Chapter 22: Twenty-one

Confession #20: I had a hard time listening to good advice, even when it threatened me.

Five days passed. I kept my distance from Reese, even though it probably didn’t matter ~what~ I did at this point. Patricia knew exactly who she was and how important she was to me.

But even if the wicked witch wasn’t part of the equation, I was not the kind of person Reese needed in her life.

Not that it mattered how far away I stayed, because the physical distance had become only a technicality. Now that I had her number in my phone, we started texting. Daily. And through those messages, I think we ended up actually growing closer than ever.

I knew I should’ve stopped. But I couldn’t seem to help myself. No one could make me smile like Reese did whenever she went and called me nonsensical names like goober or buzzkill.

So I found myself skimming back through and rereading our playful banter during a lull at the Country Club one night when a ball of brown fur darted toward me, yapping out a happy greeting.

I blinked dumbly at it before saying, “~Gidget~?” It had to be; she even had that same pink bow attached to her fur.

Holy shit, where had ~she~ come from?

I knelt beside the pooch, and she licked my hand, panting up at me in adoration.

“What’re you doing here?” I asked in wonder as if I actually expected an answer, just as some guy came jogging up.

“I am so sorry,” he gushed. “She got away from her leash. Damn thing is way too big for her neck, but the wife adores it, so…”

I looked from the man’s brown loafers to his face just in time to catch a chagrined shrug. Transferring my gaze to a familiar bejeweled collar in his hand, I gave a painful swallow, remembering the thing squeezing my throat all too well not too long ago.

Yeah, it probably would be too big for a tiny little dog like Gidget if it had fit me just right.

“No problem,” I said, lifting Gidget in order to hand her over to her owner. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” The man smiled gratefully as he took his pet back, only to crinkle his eyebrows and ask, “Hey, how did you know her name?”

I froze, no lie readily coming to mind. “I… I’m sorry, what?”

The man tipped his head to the dog as he slipped the collar back around her neck. “You called her Gidget. How’d you know that?”

“Oh.” Mind still blank, I just stared at him. “I…”

~Don’t ask me that~, I wanted to say. ~And don’t wear your red Speedo again until you wash it first.~

“Oh, ~I ~told him,” a new voice said, causing both me and Gidget’s owner to glance over in surprise.

When I found Eva Mercer strolling toward us, I gaped at her badly. There was no earthly reason why she would come to ~my~ rescue, unless there was some kind of ulterior motive behind it.

Shit. I immediately wondered what her motive was. It couldn’t be good, that was for sure.

The man smiled. “Well, hey there, Eva. I didn’t know you were here.” He glanced past her. “Are you parents around too?”

She smiled and waved an unconcerned hand toward the front entrance of the club. “They’re inside, eating.” Then she touched my arm, making me jump as she drew me into the conversation. “Mason and I are old classmates. We were talking when you pulled up with Gidget, and I told him her name then.”

“Ah.” The man looked at me with a new expression as if he accepted me now as one of ~them~ since Eva had vouched for me. “That makes sense.”

Eva glanced at me with a small smirk. “Yes, we think it’s just adorable how you treat her like one of the family.”

Grinning with affection, the man lifted Gidget to his face and she happily licked his cheek. I winced, remembering when her dog tongue had been in ~my~ ear. Seriously, how could he stand her slimy, wet dog breath?

Grinning at Eva, he answered, “Yeah, she keeps me company on those nights when Greta’s working late at the hospital.”

I could only guess that Greta was his wife, the client I had served.

With a teasing grin, Eva set her hands on her hips. “Dr. Masterson,” she scolded. “You two are leading surgeons in that hospital. Can’t you guys even schedule yourselves so you get the same days off?”

Dr. Masterson merely laughed. “I’m not sure we’d know what to do with each other if we ever had free time together.” Snuggling his face into Gidget’s fur, he grinned at the dog before nodding to Eva. “I’m going to head in and say hi to your folks.” Then he sent me a head bob. “Thanks for catching my girl here.”

“Anytime,” I said, watching him walk away and feeling like the ultimate slime ball for smiling at him as if we were pals after everything I’d ever done with his wife. What a fucking joke I was.

Eva sighed from beside me. “He seems like such a good, stand-up, respectable doctor, doesn’t he?” she said as she also watched him enter the building, her expression turning sour. “You’d never guess he gets off on kiddie porn and watching ~fathers~ molest their daughters. Fucking prick bastard.”

I glanced at her, my eyes wide. “~What~?”

