Chapter 11

It was a massacre. No, it was more than that—it was an annihilation.

Once they moved past the fallen trees, broken branches, and upturned earth, Lilitha found herself wading through mud that was thick with blood.

Each step closer to the epicenter revealed more horror, more destruction. Bodies were strewn everywhere, and body parts were even more abundant.

They were scattered on the ground, torn and mangled, and even hanging from the trees.

Lilitha looked up, puzzled by the sensation of rain on a sunny day. She couldn’t figure out where it was coming from.

~What the hell happened here?~

“Do we—do we just leave them all here?” Lilitha asked, her voice shaky.

“We’ll take what we can,” Silus replied. “We must. It’s all we’ve got. Without a delivery, we have no stock.”

Lilitha bit her lip, realizing that this meant Damon and Mateus would have to hunt again soon.

She squeezed Damon’s hand, guilt washing over her. “I’m sorry. It’s because of me. With that knight. He told them and they came out to destroy us.”

Damon looked at her but didn’t respond.

“I find that unlikely,” Silus said. “They’ve always known we’ve been out here.”

“Yes, but never in the city.” She paused. “I killed and ate there. They would have known.”

Mandalay knew and might have told them. “And you—” she looked up at Damon “—you were there.”

“It’s happened before, Lilitha,” Mateus said. “And it will happen again. Whether or not you are to blame”—he shrugged—“they always need reminding.”

“Mistakes were made,” Damon said quietly. “Get over it and just don’t do it again.”

Lilitha stopped in front of a man lying on his side, his arm twisted at an unnatural angle.

When she turned him over, she recoiled. His intestines spilled out like slippery snakes.

Mateus gripped her shoulder.

“They attacked us,” Carmella said. “We had no choice.”

“I know,” Lilitha snapped. “For God’s sake, give me a chance to cope.”

Mateus crouched down and hoisted the body over his shoulder with a sickening squelch. Bits fell to the ground.

Blood gushed down the backs of his legs as the man’s belly emptied out. “All right. I’ll take this one up. Carmella, you can come with me.”

Lilitha watched them leave. Damon kept her close to his side as they continued scouring for the living, Silus keeping a wary eye out from behind.

They eventually found one, coughing and spluttering as he sat up against a tree. His eyes widened, and he lurched over to the side as he tried to get away, but his legs weren’t working.

His arms were all twisted up in a way that wasn’t natural.

He was young. Too young. And he looked oddly familiar, but it was hard to tell why with how hellish he looked.

Then she realized—it was the Champion from Mainstry. The man on the gray horse who had taken her to Mandalay. He’d helped her. He’d been nice.

A muscle pulled in Lilitha’s chest, and she suddenly burst into tears.

“Get her away,” Damon said.

Silus slid an arm around her waist. “Come on, Lilitha. Let’s go.”

“But keep close!” Damon called.

He took her through the trees. Silus laid his hand upon her back as she braced herself up against a trunk.

Lilitha jerked at the sound of a gurgling cry as Damon finished the job.

“It’s all my fault,” she croaked.

There soon came the heavy crunch of Damon’s footsteps. “You done?”

Lilitha whirled around with a snarl. “Shut up!”

Damon sneered at her. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“A lot of humans died needlessly,” he said quietly.

“Like you care!”

“I care about my food. I care about our survival!”

“What do you want me to do? Go back in time to fix it? Are you going to blame me forever, Damon?”

Rage-filled tears dripped down her cheeks. Her hands were clawed at her sides.

“I’ll stop blaming you when you act like one of us.”

“I am one of you! I’ve only been a few months a Diablon. I’ve been a human my whole life!”

His eyes caught alight. “You were never a human.”

“You don’t understand. You won’t ever understand. You won’t care to understand. You’re as stubborn as a—as a fucking bull, and I’m sick of it!”

“I’m sick of it too. I’m sick of your nonsense.”

“Enough, Damon!” Silus snapped.

Lilitha bared her teeth. “Fine. You’re so sick of me you can go fuck yourself. You can all go fuck yourselves.”

She turned on her father and something softened in her heart. He was looking tired and sad. Lilitha set her jaw. “I’m going.”

“Lilitha, see reason.” Silus tried to seize her wrist, but she flung her arm out of reach.

“You believe the same, don’t you? That I’m just full of nonsense.”

“I believe no such thing,” he said.

But she could see the doubt in his eyes. Shaking her head, she turned to walk away.

“Where are you going?” Damon said.

“Away from you!” she roared back over her shoulder as she bashed her way through the trees.

“You can’t go. It’s not safe!”

“I don’t care!”

Damon rushed over with a snarl, seizing her arm. Lilitha tried to wrench away but his grip was unbelievably powerful.

