Bonus Chapter 4: His Cold Demons
My Fake Boyfriend
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S. A. A
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Why Justin had come to Lexiâs house
His hair was almost dry now, he thought as he used the white linen towel against his midnight locks, his grey gaze on the bathroom mirror in front of him. He was never one to prefer the artificial feel of the blow-dryer heat, despite the time it had taken for his hair to fully dry naturally. Sighing tiredly, he pulled his earphones out, tossing them carelessly onto the bathroom countertop. On a usual day, music would help the restlessness, but he had already established today was not a usual day.
It couldnât be a usual day, if the day had begun with an additional member on the dining table for breakfast. He had internally scolded himself for feeling this way. He didnât know what had caused the misery, even. As long as he had known, his father was the only one to raise him; he hadnât fathomed a thought on what a maternal presence could do for him, yet now, it was different. The woman who had joined them for breakfast was most certainly not one of maternal presence; how could she be when she was just a few years his senior?
27?
He voiced out the number repeatedly in his mind, until it was seared into skin and melded into bone; until all he could hear was the clattering of forks against plates, playing the symphony of a mended family.
If only that were the case.
Perhaps, thatâs what a stranger would see if they took a glimpse into his life- a son dining with his loving parents. All he saw was the faded and tainted remains of a sister and mother he could have had and he felt sick at his line of thought.
That wasnât his life nor his relationship to intervene in. He didnât blame his father for feeling lonely. How could he when it was something he too experienced? Yet, he had hoped that the journey of loneliness was something they could both mutually share- their common ground, if it were. Maybe, thatâs what had upset him more than someone trying to replace his mother. The fact that he was, as of this morning, well and truly alone.
He didnât blame his father. He blamed it- Love.
Love was ruthless and unmerciful, he knew that. It was when it had made his sister turn her back on her family; when Avalon had an affair behind Aaronâs back and- now- when it had snatched his father away from him. Come to think of it, those things he could tolerate love taking. He was strong; he could survive it all. He couldnât- however- stand to think of the most important possession that love had snatched from him.
He shook his head slightly in a bid to clear the dark thoughts away, but they clung to him like a forlorn shadow, mirroring his movements in ugly twisted ways. He had never let his mind dwell into it this much, for fear it would grab and drown him, but he couldnât help it. Dropping the towel into the laundry basket, he made way his way into the bedroom and it was only when his cold gaze met the picture frame on his bedside table, did he creak the dark door of thought open, allowing the demons an unceremonious entrance.
It hit him then; hit him hard. The picture was one that was so eerily familiar yet so distant. She was a stranger to him; he had never known her- how she smelt; smiled or laughed. It was foreign. When he had been younger, he had conjured up a laugh, smile and smell for her and he had almost believed that he was close to her. It had made him miss her terribly. Only now, when he was grown, did he realize that the picture could not possibly mean anything to him, even if he wanted it to and- so- the memories of missing her in his youth had become nothing but a dull ache of yearning. He scoffed internally- Love had taken her; snatched her right out of his hands.
For, if she didnât love him, she wouldnât have chosen to save his life over hers, when he was born.
He had never mentioned it to anyone before, and even voiced out in his head, it felt like a sin. A secret that could and would never leave him. He would have sunk deeper, had the âpingâ of a phone notification not gone off, and he sighed in relief at the sound, walking over to where it rested on the bed.
Text from Savannah
He smiled at this, but only slightly, before lifting his phone and typing in a response. He was not one for waiting for a while to respond. What was the point of waiting, if he had clearly seen her message? If she thought him too forward for it then so be it.
They were to meet in 2 days to go out to watch a movie together, something that Justin was not accustomed to. He had watched movies, yes, but more for the sake of it, never as a recreational activity. In hindsight, there was not much that Justin deemed as recreational, so he had let her choose. A good idea on his part, as she became giddy at the thought of a particular movie she had been wanting to watch since its release.
The thought of her happiness brought his mind to Alexis- the wallflower beauty that Aaron pined over. If it was not for her, then he wouldnât be seeing Savannah now. It was her who had chosen to help him in getting to know Savannah, regardless of his cold behavior towards her.
He hadnât meant to be cold, it wasnât his intention. He had just been cautious; skeptical about letting someone in, especially for Aaron after Avalon. If it was- indeed- his fault that Aaron was cheated on then he was going to make sure that it didnât happen again. It was the least he could do.
Yet, try as he might to picture Alexis as the antagonist, he couldnât. He couldnât believe her capable of doing so and that made him doubt his own thoughts. He had refused to believe it when Avalon would repeatedly make excuses and come home late. He did not think her capable either.
He had thought he had known her; she was his friend from birth, after all. If he hadnât known her then he wondered who did. Before meeting Aaron and Danny, she had been his most close companion. With those electric green eyes and lustrous blonde hair, she had always emanated the image of the damsel in distress- the heroine. Little did he know that was the last thing she would turn out to be.