She turned abruptly to face me. “You’re welcome, by the way.”

My brow pinched into a frown. “For what?”

“For saving your bacon just now.” She lifted her eyebrows meaningfully. “I could tell you were floundering for an answer as to how you knew Gidget’s name. So I had to guess you’d learned it when you were at Dr. Masterson’s house…with his wife, who’s also Dr. Masterson, by the way. Dr. Greta Masterson… In case you never learned her name while you were screwing her.”

I said nothing, just watched her, wondering what she wanted from me.

“So, yeah,” she went on, snickering bitterly. “I know you’re probably wondering how you could ever repay me, right? Well, never fear, because I have ~just~ the solution.” Shifting her expression into a bright smile, she said, “Stay the fuck away from my cousin, and we’ll call it even. Okay?”

I pulled back and lifted my eyebrows. “Excuse me?”

Eva stepped close. “Stay…away…from Reese.” She lifted her eyebrows right back at me. “Was ~that~ clear enough for you?”

“No,” I said, growing pissed on Reese’s behalf as I backed away from Eva. “You don’t control her and decide who she can and can’t befriend.”

“~Befriend~?” she repeated as if amused by the word. “Is that how you convince yourself it’s okay to keep sniffing around her? Because you two are just ~friends~?”

“We ~are~ just friends,” I spat, scowling hard, even as guilt nipped at me because she was right. I had pretty much convinced myself it was okay to merely talk to Reese, to ~just~ be her friend. We weren’t doing anything wrong.

But inside, I knew better.

“Right.” Eva laughed harshly and shook her head. “And controlling her is the last thing I have on my mind, you idiot. She’s the best person I know. I don’t want to ruin that; I want to ~preserve~ it. She’s better than you. She’s better than me. She’s better than everyone in this god-forsaken town, and the sooner she gets the fuck out of here, the better. But until then, I’m not letting you or any other lowlife ~taint~ the purity that is my amazing cousin. You got that, asshole?”

My mouth fell open. For a moment, I just stared at her, shocked by how much she actually cared about Reese, shocked that she cared about ~anything~.

I had planned on being nothing but snide and hostile to her, but her genuine concern for Reese shocked me into a sincere response. “I don’t want to taint her, either,” I admitted.

Eva threw her hands in the air. “Then you know what you have to do, don’t you? You have to stay ~away~ from her.”

“Yeah,” I said slowly, shaking my head. “Except I don’t think I can.”

“Well, you ~better~.” She pointed threateningly. “Or I’m going to make your life a living hell. Do you hear me?”

I heard her. I even respected what she had to say and knew she was right.

I just…

I couldn’t stay completely away from Reese, no matter how hard I tried.

She was my light.

“Eva,” a sharp voice snapped from behind us. Mercer jumped and whirled toward the woman, who approached and frowned at me before narrowing Eva with a scowl.

“Yes, Mother?” Eva said, making me focus more intently on the woman’s face. She must be Reese’s aunt, Mads, her mom’s younger sister.

Eva’s mother glanced at me once more, with eyes that were the same shade as Reese’s. “Come away now,” she said, taking her daughter’s arm forcefully. “We don’t associate with people like him.”

“Oh, trust me,” Eva said dryly. “I wasn’t associating with him.”

“Good. Keep it that way. Your father and I have a reputation to uphold. I won’t have you tarnishing it by getting caught anywhere near such gutter trash.”

“Of course, Mother. He’s gutter trash,” Eva repeated, staring straight at me. “I got it. I just hope ~he~ does.” Then she let her mother whisk her back inside the Country Club.

I watched them go, feeling hollow inside as Eva’s words resounded through me like an echo chasing itself.

~You’re gutter trash…gutter trash. Gutter trash. She’s better than you…don’t want you to taint her…stay away. Stay away…stay away.~

If she hadn’t repeated the very words I’d thought to myself over and over again these past few weeks, I probably would’ve been able to blow her off entirely. But I’d already considered everything, and she was right. Glancing down at my phone, I reread Reese’s cheerful words, and an ache lacerated my chest.

Why couldn’t life be simple, and I could just be with the person who made me happy?

With a groan, I shoved my phone into my pocket and tried not to think about the Reese dilemma. But then my phone dinged, and my heart gave a little leap of anticipation, hoping it was her.

When I checked the screen, however, the message was from Amanda Riker.

Amanda: I need you.

Grinding my teeth, I ignored the text and shoved my phone back into my pocket.