“Damon, just let her go,” Silus said.

“Shut it!”

Lilitha thrashed and squirmed, sounding more and more like an animal as she growled and snarled and shrieked.

The forest was a blur against her tears. Finally, Damon pulled her up against him, tightly enough that her arms were pinned.

“Calm down,” he hissed in her ear as she continued to struggle. “Calm down.”

“You fucking calm down! Let me GO! What are you going to do? Hold me like this forever?”

“Until you calm down.”

Silus wasn’t helping her. Nobody was helping her. They were all on Damon’s side. They all blamed her. They still blamed her.

Damon’s skin was burning hot. His breaths were deep and heavy. She could smell him intensely. He seemed to infuse every one of her pores—and it made her even madder.

“I really hate you right now,” she growled. “I wish—I wish I never met you. I wish this child was fucking human.”

Lilitha’s balance faltered as he abruptly let her go. She caught a glimpse of his shocked expression before she spun around and darted into the forest.

The trees blurred around her as she sprinted, putting as much distance as she could between herself and Damon, between herself and all of them. There were no humans around.

No immediate danger.

But it didn’t matter. All she felt was a whirlwind of anger, sorrow, and guilt.

It was all she knew.

First, there was the look the Champion had given her. It was as if he knew her.

As if he recognized her.

She knew she was being irrational. She knew her memory and fears were distorting the truth.

But it felt so real.

Then there was the look on Damon’s face. She hadn’t meant what she’d said.

But he deserved it.

~He deserves it!~

She didn’t know how long she ran before she finally stopped, panting heavily, barely able to catch her breath. She collapsed onto the ground, gazing up at the canopy.

The sun was peeking through the leaves.

She closed her eyes, resting her hands on her stomach.

“I didn’t mean it,” she whispered, a tear trickling down her cheek. “I didn’t mean it.”

She must have dozed off because when she woke up, it was dark. Lilitha stared up at the branches, feeling irritated.

“Leave me alone,” she muttered.

“I can’t leave you alone.”

Lilitha sat up with a groan. Why did she feel so sore?

Everything seemed to ache.

She looked down at her arms in surprise. They were covered in scratches.

Her entire body was covered in scratches, cuts, and bruises.

Lilitha looked up as Mateus emerged from the trees. He had bathed since the attack—he looked clean and fresh.

As if he hadn’t just ruthlessly killed a bunch of people without feeling a shred of guilt.

Lilitha averted her gaze as he sat down next to her.

She wiped her eyes. “I’m trying, you know. I’m really trying.”

“I know. What can I do to make you feel better?”

“Nothing.”

Then she smiled. “Punch Damon in the face.”

Mateus threw his head back, his horns gleaming, as he roared with laughter. “Done!”

Lilitha grinned at him as he grinned back at her. Then she frowned, pointing at his shoulder.

“You’re hurt.”

He twisted his arm to look. “Just a nick.”

“Looks much deeper than that.”

“It’ll mostly heal by tomorrow.”

Then he looked her over. “What about you?” He ran his hand over her scratched arm.

“Nothing. Probably from the branches.”

She continued to frown at his wound. “You could have died.”

“But I didn’t.”

Lilitha sniffed.

“Don’t be sad,” he flashed his pointed teeth. “I want to see you smile.”

Lilitha tried but it fell away.

“Smile for me!”

And Lilitha shrieked as he pulled her to the ground. She grabbed at his horns as she struggled to get up, but he kept her pinned, lifting up her tunic so he could bury his face into her breasts.

Lilitha burst into laughter. “Stop it!” she snorted. “Stop it! You’re not going to make me feel better!”

But he kept rubbing his face into her, his tongue flicking her nipples. Then he began kissing down her abdomen.

She clapped a hand to her mouth, gasping for breath as he poked his tongue into her bellybutton.

She tried to buck him away, but he pinned down her hips.

He smoothed his hand over her slightly swollen abdomen.

“When you laugh our baby laughs, so Carmella tells me,” he said, and he leaned over and blew against her like he would a baby.

Like he was doing against a baby. ~Their~ baby.

Lilitha wrapped her arms around her face, choking on her laughter. Then he stopped and everything went quiet and still as he stroked her.

Lilitha unwrapped her arms to see him looking down at her in awe. He leaned over to kiss her breasts, then continued with his stroking.

He laid his hand on her pelvis, so warm and large. His tail was swaying gently.

“What’s going to happen when we have this baby?” Lilitha said. “How are things going to change?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never had a baby before.”

“But you’ve been a baby. How was it growing up?”

Mateus grinned. “The best time. Well, the second-best time now.”

The look he gave her made her heart melt. “I can’t wait to be a father.”

“You’re going to make the ~best~ father.”

She smiled at him, and he smiled back.