Behind

I'm leaving you behind, aren't I?

Even though I see you in my future,

I can do that, I can imagine how things

Might be, one day, between us.

Leaving you behind would be like leaving

behind myself, a crime I would not have

the courage to commit, and yet I am doing it,

without even realizing.

Everything becomes more languid every day,

I wonder what I'm following, maybe a ghost

beacon, a mirage of the horizon, a

rainbow without a pot of gold at its end.

What's behind me? An island, an investment,

is that what my heart needs? Is there

land across the sea, or am I swimming

To the ocean where there is nothing waiting for me?

I don't want to leave you behind, and yet

I am doing so. Months and months of doubt, of

absence of action, or was that my action?

My heart does not know what it's leaving behind.