She messaged again an hour later, then an hour after that. The more she tried to get a hold of me, the more determined I became to ignore her, and the more the bitterness grew in me, resenting ~every~ client who’d ever contacted me. I kind of wanted to flip the entire world the bird. If I couldn’t have the one I wanted, then none of them could have me. ~That’s~ how I felt.

When I woke the next morning to my phone lighting up again with another message, I sighed and tugged my pillow over my head, wondering why I hadn’t just turned the damn thing off. In fact… I reached for it to turn it off now, but then I noticed the message wasn’t from Amanda, thank God.

Reese: Ready for the calculus test tomorrow? Wanna bet over which one of us makes a higher score?

And just like that, brightness lit up inside me. Smiling, I rolled my eyes and responded.

Mason: Why do I feel as if I’m being hustled right now?

When those three little dots popped onto the screen almost as soon as the message flipped to ~Read~, my heart started to beat a little faster. I loved it when she immediately responded.

Reese: You know, if you had studied your ass off, you might actually have a chance of beating me. A small, insignificant chance, but a chance nonetheless.

Forgetting everything but bantering with her, I shot back my own instant reply.

Mason: Sadly, I still have my ass, so that should make my chances of beating you, what…in the negative percentile range? (Is negative percent even a thing?)

Reese: Clearly, you’ve already lost, because you would know the answer about negative percentiles if you’d actually done your homework. Loser. You should just give me my winnings now. PS-I wouldn’t say it’s sad at all that you still have your ass. I’m quite fond of it as it is. ;)

I threw back my head and laughed. This was what I loved most about Reese. She could flirt, ridicule, and trash talk all in the same breath and make it fun and enticing while she was at it.

Mason: I don’t recall actually taking you up on the bet, cheater. But regardless, isn’t retaining my ass prize enough for your pervy eyes?

Reese: Good point. I therefore retract my demand for a different prize. But now I’m wondering when I’ll actually get to see said ass again. Are you still determined to stay away until all horny guy urges are gone, or can I finally have my friend back now?

Biting my lip, I typed my response.

Mason: Not yet.

Her typing bubble popped up, and I could only imagine what she had to say about that, so I beat her to the punch, adding more.

Mason: But soon.

Reese: HOW soon?

A brief thought fluttered through my head about Eva warning me away with her genuine reasons of keeping Reese safe, and then I recalled Patricia’s threatening words, but I still couldn’t seem to tell Reese I should never see her again.

Mason: A few days maybe.

Reese: I’m holding you to that, Hotness. Been missing my study partner something fierce.

I didn’t answer. I couldn’t. Because I was positive I missed her more.

I could’ve sat here all day just talking to her, but I needed to get ready and off to school. Maybe I’d spot her around campus.

As corny as it sounded, there was an extra bounce in my step by the time I entered the kitchen where Mom and Sarah were eating breakfast.

“Morning,” I said brightly, whistling softly under my breath as I ruffled Sarah’s hair when I passed her chair to snag a banana from a basket on the counter.

“Good morning,” Mom answered, watching me curiously over the top of her coffee cup. Her brows lifted. “You seem to be full of smiles this morning. And did I hear you ~laughing~ in your room a minute ago?”

“Oh.” Surprised she’d even noticed, I flushed and cleared my throat. “I read something funny on my phone.”

Sarah snickered over my reaction, making me wrinkle my nose at her.

“Well, it was nice to hear.” Mom rose to her feet and moved to the sink to rinse out her empty cup. “I can’t remember the last time I heard you laugh.” After setting her mug on the counter, she turned my way. “You’ve been all-around happier since school started. I think college has been good for you.”

And then she did the craziest thing ever. She touched my arm—like honest-to-God touched me with a motherly kind of encouraging pat at the end of the contact—as she passed by.

“I’m going to get my purse and I’ll be ready to go. Okay, Sarah?” she said before disappearing down the hall.

I gaped after her before turning to my sister. “Did you see that? She just ~touched~ me.”

My sister only giggled. “You’re weird.”

“Weird?” I gasped in feigned outrage. “If I’m weird, it’s only because ~you~ like me best that way.” Then I commenced to tickle her until she was laugh-screaming for me to stop.

Chuckling, I had mercy on her and kissed her forehead before telling her goodbye and slipping out the back door.

My mother had been right though, I ~was~ happier these days. Even when I was miserable over missing Reese, things had been better than they’d been before.

Needing a fix from my source of happiness, I visited the library that afternoon. I’d spotted Reese on the other side of the quad earlier in the day, but that just wasn’t enough for me. I needed more.

