Chapter Four

"What's wrong with you, huh?" Liam asked, kicking Louis in the shin. "You're pretty moody for a guy who's winning at Mario Kart."

"Harry hasn't talked to me in a week," Louis sighed.

"Oh no." Liam said, his eyes wide. "What a tragedy that the guy you're supposed to stay away from is doing all the work for you and making your life easier."

"No, it's not like that," Louis said defensively.

"Should I break out the ice cream so we can talk about our feelings?" Liam asked.

"Fuck off, Payne," Louis said. "I'm being serious."

Liam sighed, and turned to face Louis, his brown eyes watching Louis intently, pausing the game when he could sense Louis' shift in tone. "Okay, talk to me then."

"Well the first night the first years moved in, he came to my room at, like, four in the morning." Louis started.

Liam raised his eyebrows but didn't interrupt.

"And he was having trouble breathing, it was a really bad panic attack... he was crying and he just wanted someone to hold him and talk to him, so I did," Louis said while Liam listened quietly. "And he opened up to me a lot, and he was just so close to me and then I sent him back to his room and he seemed fine but he hasn't talked to me since. He just says hi when I bump into him in the halls." Louis thought about the past week and how many times Harry had awkwardly shuffled past him in the halls, barely making eye contact with Louis as he left for class.

"I think," Liam said, weighing his words carefully, "I think sometimes when people have panic attacks they tell you more than they would if they would have normally told you... you know? Like he probably wouldn't have opened up to you so much on the first day if he wasn't panicking. You were basically a stranger and now he probably feels awkward about telling you so much."

"So now that he's back to feeling he's embarrassed about telling me everything?" Louis asked.

"That's my best guess," Liam said.

"Then what am I supposed to... urghh," Louis groaned. "I hate my life, can we trade?"

"Nope," Liam said, grabbing for the bowl of chips. "I don't care how much you're getting paid, I'd literally never move back to a dorm room. I mean, public showers," he shuddered. "I like being able to do laundry without having coins on me and shower without sandals on."

"I just want to talk to him again, I don't want things to be awkward forever." Louis sighed.

"Why don't you ask him to the open mic tomorrow?" Liam asked.

"Do you think he'd go?" Louis asked.

"Probably," Liam said, "I mean, you might not get him onstage but at least he'd probably be down to listen. You still up for playing 'How to Save a Life' with me?" he asked, restarting the game.

"Yup," Louis said, grabbing a handful of chips. Even as he demolished Liam in Mario Kart, all he could think about was the green eyed boy down the hall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oops," Harry said, bumping into Louis in the hallway. He had a small stack of textbooks in his arms.

"Hi," Louis said, smiling nervously. "Where are you headed?" Saturday afternoon was a strange time to be wandering around campus with books when it was only the first month of school.

"I wanted to get some of my readings done for the week," Harry said, sucking on his lip piercing.

"Oh, that's a good idea," Louis said. "Um, so there's this thing on tonight at Hal's-"

"The cafe in Anderson Building?" Harry asked, his nose scrunched up a little as he tried to remember.

"Yeah," Louis nodded, smiling. "They're having an open mic tonight. You play guitar, right? You should come."

"Um," Harry said. "Yeah, yeah, maybe. I just was going to read maybe one chapter first-" he was avoiding making eye contact with Lou.

"We can study together!" Louis suggested. "We can study and then go?" Don't oversell it, Tomlinson, he thought to himself. He knew he shouldn't be pushing Harry so much, but God, he just needed to make sure he was okay. "You promised you'd let me drag you out to a few of these things, remember?" he smiled.

"Okay," Harry said hesitantly, and headed in the direction of Lou's room.

"Oh are we-?"

"What?" Harry asked, sucking on his lip ring again.

"I thought you'd rather study in the library," Louis said.

"We can, I'm sorry I just thought-"

"No, it's okay!" Louis said, "My room's just a bit of a disaster zone," he laughed.

Louis fumbled with his key as he opened the door. He didn't know why everything felt so forced between him and Harry.

Harry relaxed as soon as Louis opened the door. He accidentally let out a loud laugh and covered his mouth with his hand, blushing afterward.

Louis glared, his blue eyes narrowing.

"You're still living out of boxes?" Harry asked, his eyes practically watering with laughter. "Lou, it's been almost two weeks."

