Chapter 48

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Addison

She flinches to the side —along with Raven and Jasper— when a bullet pings off the floor, "Murphy's gonna do the Grounder's work for them and blow us all up," she sighed.

Raven sighs, too, a stressed look crossing her features as she continues to dig through a bunch of wires that confuses Addison's brain. "You need to do this now," Jasper pressured.

"I'm working as fast as I can," Raven moves certain wires aside to get a better look at what she's searching for, "the wires for the door are mixed in with the ignition system."

"Ignition meaning . . ."

"Meaning that sparking the wrong one would be bad," Raven tilts her head up ever so slightly to get a better look at the next set of wires she grabbed.

"I think I found it. Get outside," Raven flickers her eyes to Jasper and Addison, "Be ready when it opens," she tells them, but Addison doesn't move.

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Addison—"

"It's not up for discussion," their eyes meet, "now do your thing." Sighing, Raven sets the light down and tells Addison to hold some wires out of the way while she goes to work on opening the door.

"Isn't that what you said? That you were just giving the people what they wanted, right?"

"Hang on, Bellamy," Addison whispered when she heard Murphy's taunting voice.

Raven starts yanking the set of wires she needs out of their confined space and starts twisting and peeling away. Commotion above them has Addison looking up in worry, then she hears Bellamy's muffled grunt.

"Raven . . ." she drawled lowly.

"Almost done." She hands Addison the wire she just peeled to quietly set her tool down, "Connect them."

Electricity and her don't mix. Raven knows that but gave them to her anyways. Seeing as Bellamy's life is on the line, Addison nervously touches them together. "Ahh!" She and Raven jump when they shock her, and Addison's eyes widen at the realization. She just gave her and Raven's spot up. "Crap . . ."

Addison doesn't have time to register the familiar sharp popping that pierces through the floor above their heads before she's shoved into an electric panel of some kind. She groans, holding the back of her head as the gunshots continue to fire; until Murphy's gun clicks.

Ignoring the pounding in her head, Addison's eyes snap open, "Raven . . ."

She continued to work at opening the door and ignores the worry calls of Addison. The door is finally opened, followed by quick footsteps that rush in for Bellamy.

"It worked!"

"Guys, he's fine!"

Neither of the boys's voices made it to Addison's ears. Ignoring the commotion above them, she's at Raven's side in a heartbeat, "Raven, hey—" she cut herself off when she sets her hand down next to Raven, instantly feeling an all too familiar warm, thick liquid—blood. She retracts her hand from the small warm puddle that forms and holds them in the light. "Oh no . . ." Raven's blood coats her fingertips, " . . . no, no, no . . ."

BOOM!

Raven grunts —eyes squeezed shut and teeth clenched together to suppress a scream— from the explosion that rattles the dropship. It doesn't register in Addison's mind, nor did the 'what ifs'. She attempts to help Raven, "I'm okay . . . I'm—ahh! Mmmm . . ."

"Damn it, Raven! Why would you do that?!" the panic in Addison's voice was evident in her voice as she applies pressure to Raven's gunshot wound that causes her to hiss and moan in more pain. "That was meant for me," her voice cracked, glossy doe eyes meeting Raven's.

"You really think I was gonna let you take that?" Raven managed a smile through her pained groans. "I guess you were right about electricity not being your friend," she grunted when Addison awkwardly hoists her from the floor.

"Raven, this is serious."

Addison was panicking and completely terrified. Guilt instantly eats her away the more time passes. If she wouldn't have made a sound, she wouldn't be dragging a wounded Raven out from underneath the damn dropship.

Raven bites her lip to suppress a yelp when Addison gets her out from underneath the dropship, but it still slipped through her lips in painful moans, "Hang in there, Reyes . . ."

Addison hoists her back up. She brings Raven's left arm over her shoulder and wraps her own arm around Raven's waist, her hand covering Raven's to apply more pressure.

"When this is over, I'm gonna kick your ass."

Raven rasps an airy chuckle through her strained response, "How? I'll be dead."

The guilt and sadness struck Addison in the chest—hard. "Don't say that . . ." she and Raven round the side of the dropship. "Somebody help!" she screamed to no one in particular.

"Raven!"

Addison snaps her head to the voice, "Clarke?" she whispered, but immediately shakes the shock and excitement that she's not dead, focusing back on the real problem. Raven.

Clarke —along with Liam, Bellamy, Jasper, Finn, Octavia, Callie and Dawson— run alarm up to them.

"Murphy shot her," Jasper voiced what Addison doesn't want to hear, even though it's true. If it wasn't for you, she voiced in her head.

Finn takes Raven out of Addison's hold and scoops her in his arms, "Get her into the dropship," Clarke ordered.

Addison looks down at her trembling hands; Raven's blood coats them, as well as her clothes—her jacket being the worst. All she can hear is her ragged and heavy breaths, the pounding in her chest almost overruling her uneven breathing.

The large muffle of voices somewhat breaks her from her trance on her hands, "It's my fault . . ." she said, inaudibly. Her focus is still on her blood tainted and shaky hands, the sound of Murphy's gunshots ringing in her ears. "Oh my God . . ." she looks up and meets green. "Did I—"

Octavia's arms are wrapping around when Addison cut herself off. She presses her cheek into her shoulder, but her arms stay frozen, not once embracing Octavia.

"I-I-I didn't mean to . . . it just . . . I-I-I—

Octavia turns her head sideways, lips brushing against Addison's ear, "Shhhh . . ."

"I should be the one in there," she strained, a warm tear creeping it's way out of her eye that slides down her cheek. "It was meant for me . . ."

Raven's screams cut through the air. That's all it took for Addison to snap her eyes closed and finally wrap her arms around Octavia.

All the guilt she's carried and kept bottled up explodes; killing Avery Williams on Agro, nearly strangling Maggie —the poor girl that was her cell mate before Solitary Confinement— breaking her mother's promise, even though she had no say on being the Ark's guinea-pig, and Charolette's suicide she could've prevented.

Before she caused the rain of bullets from Murphy, she would've like to have think she was mostly healed, but that wasn't the case. Now she knows.

"Addison."

Her name's called softly. She slowly removes her head from Octavia's shoulder but still keeps her arms secured around her torso. Bellamy stands where Dawson, Liam, Callie and Jasper once stood.

Addison averts her eyes and sniffles. She has to know.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Octavia asked softly, her hands gingerly cupping Addison's rosy cheeks.

Yes. "No," she answered aloud instead.

Octavia takes another step closer, their chests pressing together, "Are you sure?"

"No . . ." Addison looks down and leans her forehead against Octavia's. "Wait for me?" her voice was small to the point Octavia had to strain to hear.

She nods, then removes their foreheads, taking one of Addison's tainted hands in her own. Addison threads her fingers through Octavia's, her heart thumping harder with each step she gets closer to the dropship.

Finally coming to the ramp, they stop.

"I'll be right here, okay?" Octavia gives Addison's hand a reassuring squeeze.

She nods, not once taking her eyes off the tarp that covers the entrance. Releasing Octavia's hand, she slowly creeps inside. Her breath gets sucked in at Raven's sweaty and already paler figure.

Addison rushes to her side in quiet sobs. Taking hold of Raven's hand, she cries, squeezing her hand tighter, "Why would you do that?" she asked again.

Raven smiles softly, "Bellamy does everything he can to protect his sister . . ." she reached up and tucks a strand of loose hair behind Addison's ear, teeth gritting and a quiet groan slipping between her lips from the action, " . . . I was doing the same for mine."

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