Perhaps, he shouldnât use Alexisâ appearance as a way to convince himself that she would be good for Aaron. Those glimmering doe eyes that exuded innocence along with that small nose that scrunched up when she was annoyed. It was no secret that she was beautiful. Quiet and withdrawn, yes, but still beautiful. And, those very looks could, just as Avalonâs, be equally as deceptive.
He tutted to himself upon the callous comparison; she was nothing like Avalon. He had watched her cautiously throughout his days with her and one thing he had established, early on, was that she was nothing like Avalon. For one, she made an effort with conversation. Avalon had always said one thing that echoed with him- âIf they want you or care for you, they will come to youâ. Only this did not apply to her. She would only speak when spoken to or come when called. Upon meeting with Alexis, she had tried her hardest to converse with him, along with helping him with his love life, despite him having rebuffed her advances several times.
There was that as well as the fact that Alexis did not seem to stand for Aaronâs joke and gave it back twice as bad as she took. He had watched and even smiled slightly when Alexis would respond to Aaronâs insulting jokes with something more insulting. She hadnât cared to look demure or coy, just herself.
Again, he berated himself for even judging someone before even getting to know them. Many a time, people would judge him, Aaron and Danny and believed they knew how they were, merely on the basis of their appearances. They hadnât known them and would judge them and that was what he was doing now, with Alexis, without even getting to know her.
So, he decided that is what he was going to do.
He knew her address from when he and Aaron had driven past and Aaron had pointed it out. And, he was not one to put off what he could do today for tomorrow. It was futile to waste time. He grabbed his hoodie before pocketing his phone and made his way outside, with not even a goodbye spared to his father. Only when he felt the glaring sun against his skin did he decide to forgo the jacket, leaving him in his black v-neck shirt and jeans. Putting his headphones in his ears, he leisurely walked his way to his destination.
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It took him a quick 24 minutes to walk the 2 mile destination. Her house was far, but Justin hadnât even broken a sweat. He was thankful now that he chose to leave the hoodie behind. He walked up the front garden, quietly admiring the hand-planted flowers that were strewn across the yard. Looking up to the door, he frowned when he saw it slightly ajar.
And, if that was strange then the sound of frantic screams from inside the house was all the more peculiar. He couldnât help but listen in as he slowly edged closer to the door.
âNo, I canât!â He heard the familiar scream of Alexisâ voice and it took everything in him to not burst in the house to come to her aid. It was then he fully realised how much Alexis had grown on him.
The sound of rushed footsteps interrupted his thoughts and he listened to the sound of what seemed like an older woman which he chalked down to be Alexisâ mother.
âPlease honey,â he heard her whisper, âjust go to the doctor once. I know you donât want it, but for me. Please. Your health is getting worse by the minute, I can see it. If you keep going like this, your illness will just become worse.â
The words caused his stance to go rigid and he slowly creaked the door open to see Alexis crouching down meekly, tears streaming out of her eyes. An older woman stood by her left, holding a cup of water, also crying.
Alexis let out a deep sigh, thankfully not noticing the boy who stood half in the house and half out. He watched with concern and trepidation as she attempted to stand up, but failed miserably with her legs giving out beneath her. He couldnât help but edge in closer to the house suddenly when she fell roughly to the hard floor. The words left his mouth before he could process them.
âWhat illness?â
Both women turned to look at Justin, fear and shock on their face, their mouths agape. They looked scared that someone had now found out about their secret. Yet, nothing could compare to the fear that Justin felt when he looked down at the girl he had begun to care for.
For, he had predicted right. She would turn out to break Aaronâs heart as Avalon did. Just not in the way he had expected.
And, for the first time ever, he hated that he was always right.
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I nodded, deciding it be best to rip the band aid off as fast as I could.
"Severe aplastic anaemia. I was diagnosed at 13." I said, shrugging indifferently, but inside I was in turmoil. I was afraid of his reaction.
The look of shock on Aaron's face seemed unextinguishable. I didn't know what he was thinking at that exact moment, although I wish I did.
The look of shock, however, vanished hurriedly into thin air and was soon replaced by a look of anger. Aaron moved closer to me sharply, rubbing a hand through his hair. Before I could question his behaviour, he spoke.
"Don't joke about your life like that, Lexi, I don't like it." He breathed, looking me in the eyes. I had to compose myself from melting from the close proximity.
I sighed, looking into Aaron's eyes and, with one long look, he knew I wasn't joking. He stumbled back, looking around frantically. I moved closer, trying to calm him, but he pushed me away.
"You're lying." He muttered, more to himself than me and I couldn't help the tear that ran down my cheek.
* Aaron's POV when he found out about Lexi's illness
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S. A. A