Chapter 621: A World Without Me

The scorching afternoon sun shone on my head. As the torrid heat and acrophobia made me sweat down my back, Xiao Qin, who was wearing a straw hat, walked closer to me step by step.

“Now there’s no one who will disturb me and Ye Lin classmate… hehe…”

I trembled with fear as Xiao Qin got closer, then stuck out my arms to prevent her from getting to close and said:

“Don’t come any closer, what are you trying to do? Death by falling isn’t very appealing, if you’re really unhappy, then you can stab me. Didn’t you already take away my Swiss army knife?”

“That knife was a present Depressed Bro’s dad received as a diplomatic gift, so it’s very sharp! If you take that knife, you can end my life easily.”

I’m not afraid of a knife, but I am very afraid of heights! If it’s a scenic area, they should at least put up some railings. Not good, I’m losing strength in my legs, it’s hard to stand. I almost don’t even care about keeping up a man’s pride in front of Xiao Qin anymore.

But for me, who’s been bullied by Xiao Qin for six years starting from the age of six, do I even have pride as a man in front of her anymore?

“Ye Lin classmate really loves to joke around, how could I hurt you?”

Xiao Qin walked a bit closer to me again. Her actions contradicted her words as she slowly raised her hands up to her chest with her palms facing me, as if she was getting ready to push me off the ledge.

I really didn’t know how to feel at this moment. I really don’t want to die by falling to my death! If Xiao Qin stabbed me with a sharp knife, I would pull my heart out to scare her right before I die, that’s the so-called ‘Spartan’ way.

“If you want my heart, then take it.” Now that’s a cool line.

“Ye Lin classmate…” Xiao Qin raised her hands a bit higher and walked a bit closer.

Damn it, I’m going to be murdered by my girlfriend at only 14 years old.

What made me sad was that I couldn’t defend myself. I shouldn’t have been lured by Xiao Qin over here where I lose my strength when I look over the edge. Xiao Qin already knew this was my weakness!

I decided to sit down cross-legged.

One reason was to calm myself down, the other reason was to lower my center of gravity so I wouldn’t fall easily.

But my body still shook involuntarily.

Xiao Qin didn’t really care when I sat down to lower my center of gravity.

Don’t tell me she’s confident she could push me over the edge regardless of my posture?

Did she plan on falling over while holding on to me, so my position didn’t matter?

Don’t give up on life that easily! Did you get influenced by Zhuang Ni after forming an alliance with her?

My body felt a strong sense of crisis due to the fear of falling. It made my heart beat at 120 bpm, faster than an athlete doing intense exercise.

I suddenly had a weird feeling where my brain lacked blood flow.

It was lacking blood, but my vision was slowly being dyed red.

Wait no, this is a precursor to Berserk mode. I sealed it away because Peng TouSi warned me about the side effects. It involuntarily activated when my life was being threatened.

“Grrgrrgrrgrr…”

A low inhuman roar escaped between the crevices of my teeth. I felt that I was losing my sanity and that the second personality, which existed purely for the purpose of killing, was replacing the identity of “Ye Lin”.

Berserkers have no fear, so Berserk mode must have been activated to help me fight my fear of heights. If I obediently submit myself to the bloodthirsty Berserk mode, then I would no longer have to suffer from the psychological torture I’m suffering from right now.

But….

Berserk mode has no rationality, it only fights with instinct and will attack all nearby hostiles. If I entered berserk mode, then I will definitely attack Xiao Qin, since wanting to die with me would also be considered hostile.

Even though Xiao Qin was more skilled in martial arts and much better at Yin Yang Sanshou, she was still a girl. She also stayed at home for three years, so she can’t compete with me head-on in terms of muscular strength.

So, after turning on berserk mode, it’s likely Xiao Qin would be knocked over the edge. She may be able to beat berserk mode in an open space, but in this high-risk area, she may be killed by me since I beat her in strength and size.

Once I thought of this possibility, I didn’t even hesitate and immediately clenched my teeth.

