CH 810

“I don’t need you to protect me even if Zhuang Ni is harboring bad intentions towards me.” I said to Xiao Qin, “You should have less contact with Zhuang Ni in the future, and don’t form any ‘flast chest alliance’ with her and do something to the class leader.”

“It’s not an alliance of flat chests, it’s a temporary strategic alliance.” Xiao Qin protested, “Also, after I came back from Cui Song Mountain, I haven’t actively contacted Zhuang Ni. Even if she called and asked me to work with her, I only asked her for advice on drawing…”

“Before making Winnie my assistant, I also asked Zhuang Ni to be my assistant, but blocked me after she read “Cthulhu Also Wants Love”. I don’t know how I offended her…”

Do you even need to ask? It’s because your vegetable-style drawings injured Zhuang Ni’s artist eyes! Not only are the drawings awful, the plot is also brain-dead. The plot of the 4th chapter hit an all-time low! Cthulhu got hemorrhoids and was shitting blood everyday, so he had to go to one of the top ten hospitals to get cured. How exactly does that scenario fit into a horror manga?

It’s not horror, but it doesn’t even fall into romance either. The editor was right, “Cthulhu Also Wants Love” is just a comedy manga.

All the readers roasted the plot of chapter 4, but for some reason the discussion began to revolve around the fact that Cthulhu is an octopus monster and do octopus have an anus?

“The mouth of an octopus is the anus, it’s disgusting.”

“No, the anus is just really close to the mouth.”

“I watched animal planet a few days ago and I learned both octopus and cuttlefish squirt ink out of their anus…”

“I hate you, now I can’t watch the Squid Girl anime anymore.”

Anyway, the dissolution of the evil alliance between Xiao Qin and Zhuang Ni is still a cause for celebration. I’m not a saint, so it’s fine as long as Xiao Qin can stay away from Zhuang Ni’s bad influence. I don’t have the time to also save Zhuang Ni.

In the end, the sister discipline plan is only for my sisters. Zhuang Ni isn’t my sister, so I don’t care what happens to her.

At lunch time, I learned from Liu HuaiShui that the election for the prettiest girl in school will be handled mainly by him and Eunuch Cao, where they will collect votes from the second and third year students (first-year students are still viewed by us as elementary school students, so they aren’t yet eligible to participate in the election).

Just like when Shen ShaoYi was selected as the most handsome boy in school was unilaterally handled by the girls, this time we only intended to ask the boys for their opinions on the prettiest girl in school.

In general, unless there was a junior girl with outstanding beauty, the position of prettiest girl in school would belong to a girl in her third year. The list of candidates for prettiest girl school girl are pretty much all only third-year girls.

The hottest candidate was Shu Sha and Liu HuaiShui and Eunuch Cao estimates Shu Sha will monopolize more than half of the votes.

There were many girls who were on the list, and Xu Yan, who inherited the mantle of the former prettiest girl in school and actively showed her face in every school event, was one of them.

Unfortunately, Xu Yan couldn’t even be ranked in the top 20 based on looks alone. Though she did grow a lot in the past six months, so she had quite a good body.

Including Xu Yan, who was at the bottom of the list, the list candidates reached as many as 12 people. Other than 3 people who were second year girls, the remaining 9 people were all in their third year.

Maybe it’s because the boys in our class were ugly, so there were more pretty girls in our class than in other classes in order to achieve some kind of balance of appearances.

The class leader Shu Sha not only made the list, but she was a shoe-in to be elected. The others who also made the list were Gong CaiCai, Xiao Qin, and… Loud Mouth.

It wasn’t surprising that Gong CaiCai was selected as a candidate. She was fair-skinned, beautiful, and rich. Any man who married her would be happy.

As for Xiao Qin, no one really thought about her since she always followed me around and was known as the boss’ woman.

Since I stated I wasn’t against adding Xiao Qin to the list and even voted for Xiao Qin, it was natural for her to be on the list.

It was surprising Loud Mouth was on the list, it was probably someone’s idea of a prank.

Other than it being a prank, there were other guys who already had girlfriends. Since their girlfriends had no chance of making it on the list, they voted for Loud Mouth so they wouldn’t make their girlfriends mad.

After Loud Mouth heard about it, she didn’t think she was being ridiculed. She publicly expressed:

“I have the rights to be a candidate. Why can’t a fat girl be the prettiest girl in school? It’s only the current generations who think skinny is beauty. We have to restore being fat as a beauty standard first in order to bring back the great Tang dynasty.”