Since I knew she worked part-time at the college library on days she didn’t babysit Sarah, I went there, hoping she might be on duty.

I struck pay dirt a few minutes later when I caught sight of her organizing books on a shelf up on a small, second-floor browsing area. My first instinct was to bounce right up there and say hi. But this joyous bubbling sensation in my chest had me freaked out, wondering if I’d just make a huge fool of myself if I approached her right now in the overly eager mood I was in.

So I found a butt-ugly green couch to crash on, not far from where she was working, and I pulled her copy of ~The Chamber of Secrets ~from my messenger bag, deciding to read until she noticed me and ~she~ did the approaching.

But that plan backfired when Monica, of all people, appeared in front of me, trying to get lucky. I had thought I had her convinced to stay away from me, but Patricia must’ve gotten into her head and bolstered her ego or something. She was more persistent than ever. And sadly, I couldn’t bitch her out like I had last time—not with Reese being so close and within hearing distance. I tried to keep it low-key and reject Monica as subtly as possible. But she ended up leaving me her business card before strolling off, and I could only imagine how awful the whole encounter looked to Reese… If she’d even noticed at all.

I risked a glance her way, but she seemed intent on her work, so I couldn’t tell if she’d detected her English professor’s brief presence or not.

I was about to just stand up and go talk to her already when a smirking Eva strolled up, her arms crossed over her chest and expression full of evil mischief.

Ah, hell. This could not be good.

“Well, look who’s hanging out in a library, actually reading,” she greeted. “Or is that just a front to meet some horny skank?”

I could barely blink at her before she slapped Reese’s book from my hands, sending it crashing to the floor, and she sat on my lap in its place.

“What the hell?” I hissed, leaning backward away from her.

She looped her arms around my neck and loudly claimed, “I just saw Dr. Janison up here. Isn’t she one of your regulars?” Then she leaned in and more quietly whispered, “I told you to stay away from her or I’d make you pay. Well, rent’s due, buddy.”

“Eva,” I growled. “Get off me.” I tried to tug her off by grabbing her wrist and pulling, but she didn’t budge.

“So, did you two actually ~do~ it up here,” she went on conversationally, lifting her voice again because I’m sure she knew Reese was close and could hear us, “or were you only setting up your next appointment? Personally, I think it’d be hot to do it in some place public. Like a library. Except we’d have to be too quiet.”

Shifting my face to the side, I gnashed my teeth and lifted my hands, not sure what else to do. “Seriously, you need to get off me. ~Now~.”

“Seriously,” she repeated smugly. “You need to loosen up.”

She started touching me the way I hated it most when clients touched me, and a sick, cold dread consumed me, because I knew Reese could see.

She could see exactly what I was.

A part of me died, knowing another one of my dirty truths was being revealed to her. Because this was me; this was what people did to me, and I let them.

“So, I’m not drunk now,” Eva went on, killing all sense of hope and light inside me. “You don’t have to be a gentleman any longer. Still want to turn me down?”

“Yes,” I seethed, restraining myself as best as I could to keep from bodily harming Reese’s cousin. “I’m not going to sleep with you, Mercer. ~Ever~.”

“Why?” she growled, losing her evil, playful edge and growing just plain pissed. “Because I’m not one of your ~professors~? Because I can’t give you an automatic A for every orgasm well received?”

I shook my head, just wanting this over. She’d already accomplished her mission and allowed Reese to see me as the filthy whore. Why was she drawing the torture out? Could I not just crawl off and waste away in peace now?

“Actually, there are several reasons,” I said. “And none of them have to do with that. First of which, ~you~ have a boyfriend. Not to mention, I don’t ~want~ to have sex with you, plus your cousin is—”

“Don’t you dare mention Reese,” she hissed. “She’s been through enough and doesn’t need another loser asshole hurting her. So just stay away. Got it?”

Not expecting her to say something like ~that~, I focused on her intently to see if I could spot a lie. When I saw nothing but truth, an angry shock consumed me.

I remembered that scar on the back of Reese’s neck and her determination to hide it. Eva’s words swirled back through my head—~another loser asshole hurting her~—and it replayed there until I realized someone Reese ~had dated~ must’ve gone after her with that knife. She’d come right out and told me she had a bad history with just one guy. She had thought she’d fallen for some fucker, and in return, the bastard had ~cut~ her.

Son of a bitch. I’d kill him.

“Who hurt her?” I demanded. “Hurt her ~how~?” Except I’d already guessed everything.

I clenched my teeth while a cold fury spread through my limbs.