Every single muscle fiber was spasming, every inch of skin was about to burst as I began a terrible confrontation with my brutal and merciless second personality.

Finally…

I forcefully pressured back the berserk mode that was activated due to my fear of heights.

It wasn’t an easy task. Other than my sore muscles, I also tore through the skin on my lips. But I swallowed the blood that came out, so Xiao Qin didn’t see it.

After that, although I still trembled slightly because of the height, overall, I was relatively calm.

Was it because I gave up my last chance to escape death? Would I rather be pushed off a cliff by Xiao Qin, instead of killing her?

When did Xiao Qin become so important to me? Don’t tell me… that I actually like her?

No, no way, there’s definitely another reason. Although I’m touched by her infatuation, but she’s way too unreliable. There’s no reason for me to like an unreliable girl, especially when she causes me a lot of trouble. I won’t be able to achieve anything with her around me. Because she transferred over, my final exam scores were even worse than last time.

Although I don’t care a lot about grades, that’s because I thought they couldn’t get any lower! Xiao Qin turned this impossibility into a possibility, so that means she can increase the lower limits on everything I do!

What, did you say I once sacrificed myself to save Ai Mi even though she gave me a lot of trouble? That’s not the same, Ai Mi is my sister! I’m not a lolicon, but I am a siscon! A younger sister has a special place in my heart, so they can be as unreasonable as they want!

That’s right, I must be treating Xiao Qin as a step-sister. That’s why I would rather die than injure her with berserk mode.

After I figured it out, I was satisfied even though I only had a few minutes left to live. I smiled with the relief of having realized the right answer.

“Xiao Qin, if you really want to do it, then do it. I won’t resist.”

I spread my arms out and closed my eyes.

“Huh.”

“But don’t die with me, Auntie Ren will be sad if you die. Your dad will also be sad, he might be a playboy, but he still cares a lot about you…”

“Strange, why does it seem like Ye Lin classmate knows a lot about my dad?”

That’s right, sometimes the closest relatives don’t understand each other. Like how Xiao Qin doesn’t know her dad has AIDS, or that the jade bracelet she’s wearing was a gift from her dad.

“Um… after you finish, tell… tell the class leader I slipped and fell over the edge, so no one knows you were involved.”

“What are you talking about~~~”

Sigh, I’m sorry to the class leader for dying. It was hard to organize a trip for the class, but now this…

But I still admire myself, since I was able to analyze the positives of my death even in my current situation.

Of course, I didn’t have life insurance, so my dad won’t get a large sum of money.

So even if Xiao Qin is not held responsible, Auntie Ren will subconsciously feel that my accident was related to her daughter. She’s already pregnant with my dad’s child, so she might marry my dad to comfort his broken heart out of guilt and other reasons.

No, not might, but definitely. Auntie Ren might act tough, but she was very caring. If my dad suffers from the pain of losing a son, she will definitely marry him, start a family, then take care of the newborn child together.

It’s like it’s fine even if I wasn’t here. It’s better than me losing all sense of reasoning and pushing Xiao Qin over the edge.

Otherwise, just the guilt that I have to bear in this life is unimaginably heavy.

Anyway, in the world I envisioned without my existence, Auntie Ren would definitely marry Dad, so I would only be a deceased step-brother to Xiao Qin.

Since Xiao Qin is a step-sister, it doesn’t matter if she kills me because she couldn’t think things through.

If I don’t treat her as the Little Tyrant, don’t treat her as my girlfriend, but treat her as my sister, then I can accept it.

Even I’m surprised at how big of a siscon I am.

“Xiao Qin… when I’m not here anymore. Can you treat our dad a bit better.”

“What you’re saying is getting stranger and stranger…”

“Also, I’m leaving Ai Mi in your care. We also have another, either a brother or a sister…”

Halfway through my sentence, I decided stop and not spill too much or it would affect my dad’s plans.

Finally I opened my eyes and looked at Xiao Qin, who had a puzzled face, but still had both hands raised in front her like she was about to push me, and asked with a bitter smile:

“Um, before you do it, can you call me brother once.”