Chapter 35

“You don’t want to try?” Clara said, gesturing at their basket of food.

It was the next evening, and they were sitting together just outside Clara’s little home. The tree’s large canopy arched overhead. Stars twinkled between the branches. Leaves covered the ground.

Lilitha grimaced and shook her head. “I want to but I can’t.”

“You look better, though. Not so sick.”

Lilitha touched her cheek with a wince as she thought of the cave, the blood, Damon beside her. “I’m not surprised.”

“And you’re still not going to tell me…”

Lilitha shook her head. She hadn’t been near anyone in the clan for the last two nights, though she could sense them close, watching. It was hard. It actually ~hurt~. It hurt her heart in a way she didn’t expect. They were the only family she’d ever had. ~Family~. They couldn’t be her ~family~. She looked away with a grimace as she thought about all those trapped men. Of Laymond.

~I ate Laymond.~

Lilitha dropped her head between her knees with a moan. The branches above creaked and rustled in a sudden strong wind. Lilitha tilted her nose. She wiped her mouth. He was coming.

“You must go back inside, Clara.”

“Huh? Why?”

“Just trust me. It's not safe.”

Clara narrowed her eyes. “Damon? Or one of these others?”

“Clara, just go. Now!”

Clara hid herself away. Lilitha turned her face. “Go away, Damon.”

“This is getting ridiculous, Lilitha,” Damon said as he stepped from the trees. He wore his hood far over his face, the way he used to when they’d first met. “You must come with me. You don’t belong here.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.”

“You are not helping yourself doing this.”

“I don’t want to talk about this now.” She indicated Clara’s tree.

“Then we can walk and talk.”

“We’ve spoken enough.”

He lowered his head. A growl vibrated deep within his throat.

“Not here, Damon!”

He was so fast he was a blur. Suddenly he was towering over her and yanking her to her feet.

“Let her go!” came Clara’s scream.

They both turned.

“Clara, stop!” Lilitha cried.

Clara scrambled into the open, raced over, and shoved him. He jerked away like she was something repulsive. It made Lilitha sick.

“You dare touch me, little beast! You’re lucky I don’t slaughter you!”

Clara shoved him again.

“Clara!” Lilitha cried, yanking her back.

The two faced each other off: Damon’s big hulking figure; Clara fierce and glowering.

“Enough of this,” Damon hissed and he reached for his hood.

“Don’t you dare,” Lilitha snarled. Now it was Lilitha growling. ~Actually~ growling. Clara looked at her with a start. “You touch her and this is over.”

He stared at her for a long moment. Then he roared and it was like an explosion. Clara jumped. Lilitha bundled her back. Then he turned and charged away, disappearing into the trees, roars splitting the night.

Lilitha sagged in relief, then turned to her friend. Clara had taken a couple of steps back. She was so pale she was almost white, blue eyes bright with fear.

“What’s going on?” Clara said in a small voice. Raising a shaking hand, she pointed an accusing finger at Lilitha. “You—you and him.”

Lilitha’s heart dove. “Clara.” She took a step toward her but Clara backed away. “Don’t look at me like that.” Clara was staring at her like she couldn’t believe her eyes. Like she was starting to understand. Lilitha’s heart dove again. “C-Clara, please. You’ve all I got.”

“Y-You’re not going to help me, are you? You and him. You and ~them~.” She clutched at her chest. “You were always different.”

“I ~am~ helping you. I ~will~ help you. ~Clara~…”

Shaking her head, Clara backed up several steps. “Just-just stay away.” Then she scrambled beneath the tree.

Lilitha stood frozen for several long moments, feeling strangely numb. Turning away, she walked into the trees. She felt like she should cry or be angry but she felt nothing. She felt hollow. Empty. Tired. Briefly, her thoughts drifted back to the cliff.

***

Lilitha didn’t know how long she walked for. She wasn’t paying attention to which direction she was moving either. It was only when she heard noises that she realized she’d been following his scent without realizing it.