“That’s right.” Eunuch Cao said as he sat on top of his desk, “Loud Mouth is like a white bao bun and she smiles all day. Letting her be one of the candidates can restore 28 Middle’s optimism. Also, as long as she loses forty pounds, she might even be a beauty…”

“Get lost.” Loud Mouth elbowed Eunuch Cao off his desk, “I don’t want to lose weight. There’s so much delicious food out there, why would I want to lose weight? Whoever wants to be skin and bones can go and be skin and bones.”

“Facebook.”

Zhuang Ni was putting on airs and holding an English textbook, but she purposely said the words slowly and anyone could tell she was basically making fun of her for being fat.

The first reason Zhuang Ni wasn’t a candidate was because she could stop coming to school again at any time, so there was no point electing a girl who didn’t come to school, and the second reason was that Zhuang Ni’s hatred of men and utility knife was known far and wide. If she appeared on the list of candidates without her consent, then get voted on by the men she hates, Liu HuaiShui feels that he, as the host of the current election, was in danger.

Xiong YaoYue was also excluded because she was too manly. A lot of people thought other schools will think our school is gay if we voted for her.

As Liu HuaiShui ran around the campus collecting votes, he also asked everyone if they had other thoughts, and the people’s opinions were as follows:

“Shu Sha is definitely the best among all of them, I really want to be trampled by Shu Sha in high heels!” a certain student who didn’t want to reveal his name said.

“Who was the first one who voted for Loud Mouth, he’s too irresponsible! If Loud Mouth was elected, our school would become a laughingstock!” a male student who was even fatter than Loud Mouth said.

“I really wish I could touch Gong CaiCai’s boobs before I die, sob sob sob~~~” an easily excited skinny boy said.

“Of course I will vote for Shu Sha. Even her bike seat is so cute…” a certain boy who was definitely not Zuo Xiong said.

“I actually noticed Xiao Qin right when she just transferred over, she gives off a girl next door feeling and she’s really cute.”

“Shu Sha is too strong, Gong CaiCai is too weak, I think Xiao Qin is just right, if only Ye Lin wasn’t always around her.”

“Hey, have any of you heard Xiao Qin talk before. It seems like she doesn’t talk to anyone but Ye Lin, I’m envious.”

“Hmph… I’ve heard Xiao Qin read aloud in class. It’s true that Shu Sha has the highest overall level, and it’s also true that Gong CaiCai has the biggest breasts, but I think Xiao Qin has the best voice.”

These are some of the boys who didn’t dare show their support for Xiao Qin before this election.

There were of course people who complained because Zhuang Ni and Xiong YaoYue weren’t candidates.

“I think Xiong YaoYue is very good, there were also rumors that Shen ShaoYi likes her, but I don’t know if it’s true or not.”

“Why is Zhuang Ni not on the list? She wears black stockings in school every day, long live black stockings!”

“Xiao YueYue’s canine teeth are quite cute. I don’t think it’s humiliating for our school to elect a tomboy as the prettiest girl in school.”

“I’m not unhappy. Our class leader would certainly get elected and I don’t want to participate in any events where I have no chance of winning.” Xiong YaoYue said.

The other people who supported Xu Yan, the cheerleader captain, OuYang NaLa, or the second year girls, forgive me for not listing them all, but they were destined to be like Gong CaiCai, Xiao Qin, and Loud Mouth, just accompaniments on the list.

I privately asked Xiao Qin what she thought about being on the list.

“I don’t really have any thoughts. I’ve actually been the prettiest girl in school before…” Xiao Qin said and it shocked me.

“When?”

“It was… at Thousand Crane girls school.” Xiao Qin said in embarrassment, “I was the predecessor of the Rose Group, the boss of the Overlord Flowers, so I was elected. All the other girls were afraid of being hit, so they all voted for me…”

She said as she slowly covered her face and wanted to hide herself.

So you were elected with a hundred percent of the votes? I really don’t even know what to say. It’s like how Kim Jong Un will obviously be elected if North Korea hosts a male beauty competition.

But considering the appearance of the girls in the Rose Group, I think Xiao Qin being elected wasn’t entirely because of her tyrannical dictatorship.

Based on this logic, Xiao Qin was once my girlfriend, but she was also the prettiest girl in school, so that means I was once the boyfriend of the the prettiest girl in school.

It seems like it’s worth showing off, but I won’t be like my dad who called his son to show off after hugging Auntie Ren all night. I don’t have a son yet.

In the afternoon break, I heard Loud Mouth gossiping and talking about how the class leader’s mother will stay in Dong Shan city for a few more days. The class leader’s mood has been very good due to her parents’ company. She also switched her day duty schedule with others and intended to go home on time to spend more time with her mother.