Louis tried not to laugh but he couldn't help it.

He cleared off the papers from his desk into a tall stack while Harry walked over to the window to open the blinds and pried the window open a bit. He quickly smoothed out Louis' comforter, trying to be subtle about it.

"Are you making my bed?" Louis asked.

"No," Harry lied, fluffing up the pillows.

"Neat freak," Louis smirked, sitting down at his desk.

"Hoarder," Harry retaliated. His eyes flitted over to Lou's dresser. "How long has that pizza box been there?"

Louis uncapped a pen with his teeth and opened his notebook. "I'm sorry, are we here because a certain overachiever wanted to study on a Saturday, or are we here to clean my dorm room?" He tried to be serious, but his lips turned up in a smile, his eyebrows raising like they did when he was trying not to smile.

"Sorry," Harry said, his cherry lips smiling, as he settled into Louis' bed. The cramped dorm was laid out so that Louis' bed was tucked into the far corner with the window, his desk pressed the exposed side of his bed, forming an L shape that allowed Harry to sit on Lou's bed and still be able to use the edge of his desk. Harry spread out his coloured highlighters and opened his Intro to Psychology textbook.

Louis looked up from his notebook. "I took that in first year!"

"Did you?" Harry asked, his green eyes bright. The late afternoon sun was spilling into the room, casting a soft glow on the younger boy.

"Well," Louis laughed. "Practically everyone takes psychology in first year. Psychology and German were really popular electives when I was a first year."

"Yeah," Harry said, nodding. "Like half the people on my floor are taking those."

"You're getting along with everyone here then?" Louis asked, tapping his pen against his notebook.

"Mhm," Harry nodded noncommittally, uncapping his pink highlighter and marking out a passage. "So... any groundbreaking tips for first year psych?"

"Yeah, actually," Louis said, turning his attention to Harry. "Can I have a look?" he asked, motioning to Harry's textbook.

Harry handed it over, and Louis rummaged through a stack of papers on his desk, pulling out a pair of glasses with thick black rectangle frames.

"You wear reading glasses?" Harry asked.

Louis sighed as he pushed them up his nose. "I know, I know. No need to poke fun."

"No," Harry said. "I think they're cute." He pulled out his phone, which was buzzing in his pocket and slid to ignore the call.

"You can take that," Louis said.

"Not important," Harry mumbled, putting his phone back in his pocket. Louis was amazed anything could fit in those tight jeans.

"Anyway," Louis said, flipping through Harry's textbook. "From what I remember... these two chapters are going to be the most important..." he grabbed some sticky notes from a drawer in his desk and marked off the chapters. "Also you'll want to pay attention to the lecture slides and videos, they'll bring stuff up like that in the exam to try and get people to lose marks for not going to class." He handed Harry's book back.

"Thanks," Harry smiled.

The two studied in silence for a while, Louis glancing over every now and again to see Harry's lanky frame bent over his thick textbook, long curls tucked behind his ears, highlighters in a neat row beside him. Louis tried to focus, but Harry was just so... pretty. His lips always looked so delicate, even with the piercing, and his curls were soft, some of them in wave with a few stray ringlets throughout.

A short while later, Louis' phone buzzed with a text. "It's my friend Liam," he said. "He's at the coffeehouse now, are you ready to go?"

"Yup," Harry said, capping his highlighter, and marking his page.

"Just give me a sec," Louis said, "I don't want to go in sweats."

"Um, okay," Harry said, looking out the window awkwardly.

Louis kicked off his sweatpants, stepping into a pair of black jeans with rips in the knees that he grabbed off the floor. He shrugged out of his t-shirt, and rummaged through his dresser until he found the shirt he was looking for. It was a white Stone Roses band tee, with the sleeves cut off.

He grabbed a pack of cigarettes from the top of his dresser, and slipped one in between his lips, pausing to ruffle his hair up a little in front of the dresser mirror before sliding his lighter into his pocket. "You ready to go?" he asked, taking the cigarette out of his mouth.

Harry was staring a little, and he looked down when Louis looked over, coughing a little bit. "Yup, I'm good."

"Kay," Louis smiled, feeling on top of the world as he grabbed his wallet and locked up his dorm, with the green eyed boy shyly following his lead to the cafe.

He could get used to this.