Eva only smiled. “She’s not to be played with. If you want to play, you’ll have to settle for me.”

I snorted. “Pass.”

“Oh, I’m sure I could change your mind.”

When she grabbed my package through my jeans, I was done.

I surged to my feet and dumped her off my lap, right onto the floor in an angry heave. “Don’t ever touch me again.”

I started to storm off, but then Reese appeared in front of me. Drawing in a sharp breath, I braced for her to either wallop me or read me the riot act for shoving her cousin to the floor, but instead, her accusing finger didn’t even shake in my direction.

“Eva!” she hissed harshly. “What the hell are you doing? That’s sexual assault.”

Eva merely sniffed as she picked herself up and dusted off her backside. “Whatever. He’s a prostitute, ReeRee. He’s ~nothing~.”

I sucked in a breath. It was one thing to be called that and to believe it because I ~lived~ it, but letting Reese hear it sprayed around so casually stung. I didn’t like ~her~ thinking I was shit.

But I guess she didn’t buy into Eva’s accusations. She retorted, “He’s a human ~being~! He has just as many rights ~not~ to be harassed every time he turns around as you or I do. And how dare you do this to Alec? Were you seriously just going to cheat on him?”

Lifting her nose with a sniff, Eva muttered, “You’re blind if you can’t see I just did this for ~you~.”

“Me?” Reese gaped in disbelief. “I guess I’m totally blind then. How did you do this for ~me~?”

“He’s not good for you. I was trying to keep him away from you.”

Sighing, Reese rubbed at a spot on the center of her forehead. “Believe it or not, E, you don’t have to bother. Mason and I are just friends.”

Eva shook her head sadly. “Yeah, right. Keep telling yourself that, sweetie. Maybe someday our dead grandma Dixon will actually believe it.” Searing me with a glare, she hissed, “You know better than to pant after her.”

Then she sniffed and stormed off.

Reese remained next to me. Afraid to even look at her, I closed my eyes briefly before sucking up the fear and just turning her way to blurt, “I’m sorry.”

Her face crinkled with confusion before she said, “For ~what~?”

I lifted my hands only to let them fall hopelessly at my sides. “I just knocked your cousin to the floor.”

“You don’t have to apologize for ~that~,” she told me. “I’m surprised you didn’t dump her off your lap sooner.”

And now I felt like an idiot for not shoving Eva away sooner, because I’d certainly ~wanted~ to, I just hadn’t thought I ~should~. It still felt weird knowing I’d hurt her, even in a minor way. And last night, I’d grabbed Patricia’s wrist as roughly as I could.

A fear unfurled inside me, making me wonder if I was coming apart at the seams. It didn’t matter if they’d deserved my treatment, I couldn’t believe I’d hurt two women in less than a single twenty-four-hour period.

As if reading all the guilt spiraling through me, Reese gripped my arm and then hugged me. “I never meant to bring the wrath of Eva down on you.” She winced apologetically.

Not expecting the contact, my muscles contracted in confused surprise. “You didn’t,” I insisted, afraid to hug her back because I might not ever let her go. “I brought it on myself.”

So she ended up pulling back all on her own to scowl at me. “Just because you had some misguided notion when you were eighteen, thinking you had to do something drastic and unnecessary to save your family, doesn’t mean you deserve to be treated with such constant degradation by every woman who crosses your path.”

Her defense caused a longing ache to tear through me. I had a bad feeling this girl already owned my soul. Spotting a stray piece of silken dark hair that had fallen into her face during her impassioned speech, I reached for it and tucked it safely behind her ear.

“You’re not like anyone I’ve ever met before,” I admitted without meaning to. “Where did you come from, Reese Randall?”

She blinked at me once, obviously not expecting my reaction, then she said, “Ellamore, Illinois.”

I grinned, my chest filling with both joy and pain because I knew this moment couldn’t last. Deciding to make the best of it before it was over, I hauled her back into my arms and hugged her back to me.

I buried my nose in her hair, inhaling her sweet pea scent, even as my fingers wandered, finding the scar on the back of her neck. Then I leaned around to kiss the spot.

“Thank you for being my friend. But Mercer was right. I ~do~ know better than to pant after you. You should never have to deal with any of my shit.” I stepped back before picking up the ~Harry Potter~ book Eva had tossed to the floor. After grabbing my bag as well, I sent her one last farewell glance. “I’ll see you around.”

Except we both knew I wouldn’t. I was really going to stay away this time.

At least, I hoped I could, even as another part of me cheered for me to fail…again.