Tides

Tell me what you think, would you?

Also, there are probably minor details I have forgotten from previous chapters, so I apologize for that.

Sawyer excused himself, entering back into the crowded banquet room.

Now, I was left alone with my thoughts and the sight of Elijah. I couldn't help but admit that it did pain me in this weird way to know he was affected at the sight of Sawyer and I dancing.

I slowly walked along the terrace, my steps taking me further away from the other guests who were softly chatting and enjoying wine.  The sun began it's descent, closer and closer to the straight edge of the ocean.

The orange and pink hues casted a soft glow against the clouds. It was absolutely beautiful here. Not that we didn't get great sunsets in New York, but the ocean and its lapping waves certainly added to it's beauty.

I slowed to a stop after I rounded a corner and rested against the marble fence. Some sort of plant grew up alongside the fence, stray vines poking out in the walkway every few  feet. So classy, so peaceful.

I sighed, looking off into the distance.

This whole experience had been surreal and amazing yet confusing.

I thought about Elijah. Very confusing.

I have been ever so grateful of being offered the job, I needed the income to be able to stay in New York. I could never go back to Chicago. But how much could I realistically endure? Elijah was sending mixed signals every which way. And deep down, I know I didn't want to involve Sawyer.

Sawyer would just be another boss I was unprofessional with, it would make everything worse. I need to put him at a distance, treat him like my boss that he actually is.

I blew out a breath, tucking away a loose strand of hair that kept getting near my lips.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Elijah asked behind me.

I didn't jump. I knew he would come follow me. After seeing the face he made I was surprised he wasn't here earlier.

I remained resting on the fence, but adjusted my head slightly to see him just aside from me, looking at the sunset. The warm colors made him look absolutely gorgeous.

"It sure is," I smiled faintly, shifted my head back to look down along the beach that seemed to be only a breath away.

Elijah was quiet for a moment, but I could hear his breathing. It seemed shallow. He walked up to my side and rested his hands on the railing, grasping slightly. The veins of his hands stood out as the sun casted shadows upon them.

"Do you have feelings for Sawyer?"

"So what if I did?" I thought about saying it, I really did. But it would be pointless. Elijah either likes me or he doesn't. By the end of this conversation, I will get an answer.

"No, no I do not." I said. Elijah shifted next to me, but I kept my eyes off of him.

"Are you sure?"

I fought to roll my eyes. How dare he ask if I am sure whether or not I have feelings for someone? Elijah will kiss me one day and ignore me the next.

I straightened up, turning my body to look at Elijah. His brown eyes stared at me with longing. "Yes, Elijah, I am sure I have no feelings for Sawyer. I am sure I do not want to date him."

Elijah opened his mouth, to say I don't know what but I cut him off. "I am sure that I do not want anything more than a professional relationship with Sawyer. I am sure that I do not want to fuck Sawyer."

My voice trembled, but I looked at Elijah, unflinching. I am not living my life to play games. I want honesty and straightforwardness. Nothing less.

He gulped, his eyes never leaving mine. And so, I waited. For any response.

His eyes flicked to my lips and he parted his mouth slightly.

"I have feelings for you, Kyla." His eyes shot back up to eyes, he looked relieved. That he finally said something.

I didn't know how to feel. I did get my answer, Elijah does like me. But...

I laughed. I couldn't help it as the sound came out of me, tears threatened the corner of my eyes, waiting to fall.

Elijah pulled back, his eyebrows scrunched together. "What's funny?"

I wiped the tears away, the smile on my face going away. "You have feelings for me?"

He just nodded, confused where this was going. And to be honest, I'm not sure I know either.

"Yet, you don't show it. You flirt with me one day then tell me we need to stop the next. And then bam, Elijah, you kiss me an hour later! I mean- what does that tell me?"

Elijah ran his hand through his already disheveled brown locks, he seemed to be getting worked up. "I-I don't know, Kyla."

"I need you to tell me what you want from me. I need you to be blunt and unforgiving. Just tell me." My eyes were wide, the adrenaline coursed through my veins like the alcohol once did last night.

Elijah's eyes held my gaze, he was thinking hard. My heart fell slightly, he had to think about it. That tells me everything I need to know.

"I'm not ready to settle. Not yet, anyways." Elijah said, quietly, as a group of people walked by us. "I think, right now, I just want something fun."

My heart faltered again. Then rage boiled in my veins, stomping the adrenaline down. "You want to have fun?"

He just nodded.

I shouldn't be this mad. We've barely conversed enough to warrant a relationship of any kind besides a professional one. It's my fault for beginning to fall for him. Not once did he ever promise a steady relationship with me. I shouldn't be this mad.

He gave me exactly what I wanted. Didn't beat around the bush. He wanted to have fun. I just no longer had any interest in doing it with him.

I nodded back, my eyes searching for a different answer within his eyes. I didn't get one.

"Thanks for being honest." I bit my lip, holding back what I actually wanted to say.

Elijah turned away from me, watching the last of the sun melt away.

The light fell upon his face in such a way that made me weak in the knees.

"God dammit," I muttered, turning to the ocean. This was going to be hard.

"Should I ask?"

I shook my head. "Not worth it, seeing as you just want to have fun."

I cringed, I should not have said that. I mentally slapped myself, I'm only going to make things worse.

Elijah stilled, his body no longer relaxed as he enjoyed the last remaining lights of the day. "You told me to be honest."

"That I did," I gritted out, pushing away from the marble railing. "I'm going to head back inside."

I began to walk a way, but his soft hand grasped tightly on my wrist, stopping me in my tracks. I looked back at him, he was looking down.

He didn't say anything for a moment and I stood there awkwardly, waiting for him to speak.

"You don't want to have fun?" Elijah looked up at me, a barely visible tint of pink appeared on his cheeks.

"Not with you."

I shrugged out of his grip and made my way inside the hall, the crowd instantly hiding me away from his sight.