Chapter Ninety,
Once He Xuan left, the study turned much quieter, that one could pretty much hear the sound of winding incense dispersing into mist, luring people to sleep. Xiao Zuo rubbed the middle of his brows, and stood up and walked to a bookshelf to the side thinking to find a few books to read, when the windowsill suddenly transmitted with sounds of a bird flapping its wings.
It was a round pigeon. Xiao Zuo took down a paper slip tied to its leg, hesitated for a moment, then closed all the windows tightly, looked at the corridor outside the door, and then walked back to the table and opened it.
The surface was only simply written with five words, âAll has been prepared properly.â
Xiao Zuoâs hand shook, his lips were already ghastly pale, and barely steadied himself all thanks to both his hands propping on the edge of the table. That handwriting clearly was the exact same as Fu Zhan Chuanâs, when he wrote, he would always slightly angle the stroke to the right on the final word.
Soâ¦â¦ so it was like thatâ¦â¦
Turns out He Xuan always knew from the beginning- those delusions, those foolish little actions of his from the start, did he find it very funny? He stood to a side and coldly watched every one of his actions he himself thought was subtle, ha ha ha, heâ¦â¦ was merely a joke in his eyes.
Soâ¦â¦ so when Fu Zhan Chuan just suggested he go to the south, He Xuan also long knew, he even thought He Xuan understood his emotions, the infatuation of him wanting to go back home, he even thought, he even thoughtâ¦â¦
He even thought maybe it was out of that little bit, insignificant bit of likingâ¦â¦
Xiao Zuo spuriously smiled as he took the paper slip in his hand and moved it to the oil lantern. He hung his eyes down as he watched the tongue of the fire swallow it bit by bit, tearing it apart into its stomach, only leaving a sliver of grey ashes, falling onto the pedestal. Xiao Zuo randomly flung it away, and lightly rubbed the remnants of it on his fingers.
Could it be, he also had some hardships too? Could heâ¦â¦ have some reason he could not tell it to him?
Xiao Zuo blankly watched that oil lantern, and immediately actually started finding excuses for He Xuan. If his Father saw it, he would definitely sigh and scold him, butâ¦â¦ but their Xiao family, had very few natural-born kings, yet pretty much every single one of them were deeply affectionate types. That Grandfather of his who cut off his hair to be a monk, did he not do it because his beloved Empress died in pregnancyâ¦â¦
Xiao Zuo absentmindedly thought to some random things, so when He Xuan walked to his side, he did not even perceive it, and got scared into a big jump, âWhenâ¦â¦ when did you come back?â
âWhat happened to you?â He Xuanâs finger stroked past the side of Xiao Zuoâs face, âSo absentminded.â
Xiao Zuo gripped his right hand tight, the flat finger tips could not make him feel a piercing pain, and softly smiled, âFu Zhan Chuan is one of your people.â
He Xuan lifted his eyes, he only lightly knitted his eyebrows, but did not deny it, âYou know now?â
âHah.â Xiao Zuo lightly laughed, he raised his eyebrows, and looked right into He Xuanâs eyes, âIs it very fun playing with me?â
âLi Nuâ¦â¦â He Xuan bent over, Xiao Zuo took one step back with a cold face, and silently looked at him.
He Xuan paused for an instant, He turned his head away like he could not bear it, pursed his lips, then said lowly, âSorry.â In these twenty years, he had never admitted defeat to others, so that this kind of self-vindication to him, was far too unsmooth and seemingly immature. He Xuan paused, like he was thinking of how to phrase it, âAt that time when I had Fu Zhan Chuan get close to you, it certainly was part of my plans, and later on when I saw you were close with him, I never told you, afraid you would be upset as well.â
He Xuan secretly glanced at Xiao Zuo, he had his head down and did not look at him, but the stiffened back slightly loosened up, and He Xuan inconspicuously took back his gaze, with his tone hard to hide its disappointment, âLi Nu, you should trust me some more.â
âTrust you?â Xiao Zuo gripped his right hand, âHow you do make me trust you? Between us, from the very start, was never anyâ¦â¦â
âXiao Zuo.â He Xuan looked at him, with a calm expression, âDidnât you not tell me too?â
Xiao Zuo froze, he slightly anxiously swallowed his saliva, and avoided He Xuanâs gaze, âWhâ¦â¦ what?â
He Xuan hung his eyes down, and said to the door, âHave her come in.â
After a short moment, the door creaked as it was pushed open, Xiao Zuo pursed his lips, glanced over absentmindedly, and immediately stiffened in place like he was frozen there, blankly staring at the incoming person. He had prepared so many words, but at this time, he throat pathetically got blocked , and could not say a single thing.
Xiao You Ci looked to thinned out a lot, so when dressed in this green-coloured overskirt with gold brocade, her shoulder blades stuck out abruptly, like it tossed a rock into Xiao Zuoâs softest place in the heart, pressing in with pain. Good thing she still looked to be energetic, her face was red, and maybe because she had rouge on her cheeks, she seemed to have a much better complexion.
