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Chapter 30

chapter 30

Sanyog - A Coincidence

She was expecting a sudden exclamation from me … Instead I uttered … this kulfi is very tasty , it reminds me of the kulfi I used to eat back in my village … do you remember … when you had visited my village we had enjoyed it on the way to the bus stop in the evening … Sanyogita furiously whispered … I am here on very serious topic and you are after kulfi … I said , my mother always said , whatever may happen don’t insult the food in your hand by the anger in your mind … Sanyogita said , do you remember somebody else also agreed with this statement … Yes… I do remember … he was Sumangal … When I was ill , I was in the hostel , he used take care of me and he uttered the same statement as my mother … Ok, at least you remember that … she said… Why … what happened ? I questioned … I thought … she halted… What ? I asked … Nothing … she said … are you not interested in knowing what happened afterwards … she added … If you don’t mind Sanyogita … I am eager to know … but if you don’t wish to tell … I won’t force you… Sanyogita was keenly observing the waves in the blue water reaching  till the horizon … Though , I said to her , I am not interested in knowing her past … but my palpitations increased … I wiped my forehead with the handkerchief … She noticed it … and said … are you nervous … Why … I should be … I stated … Who else will be? She said … You know very well… Sanyogita or do you wish to take in written from me …I said angrily … How many times , I regret … she stated and stopped … Regret for what , Sanyogita … For reading those letters … she said … I was not the type of the girl who was interested in such things … But, age matters , I completed her statement … But you know very well , Sameep, I was not like other girls … she said. I know , Sanyogita … but sometimes its better to forgive ourselves for our past mistakes … I said. I agree Sameep … but when our decisions put at stake lives of many then you can’t , she said. I lost my parents … she said sobbing … Unable to know what to say … I just said , Sorry … Sameep … my father had huge expectations from me … and I did nothing … I am a big failure … she said crying … Sanyogita , I said , control yourself , we can’t rectify the past but we can live better in the present … But my parents won’t return to see it … she was sobbing … Sanyogita … I said … I don’t know how to console you on the contrary I will advise you … She cut my statement saying … its always easy to advice … I added … Sanyogita , you are not the only one who suffered … and suddenly stopped ( I was ashamed of myself for uttering this statement ) I couldn’t gaze at her now … To change the topic , I said , masala pan of this place is very famous , would you like to have one … I will tell Mayank … and without waiting for her confirmation … I stood up and called Mayank … He came , and I said … please bring masala pan for us … he nodded … Sanyogita asked him about his meal … I was relieved she ignored my statement … Again I sat near her on the mat … We sat in silence almost ten minutes till Mayank arrived with the pan … While chewing the pan , she said , after years , I have enjoyed the lunch in the company of nature …thank you for it … Sanyogita … I said loudly … what’s this? … we are good friends … and you thank your friend … this is against the rule of the friendship … She added … hiding from friends is also violation of rules … Same applicable to you , I asserted … Tell me what happened after you read those letters … but I am surprised … at that time you just mentioned once about those letters and afterwards we never discussed about it , I thought who will dare to write letter to you , such a sincere studious girl … you might have fooled me … I said How much I wish … whatever you said should have been true … she said . Sumangal was my room partner but  I never thought he was inclined towards you , I said … Appearances are deceptive , Mr.Sharma … she said in an assertive tone … I agree with you, I said … I was also surprised when I received letters in the name of Sumangal , I also thought somebody might be making fun of me … but one day , when you were in the library and he was teaching me mathematics … he disclosed his feelings for me … I was suddenly confused and shocked by his openness … and I didn’t gave any reply to him … she said … Why didn’t you tell me at that time …I asked I didn’t wish to put any hindrance in your studies … that’s why … she said You should have told me … I repeated … Yes… how much I wished but after our first failure in prelims … you decided to shift to Delhi … So , I didn’t wish to bother you by such petty concerns … she added How did you decide everything on your own? I said angrily … Sameep , she said in a calm manner … I did what I thought was right at that time ... I didn’t think about long term consequences … maybe I was not mature enough … I was from a family which was too much protective and I was not really acquainted with the external world at that time … this is the late knowledge though … It’s never too late , Ma says , I said … Yes , yesterday also , aunty was saying this to me … Sameep … in the afternoon when I was sleeping with her in her bedroom … but Sameep … life has flown us so long now … now I don’t have any courage to face life at all …she said I am surprised , I said , you are speaking this … Sanyogita … whom I have seen as the most staunch and stubborn girl … She replied , that is past now … Sameep and added but I wish my daughter should be like what you said just now … What ! I exclaimed … Dr. Archana Pandit Â

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