Chapter 64

Everything had turned back to a fog. Nothing seemed real.

The rain was pattering in her eyes. The pounding of Damon’s racing footsteps thundered through her body. Squinting, Lilitha looked up into his hooded face.

“I missed you,” she murmured, but he didn’t hear.

Nobody stopped them—the storm was a godsend. But they were still in danger. Even now, Mandalay would be trying to rustle up help. What if it put the clan in peril?

“You shouldn’t have come,” she said again.

He looked down at her, then away. He began to slow.

“Put me down,” she said. “I can manage.”

He took her wrist, keeping her close. They part walked, part hobbled the rest of the way. It seemed to take forever, but soon the buildings became smaller and more widespread. There were shacks. Then farms. The road was a dirt track.

Lilitha was doing her best to bite back the pain, but each step became more and more staggering. The rain was slowing, now a sprinkle rather than a downpour. She kept looking over her shoulder, but nobody was following. When she stumbled and almost fell, Damon hoisted her into his arms again.

And then she saw it—the forest. The trees. Home. The smells! She could have cried. Then other familiar smells—Mateus, Silus, Carmella, all intermingled. Blood. The smell of her clan.

Then they were amid the trees. Damon put her down again. The breaths were catching in her chest. Stitches stabbed her sides. Leaves brushed at her cloak and hair, scents gusted in her face. The air whispered in her ears. Her heart was racing. It felt like it was going to explode with joy.

Then came a familiar roar that almost broke it. “Lilitha!”

Trees and bushes shook and bent, branches snapped and cracked, the forest floor rumbled as something huge came charging.

Mateus caught her up in his arms, lifting her right off the ground. Lilitha wrapped her legs around his hips as she held him tightly back, his hot, panting breaths beating against the nape of her neck.

“Dammit, Lilitha. You’re alive!”

He crushed her to his chest, and she squeezed him so hard it hurt her arms. Then he was kissing her all over the neck, all over the face. Lilitha grinned tearfully, clawing her fingers in his hair as she kissed him back. He was slippery from the wet. He was warm. He was wonderful. He was heaven.

Then Damon cleared his throat. Lilitha hadn’t realized her eyes were closed until she snapped them open. She met Mateus’s soft dark gaze. “You forgive me?” she choked.

He pressed his forehead to hers, horns straddling her head.

Their chests rose and fell together. He was wearing his cloak, but it was wide open, hood fallen back. Then she noticed Silus and Carmella. She wriggled against Mateus, and he lowered her to the ground.

Before she could approach the others, Mateus grabbed her arm. “Are you okay?”

“No, she’s not okay,” Damon said.

“Come on, we’d better go,” Silus said warily, looking past them toward Mainstry. His beard and hair were wet. His eyes met Lilitha’s, and his smile flooded her chest with warmth.

Mateus tried to take her hand, but Lilitha slipped through his grasp and went over to her father. He grabbed her face, studying her like he couldn’t believe she was here. His eyes filled with tears. And suddenly she was in his arms.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“I’m sorry too.” A drop of rain rolled down his nose. Or was it a tear? It dripped into his beard. “But you’re home now.”

He touched her cheek, then turned, wiping his face as he walked on ahead. Carmella had already disappeared into the trees.

“Can you walk?” Damon said.

“Why can’t she walk?” Mateus said.

Mateus took her wrist. Damon pushed her gently in the back. It was only a slight slope, but it was difficult, and soon she was hobbling again. Mateus was watching her with concern.

Thankfully, it wasn’t too long before they all stopped. The rain had ceased, though water was dripping from the leaves. Lilitha crouched beside a puddle to drink, Damon standing behind her. Her knees gave way, but Damon caught her before she could land on her bottom. He eased her to the ground, propping her up against a tree.

Crouching beside her, he pressed his hand to her forehead. “You’re pale and weak. When was the last time you ate?”

Gasping, Lilitha just shook her head.

Silus disappeared into the trees. Mateus was watchful. Carmella was quiet, face hidden within her hood. Lilitha felt her glare like a burn against her face. Mateus removed his cloak and hung it from a tree.

Lilitha grabbed onto Damon’s arm. “Hold me.”

Dropping down beside her, he pulled her into his embrace. Lilitha rested her chin upon his shoulder with a sigh. His heart was beating against hers. His breath was warm upon her cheek. She pressed her lips into his throat. It was salty. Then she was kissing him on the mouth. He licked the tears from her lips.

“I’m sorry,” she said for what felt like the hundredth time.

He pulled her more tightly into his arms, rubbing her back. They both looked over at the sound of Silus’s return. His cloak was off. He looked like he’d been running, red-faced and panting.

Lilitha’s mouth burst with saliva at the smell. He handed over the leaf-wrapped flesh he was holding in the crook of his arm.

Lilitha opened it up and ate without thinking. Even as the others watched on silently. Even as she felt the tension. She ate every last bite without fear or regret. Feeling nothing but her hunger, then that wonderful full feeling in her belly. Every bite felt like she was coming back to life again.

She sucked her fingers, licked down her palms. She even sucked away some of the blood soaking the cuffs of her cloak.

By the time she was done, she took off her cloak, suddenly feeling so hot she was gasping. Damon rested his hand upon her back as she leaned over her lap with a groan, hands clawed into the wet earth.

“Thank you,” she said.

“Come to your senses now?” Carmella snapped.

Lilitha looked up. The female Diablon stood, hood pulled low over her face. “Come to your ~fucking~ senses?”

Carmella wiped at her face, then turned into the trees. She disappeared from sight, but her tail was cracking loudly, over and over again until Lilitha’s ears rang. Silus got up and went after her.

“I didn’t think she’d be the one to be so upset,” Lilitha said. She looked at Damon and Mateus with a questioning gaze.

Mateus was looking away. Damon’s jade eyes were dark. “We found your blood.”

“My blood?” Lilitha frowned in confusion.

“By the tree.”

It was several heartbeats before she remembered. ~“Oh.”~ It seemed so long ago now. So long ago she’d forgotten. It was like a punch in the gut.

Lilitha felt the blood drain from her face. Her throat turned thick with tears. How ~could~ she have forgotten?

She tried to control her emotions, but they seemed to lift her up and roll her over like a wave. Suddenly, she was crying, then sobbing. It wasn’t just about the miscarriage—which was awful—but about everything. So much had happened in only a few weeks. Had it been only a few weeks? It felt like a lifetime!

She looked up as Mateus turned and disappeared into the trees. Damon stayed, his hand upon her thigh.

Through her blurry eyes, Lilitha looked down at her bloodied hands in despair.