She stopped to listen. He was groaning, like he was in pain. There came another long groan, followed by a cry. Her heart started to race.

“Damon?” she called.

What if he was injured? She hurried ahead, moving smoothly and swiftly between the trees. His noises were getting louder. Then he laughed. Lilitha slowed, then stopped. Her heart flipped over. He wasn’t in pain at all—and he wasn’t alone.

Heat rushed up her neck. ~Carmella~.

Keeping low to the ground, she crept along. They were loud now, not even trying to keep quiet. She parted the leaves—and froze.

It wasn’t Carmella at all.

Silus was kneeling on all fours, naked, copper beard damp with sweat, beads of sweat glittering upon his chest. Behind him, Damon was thrusting into him furiously, skin flushed, eyes narrowed, horns gleaming against the moonlight.

Lilitha couldn’t move. Damon was angry, frenzied. Her father’s eyes were closed, forearms bulging with veins as he clawed his hands hard into the earth. Then he pulled himself upright and Lilitha looked away before she could see ~everything~.

She staggered away, stopping to bend low over her knees. Then she fell into a squat, unable to catch her breath. The blood was throbbing in her temples. Her heart was galloping. Cold sweat gathered around her neck. The two started getting louder and with a grimace Lilitha ran away.

First Damon, then Clara, now this. It was too much. What was ~wrong~ with these people? What was wrong with these ~monsters~?

In her shock, it seemed like she was tripping over every little rock and root in her way. The branches ripped through her hair, they clawed at her cloak, tormenting her like the whole damn forest. Her father. Her ~father~.

“Get off me. Get off me!”

Then she was growling—and this time she didn’t stop herself. It felt good in her throat. It felt good to purge the rage and the grief and the helplessness. It was not as though there was Clara to worry about hearing it. Though maybe the others could—and did.

She tripped again, this time falling hard to her knees.

“Hush,” came a whisper.

“Leave me alone. Go away. I hate you all.”

“What’s happened?” Carmella dropped to her knees beside her.

“You were right. I know nothing.”

“I’m so sorry.”

Lilitha glared. “Are you?”

Carmella’s hair was loose again, falling around her in long heavy braids. She looked more beautiful than Lilitha had ever seen her.

“You don’t hate us,” Carmella said.

“I have to. I’m supposed to. I do!”

She started to babble, and it all came out of her in a flood: her love for Damon, her fears for Clara, her confusion over Mateus, her terrors of becoming a monster.

Lilitha hardly noticed that Carmella had pulled her into her arms and was holding her. She hardly noticed the warm tears streaming down her cheeks. It felt good though. She needed it.

Carmella was stroking her hair. “Shhhh, everything’s going to be fine. You’ll see.” She stroked and stroked her hair until the sobbing settled and Lilitha slumped against her, her face pressed into her warm throat.

Carmella gently pushed her away. “Hush now.”

Disentangling herself, the Diablon stood, wrapping her cloak around herself.

“You’re—you’re going?” Lilitha said.

“Be calm, Lilitha. I’ll be back.” And just like that she left, boots thudding lightly against the ground.

Lilitha stared after her in disbelief. She’d never felt so betrayed and alone in all her life. So much for her so-called family. The cold air snatched at her tears. It clawed at her hair. She dropped her head into her hands. Clara was gone too. Now she had no one.

Her ears pricked at the sound of movement. Someone sat heavily beside her.

“Thank you,” Lilitha said as Carmella pulled her into her embrace again.

Lilitha relaxed, eyes closed as the tears continued to roll. She pressed her face into her shoulder with a sigh. Carmella was rubbing her back in long, slow strokes that made her shiver. Lilitha could feel her heart beating against hers. Turning her face, she pressed her nose into the side of her neck.

Lilitha froze. Her eyes snapped open.

How the hell had she not realized? His smell was unmistakable. The way he felt was nothing like Carmella. Nothing like a woman at all. Quickly, her senses caught up. His arms were way too big, way too firm. His hands were huge. But his smell—~that~ smell.

She jerked back. “You!”