re both talking about me now as if I’m not even standing there with them.

“Colin?” I mutter, stepping back to get a clearer look at his face. A face that looks back at me, shocked and speechless. “What’s he talking about?”

“That was a long time ago,” Colin mumbles. “I didn’t even know you.”

“You said you’d fuck her,” John says viciously. “I remember it every day, even if you don’t.”

I ignore him, trying to catch Colin’s eye. I know that guys say all kinds of bullshit in locker rooms. But I never thought Colin was like that. On top of everything else that’s happened today, this feels like one betrayal too many.

“Tell me you didn’t say those things.” I look at him in fear. It’s like I don’t even know this person. Like I never did.

Colin grabs my wrists to pull me closer, but then he hesitates, not saying anything.

“Colin?”

“Brooke, don’t listen to him. I just—”

“It’s a yes or no question, Colin. Did you or didn’t you say that?”

“I…yes, but—” he admits, like the words are being pulled out of him.

I feel nauseous. I can’t think straight, I can’t look at him. I turn my back to him, rubbing my face to try to push away the agonizing feeling of my heart shattering into a million pieces on this hospital floor, and the bile in my stomach bubbling up my throat.

From the corner of my eye, I see three security guards turn the corner and rush toward us.

“Brooke, please, just listen—” Colin grabs my wrist, pulling me toward him in an effort to keep me close, but I just want to get as far away from him as possible.

I feel disgusted, used, and betrayed.

“Nooo! Just go, Colin.” It comes out little more than a whisper, as I try my hardest to fight the tears rapidly clogging my airway.

I pull my wrists back to get out of his grip but he struggles to hold onto me. As we tug at each other, my charm bracelet unclasps and slips off my wrist, falling to the floor. The charms snap off the chain and scatter across the hospital tile.

“Brooke, please! I love you,” Colin begs, even as one of the security officers starts dragging him away, and the second goes over to restrain John.

“Which one of you is the legal guardian of Sydney Waters?” the third security guard asks.

I raise my hand, unable to speak clearly yet.

“Are you going to stay with her?” he clarifies.

“Yes,” I mumble, and then nod in case he didn’t hear me.

“And what would you like these guys to do? We can remove them from the hospital if they are bothering you,” he assures me.

“That one broke his hand pretty badly,” I respond, pointing to John. John is still clutching his hand, even as the security guard grips his shoulders so another fight won’t break out.

“And him?” the officer questions. I turn to Colin, who’s stopped struggling against the other guard’s grip. I can only briefly look up at him. My eyes are puffy from crying, my face swelling slightly from John’s hit.

Colin’s eyes are heavy, glassy, and grave. His chest is bobbing up and down vigorously from the adrenaline, but his posture, slumped over in the guard’s grip, makes him look weak and spineless.

A solemn tear falls down my cheek as I speak. “He can leave,” I say.

***

After both idiot football players are out of my sight, I speak to Sydney’s nurse, who says Sydney’s condition is stable but serious, and they won’t know anything more till Syd wakes up.

She also offers me an ice pack for my face.

I sit heavily in the chair next to Sydney’s bed. I feel broken from what just happened. Empty, looking at Sydney’s chest gently moving up and down as she sleeps.

Her lips are still slightly blue, her skin pale from low blood pressure and lack of oxygen. There are breathing tubes shoved up her tiny nose. I squeeze her hand tight, drop my head onto the bed, and just break down in tears.

I nearly lost everything today. One of the officers comes back to find me and get a statement, after they escort Colin out and admit John to a different wing of the hospital for his injuries.

I’ve had enough time to think, by then. I ask about filing a restraining order against John to ensure that he won’t go near Sydney or me again—not that I think he would even try. The officer promises to follow up about it next week.

I’m so, so angry at John, but I’m heartbroken by Colin. At some point, before he even knew me, Colin told John he’d fuck his wife.

I don’t want to know more than that. I’m disgusted at the thought of him. This is what I get for letting down my walls and letting him in.

“Mommy?” I’m startled out of my bleak thoughts when I hear a barely audible voice.

“Sydney!” I cry, bolting out of my seat to see her face. “I’m here, baby! I’m here!” I keep kissing her forehead and stroking her hair, trying to convince myself she’s really okay.

“What happened?” she asks.

“You had an allergic reaction, Syd. With Dad at the restaurant.”

“I was really scared.” She looks at me with glassy eyes, like she’s ready to cry just thinking back to the episode.

“I know, baby. It’s okay. You’re okay now. Don’t worry.”

“Where is everyone?” Syd asks—the question I’ve been dreading. “Are Daddy and Colin here?” she adds with scared eyes.

Maybe she’s remembering the secret conversation I had with her, about how Daddy couldn’t know about Colin.

“No, baby. It’s just you and me,” I say as more tears fall. I’m not going to elaborate when she still looks so weak, but eventually I’ll have to tell her: her daddy isn’t ever coming back, and neither is Colin.