The first look Xiao You Ci got of Xiao Zuo, she sighed a breath of relief. This precious little brother of hers had grown up in the palace like all the stars held up the moon, and never suffered any hardship. Since the country fell, each night when she dreamed, she would not dare to think what kind of state he was in, with his neat and tidy looks, yet also spoiled from overwhelming wealth, once he falls into the muddy swampâ¦â¦ still good, still good, Xiao You Ci grabbed her thumping heartbeat, this crown prince of Jin did not lie to her, at least, from the way of dress and food, it was the best, butâ¦â¦
Xiao You Ci paused at the red places on the corners of Xiao Zuoâs eyes, the slightly hurt look from when he was angry just now had yet to disperse, these days, Xiao You Ciâs ability to read faces had progressed greatly, so she very quickly took back her gaze, and smiled to mediate, âAâZuo, itâs been a long time, Sister has always been worried youâ¦â¦â
Xiao You Ci paused, she went up and held Xiao Zuoâs curled hands, his palms were all sweaty, unknown if it was out of excitement or nervousness, it was all wet, âFor us to be able to speak like this, is truly a blessing from the heavens.â
âBiâ¦â¦ Sisterâ¦â¦â Xiao Zuoâs eye sockets were completely red, tears dampened the ends of his eyes, like it was about to drop down at any time, and got hurriedly rubbed by him in the next instant, and the ends of the eyes remained with a few marks after being rubbed. He could not hold it in again, and whimpered as he hugged Xiao You Ciâs hand, and muttered in a small voice like he was acting spoiled, âI miss you a lotâ¦â¦â
Xiao Zuo was taller by a lot, so Xiao You Ci had to slightly tip her toes to be able to lightly pat on his back, and smiled upon hearing it, âAlright, youâre already so big, you canât so easily cry like when you were young.â
âWhen did I, I never cried.â Xiao Zuo smiled through the tears, and slightly embarrassingly turned his head, and sniffled.
âAlright alright alright, aâZuoâs the strongest.â Xiao You Ci originally wanted to be like before and stroke his head, but when she lifted her hand she gave up, and only patted his back, and reminded him, âHis Highness is still here.â
Xiao Zuo then recalled that a whole He Xuan was still standing by the side, but immediately got angry that he was hiding the matter of Fu Zhan Chuan too , yet was also worried he would detailedly ask about Xiao You Ci, and when he thought to hereâ¦â¦ he brought Sister here without a single word, he probably already long knew every single action he made here in Nan Liang, yet did not reveal it. The more he thought, the more angrier he got, and could not help but ambiguously make a sarcastic remark, âHis Highness is so omnipotent, whatever I do would not escape his magic eyes, just let him watch.â
He Xuan did not continue, and only nodded his head at Xiao You Ci, âYou two have a chat, Ig will not be disturbing you two anymoreâ As he said this, he did not even look at Xiao Zuo, and turned and pushed the door out.
These twoâ¦â¦ Xiao You Ci hung her eyes down, seeing Xiao Zuo still look at the door, she pressed down the strange feeling inside her heart, and pulled on his sleeve, âAâZuo, aâZuo?â
âAh?â Xiao Zuo suddenly got startled and stammered, âWhâ¦â¦ what is it?â
âThey already left, donât look anymore.â
âI, I didnât look.â Xiao Zuo cleared his throat, and changed the topic, âSister, how did his Highness find you?â
âLast time you sent a letter to me, the next day, his Highness brought people over.â Xiao You Ci looked at the absentminded Xiao Zuo, then sighed, âAâZuo, tell me, between you and himâ¦â¦â
âWeâ¦â¦ it canât be explained in two or three words, I will slowly tell Sister later.â Xiao Zuo grabbed the teapot on the table and poured a cup of water, then handed it to Xiao You Ci, and smiled, âSister, tell me the things that happened that day after leaving the palace.â
Xiao You Ci glanced at him, then drank a mouthful of water, âThat day after taking advantage of the chaos to flee the capital, I encountered Consort Ru Yangâs carriage, and followed them all the way south to Yue Province for refuge, a few days agoâ¦â¦ the consort passed away, and I returned back along with their coffin, the consort and Feng Provinceâs Jing Xing Templeâs head monk have been friends in the past, so I stayed there for some time, I originally wanted to go to Jin to look for you after springâ¦â¦â
âSister has had it hard.â
âBeneath an overturned nest, where would there be intact eggs.â Xiao You Ci seemed to smile without care, âHow about you, have you been well in Jin?â After finishing, she pressed her voice low, âHas anyone made things hard for you?â
Xiao Zuo shook his head, âNo, his Highness has always been caring of me, Sister does not need to be concerned.â
âThen thatâs good.â Xiao You Ci was clearly relieved, âWhat happened today? Did you fight with him?â
Xiao Zuo hummed, and made some ambiguous remarks, Xiao You Ci saw he did not want to say, but did not chase it in the end, and only said, âNow that Nan Liangâs disorder is about to be pacified, his Highness is Jinâs crown heir, if you can avoid fighting with him, it would be better to go along with him, the present cannot compare to the past, so donât be so wilful, understand?â
Xiao Zuo silently looked at the floating tea leaves in the cup, and made an en sound.